Do you separate meals for your kids?

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  • SunofaBeach14
    SunofaBeach14 Posts: 4,899 Member
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    Our kids generally eat what we eat, though we will, on occasion, make them something different if we want something they don't like. I don't see the point in making a big deal out of it one way or the other.
  • Booksandbeaches
    Booksandbeaches Posts: 1,791 Member
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    Yes. I have to due to food allergies. There are things she can't eat because of her allergies, so she gets a slightly different meal. We might substitute one dish for another. It's really no bother. We're so used to making food this way plus she's not a really picky eater. She eats very healthily.
  • impyimpyaj
    impyimpyaj Posts: 1,073 Member
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    Yes. I have to due to food allergies. There are things she can't eat because of her allergies, so she gets a slightly different meal. We might substitute one dish for another. It's really no bother. We're so used to making food this way plus she's not a really picky eater. She eats very healthily.

    See, that's an entirely different thing though. You're not making something different because she won't eat it, you're making it because she CAN'T eat it.
  • Railr0aderTony
    Railr0aderTony Posts: 6,803 Member
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    Hi
    I am a teacher (grade one) - no kids.
    I am curious:
    How many of you that have kids, create separate meals for you/your partner and then something different for your kids?

    Some of my friends might say...." my kids won't eat what I prepare for dinner, and the only thing they'll eat is chicken nuggets and french fries...so that's what I give them."

    I am under the philosophy of what I grew up with...this is what the family is eating tonight...period.

    If it's 'crappy' food for you, then why the heck are parents continually feeding their precious family these things?? I don't get it... Who's is in charge here?? Kids will eat...eventually!

    #1 you admit you do not have kids
    #2 there are no "Crappy" foods, only foods with different nutritional values
    #3 You are a teacher and see what people send to school with their kids and you still have to ask this?

    With that covered , Yes I prepare separate food for my my kids unless we are having something they like. Is it nuggets or fries ? sometimes but they are baked and not fried. Is it a cheeseburger? sometimes but we use very lean turkey burger and My daughter eats a balanced diet every day. The trick is balance. Now when you have your kids you may feed them whatever you wish until then I will do the same.
  • Galatea_Stone
    Galatea_Stone Posts: 2,037 Member
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    We like to eat what we like to eat, and we're all a little bit different; and that's okay. So if it's okay for me to like different foods than my husband, then why wouldn't it be okay for my kids to like different foods than me?

    I don't tend to prepare different foods for my kids if those different foods are nuggets and fries, but my kids hate brussels sprouts, so really, how much trouble is if for me to make edamame or broccoli for them if I happen to want brussels sprouts? If I am making dinner that everyone likes, then obviously, the kids eat what I eat.

    We aren't a convenience food family, and we aren't a simple recipe family. I cook and eat some pretty exotic foods that aren't kid-friendly. I like to experiment in the kitchen, and sometimes, experimenting with goat and pakistani spices mandates a little different dinner for one of my kids just as much as cooking with tripe mandates cooking something different for the other one.
  • imacowgirl2
    imacowgirl2 Posts: 4 Member
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    I don't want my children growing up fighting their weight like I have, so we have a few rules for meals at our house, mostly involving portion control. I strive to cook a moderately healthy meal that includes protein, at least one vegetable (usually two), and one fruit. We eat a lot of frozen and canned fruits and vegetables. Then going from there, our rules are as follows:

    1. Everyone must have at least two bites of protein and vegetable on their plate from the protein and vegetables that I cooked, and must eat those bites before any alternatives. Those bites must be eaten before seconds, thirds, etc on anything else.
    2. We strive for age-appropriate portion sizes for the initial filling of plates...if you're still hungry after your first serving, you're more than welcome to go back for more, but we encourage only taking half-portions for seconds, thirds, etc.
    3. If you don't like the vegetables served, after trying your two bites you're more than welcome to make yourself a salad to go with your main dish...but Mommy is not making a salad for you, or getting the ingredients out for you (or putting them away).
    4. If you don't like the main dish, you may make yourself a sandwich -- but no seconds on sandwiches. And Mommy is not making your sandwich either.

    I wouldn't want someone forcing me to repeatedly eat large amounts of foods I don't like...so why would I do that to my children? With this system, very rarely do they ever make themselves sandwiches -- they'll make themselves salads maybe once every month or two -- but they also love salads. Giving them guided control over their food choices makes meal times much less stressful, and is teaching them from a young age to make healthy food choices.

