Why is this time different?

emotigirl
emotigirl Posts: 7 Member
in Getting Started
Hey everyone
I re-started to focus on myself. I've been on WW before with little progress and have been going up an down few pounds for the last five year with no real progress. I want to lose 80 pounds- a big goal, but I've always dreamt to weight 125 pounds...

I am determined to lose weight but I can't stop the voice in my mind that is wondering if I'll fail this time as well...
Have any of you gone or are going through this self-doubt? How did you overcome or dealt with it?

Thanks!
«1

Replies

  • DeeDeeMee
    DeeDeeMee Posts: 133 Member
    It's weird, but this time I just knew. I've been struggling with my weight for years but a few months ago I just knew that this time it would be easy. I've had a big lifestyle change that's played a huge part in it though, and my new doctor is freaking amazing.

    :):)
  • bajoyba
    bajoyba Posts: 1,153 Member
    Baby steps. It's hard to imagine yourself as something drastically different than what you are now. I think it's normal to experience a certain level of doubt or disbelief. Sometimes I still can't picture myself at my goal weight or in my goal body, and at the same time, I can't really remember exactly what it was like to be 60 pounds heavier.
    I've had a relatively easy time losing my weight because I chose a plan that was very sustainable. I don't feel like I'm "on a diet", so I have no reason to give up. Just set small goals, choose a sustainable long-term plan, and you'll accomplish your goals before you know it. :smile:
  • joggingforme
    joggingforme Posts: 7
    The mind is built to remind you of certain things. We can't stop it, but we can train it to make it think the way we want too. Thinking that you'll fail will only keep you from doing what you have to do. I to had some doubts when starting over. I kept telling myself ''what if I can't, what if I'll fail, what if I don't lose any weight'' and so on and so forth. But then I thought ''what if I never start''. And that's when I stopped thinking. See, I put thoughts into action. My thought said ''I want a better body'', because I really do, so I gave it an action. I got up, I jogged, I'm eating better, I don't have a defeated attitude. I listen to motivational speeches on youtube. I search fit bodies online and look at what I know I can get if I put my hard work into it. I know it's hard, but nothing in this life comes easy. We must search within ourselves and take all that negative thinking we have and throw in some positive. I hope you find the positive you need to push yourself. Look at yourself in the mirror, point at yourself and say ''it's time for a change!''. :-)
  • PunkyRachel
    PunkyRachel Posts: 1,959 Member
    Okay, not to sound like a cliche, but you must look at each day as a fresh start. Just keep telling yourself I will do this, I can do this! I yo-yoed with my weight for 10 years staying between US size 16-20. Every time I lost a little something would happen in my life and I'd give up and gain it all back. Well 2 years ago I decided to not give up. I'm still not to my goal weight which is also 125, but I'm currently healthier than I have ever been, and I just keep pushing myself. I have faith you you too will accomplish your goals, best of luck of your journey!
  • amberflo143
    amberflo143 Posts: 94 Member
    Same here I just know. I have logged in for 60 days today and lost about 24 pounds from the day I decided to make a change. It really is the voice in me now telling me I can do it. I completed the couch to 5 k and now I am working on the 10k. Setting small goals, my first goal was to lose 10%, I did and now to lose 20%. This morning I ran 6.5 k before work. just making a habit and taking pics to show the changes and not always looking at the scale has worked this time. There are times I work out extra hard to eat more... finding the balance of work had play hard it working good!

    Good luck and you can do this!!
  • DeeDeeMee
    DeeDeeMee Posts: 133 Member
    Same here I just know. I have logged in for 60 days today and lost about 24 pounds from the day I decided to make a change. It really is the voice in me now telling me I can do it. I completed the couch to 5 k and now I am working on the 10k. Setting small goals, my first goal was to lose 10%, I did and now to lose 20%. This morning I ran 6.5 k before work. just making a habit and taking pics to show the changes and not always looking at the scale has worked this time. There are times I work out extra hard to eat more... finding the balance of work had play hard it working good!

