Putting a child on MFP
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I've been on this site since I was 15. I haven't had any issues being unhealthy (anorexic, etc.) and this site has taught me to go for healthy and not skinny. I think if they're 14 or older, it's appropriate. This site has helped me not become obese like most of my family.0
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Not sure if there is one in your area, but if they are already in a run club, there's a program called Girls on the Run for elementary girls and Girls on Track for middle schoolers. It's a curriculum about goal setting, positive body image, nutrition, and athletic improvement. Parents get a booklet along with the girls. The coaches and girls all talk before or after practice about a topic and the parents can ask follow up questions from their book when they get home. The girls also train to run a 5K over a course of 12-15 weeks I think. The spring season is starting now. Online registration in my area opened last night and they adjust the cost of the program based on your income. My oldest daughter does not have a weight problem, but is doing the program because I think it sets a really good example for girls and touches on topics like not comparing yourself to women in magazines and focusing on what you can accomplish with your body. You can find out if there's one in your area at www.girlsontherun.org. Or you could consider signing the family up for a Color Run in your area. They're great for beginners and lots of people take the whole family out. It's not timed and focuses on FUN!
I don't know if MFP is right for children and I tend to err on the side of caution with mine. You could show them the tools you use to give them examples of what they're eating. Like using the barcode scanner on a snack to let them see the nutritional values of some of the things they are putting into their bodies. Idk. It's a tough one, but at least you're looking for ways to improve the overall health of your family! Best of luck
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If your kids are still growing, they probably don't need to actually lose weight, as their current weight will look good on them as they grow. They just need to eat healthy and move around.
Kids are really the ideal audience for "lifestyle diets" like South Beach, Sonoma or Mediterranean. They can fill up on proteins and veggies, with occasional fruits and grains. You can work on teaching them what a serving size is, but don't get them into tracking and weighing everything. Be sure to include treats in that lifestyle, so that they aren't gorging themselves when they are out of the house to make up for feeling deprived at home. My nieces and nephews have never complained about the cookies I make with less sugar, whole wheat flour and when I use chocolate it is as dark as I can find.
DO NOT sign your kids up for MFP: they have different nutritional needs and are exposed to a lot of stupidity on the boards: even if they aren't active, they will likely receive personal messages, be friended by people with eating disorders, etc. Furthermore, if you need a journal to keep yourself honest, lying about your age is a horrible place to start!0 -
first off, no doctor should ever give you or your children the "evil eye" as you put it. That culture of fat shaming and ignorance about how to deal with weight status, especially in children by physicians only makes matters worse. I will tell you this much, in general, doctors know very little about weight, weight loss, and obesity. They are taught almost nothing regarding nutrition in med school and nothing regarding physical activity.
Children grow at incredibly rapid and unpredictable rates. to classify them as obese (or fat) does nothing but cause harm.
I'm all for children increasing their food literacy, understanding how food works. My concern is that children are also impressionable and could take things too seriously. Especially young girls who are at far more risk for body image issues. I fear if they hear fat or carbs are bad, they might take that to the extreme and try to eliminate them all together and lead to eating disorders, or something along that line.
I would also be worried about them being influenced by the social side of this site, there is an awful lot of terrible and non science based information spouted in here and not to mention that much of the good info on here is not relevant to children.
If you want children to learn about food I believe your best bet would be to lead by example, talk to them about it, include them in meal prep (could have your children pick a new healthy meal a week and help them shop for it and make it) look into information regarding food and healthy lifestyles for children (contact me if you wish).
If you think they are ok to use the food tracking on this I would have a few key recommendations. 1. only let them track food, no forums etc. 2. MAKE SURE THAT NONE OF THEIR GOALS ARE DIRECTED TOWARDS WEIGHT. girls already face enough crap out there about how they should look or how much they should weigh and its all crap. Teach your children that they are beautiful, strong individuals. Make sure they know that their weight in reality means nothing, it does not define their health and it does not define them as individuals.