    Since we focus mostly on portion control, even on nights that a healthy supper just isn't happening, I dont feel the need to stress about an unhealthy supper -- yeah, they'll consume a few more calories eating take-out...but its only occasionally, and they're pretty good at eating just until they're full, so the repercussions are not long lasting.
  • kb1927
    kb1927 Posts: 32 Member
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    As a former teacher, now SAHM, I asked questions just like the OP. Now that I am a mom, it is much easier to accept that parenting is much harder than it looks, and we all do things that we couldn't understand as just an observer of parenting. (So much cosleeping!)

    That being said, I cook what I cook. If the kids are hungry, they eat it. If not, they won't starve until the next time food is offered. It is not a bad thing to be hungry sometimes. We have not had many struggles over this because this is what we have always done, from the time they first started solids. We let them wean themselves (did baby led weaning), so I was never worried about them not getting enough. Some days they are more adventurous than others, and if there are a few foods that they really hate, they can eat around them. They're still young though, so who knows how this will change as they get older. I'd like to say this is what we'll always do, but I swore my kids wouldn't watch TV either. It didn't take very long for THAT to get thrown out the window.
  • ruqayyahsmum
    ruqayyahsmum Posts: 1,514 Member
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    we have 2 options in my house... take it or leave it. ive always expected her to eat what i eat ( i dont cook with salt )

    i get sick of being told i should feed her kids food. when i asked what that was i was told chicken nuggets, chips, beans on toast etc

    my daughter has asbestos mouth, she LOVES scotch bonnet chilli's, shes been eating african food since she learnt to eat, my partner makes it with that much of a kick i struggle with it yet she thrives on it

    she eats plenty of snacks thou as well as high calorie medical shakes to keep her weight up as she has several disabilitys and medical problems. i just refuse to swap her healthy meals for nuggets and fries as suggested by one helpful dietitian
  • SairahRose
    SairahRose Posts: 412 Member
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    I pretty much have the 80/20 rule, as I follow it myself.
    Yes, sometimes I will cook separate meals for the kids, and they might be nuggets and fries, or a burger - but everything is baked and not fried (except for the once a month takeout we have), and there is always some form of vegetable on the plate.
    We have a try everything on the plate rule. The 9 year old will typically eat everything, although there are some things he won't eat at all, and that's fine - I don't like some foods so why should he?
    The 2 year old is a different matter, and he's currently at a "I don't like fruit and veg" stage. Again, that's fine. He'll grow out of it, and they'll always be on his plate for him to try.
    With the 80/20 rule, it means that I can cook the same meals (with an exception sometimes of a gluten free alternative for me) and they'll eat it most of the time. If not, the youngest one will have something small to eat until he's older, while the older one will go without.
    Healthy snacks - fruit and veg - can be eaten at anytime, but 'junk' snacks are only allowed after school when dinner is at least 2 hours away.

