Going on a date with someone I'm not interested in?

Options
bd0027
bd0027 Posts: 1,053 Member
in Chit-Chat
This guy keeps asking me out and I keep making up excuses as to why I can't go on a date with him. He's a very nice guy but I'm not really feeling him like he's feeling me.

He's asked me multiple times, and I'm starting to feel bad for rejecting his offer so often. Should I be nice and agree to a date but tell him that we'll go dutch on all expenses or just break the news to him that I'm not interested?
«1345

Replies

  • FTIM2015
    FTIM2015 Posts: 460 Member
    Options
    I've been on dates with guys who I wasn't overly interested in, I was bored senseless!

    My advice, don't bother x
  • ZeroDarkThirty86
    ZeroDarkThirty86 Posts: 1
    Options
    Don't do it, because it gives them hope when there isn't any. Then he starts to bother you even more because there's that glimmer of hope. I know from experience.
  • Sinisterly
    Sinisterly Posts: 10,913 Member
    Options
    Tell him "I'm sorry, I can't." And that's that.
  • HawkeyeTy
    HawkeyeTy Posts: 681 Member
    Options
    I would tell him that you're not interested, and will never be.


    It's simple.
  • lawmama_
    lawmama_ Posts: 103 Member
    Options
    I felt that same way about a guy i went to law school with. I knew he was SO into me and I just didn't feel like he was my type. I ended up marrying him and we have a baby on the way. I say go on that date, because you really never know!
  • BeachGingerOnTheRocks
    BeachGingerOnTheRocks Posts: 3,927 Member
    Options
    Be a little bit more obvious in your excuses. Don't give the guy any hope.

    Some people will kill you with persistence.
  • SimoneBee12
    SimoneBee12 Posts: 268 Member
    Options
    I definitely agree about not giving him that sense of hope by saying yes.

    I would just sit him down and tell him honestly, you don't feel it, and it's never going to happen.

    If he's so nice, you want him to find someone that can actually love him, and not be stuck on you for ages.
  • BrainyBurro
    BrainyBurro Posts: 6,129 Member
    Options
    tell him you can't because you're moving to yemen.

    tumblr_mrzqycHCXR1rb97lyo3_250.gif
  • ChrissyC1985
    ChrissyC1985 Posts: 406 Member
    Options
    Be a little bit more obvious in your excuses. Don't give the guy any hope.

    Some people will kill you with persistence.

    one I heard recently that I thought was brilliant was " I have to alphabetize my tee-shirts"
    now if that's not obvious I don't know what is.I'm sure I can come up with a few more like that if you want.
  • bd0027
    bd0027 Posts: 1,053 Member
    Options
    I don't want to hurt his feelings but I don't want to lead him on. That's why I suggested that I go on the date but pay for my part of it. I feel bad.
  • Sinisterly
    Sinisterly Posts: 10,913 Member
    Options
    I don't want to hurt his feelings but I don't want to lead him on. That's why I suggested that I go on the date but pay for my part of it. I feel bad.
    This used to be my problem.
    You will get sucked in if you don't address it now that you're ahead.

    Get him out of your life now, before he gets more entangled in it.

    Fixed typo.
  • tastethis
    tastethis Posts: 68 Member
    Options
    Just tell him you're not interested in being anything other than his friend, and that his advances make you uncomfortable. Sometimes being too nice just doesn't work!
  • herblackwings39
    herblackwings39 Posts: 3,930 Member
    Options
    Honesty is probably your best bet. If you keep making up excuses he'll keep asking or key into the fact that you're lying to blow him off and that will hurt him.
  • Sinisterly
    Sinisterly Posts: 10,913 Member
    Options
    People like direct talk. A lot of people, not all, but many, think talking like that is being rude.

    FIFY. :smile:
    It's not a gender thing, it's a people thing.
  • bd0027
    bd0027 Posts: 1,053 Member
    Options
    The last time I was honest with a guy about not being interested, he called me ugly and fat lol. I'm not too good at this.
  • Sinisterly
    Sinisterly Posts: 10,913 Member
    Options
    The last time I was honest with a guy about not being interested, he called me ugly and fat lol. I'm not too good at this.
    That's called he was butthurt.

    If you were "ugly and fat", he would not be pursuing you in the first place. He reeked of rejection. Just laugh and move on.


    Typos.
  • bd0027
    bd0027 Posts: 1,053 Member
    Options
    The last time I was honest with a guy about not being interested, he called me ugly and fat lol. I'm not too good at this.
    That's called he was butthurt.

    If you were "ugly and fat", he would not be pursuing you in the first place. He reeked of rejection. Just laugh and move on.


    Typos.

    I did haha. It was his loss.
  • Sinisterly
    Sinisterly Posts: 10,913 Member
    Options
    The last time I was honest with a guy about not being interested, he called me ugly and fat lol. I'm not too good at this.
    That's called he was butthurt.

    If you were "ugly and fat", he would not be pursuing you in the first place. He reeked of rejection. Just laugh and move on.


    Typos.

    I did haha. It was his loss.
    TOTALLY!
    Just tell the dude you're not into him. If he wants to be friends.. Cool. That's where you draw your line.
    Don't feel bad, be blunt.
  • bearkisses
    bearkisses Posts: 1,252 Member
    Options
    well, what's wrong with him, why AREN'T you interested in him.

Categories