    Good luck and you can do this!!

    Glad I'm not the only one! How awesome is that feeling!!??

    Sorry op, my earlier post really wasn't helpful from an advice point of view. I really wish I could impart to you the knowledge that a calorie deficit will just work. Have faith in yourself and be brutally honest in your logging with MFP and I guarantee it will work for you.
  • unFATuated
    unFATuated Posts: 204 Member
    I didn't know it would be different, though I do have my wedding coming up this January as a bit of an incentive. I also realised that this was my 10th year of being overweight and I think that had a lot to do with it too, I think I just didn't want it to keep being that way. I've lost weight before. Last year I went from 86kg to 77kg, then slowly gained it back over the New Year and up to May. In May I bought a flexible dieting/IIFYM program I found through a trainer on FB. I won't say I haven't had struggles and setbacks, but I've managed to get back down to 66kg from 86kg on the 1st of May.

    I think you need to find your motivator and a realistic goal. I'm not saying yours isn't realistic, but maybe break it up into mini goals along the way. I was this weight (and even lower once upon a time!) at some point so I knew it was possible for me. But still I worked towards a few different goals. Some of these included weighing under 80kg, going from the 'Obese' BMI to the 'Overweight' BMI, weighing under 75kg, under 70kg, then going from the 'Overweight' BMI to the 'Normal' BMI.
  • alisonlynn1976
    alisonlynn1976 Posts: 929 Member
    This time is different for me because I'm sold on the concept that it's a permanent lifestyle change, not a diet.

    My starting point and end goal are similar to yours. I had smaller goals of going from obese to overweight BMI and from overweight to normal BMI, and I'm now focused on my last goal of getting to 120 pounds. It is possible! It's just a matter of developing new habits and then maintaining them.
  • g82green
    g82green Posts: 42
    I didn't know. All I knew was that I was going to try again. I had a friend who over the last several months lost over 40 pounds and she looks AMAZING now. I realized I could not change or I could change. I'm sticking with it! I'm down 4 pounds (which is a damn good start). I started and have given up so many times... I finally realized that if I hadn't given up the 1st time or the 2nd, 3rd, .... 10th... I would already be at my goal.

    Good luck to everybody!!!
  • Anaticula
    Anaticula Posts: 14
    This time is different for me because this time I actually care. In the past it was a well I'll try it mentality. This time I want to actually do it and lose the weight.
  • Lives2Travel
    Lives2Travel Posts: 682 Member
    I think everyone has self doubt. I sure do. And like you, I've lost weight before and gained it all right back (those homing pounds are killers). But, I also have hope. Hope that I'm smarter and more self aware than I was last time. Hope that I've learned to forgive my failures and move past them. Hope that my current determination and momentum will carry me through the hard days.

    One day at a time is cliche to some, but a mantra for me. Today, I will stay within my calorie goals. Today, I will get off the couch and take a long walk. Today, I will resist those Hershey's Kisses that are staring me down from the kitchen counter. I hope I can do all these things again tomorrow, but today I know I will.
  • imcubed01
    imcubed01 Posts: 12 Member
    All of our stories sound so much alike. The biggest think I think I have found is to stay away from the word FAILURE. Mixing it up is good because your body get used to things quickly. You have to have a few TREAT days, but have to do the research for the best treat. You have to know it is ok if you do not do what you expect on a day, but have the will to get back on track tomorrow. Never give up on you.
  • jenjen828
    jenjen828 Posts: 58 Member
    This time is different for me because I have owned the mess I created and decided to change it. I used what typically would have been self hate, and turned it into a focus to be fit and healthy. I wrote down my goals, my former excuses and how I was going to overcome them, and I made a pact with myself to be honest with what I was trying to do. I looked at where I wanted to be and broke it down into smaller increments. I celebrate any little bit of forward motion---just not with food. This keeps me going. I am proud of myself (was not able to say that in most of my adult life), I can do way more stuff without being tired, and I feel awesome. Don't make any changes that you can not do for the long haul. If you can not sustain working out 2 hours every day, then don't do it. Find exercise that you like (or at least can tolerate until you like it) and do it consistently pushing yourself to go harder. I track my fitness goals and just seeing progress is a great thing. I think the main thing is that you have to be willing to do what it takes....log food into MFP, educate yourself, be willing to try some new things just to see if you like it (food, exercise, a change in a habit or two--if you like it keep it up, if not, ditch it and try something else), and just have fun. Don't look at exercise as punishment for being overweight or overeating. Do not use your diet to punish yourself either. Just make healthy choices because you love you. Keeping it positive keeps me going.
  • 40andFindingFitness
    40andFindingFitness Posts: 497 Member
    This time is different for me because I have owned the mess I created and decided to change it.