    It works in our house.
  • Lohavio
    Lohavio Posts: 12 Member
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    In our experience you can't make a kid like something. All our kids are everything in the beginning and then developed likes and dislikes. I thought I would be a eat what we eat person but turns out I'd rather my kids have good nutrition.
  • aggieali04
    aggieali04 Posts: 6 Member
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    In our house, one meal is cooked. Eat it or be hungry until the next meal comes in a few hours. You'll survive! Mom (or Dad) isn't a short order cook so no, I do not make separate meals for my kids. I refuse to carry extra food for my kids everywhere and I think it's incredibly rude to go to dinner at someone else's home and bring food along (obviously that would never include kids with allergies or other issues where eating unfamiliar food is a true problem - just referring to some who carry along food for perfectly fine, healthy, normal 5 year olds that just are picky). My sons are 4.5 and 15 months and both eat a wide variety. Sure, they might prefer peas over brussels sprouts but if Mommy fixed bussels sprouts tonight, that's what is offered so that's what we eat that night. "You get what you get, don't throw a fit, and thank God for it!" is the mantra repeated in our home a lot.
  • kesciamuhammad
    kesciamuhammad Posts: 27 Member
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    My husband and I raised three children eating whatever I prepared. Restaurant meals were an occasional treat, not an every other day event. I have always taken nutrition seriously (just like my mom) and there are few gifts more precious than our health and that of our families. Of course children have preferences, and I would take them into account, but I was always the adult making the decisions about what (and when) to eat. By the time my children were old enough to eat out with friends on their own, they had already developed good habits.
    Too many parents create problems for themselves by giving children too many choices at an inappropriate age. If children don't eat the food that's prepared, go to bed at bedtime, or complete their chores it's because their parents have given them a choice in the matter.
  • tnm7760
    tnm7760 Posts: 109 Member
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    My kids eat what I serve. If I know they dislike something, I try to offer sides that they'll eat so I know they get at least a little food. They're "required" to take one bite of everything. But if they refuse I just remind them that they'll be hungry because there's no eating until the next snack or meal. But they're good eaters. We try to really praise them for trying new foods, even if they don't like them. I've ALWAYS included lettuce, tomatoes, peppers, etc. on their tacos, sandwiches, salads, etc. even when they were babies I'd tear up tiny bits of veggies. They don't even know you can request a sand which without tomatoes, lol. I try to not make "kid friendly" versions by omitting veggies or extras. I just put less on and make them MUCH smaller. They grew up eating like that so they don't know a difference. Sure, they sometimes throw tantrums about food, but I'm not a short order cool and they won't starve. I don't make an issue out if it. They eat fast food sometimes, I buy a few convenience foods, but they also eat a wide variety of real food as well as all sorts of ethnic/regional foods. But my kids don't decide what we eat around here, and I certainly don't do separate meals. But, I suppose if that works for some families then it doesn't bother me.
  • Cheeky_and_Geeky
    Cheeky_and_Geeky Posts: 984 Member
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    I typically prepare prepare 3 separate meals, one for me, one for hubby, one for my toddler. We all eat together at the dinner table, with no tv. I'm trying to lose weight, husband is trying to gain weight, and daughter is a picky eater with food allergies. Luckily I'm a SAHM so I have the time to make different dishes for us with little problem.
  • rondaj05
    rondaj05 Posts: 497 Member
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    I didn't read all the posts. At this stage of my life I have the last of 4 kids in my house and I'm over the food battles. Our kids were raised with manners and they know how to act at someone else's house. At OUR house they can eat what we've cooked or not. Makes no difference to me. There are other options available.

    There are many dynamics, for my house, it's been a blended home, I have 2 kids, my husband has 2. With 4 kids being raised in 3 households... we had to learn to pick our battles. We have always had "healthier" choices at our house but BOTH of our ex's used that against us in court battles accusing us of putting the kids "on diets". Obviously this is frowned on by courts and pediatricians... even tho we never ever put ANYONE on a DIET. We just chose to have a healthier lifestyle. The kids played their part, complaining to the other parent that we ONLY have diet food and salad and vegetables and don't buy chips and soda and various junk food.

    Because of the above, we always had options, we are eating THIS. If you don't like it... there's some kind of convenience crap available for you to fix for yourself.
  • magerum
    magerum Posts: 12,589 Member
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    There seems to be a tremendous amount of totalitarian thinking and views here. Heaven forbid individual tastes are developed or catered to. It takes the same amount of time to cook 1 meal or 3. I just got done cooking three nice meals, at the same time. Everyone was happy.
  • Megais
    Megais Posts: 28 Member
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    every meal at the moment. for lunch just now i made them steak pies. for myself a cucumber and some cherry tomatoes. i would have rathered the pie
  • imjolly
    imjolly Posts: 176 Member
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    One meal for the family. I usually tried to make meals that everyone likes but sometimes it didn't work out that way. I would always have them try it and if they didn't like they would just make something else.

    My kids are older now so I'm definitely cooking different now that they are out of the house most of the year. When they are home they eat whatever I cook since they appreciate the fact that I cook and sick of college meals or ramen noodles. : )
  • SunofaBeach14
    SunofaBeach14 Posts: 4,899 Member
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    There seems to be a tremendous amount of totalitarian thinking and views here. Heaven forbid individual tastes are developed or catered to. It takes the same amount of time to cook 1 meal or 3. I just got done cooking three nice meals, at the same time. Everyone was happy.

    Agreed. Our family enjoys food and we allow our kids to develop their own tastes. Our 8 year old will eat curry that will make most adults tear up, but she doesn't like tomato sauce. No biggie, she gets a different sauce on her pasta when we want tomato sauce. No need to get worked up about such minor things.
  • magerum
    magerum Posts: 12,589 Member
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    There seems to be a tremendous amount of totalitarian thinking and views here. Heaven forbid individual tastes are developed or catered to. It takes the same amount of time to cook 1 meal or 3. I just got done cooking three nice meals, at the same time. Everyone was happy.

    Agreed. Our family enjoys food and we allow our kids to develop their own tastes. Our 8 year old will eat curry that will make most adults tear up, but she doesn't like tomato sauce. No biggie, she gets a different sauce on her pasta when we want tomato sauce. No need to get worked up about such minor things.

    +1

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