If you can begin to teach your children about living an active healthy lifestyle full of home cooking and whole foods without a hint of focus on their weight, you will be setting them up for a very successful future.0 -
I don't think kids need to be calorie counting. In general, calorie counting can lead to a lot of disordered thinking and OCD behavior...and this is with "mature" adults (I'm about 18 at heart). At least as adults we are responsible for the path we choose...I just think you're going to **** a kid's head having them do anythign like this at such a young age.
At this point I think it's better to just lead by example. My kids are young...18 months and 4 y.o....but my eldest remembers me fat and he has seen how I've changed my life around..and he's proud of me and I'm proud of the example I'm setting for him. We spend good quality family time now eating nutritious scratch meals that I prepare on a regular basis...we go out for walks and recreational bike rides and I otherwise just make sure I get outside to play with both of my boys.
My kiddos accompany my wife and I to the gym a couple of days per week and go to the drop in child care there...they know we're working out and doing it for our health...they actually understand stuff like that (at least my 4 y.o. does) and they get exposure...going to the gym a couple days per week is a routine activity for them...I'm hoping that will serve them well in the future.
My gym also has youth fitness classes that I enroll my eldest in. Both of my boys attend "Daddy and Me" gym time every other Sunday for an hour. You may ot find these types of things at your typical gym, but you might want to look into a Community Center...we have a family membership to the Jewish Community Center here in town and love it for all of these reasons. If not though, you can still establish these healthy habits without a gym...teach them proper nutrition and the importance of exercise and they will be fine.0 -
some of the things i see on this site.. i would NEVER allow kids to come here.. i think sparks would be better.. good luck..
Agreed!! I have a 15 y/o who is pretty health conscious. I learned of spark teen through this forum last week, I'm going to show that one to my daughter to see if she's interested.0 -
I've been on this site since I was 15. I haven't had any issues being unhealthy (anorexic, etc.) and this site has taught me to go for healthy and not skinny. I think if they're 14 or older, it's appropriate. This site has helped me not become obese like most of my family.
No, it's not appropriate.
The terms of this site are 18+.
There are a lot of weirdos on this site and putting a 5yo and 9yo here is such an idiotic idea.
Even at 14yo, it's not ok.
sparkteens.com exists for a reason.0 -
One of the OP's previous threads say the girls are 5 and 9. Way too young to be calorie counting. OP, their weights will likely come down naturally if both parents continue to model healthy eating and exercise behaviors.
Thank you for sharing that. This is WAY too young for the OP to start having children obsess over calories. This is where the parent has to step in and eliminate junk. YOU are the parent, YOU control the groceries, YOU control what goes into your children's mouths and bodies.
Now, I don't know how rebellious your kids are...if you take away chicken nuggets will they give you holy hell?? Find a better way to make fresh chicken nuggets at home.
However, from what it seems they are pretty active, so they may need more calories than kids who sit on their butts all day. Just find healthier calories.
Make sure alternative snacks are available. Also, make sure they are eating good breakfasts and lunches. My son would be ravenous (sp?) when he got home from school. Come to find out he was hating school lunches. he also doesn't really like to eat breakfast until later which is hard to do during the school year.0 -
I've been on this site since I was 15. I haven't had any issues being unhealthy (anorexic, etc.) and this site has taught me to go for healthy and not skinny. I think if they're 14 or older, it's appropriate. This site has helped me not become obese like most of my family.
You've been on here since you were 15 and judging by your other forum posts you haven't learned much from it. So maybe it wasn't the appropriate place for you to be. How on earth were you at your "goal weight" at age 16? You are still growing at that age.
It's also, once again, against the terms of service.0 -
Just keep only healthy food in the house, and cook healthy food for them0
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My two kids are fighting the same weight fight that I am. My wife and I are trying to teach them how to eat right but I fear they have the mental block about food I do. I have to keep a journal to really put a finger on my food intake and not cheat. I think my eldest is mature enough to see this and she wants to lose weight. She sees what I am doing and the changes that are happening. She is also VERY goal oriented. My youngest is not near as mature and a free spirit, but she sees her older sister as a role model.