    Pretty close to this. ^^ I just got tired of making excuses and got up and started moving.
  • bulbadoof
    bulbadoof Posts: 1,058 Member
    I know for a fact this time isn't different. I'm the same person with the same weaknesses and I am just as likely to fail. However, this time I am aware of my weaknesses and I have had a couple failures under my belt to analyze and understand how they happened. Now I see them coming, and I can mentally prepare myself ahead of time.

    Don't be afraid to fail. Every great success has a ton of failures behind it. As long as you learn from your mistakes and keep trying, you'll succeed. Maybe you'll succeed this time, which would be great! Maybe it won't be this time, and that's okay too. As long as you don't give up and keep learning from your mistakes, you'll reach your goals.
  • schonsdragon
    schonsdragon Posts: 102 Member
    This I am taking things slower getting used to each change before adding another change. I am listening to my body better and if something isn't working with it I try to figure why and change it to something that will work. Every change I make has to be something that I can continue the rest of my life. I am working at making these healthy changes a habit so they are just part of my day to replace my bad habits because motivation will only last so long but habits keep you going.
  • Mr_Knight
    Mr_Knight Posts: 9,532 Member
    I am determined to lose weight but I can't stop the voice in my mind that is wondering if I'll fail this time as well...

    MFP is actually a lot like WW, only even more responsibility lands directly on the weight-loser. You need to understand why the previous attempts failed, the reasons will be a bit different for everyone. Only you can answer that for yourself.
  • Holly_Roman_Empire
    Holly_Roman_Empire Posts: 4,440 Member
    Back in 2011 when I decided to change my lifestyle, I knew calorie counting was the only way to do it. The simple equation of calories out > calories in is what made it different for me. All of the common myths of weight loss were in my head, (must eat breakfast, don't eat carbs, etc) and once I realized that I didn't have to follow rules, everything fell into place for me.
  • Tabbitha1968
    Tabbitha1968 Posts: 41 Member
    I am determined to lose weight but I can't stop the voice in my mind that is wondering if I'll fail this time as well...

    MFP is actually a lot like WW, only even more responsibility lands directly on the weight-loser. You need to understand why the previous attempts failed, the reasons will be a bit different for everyone. Only you can answer that for yourself.

    Understanding the reason why the previous attempts have failed is the key. This time around I decided that i would not give up when the scale doesnt move. I will have the patience to not give up on myself because things aren't going the way I would like. It has made the biggest difference and is the determining factor of success and failure.
  • noiradle
    noiradle Posts: 5
    You can't fail at losing weight. It's a matter of calories in and out.

    Keep that in mind. The only thing that can stop you from being fitter and healthier is you.
  • nancybuss
    nancybuss Posts: 1,461 Member
    I'm making things different in my life now with Personal Development. Different books (on dvd while driving) motivational items, changing my Internal Thinking (THIS IS HUGE) that I CAN do it and why NOT me. Oh the old, personal put-downs happen first (both weight and other things in life) but I'm pushing back and creating a Better Me overall.

