fifty shades of grey

I read the trilogy on vacation. It was hard for me to like the first one because the mere thought of being a submissive for anyone made me angry, (plus I think it was written for simple minds) but then I really liked the idea of HAVING a submissive, then I read the second and liked it better. I read the third because, well I just did........

Had I not been on vacation with my husband I probably would have been angry about spending the money on them. But there were times that it did work to my advantage.

Thing about being a sub really is that you hold the power, you set your own hard and soft limits, you can give or withold your safe word the dom wants to make you give the safe word and will see how far they can push to make you. You get to play and see how far you can make them go to make you use your safe word. The doms only think they have the upper hand...

I would say experienced doms "know" they don't have the upper hand..but then again, I don't feel that subs do either. I'd more say it comes down to a relationship based on equal responsibility and trust. Really a give and take on both sides.

I read the trilogy on vacation. It was hard for me to like the first one because the mere thought of being a submissive for anyone made me angry, (plus I think it was written for simple minds) but then I really liked the idea of HAVING a submissive, then I read the second and liked it better. I read the third because, well I just did........

Had I not been on vacation with my husband I probably would have been angry about spending the money on them. But there were times that it did work to my advantage.

Thing about being a sub really is that you hold the power, you set your own hard and soft limits, you can give or withold your safe word the dom wants to make you give the safe word and will see how far they can push to make you. You get to play and see how far you can make them go to make you use your safe word. The doms only think they have the upper hand...

I understand what you are saying but I still can not wrap my head around someone telling me what to do. I think this is the reason my husband married me. He can be controlling and domineering, he tried that crap with me and I told him to go f*&^ himself. He absolutely loves and hates that I am independent and do not allow anyone to run over me.

Although I do not mind a good spankin every once and a while.

If you hated it so much why did you keep reading? That's like someone who sends a meal back at a restaurant after they've eaten 90% of it, lol.

I didn't keep reading it. I picked up the book out of morbid curiosity, as it was on sale in the remnants bin at my local library for 2$.

I got to the scene where Anastasia lost her virginity to Christian, and she had three orgasms. I flung the book across the room, and called bull****. I don't care who you are, nobody believes that tripe.

Oh, and the writing hurt my brain. Bad grammar, bad sentence structure, bad research, repeaated use of "OH MY!!!!:" and lip-biting. I could go on, but I didn't even make it halfway through the book before giving up. Life's too short to read bad fan-fiction.

Not at all. I'm not even fully committed to the lifestyle. I just don't like it when total vanilla people make comments like "omg why do you have freaking weird toys, that wrong" and then read 50 Shade and all of a sudden forget about your freaky toys, "omg I love s&m it's hot."

Why are all these people seeing your sex toys?

:laugh: Inquiring minds want to know!!

I read the trilogy on vacation. It was hard for me to like the first one because the mere thought of being a submissive for anyone made me angry, (plus I think it was written for simple minds) but then I really liked the idea of HAVING a submissive, then I read the second and liked it better. I read the third because, well I just did........

Had I not been on vacation with my husband I probably would have been angry about spending the money on them. But there were times that it did work to my advantage.

Thing about being a sub really is that you hold the power, you set your own hard and soft limits, you can give or withold your safe word the dom wants to make you give the safe word and will see how far they can push to make you. You get to play and see how far you can make them go to make you use your safe word. The doms only think they have the upper hand...

I would say experienced doms "know" they don't have the upper hand..but then again, I don't feel that subs do either. I'd more say it comes down to a relationship based on equal responsibility and trust. Really a give and take on both sides.

Exactly. Most of the people who claim that one or the other person have an upper hand aren't grasping the overall concept. It's not as simple as that and never will be in terms of a D/s relationship, perhaps in pure Top/bottom play.

Also, the original suggestion that all Dom's are trying to get a sub to safe word is 100% false. They push your limits and the safe word is in place for *cough* "safety", go figure.

Yes I was oversimplistic and possibly control would be a better word than power but a dom does want to see how far they can push you within your limits and I know plenty of Doms who would admit that a sub using a safe word gives them a buzz. These people know the rules and I am not talking about abusing limits here but they like making a sub use it.

And truly yes it is about balance and trust but it's too easy to think that a Dom has all the power and control when in reality it is at least as much in the Subs hands as the Doms.

Lesa Sass it's not the controlling or domineering, believe me nobody gets to try that carp with me either. But when my OH was giving me a bit of grief about something and I stuck out my tongue so he said if you do that again I will spank you, so I did, and he did and I stuck my tongue out again and again and again at him. This sort of power play is more of a turn on than any of the 50 junk, who will stop first? how hard will he spank me this time? will I do it again? should I back off?

Never read it

I think it's a little too tame, I like Shayla Black's books a lot better!

I haven't yet made my mind up on it.