They both dance two to three times a week, plus in are the "Run Club" at school (which equate to about a 1/2 mile a day for my youngest and a mile or so for my eldest). However, they are fat. Fat enough the doctor's give us the evil eye when we take them in for check ups (and they should).
What are your thoughts about starting children on MFP?
Age restriction is there for a reason.
As for myself, I don't want to have to be mindful of your children on this site. Sparkteens, please.0 -
I've been on this site since I was 15. I haven't had any issues being unhealthy (anorexic, etc.) and this site has taught me to go for healthy and not skinny. I think if they're 14 or older, it's appropriate. This site has helped me not become obese like most of my family.
Well whether YOU think it's appropriate or not, the people that run the site don't which is why it's 18+0 -
Does anyone know if you have to announce if someone is a registered sex offender?
I'm not, I'm just curious, for science.0 -
One of the OP's previous threads say the girls are 5 and 9. Way too young to be calorie counting. OP, their weights will likely come down naturally if both parents continue to model healthy eating and exercise behaviors.
My heart breaks that you're calling your 5yo and 9yo fat.0 -
As far as foods go, we monitor what they eat at home... but I have a problem with my in-laws and snacks. Pretty much, anything goes. We actually had to journal all my eldests foods for a month trying to see if she had a food allergy. The doc saw the "crap" journal entries and asked who allowed it. My mother in law was pretty sheepish. She told me after she was not taking the kids to the doctor again. They know it is bad and they are playing the grand parent card. However, my father-in-law also plays the "why do you need to watch what you eat" card whenever we go to their house or we talk to them on the phone. He is actively trying to derail our diets. Not really sure why. I also found out schools will allow kids to go back for seconds or thirds if they ask. I found out because a month worth of lunch money on the school account was gone in about 2 weeks. They can also buy snacks off the accounts (which is not regulated by the schools food mandate and can have all sorts of crap in it). I tried to put a stop to it but "it is not the schools job" to monitor that. So I told my kids they get one month of money and that is all they get. If they expend it early, sack lunches for the rest of the year.
I am not shirking responsibility for them. I was complacent about being fat, dumb and happy... and that extended to my kids. I am almost two months into the new me and I am not going back. I am not going to see my children be the "fat kids" at school either. My eldest is seeing how mean other kids can be, and being fat is just an easy target. My youngest is still pretty innocent of these matters but I know she sees how kids can be on the playground... even if she is not the target. Both of my kids also see the physical changes in me and my wife (she is on MFP too and doing great). They see me go out for my C25K and I try to get them to come walk with me, or even take their scooters/bikes along. I get a partner about 1 request in 3.
BTW, both of my girls are pre-teens. I was never going to allow them to hit the forums and was just going to use the "diary" portion of the program. I wanted to use it as a tool with guidance. For instance, I ate a 1/2 cup of refriend beans and had zero clue they were 200 cal?!?! A 1/2 cup of Blue Bell does not have 200 cal
That mistake won't happen again. They need to have these sorts of epiphanies with their food too. However, if the TOS say NO and the site is not designed for children... then it is a no. I had never heard of Sparkteens, so thanks for the many recommendations.
