Was this rude because the guy sure thought it was
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Not rude at all, even without the "please". You did say "thank you", twice.0
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More like leaving clean plates on the table "because someone might want to use them later."Nah, you're good. I wonder if he leaves dirty dishes in the sink "because someone might want to use them later." That's a ridiculous excuse.
Doesn't actually sound too unreasonable like that
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Ah, so you just want him to be a little less lazy so you can be a little more lazy.Thing is I could have lifted them-not squatted it, but lifted the plates off
I've never understood why people get so worked up about it.
I've been moaned at for leaving plates on before because they were too heavy... but then it's my own setup which my friend was using for free - I just suggested she obviously DID need to improve her functional strength and should practice by taking the plates off
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From your original post:
For a lot of people, 25kg each side is a base weight - would expect most males a little serious about their squats who do a warm up would be starting around that (and maybe women a bit more into it) - so I suspect if it's purely used for squatting, on average you're making it less convenient not more by getting this sign up and forcing people to remove weights. For MORE people the bar is not a weight they would use, but you're happy with that when it's for others, it seems.it's not very nice for someone else to come too if that's not a weight they can't use
Ah this guy is clearly one of the people we all hate in the gym. It's stupid to assume everyone starts with the same amount of weight, and people should haven't to unrack other peoples bars, because you are too lazy. and no that doesn't make her extra lazy it just makes her somebody who follows the rules, and thinks other people should too, they gym would be so much better if it were like that, and people would probably get their workouts done quicker too.0 -
Seems like there was room for additional etiquette on both sides. A "please" is always a good idea, but this guy seemed to have his pride hurt a little, being asked to clean up after himself. His remark seems like an attempt to save a bit of face.
And to be perfectly honest, it took me a few months before I picked up on how much of a rude *kitten* I was being by not clearing my weights. I saw so many people leaving their weights on and I had gotten used to clearing weights off the bar that I didn't even think of the inconvenience I was causing. I get it now.0 -
I made a suggestion in my gym the other week that maybe they put up a sign in front of the squat rack about taking the weights off after you've finished which they did which is brilliant !
But today I was using the chest fly machine waiting for the squat rack to be free as there was a youngish guy using it. He had 25kg plates on both sides. Anyways, he did a set and then started to walk away so I said and this is exactly how it went:
"Are you done with that?"
"Yes, why?"
"Could you take the weights of it"
"Why?"
"Well there's a sign asking you too and it's not very nice for someone else to come too if that's not a weight they can't use"
"What if the next person wants to use that weight"
"Well I'm using it next and I can't squat that weight"
So he reluctantly walks back and as he is taking off weights on one side I said thanks, then he walked round and did the other side and again before he was done lifting the weight off I said thanks very much. As he starts walking off he snidely turns and says something which I didn't hear so said excuse me, and he goes "a please would have been good"
I just thought what is that guys problem? Then I thought did I approach that situation wrong ? I NEVER speak up and I don't know what came over me today, the words were sort of out of my mouth before I thought about it and yes I'll admit I could have said "could you take the weights off it PLEASE" but I didn't think I was rude, or in the wrong for that matter!!!
If you said thank you that's good enough.
Unless the guy couldn't read - you shouldn't of had to ask.
Forget about it the guys a D*ck!!!!0 -
many guys forget some females use the barbells and just assume a guy will come along next and use 1 plate as their warmup. Most guys warmup with 1 plate on each side for squats. Only ever seen a few guys squat or warmup with less and that's because they were beginners. Just an oversight on the guy's part I think.
I always leave 1 or 2 plates on the leg press machine since almost everyone does at least a plate due to nature of the machine. But guys should realize barbells are a different story and people use them for more than squats. Could be a person is going to use it to overhead press and wont want to warmup with 135lbs.
The main reason I hate when people don't unrack barbells is that a loaded barbell looks like it's being used. That annoys me much more than having to take off a plate or two.
So an unracked barbell looks like it is being used, but an unracked leg press says hey come use me? Also I do warm up sets with just the bar then one plate on each side, and then two plates on each side, it makes it easier on my legs to get a series of stretches first with lighter weight before moving on to the heavy stuff.0 -
Why would you hate me in the gym?Ah this guy is clearly one of the people we all hate in the gym.
Who has assumed EVERYONE starts with the same weight?
And just to clarify - her not wanting to do the bit of work isn't lazy, but the other person not doing it is?0 -
Why would you hate me in the gym?Ah this guy is clearly one of the people we all hate in the gym.
Who has assumed EVERYONE starts with the same weight?
And just to clarify - her not wanting to do the bit of work isn't lazy, but the other person not doing it is?
Yes the other person not clearing weights they put on is lazy, and her not wanting to clear other peoples weight is not... I don't know how it could get any simpler than that.
