body dysmorphia sorta

This seems to be very common. I have heard this story before and I have lived this story also. My loss has slowed significantly over the last six months but have lost a total of 135-140 pounds since Feb 2012, with about 15-20 to go....and sometimes I still catch my reflection in the mirror and am surprised by what I see.
This too shall pass--dont doubt your success to date. Good luck on your continued success.

Nothing to do with the angle of the camera darling, you have lost a lot of weight and I can see it very clearly!! Amazingly done!! I lost only half of what you have couple of years ago and in some point I swear I was freaking out, it was like: who is this person??!! Like I was scared of losing my identity or something. It did pass with coming weeks and now it seems like a far away memory. I'm sure it is all perfectly normal because it is a huge change after all.

So keep going, girl! You're doing great! You'll get used to your new shape!

Hello Dami!

First of all I want to say: Congratulations!
You really have done a great journey, and there is lots of success viewable. I'm proud of you! It must have meant lots of work.

I hope it's okay that I leave a few assumptions here. Maybe you can use them, maybe they don't suit your situation at all. I'll give it a try anyway.

See it this way: You always "knew" what was holding you back- your fat. You had something you could blame, you had something you could hate, you had something you could use as your excuse.

And now you're getting to the point where you have to question something you never questioned your whole life: Is is really the weight that has been the problem?

It's because you're getting closer to the point where you would actually overcome this point and you would have to realize, that it is NOT your fat, what is holding you back. You yourself are!
'being fat' itself isn't that horrible and it propably is neither the reason you hate yourself nor it is a reason for things you were denying yourself. And (just my personal assumption) I think this is the point where you have to go on.

While it's easy to discredit yourself and to make yourself feel bad for having done something not good enough, it's quite hard to acknowledge that you have actually achieved something (which, you obviously did!)
How to be proud of something? It's an unusual situation and you do what you are used to do:
You try to find reasons why your "success" is not a success after all.
Because that's all you are used to: Talk yourself bad.

It is not about losing weight. If it was until today, this is the moment where it changes. It is not about your weight.
This is about you. This is about why you are a lovely person full of worth, awesomeness and you deserve to be loved by others AND you deserve to love yourself. The last part is the important one.
You deserve to love yourself.

Your body is not an enemy you have to fight against.
Try to figure out what you are REALLY scared of. What are your real feelings? What do you feel for yourself (or against yourself), what can you change (if you want to), what is holding you back?
Treat yourself the way you deserve to be treated- in the very best way.

You really are not crazy at all, it's a common problem many people fight with. And I guess, because this problem is not a conscious one, that's a reason why many people who are sucessfull at first start struggling.

You have come very far, but the real fight will not be to continue losing weight or to maintain the weight; the real fight will be the one in your head. To change your attitude towards yourself. Because you DESERVE this!

I hope maybe at least one or two points apply to you so that it can be helpful in some way.
Good luck!

i no exactly how you feel
i go clothes shopping and pick bigger sizes up because the size that i am couldn't possibly fit me,
i was that scared that i was going to regain all my weight, that i kept all my bigger clothes for over 2 years
i was a higher weight than you was when i started and had far more confidence at that weight than i do now, i used to be quite flirty and just generally fun, but now i try to make myself as invisible as possible
if i buy any sort of figure hugging clothes i ask my family a 100 times if i look ok, not because i'm fishing for compliments but because i'm paranoid that i'm going to be laughed at and ridiculed
i wish i could make it all go away for you and tell you it gets better, but it's something that we have to get over for ourselves and at the minute i'm the same as you and the smaller i get the worse it seems to get

but you can see for yourself the difference in your pictures, you are looking fantastic and are doing an incredible job

good luck with everything x