As far as the negative replies go, meh. I was asking for advice on your thoughts... not damage control for pulling the trigger and wonder what happened. If a lot of people have these sorts of questions, then you have to look at the why. What is more important though is they are looking for a solution. However, so many people see a question as an easy target. Someone asks for help with a thoughtful opinion get flames in reply. To the trolls, shame on you. To the thoughtful replies, I give you my thanks.0 -
I have the same issues you do with both of my boy's. Our family eats healthy together at home since I started mfp over a year ago and my husband and I are losing weight healthily, but my kid's are eating unhealthily at school in which we talk to them about the tools, the diabetes that runs in the family on all sides, the health issues. They are both very active in sports 7 days a week and we all lead very outdoorsie lifestyle, but that being said, they still overeat at meals and if they were to see their calorie counts and then some, they would see their habits are still over and beyond what they need to be. My in laws and hubby keep telling me they are ok, then turn around and state they are overweight, when I continue telling everyone they need to watch and not eat so much on the portion sizes and everyone needs to quit offering them more. I have tried teaching them both to keep a journal but with their ADD, it is very hard to keep them both organized already, so working on something that works. I was truly hoping having them on here would be a great benefit for them. But now seeing sparkteen.com would be a better suggestion, I am going to check that out for both of them. One is only 9 at the moment, and the other 16, but I may locate a sparkpreteen type thing for my younger one. My older one is 6 foot tall and already weighing 235 and that is not good. I knew it was coming and not one wants to heed my warnings. Even the doc says he overweight by 10-20 pounds, but that is still not good enough for the rest of my family to take it seriously. So I feel your pain.0
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One of the OP's previous threads say the girls are 5 and 9. Way too young to be calorie counting. OP, their weights will likely come down naturally if both parents continue to model healthy eating and exercise behaviors.
My heart breaks that you're calling your 5yo and 9yo fat.
Why? If they're fat they're fat. But it's NOT their fault....and it certainly should NOT be their problem.
This is 100% the parents problem. And just for the record, these kids are 5 and 9, you don't encourage them to do anything. You tell them!!
And just for the record OP, they are ABSOLUTELY NOT fighting the same fight you are. In no way is that true.
Feed them right and make sure they exercise properly.0 -
One of the OP's previous threads say the girls are 5 and 9. Way too young to be calorie counting. OP, their weights will likely come down naturally if both parents continue to model healthy eating and exercise behaviors.
My heart breaks that you're calling your 5yo and 9yo fat.
Why? If they're fat they're fat. But it's NOT their fault....and it certainly should NOT be their problem.
This is 100% the parents problem. And just for the record, these kids are 5 and 9, you don't encourage them to do anything. You tell them!!
And just for the record OP, they are ABSOLUTELY NOT fighting the same fight you are. In no way is that true.
Feed them right and make sure they exercise properly.
Just buy them a shirt:
link to more http://justas1am.blogspot.com/2011/08/aww-baby-you-just-look-darling-in-your.html0 -
As far as foods go, we monitor what they eat at home... but I have a problem with my in-laws and snacks. Pretty much, anything goes. We actually had to journal all my eldests foods for a month trying to see if she had a food allergy. The doc saw the "crap" journal entries and asked who allowed it. My mother in law was pretty sheepish. She told me after she was not taking the kids to the doctor again. They know it is bad and they are playing the grand parent card. However, my father-in-law also plays the "why do you need to watch what you eat" card whenever we go to their house or we talk to them on the phone. He is actively trying to derail our diets. Not really sure why. I also found out schools will allow kids to go back for seconds or thirds if they ask. I found out because a month worth of lunch money on the school account was gone in about 2 weeks. They can also buy snacks off the accounts (which is not regulated by the schools food mandate and can have all sorts of crap in it). I tried to put a stop to it but "it is not the schools job" to monitor that. So I told my kids they get one month of money and that is all they get. If they expend it early, sack lunches for the rest of the year.
I am not shirking responsibility for them. I was complacent about being fat, dumb and happy... and that extended to my kids. I am almost two months into the new me and I am not going back. I am not going to see my children be the "fat kids" at school either. My eldest is seeing how mean other kids can be, and being fat is just an easy target. My youngest is still pretty innocent of these matters but I know she sees how kids can be on the playground... even if she is not the target. Both of my kids also see the physical changes in me and my wife (she is on MFP too and doing great). They see me go out for my C25K and I try to get them to come walk with me, or even take their scooters/bikes along. I get a partner about 1 request in 3.