I would hate you at the gym, because you don't clear your weights, I thought that was pretty clear as well.
You assumed everyone starts with the same weights, by leaving your weights on there0 -
Are you 'a lot of people' or are you ".... male...."?incorrect.
If not, what you say in no way contradicts my assertions. I specifically mentioned males as women in general don't lift as much due to genetics and so on.
Why not? Why did you even say this?it's not sensible to assume someone can't move YOUR weights.
You really feel that strongly over having to spend a few extra second moving some weights? A lot of things others do inconvienence me a lot more than that and I don't feel that strongly about them.rude as fu*k to leave them their for someone else to clean up.
On re-racking, this actually does annoy me a bit - when the weights rack is a way away. Thankfully, the last commercial gym I used regularly kept some weights on the floor around the squat rack. Otherwise the time taken DID start to add up as you karted all the weights over, avoiding other people and so on - which in the world so many want, someone else would have just done the exact reverse off.
I'd certainly prefer weights left on a bar to a rack the otherside of the gym!
(This is of course presuming the gym has an adequate amount of weights so none is short.)
And... just a thought.
The time taken to get someone to put a notice up and so on, so everyone else conforms to the OP's wishes could have seen a lot of weights taken off bar.
I get where you're coming from, as I don't mind unracking a bar either. Doesn't bother me in the least. But we're both guys, and assuming you're at least average build and height, it's so much easier for us. Taking 1000 pounds off the leg press is a nuisance, but it doesn't fatigue me in the slightest. But if I was 5'3" and 135 pounds, it would require a significant amount of My energy.
That said, I'm not sure why a lot of people feel like you can just talk to people any way you want because you feel that you're in the right. Know what my receptionist's job is? To answer calls and take messages. It's in writing as part of her job description. But I still say please and thank you. Every time.0 -
I guess a "please" would have been a good idea, but he is still the one in the wrong. Some people are so freakin' clueless!!! Good for you for speaking up!!!
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Getting the plates off the bar can be difficult even for short males. For my wife and daughters, who are all right around 5'0" tall it is impossible. I myself have had trouble at times removing plates if the person who left them was tall. It's just plain rude to leave them on there regardless.
Side note: one of the best ever light to middleweight squatters, Rickey Dale Crain, started with just the bar and he squatted as much as 800 lbs.0 -
I get so tired of defending myself cause someone dosent like my " tone" when what they really dont like is being wrong. And why do we as women always assume we did something wrong when we try to be asserative. Good for you
I just thought what is that guys problem? Then I thought did I approach that situation wrong ? I NEVER speak up and I don't know what came over me today, the words were sort of out of my mouth before I thought about it and yes I'll admit I could have said "could you take the weights off it PLEASE" but I didn't think I was rude, or in the wrong for that matter!!!0 -
I don't generally ask people to unrack their weights in the gym as its a lost cause, but no a please wasn't necessary, its a common courtesy to unrack your weights and only ****heads don't do it.0
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And just to clarify - her not wanting to do the bit of work isn't lazy, but the other person not doing it is?
Is it lazy of me not to want to wash my roommate's dishes?
Is it lazy of me to expect my nephews to put their own shoes away? They're not too heavy for me, it's pretty easy to pick them up and put them in the shoe bin. So I'm lazy to not want to pick up after other people? To expect other people to pick up after themselves?
You're kind of ridiculous.0 -
I immediately knew I should have said please, I'm normally very good on manners so I thought I'd make up for it by saying thank-you a few times !!
I'm with you. I always try and say please and thank you but it sounds like he was just tweaked that he got called out. It's all good and I love how he tried to squirm out of it even after you called him on it. What if someone else wants to lift this weight? HA!:laugh:0 -
My response would have been. "No discussion would have been necessary had you followed the instructions."0
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Are you 'a lot of people' or are you ".... male...."?incorrect.
If not, what you say in no way contradicts my assertions. I specifically mentioned males as women in general don't lift as much due to genetics and so on.
Why not? Why did you even say this?it's not sensible to assume someone can't move YOUR weights.
You really feel that strongly over having to spend a few extra second moving some weights? A lot of things others do inconvienence me a lot more than that and I don't feel that strongly about them.rude as fu*k to leave them their for someone else to clean up.
On re-racking, this actually does annoy me a bit - when the weights rack is a way away. Thankfully, the last commercial gym I used regularly kept some weights on the floor around the squat rack. Otherwise the time taken DID start to add up as you karted all the weights over, avoiding other people and so on - which in the world so many want, someone else would have just done the exact reverse off.
I'd certainly prefer weights left on a bar to a rack the otherside of the gym!
(This is of course presuming the gym has an adequate amount of weights so none is short.)
And... just a thought.