    Join in!!! I know you CAN too !
    Nancy
  • JakiDee
    JakiDee Posts: 43 Member
    This time is different because I am not doing it to look "better. I am doing it to feel better.
  • Joanne_happygramma
    Joanne_happygramma Posts: 207 Member
    For me these might be the reasons it's working. I am refusing to let things get in the way. I am doing it smarter and slower than ever before. This is my first time in my weight loss history (a very long one) that I have recorded steady downs every single week. I have many good friends here that cheer me on and I LOVE seeing them succeed.
    Just NEVER give up on yourself - you are the only one that can do this and go as much as possible to the Success Stories board
    they inspire me - I want to be one of those people someday (I hope I learn how to post pictures by then :laugh: )
    I am worth this work and so are you - one of my new friends inspired me with a great mantra yesterday. Even if you eat something
    that you "feel" you shouldn't LOG it. So EAT IT - LOG IT!!!
    Cheers to your success.
  • LVCeltGirl
    LVCeltGirl Posts: 473
    Every day I have to remind myself that this is different because I'm changing the way I eat and the way I exercise. I'm eating the right portions, I need to track it for my own well-being and fast food is a treat not the norm (that last one is especially hard because I have an 8 year son who is blessed with an awesome metabolism even for 8 years old so he of course wants fast food, luckily he also likes his veggies).

    The mind isn't as smart as we'd all like to think. Find your mantra (the one that makes this time different) and stick with it. Tell yourself out loud that mantra at least every morning and every night. I've found that after 30 days of repeating the mantra morning and night, I've tricked my mind and I believe it (I don't know when along that 30 days journey it actually happens but after 30 days, it's happened). I'm actually currently working on this for attitude. Retraining myself to answer the question "How are you doing?" with "GREAT!" instead of "Fine" or "Okay". Amazing what that "GREAT!" attitude will do for you and where you're going. It's the same for overcoming the doubt.

    My next one will be finding the right mantra for eating and/or exercise. I figured I needed the attitude adjustment more right now.
  • KANGOOJUMPS
    KANGOOJUMPS Posts: 6,474 Member
    GOOD LUCK!
    BE STRONG AND CONQUER
  • baldmitch
    baldmitch Posts: 90 Member
    Self doubt? Not so much for me as self-sabotage.

    If I had to guess, I'd say that failure in diet and failure in exercise are similar in my own personal history in fundamentalist churches and failures in sin. "The best way to get rid of temptation is to give in to it."

    The moment I saw that my sedentary lifestyle, my poor diet choices, and a veritable potpourri of self-destructive behavior was killing me, I gained a renewed sense of self-responsibility. And when you start positively addressing responsibility to yourself, little things like self-respect and self worth start taking root and blossoming, because you started taking out the weeds of self-doubt, self-loathing, and self-destruction.

    For some of us starting down this path in middle age, we were probably like addicts who needed to hit rock bottom first.
  • 33Freya
    33Freya Posts: 468 Member
    The definition of insanity is said to be doing the same thing over and over while expecting the same result.

    What are you going to do differently this time? Instead of dieting, this time I have decided to make some permanent changes.

    I am avoiding processed foods, keeping track of calories (because it's SO easy to over eat and drink too many calories), and moving more.

    You have to decide and determine if it is going to be different this time. It's completely up to you. Make permanent, sustainable changes! Good luck to you- you can do this. :flowerforyou:
  • KBP1025
    KBP1025 Posts: 18 Member
    Why is this time different? Because before, if I worked really hard and gained a pound, I would of gotten frustrated and gave up. Now I know it's normal and weight loss is weird and it's up and down and as long as the general trend is going down, I'm good.

    Before, I would of freaked by invitations to parties, eating out at "bad" restaurants and told myself that I have too many social obligations going on that it would hinder weight loss. Now, I understand that I can go out and enjoy myself (in moderation) and get back to it at the next meal or day. I don't have to let 1 meal or party completely derail me. I just keep going.