BTW, both of my girls are pre-teens. I was never going to allow them to hit the forums and was just going to use the "diary" portion of the program. I wanted to use it as a tool with guidance. For instance, I ate a 1/2 cup of refriend beans and had zero clue they were 200 cal?!?! A 1/2 cup of Blue Bell does not have 200 cal That mistake won't happen again. They need to have these sorts of epiphanies with their food too. However, if the TOS say NO and the site is not designed for children... then it is a no. I had never heard of Sparkteens, so thanks for the many recommendations.
As far as the negative replies go, meh. I was asking for advice on your thoughts... not damage control for pulling the trigger and wonder what happened. If a lot of people have these sorts of questions, then you have to look at the why. What is more important though is they are looking for a solution. However, so many people see a question as an easy target. Someone asks for help with a thoughtful opinion get flames in reply. To the trolls, shame on you. To the thoughtful replies, I give you my thanks.
Are we trolls because we disagree? You sir, need parenting help.0 -
Depends why you want them on here - I thought the app was a good idea for a friend of my wifes 16yr old son who wants to gain weight healthily.
Was disappointed to learn that the site os 18+ since I have never seen anything on here which, were it on TV would have to be put on post watershed (for non Brits - the watershed is 9pm and programmes of a more mature nature are generally broadcast after then).0 -
Sparkteens is a good website to use, like the other posters said. I think that if you are making healthy meals at home, they should start noticing how they should eat by your example. Maybe encourage them to go workout with you as well?0
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As far as foods go, we monitor what they eat at home... but I have a problem with my in-laws and snacks. Pretty much, anything goes. We actually had to journal all my eldests foods for a month trying to see if she had a food allergy. The doc saw the "crap" journal entries and asked who allowed it. My mother in law was pretty sheepish. She told me after she was not taking the kids to the doctor again. They know it is bad and they are playing the grand parent card. However, my father-in-law also plays the "why do you need to watch what you eat" card whenever we go to their house or we talk to them on the phone. He is actively trying to derail our diets. Not really sure why. I also found out schools will allow kids to go back for seconds or thirds if they ask. I found out because a month worth of lunch money on the school account was gone in about 2 weeks. They can also buy snacks off the accounts (which is not regulated by the schools food mandate and can have all sorts of crap in it). I tried to put a stop to it but "it is not the schools job" to monitor that. So I told my kids they get one month of money and that is all they get. If they expend it early, sack lunches for the rest of the year.
I am not shirking responsibility for them. I was complacent about being fat, dumb and happy... and that extended to my kids. I am almost two months into the new me and I am not going back. I am not going to see my children be the "fat kids" at school either. My eldest is seeing how mean other kids can be, and being fat is just an easy target. My youngest is still pretty innocent of these matters but I know she sees how kids can be on the playground... even if she is not the target. Both of my kids also see the physical changes in me and my wife (she is on MFP too and doing great). They see me go out for my C25K and I try to get them to come walk with me, or even take their scooters/bikes along. I get a partner about 1 request in 3.
BTW, both of my girls are pre-teens. I was never going to allow them to hit the forums and was just going to use the "diary" portion of the program. I wanted to use it as a tool with guidance. For instance, I ate a 1/2 cup of refriend beans and had zero clue they were 200 cal?!?! A 1/2 cup of Blue Bell does not have 200 cal That mistake won't happen again. They need to have these sorts of epiphanies with their food too. However, if the TOS say NO and the site is not designed for children... then it is a no. I had never heard of Sparkteens, so thanks for the many recommendations.
As far as the negative replies go, meh. I was asking for advice on your thoughts... not damage control for pulling the trigger and wonder what happened. If a lot of people have these sorts of questions, then you have to look at the why. What is more important though is they are looking for a solution. However, so many people see a question as an easy target. Someone asks for help with a thoughtful opinion get flames in reply. To the trolls, shame on you. To the thoughtful replies, I give you my thanks.
You asked a public forum about having your kids use MFP and you received multiple responses. (that does not equal troll, negative etc) You said yourself that you have been complacent and that has extended to your kids. Now that two months has passed since you and your wife have made changes, you expect everyone else to make the same changes. (kids, grandparents, school etc) All I see is projection and your fear that your kids are going to end up like you. Lead by example and have patience.0 -
You know, my dad used me being "fat" as a child (from about pre-school through middle school) as an excuse as to why I wasn't allowed to do the activities I wanted to do (racing, gymnastics, etc.)
