Commenting on a persons weight loss.

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  • micheleb15
    micheleb15 Posts: 1,418 Member
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    These people are not strangers. They have known me for years. Not close family or friends but they still know me very well.

    I for one was always raised to be happy for others if you notice positive changes in them. If someone I knew ran into me and I had heard they lost a lot of weight, when I saw them I would comment on it. No problems and I would greet them with a smile.

    Maybe the people that are not commenting are just not happy with themselves.

    Or sometimes saying something about someone's weight comes off as "Hey, you're not fat anymore, congrats!".
  • sfbaumgarten
    sfbaumgarten Posts: 912 Member
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    :huh: Wow...
  • 1PatientBear
    1PatientBear Posts: 2,089 Member
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    So basically if 9 out of 10 people are happy for someone, but then that 1 person won't even say nice job, then that is mature behavior on their part? Treat others the way you want to be treated. And they wonder why they are miserable.

    Instead of focusing on the one person who didn't say something, focus on the nine who did. Jeez man. You're really working hard to find a reason to be hacked off.
  • Calliope610
    Calliope610 Posts: 3,775 Member
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    Why do so people not comment on another's obvious weight loss? Probably because they have learned they hard way you can't win for losing.

    Some people get offended when you comment on their weight loss b/c it implies that they were fat, ugly, ad nausum. Some people get offended when you don't comment on their weight loss b/c it implies you just don't care. It is safest to keep quiet. :huh:
  • Rage_Phish
    Rage_Phish Posts: 1,507 Member
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    So basically if 9 out of 10 people are happy for someone, but then that 1 person won't even say nice job, then that is mature behavior on their part? Treat others the way you want to be treated. And they wonder why they are miserable.

    this cant be a real thread
  • Mr_Bad_Example
    Mr_Bad_Example Posts: 2,403 Member
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    There might just be the off chance that there are other things going on in other people's lives that, to them, are bigger and more important than someone who has lost weight.

    If you're upset because not everyone is fawning and congratulating you, that's something you might want to make your next goal to work on.
  • stephenryan758
    stephenryan758 Posts: 72 Member
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    At Michele.........

    You know what is ironic about this whole situation?

    The people that do not give comments are the ones that used your weight against you when they could. The ones that do give compliments are the ones that never did.
  • KarenJanine
    KarenJanine Posts: 3,497 Member
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    My weight my business, your weight your business.

    Weight loss shouldn't require the validation from others, it's a personal thing.
  • dressagester
    dressagester Posts: 53 Member
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    I never comment on a person's weight unless they have shared with me their goals to improve their health.How would I know they aren't battling an illness and their weight loss is unplanned?

    Are you losing weight for your health or for the compliments? Personally I'd rather no one comment on my losses. It's just a reminder of how I let myself get to the place where I needed to lose weight.
  • keeptehpeace
    keeptehpeace Posts: 189 Member
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    this is an oddly specific situation and since we don't know your history with this person, I can only assume that they've not been very nice to you in the past so in response you've decided to weirdly anonymously call them out on a public forum - where they will never find out about it - because you were expecting them to suddenly compliment you now that you've lost weight. The world does not revolve around you, and maybe that person knows it.
  • runitskat
    runitskat Posts: 30
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    It sounds like you lost weight just to throw it in everyone's face to get back at anyone who's said anything mean about you. And it's not going to well. Good luck with that.
  • Rage_Phish
    Rage_Phish Posts: 1,507 Member
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    At Michele.........

    You know what is ironic about this whole situation?

    The people that do not give comments are the ones that used your weight against you when they could. The ones that do give compliments are the ones that never did.

    in your experience i guess. But based off your previous posts im guessing you have imagined some of these slights against you.
  • KrazyDaizy
    KrazyDaizy Posts: 815 Member
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    Heeeeeeeeyyyyy! I just noticed no one congratulated you on your weight loss here! Great job your body is looking fit!


    Now let's work on your mind, mmmmkay. Not everyone is going to say something, just move on...it probably really doesn't have anything to do with you as to why they didn't say anything.
  • micheleb15
    micheleb15 Posts: 1,418 Member
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    At Michele.........

    You know what is ironic about this whole situation?

    The people that do not give comments are the ones that used your weight against you when they could. The ones that do give compliments are the ones that never did.

    People suck. The sooner you realize that the better off you will be. You made a decision to better yourself, good for you. You don't need reassurance from anyone else.

    Edited to add - life is much easier when you concentrate on the other 9 instead of the 1.
  • stephenryan758
    stephenryan758 Posts: 72 Member
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    What I never understood is why someone would be upset if someone said "Wow you are not fat anymore."

    Isn't that the whole point to eating better and working out? To not be as fat as you once were?
  • AwesomelyAmber
    AwesomelyAmber Posts: 1,617 Member
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    I get what you are trying to say. It is super awesome when people do voice their congrats and such... and it does make you pause a second when people whom you KNOW notice say nothing. You simply cannot let it get to you. Probably more THEM than YOU.

    and yes, some people are nervous to comment on the changes that others make for themselves for not knowing what the response will be.

    I live with the pleasure (for myself) of telling people when they look good, whether it's weight loss, a nice shirt, cute haircut, whatever it may be. No matter how THEY feel about the COMPLIMENT... giving the compliment makes my day brighter. To each their own.
  • Levesque_7
    Levesque_7 Posts: 104
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    Cause its annoying to think about why people would be jealous enough to not comment on someones weight? How old are we here? 10? I'm not better than anyone but this is how I feel.......... Say a person walks in a room and 9 people say "Wow you look great! You lost a lot of weight."

    Then you have that one person who won't even say hi to you. As an adult that behavior comes off as "How dare everyone give him attention and not me!"

    Very childish and immature.

    sorry but it sounds like YOU are the one saying "how dare everyone not give me ALL the attention". Sounds childish on your part and need constant reassurance. who cares what they think? grow up
  • biggsterjackster
    biggsterjackster Posts: 419 Member
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    Do you really need these compliments? What difference does it make. You lose weight for yourself, not for others.
  • sassyjae21
    sassyjae21 Posts: 1,217 Member
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    Why would you expect people to comment or congratulate you? I'm not saying it's a bad thing that people do so, I just don't understand why do you believe people should congratulate you. I personally don't like it when people comment about my weight loss... don't like it and don't need it.

    This.

    So much. Who cares? If it's that important that you get compliments you have other issues
  • dressagester
    dressagester Posts: 53 Member
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    this is an oddly specific situation and since we don't know your history with this person, I can only assume that they've not been very nice to you in the past so in response you've decided to weirdly anonymously call them out on a public forum - where they will never find out about it - because you were expecting them to suddenly compliment you now that you've lost weight. The world does not revolve around you, and maybe that person knows it.

    I think you're on to something here.

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