The time taken to get someone to put a notice up and so on, so everyone else conforms to the OP's wishes could have seen a lot of weights taken off bar.
anyone I have done power lifting or oly lifting with did the bar at least once- male and female.
I worked at a gym- I pretty much live at a gym- it's not a few minutes of my day- it winds up being hours you spend looking for stuff you need and as an employee cleaning up and as a patron- I moved HUNDREDS of weights around a day cleaning up after people. I started to hurt my back and my shoulders- and I know how to pick stuff up. It takes 5 minutes to put up a sign- it takes 30 seconds for YOU the user to put stuff away- it takes a staff member 15-30 minutes to clean up. EVERY day they do that.
If you don't put it away- that means someone else has to- it's not fair to make staff do it- and it's not fair to make someone else do it for you. That's all there is to it- you THINK it doesn't bother people- but at some point- SOMEONE has to put it away- either it's the guy who put it there- or the guy who uses it later and then puts it away- or the poor staff member who is REQUIRED to tidy up throughout the day.
If someone is tall and leaves 315 on the rack on a top peg- I"m now lifting 45's over my shoulders and down essentially- yeah it's a struggle and energy drain for me. I'd honestly rather spend my energy squatting than playing maid. Ultimately if I have to move 315 off of every bar- that adds up.
It's not that big of a deal to put it away- if you got it out- then you can put it away.0 -
Only in your mind.because you don't clear your weights, I thought that was pretty clear as well.
If you'd taken the time to read my posts before responding, you'll note the only time I've specified I DON'T remove my own weights is in my own place. If you'd really come and use the my weights area for free (including the power cage that I built by myself, the equipment I paid for and so on) and you would then 'hate' me because I left my own weights on my own bar...
Then I certainly wouldn't be inviting you a second time!
If you read in that I do such in commercial gyms which request you don't, I'd suggest you take the time to read what you are responding to before getting all enraged by it!
No, I did not assume 'everyone' starts with the same weights.You assumed everyone starts with the same weights, by leaving your weights on there
Had you considered it might be good etiquette to read posts before responding with outraged anger?
I was never bothered by cleaning a housemates dishes - if I wanted to use one or if I was doing washing up anyway.
As it goes, there was one housemate who I stopped cleaning for - this was when I had done 3 loads of some crockery I had GIVEN her and was a bit dusty from storage. Her comment "well, if you're not going to do it properly, don't bother" when she found some bit less than perfect. I was amused to see her dirty stuff pile up for 7 days before it got cleaned (it was her house).
Anyway - if I clean some dirty dishes and the house mate then cleans mine the next time, what difference does it make?
Lets switch it around and imagine a bloke approached a woman like this.And why do we as women always assume we did something wrong when we try to be asserative. Good for you
I bet we'd see a post on here talking about intimidation and bullying in the weights room, chauvinism and so on.
Many women do seem to consider it ok to be ruder than they want others to be to them.0 -
I would have said PLEASE learn how to read, *kitten*.
hahaha!!!0 -
He was just mad you called him on it. :laugh: If he couldn't get you on that, he would have found something else to chasten you for.0
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Even worse than not unracking the bar (at least the plates are there) are those that take the weights from the squat rack and use them on the other side of the gym and just leave them when they are done. I can't start my routine without first going on a damn scavenger hunt for the plates. And YES, there are signs to return equipment to their original places. No one cares, obviously...except ME.0
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This might sound wierd, but I actually don't mind when someone doesn't unrack their weights. I prefer that they dont. I make it a part of my workout. As a matter of fact, my trainer would make me switch out my weights and then his weights. Helps build my strength, arms/ shoulders, and legs for I had to squat to get the 45lb plates up and onto the bar.
But you are still right, he sould've easily said "Oh I'm sorry, let me get that" or something along the line.
*** And I am also that person that will organize all the weights accordingly. All the 10lbs in their appropriate slots, 25s and 45s as well. Might be my OCD that kicks in. Especially when I go to the gym close to closing time, I know the employees will have to organize them. Like I said I make it part of my workout.0 -
Lets switch it around and imagine a bloke approached a woman like this.
I bet we'd see a post on here talking about intimidation and bullying in the weights room, chauvinism and so on.
Many women do seem to consider it ok to be ruder than they want others to be to them.
In all honesty.....we had that thread about a month ago.0 -
Lets switch it around and imagine a bloke approached a woman like this.
I bet we'd see a post on here talking about intimidation and bullying in the weights room, chauvinism and so on.
Many women do seem to consider it ok to be ruder than they want others to be to them.
In all honesty.....we had that thread about a month ago.