You know what that did to me?
It convinced me that I was fat. And that if daddy thought I was fat (and he was/is overweight, too) that I would always be fat and I should just accept it. That was the start of a very long spiral into depression/bi-polar disorder.
Some kids are larger than other. Big ****ing deal.
I was the same weight from about 4th grade all the way until I graduated from HS. I got taller, I got trimmer, I was active. You know what? I was still convinced that I was fat.
If you feel that your kids need to lose weight, fine. Do not call them fat. Do not even think that way. Guess what, if you think they're fat, they know you're looking down on them. Be a parent and control their food. Reduce the amount of sweets, sodas, junk that they have access to. Feed them their dietary requirements. If you want to talk to a pediatrician and see how many calories they should be eating a day YOU plan out their calories for the day and offer them what is within their guidelines. It is NOT their problem, it is yours.
Kids grow. If your doctor is truly giving you the evil eye, and NOT recommending what you should do about it, find a new Dr. or grow up and demand that they help.0 -
This site is WAY too adult oriented...plus, it's against the rules for kids that age. However, there are some sites that offer same features, that are more oriented to kids that age. I recommend looking into some of those.0
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Please do not make a young goal-oriented girl go on this website.
Please do not make her start counting calories.
Please do not make her create a chart about her weight.
As a goal-oriented, slightly chubby girl I got hooked on those things and made them the focus of my goal, and later an obsession; being into 'challenges' and perfectionism is a personality trait had by many anorexics and if she already has a predisposition, being told by her own parents that she is 'too fat' and to count calories could be the start on a path you don't want her to walk down.
I mean, she might be so pleased she beat her calorie goal that she lowers it, and then her target weight, and then again and again and again until she ends up in hospital just like I did
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I think you should check out that teen site. I do however think it is amazing that you are taking a very active role in this issue. I am sure your oldest can lead by example. They have to want to do it and you can not push it on them. It sounds like they are quite active. Another way without them having to record is only have healthy choices in the house take out all the Chocolate and Chips and Cookies. If the temptations are not there it will be easier for all of you. If you want a treat go out as a family for ice cream once and awhile everything is okay in moderation.0
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If your children don't handle buying lunches at school well, why don't you just make them lunches? I was never allowed to buy lunches at school. In fact, I had to start making my own lunches when I hit about 10 or so. I made the same sort of stuff my mom made (took leftovers or made sandwiches).As far as foods go, we monitor what they eat at home... but I have a problem with my in-laws and snacks. Pretty much, anything goes. We actually had to journal all my eldests foods for a month trying to see if she had a food allergy. The doc saw the "crap" journal entries and asked who allowed it. My mother in law was pretty sheepish. She told me after she was not taking the kids to the doctor again. They know it is bad and they are playing the grand parent card. However, my father-in-law also plays the "why do you need to watch what you eat" card whenever we go to their house or we talk to them on the phone. He is actively trying to derail our diets. Not really sure why. I also found out schools will allow kids to go back for seconds or thirds if they ask. I found out because a month worth of lunch money on the school account was gone in about 2 weeks. They can also buy snacks off the accounts (which is not regulated by the schools food mandate and can have all sorts of crap in it). I tried to put a stop to it but "it is not the schools job" to monitor that. So I told my kids they get one month of money and that is all they get. If they expend it early, sack lunches for the rest of the year.
I am not shirking responsibility for them. I was complacent about being fat, dumb and happy... and that extended to my kids. I am almost two months into the new me and I am not going back. I am not going to see my children be the "fat kids" at school either. My eldest is seeing how mean other kids can be, and being fat is just an easy target. My youngest is still pretty innocent of these matters but I know she sees how kids can be on the playground... even if she is not the target. Both of my kids also see the physical changes in me and my wife (she is on MFP too and doing great). They see me go out for my C25K and I try to get them to come walk with me, or even take their scooters/bikes along. I get a partner about 1 request in 3.