    The Sunday before Thanksgiving, I weighted 165.5, the Sunday after Thanksgiving, I weighed 168. Before, I would of thrown in the towel. But this time I didn't. This time I knew to get back up and get back to it. The following Sunday? 162.5! I would of missed that. Before, I would of thrown the towel in when the scale moved up to 168 and I would of slowly gained weight again. But this time? Nope, I'm pushing for 50 lbs loss for Christmas!
  • bjohnsonwestern
    bjohnsonwestern Posts: 2 Member
    I did several things that made this weight loss journey different:

    First- I went to the doctor and had a complete blood work up. I was shocked when I discovered my cholesterol numbers and knew I had to do something. Now my doctor is working with me on my path to better health.

    The second was the hardest and most effective thing I have ever done. I told my husband how much I weighed- 250 lb. I was so humiliated when I saw that number on the scale and was terrified to let the truth be known. My husband has always been supportive of me and has loved me at every weight I have been during our marriage. This time I knew I could not do it alone....I had to tell him so he would help me keep the goodies out of the house. It was so liberating to share my weight with him. For the first tie in my life, I had a partner in this and he has helped me through every pound lost.

    The next thing I did was to start recording my food on MFP. For the first 2 weeks, I simply recorded every bit of food and did not diet. I was shocked by the poor nutritional food choices I was making and how my snacking added so many calories. I was able to make healthier choices and the diary keeps me focused. Weight watchers did not have the same effect for me, as unlimited fruits and veggies were still adding up to some major calories. I love fruit and was eating way too much on WW.

    The last thing I added was also humiliating to some degree- EXERCISE. When I first started I could only do 5 minutes on the treadmill. Each week, I added one more exercise goal. Sometimes it was as simple as adding one more minute to the treadmill. I purchased a fitbit in July and that has really motivated me to get in my daily steps and stairs. Now I go to the gym at least 3 days per week and walk on the treadmill every single day.

    My fitness journey started January 2013 and to date I have lost 72 pounds. I have 28 more to go but the journey will never be over. I will always have to watch what I eat and exercise will continue to be a daily event, but I feel healthier and stronger which is a huge motivator.

    You can do this- one step at a time---one decision at a time----learning from success and failure----on to a better and fitter you!!!!
  • KBP1025
    KBP1025 Posts: 18 Member
    I did several things that made this weight loss journey different:

    First- I went to the doctor and had a complete blood work up. I was shocked when I discovered my cholesterol numbers and knew I had to do something. Now my doctor is working with me on my path to better health.

    The second was the hardest and most effective thing I have ever done. I told my husband how much I weighed- 250 lb. I was so humiliated when I saw that number on the scale and was terrified to let the truth be known. My husband has always been supportive of me and has loved me at every weight I have been during our marriage. This time I knew I could not do it alone....I had to tell him so he would help me keep the goodies out of the house. It was so liberating to share my weight with him. For the first tie in my life, I had a partner in this and he has helped me through every pound lost.

    The next thing I did was to start recording my food on MFP. For the first 2 weeks, I simply recorded every bit of food and did not diet. I was shocked by the poor nutritional food choices I was making and how my snacking added so many calories. I was able to make healthier choices and the diary keeps me focused. Weight watchers did not have the same effect for me, as unlimited fruits and veggies were still adding up to some major calories. I love fruit and was eating way too much on WW.

    The last thing I added was also humiliating to some degree- EXERCISE. When I first started I could only do 5 minutes on the treadmill. Each week, I added one more exercise goal. Sometimes it was as simple as adding one more minute to the treadmill. I purchased a fitbit in July and that has really motivated me to get in my daily steps and stairs. Now I go to the gym at least 3 days per week and walk on the treadmill every single day.

    My fitness journey started January 2013 and to date I have lost 72 pounds. I have 28 more to go but the journey will never be over. I will always have to watch what I eat and exercise will continue to be a daily event, but I feel healthier and stronger which is a huge motivator.

    You can do this- one step at a time---one decision at a time----learning from success and failure----on to a better and fitter you!!!!

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