BTW, both of my girls are pre-teens. I was never going to allow them to hit the forums and was just going to use the "diary" portion of the program. I wanted to use it as a tool with guidance. For instance, I ate a 1/2 cup of refriend beans and had zero clue they were 200 cal?!?! A 1/2 cup of Blue Bell does not have 200 cal That mistake won't happen again. They need to have these sorts of epiphanies with their food too. However, if the TOS say NO and the site is not designed for children... then it is a no. I had never heard of Sparkteens, so thanks for the many recommendations.
As far as the negative replies go, meh. I was asking for advice on your thoughts... not damage control for pulling the trigger and wonder what happened. If a lot of people have these sorts of questions, then you have to look at the why. What is more important though is they are looking for a solution. However, so many people see a question as an easy target. Someone asks for help with a thoughtful opinion get flames in reply. To the trolls, shame on you. To the thoughtful replies, I give you my thanks.
And teaching your kids to make better choices about food is a good idea, but it sounds like you are starting to demonize foods, and teaching that to your kids is probably not the best idea. There is no "good" food and no "bad" food. But, treats should be seen as treats and not the majority of the diet. If you pediatrician flipped out about one cookie, then I could see the in-laws not liking him as a doctor. If they fed your kid 20 cookies, yeah, that's an issue, and one you're going to need to work out with them. You're all adults; you should be able to figure it out.
My mom used to tell me that I couldn't eat certain foods. I started sneaking the foods, hiding wrappers, and I would stay home sick just to gorge myself on "bad foods". I developed a very unhealthy relationship with food, and to this day I still have problems dealing with binges. I'm not blaming this on my parents, but I think a lot of my problems do stem from how I viewed food from an early age. It's definitely not a problem I'd wish on anyone.0 -
I dont have kids and I dont know you, but I would say no.
If they are under 18 are they not at home and eating what you provide? Are you setting the right example and supplying them with filling, attractive & healthy food?
You can not control what they eat outside of the house, but if you show them the path they will eventually follow.
I was always fed healthy food at home but did not understand the principle or understood portion size, I just thought we got small amounts as the food had to be spread between five kids. I moved out and filled out... Almost 20 years on I am actually starting to catch on to portion size...0 -
How often are they at the in-laws? Is this an everyday, after school thing? If so, perhaps it is time to look into alternative babysitting services/after school programs.
My in-laws were feeding my 4 year old doughnuts and pie for every meal, and my baby was being spoonfed cool whip. I'm not exaggerating. And guess what the consequences of that was - They aren't allowed to stay there anymore.0 -
You know, my dad used me being "fat" as a child (from about pre-school through middle school) as an excuse as to why I wasn't allowed to do the activities I wanted to do (racing, gymnastics, etc.)
You know what that did to me?
It convinced me that I was fat. And that if daddy thought I was fat (and he was/is overweight, too) that I would always be fat and I should just accept it. That was the start of a very long spiral into depression/bi-polar disorder.
Some kids are larger than other. Big ****ing deal.
I was the same weight from about 4th grade all the way until I graduated from HS. I got taller, I got trimmer, I was active. You know what? I was still convinced that I was fat.
If you feel that your kids need to lose weight, fine. Do not call them fat. Do not even think that way. Guess what, if you think they're fat, they know you're looking down on them. Be a parent and control their food. Reduce the amount of sweets, sodas, junk that they have access to. Feed them their dietary requirements. If you want to talk to a pediatrician and see how many calories they should be eating a day YOU plan out their calories for the day and offer them what is within their guidelines. It is NOT their problem, it is yours.
Kids grow. If your doctor is truly giving you the evil eye, and NOT recommending what you should do about it, find a new Dr. or grow up and demand that they help.
This right here, her experience is why my heart breaks hearing you call your young daughter FAT.
Because a child should not have to hear that from their parents.0
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