Yep. And the answers were pretty much the same. The difference there was that the OP in that one wasn't nearly as polite.0 -
He sorta seems like a dlck.0
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I like how many are reading into this guy's thoughts and feelings ("He's embarassed at being called out."). How do you know that? I like to give the benefit of doubt - Maybe he is new to lifting (although doubtful at what he was lifting) and didn't know you need to remove the weights or maybe he didn't see the sign. Maybe he was thinking about something else or had a lot on his mind. I've done that from time to time and forgot to remove the weights that I used. Is it possible that someone else may have the same issue?
At the Gold's Gym where I go, a lot of guys and gals don't put away their weights or wipe down the equipment. They just move on. If the weight is one that I can't lift off the equipment (generally greater than 45 pounds on a rack above my waist since I had surgery on my shoulder and should avoid those things), I will ask a staff member to take the weight off rather than piss off the one that left it there. Then the staff member can go and talk to the person who left it there, if that person is known. That is their job. No, I am not passive, but there have been problems at this particular gym where some members have bullied other members over similar things and not getting into that situation in the first place means that I don't get to be a target. I have had, though, guys ask if I want them to take the weights off. Depending upon what I need for that piece of equipment, I will either say "Yes, please" or "No, thank you so very much for asking". I think everyone at this gym has had problems with at least one person or other, but I haven't really had problems.
Although we would like to see people respond, "Oh, hey, I'm really sorry I left them there. Let me take them down for you.", that is the ideal world. We don't live in the ideal world. I agree with Geebusuk in that if the tables were turned and it was a man asking a woman to remove the weights, the woman would have had a hissy fit. Why do I say that? Because I have seen it happen at the gym I go to at least once or twice a month. Woman take it for granted that, since guys are stronger than they are, the guys can remove the weights that the woman used, but lord forbid if that guy leaves the weights on the equipment.
Just a word of advice: Obviously, leaving weights on the squat rack is a problem at your gym. Otherwise, you would not have asked for a sign to be posted. No matter if there is a sign posted or not, if you tell enough men to remove the weights from the equipment, eventually you will be seen as a real b**ch. Is that what you really want?0 -
It's common gym etiquette to re-rack your weights. Pretty much ALL gyms have that rule.0
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*** And I am also that person that will organize all the weights accordingly. All the 10lbs in their appropriate slots, 25s and 45s as well. Might be my OCD that kicks in. Especially when I go to the gym close to closing time, I know the employees will have to organize them. Like I said I make it part of my workout.
i do the same thing...annoys me to no end0 -
This might sound wierd, but I actually don't mind when someone doesn't unrack their weights. I prefer that they dont. I make it a part of my workout. As a matter of fact, my trainer would make me switch out my weights and then his weights. Helps build my strength, arms/ shoulders, and legs for I had to squat to get the 45lb plates up and onto the bar.
But you are still right, he sould've easily said "Oh I'm sorry, let me get that" or something along the line.
*** And I am also that person that will organize all the weights accordingly. All the 10lbs in their appropriate slots, 25s and 45s as well. Might be my OCD that kicks in. Especially when I go to the gym close to closing time, I know the employees will have to organize them. Like I said I make it part of my workout.
This! I also see it as part of my workout.0 -
Just a word of advice: Obviously, leaving weights on the squat rack is a problem at your gym. Otherwise, you would not have asked for a sign to be posted. No matter if there is a sign posted or not, if you tell enough men to remove the weights from the equipment, eventually you will be seen as a real b**ch. Is that what you really want?
I threw an out and out ***** fit one friday night- I just started yelling DID NONE OF YOU GRADUATE ****ING HIGH SCHOOL_ CAN YOU NOT MATCH UP THE NUMBERS ON THE WEIGHTS WITH THE NUMBERS ON THE RACKS.
It was a much longer rant than that- and all the regular's were wildly amused but seriously- it can be a problem- and I don't really care if it makes me a bit*h- or someone thinks I"m high maintenance- I'm there to lift- not clean up after anyone else or spend literally 10 minutes looking for the ONE set of 15's we have.
There is a sign in almost EVERY gym EVER known to man kind to re-rack your weights. There is very little excuse to ever leave them there.0 -
I like how many are reading into this guy's thoughts and feelings ("He's embarassed at being called out."). How do you know that? I like to give the benefit of doubt - Maybe he is new to lifting (although doubtful at what he was lifting) and didn't know you need to remove the weights or maybe he didn't see the sign. Maybe he was thinking about something else or had a lot on his mind. I've done that from time to time and forgot to remove the weights that I used. Is it possible that someone else may have the same issue?
At the Gold's Gym where I go, a lot of guys and gals don't put away their weights or wipe down the equipment. They just move on. If the weight is one that I can't lift off the equipment (generally greater than 45 pounds on a rack above my waist since I had surgery on my shoulder and should avoid those things), I will ask a staff member to take the weight off rather than piss off the one that left it there. Then the staff member can go and talk to the person who left it there, if that person is known. That is their job. No, I am not passive, but there have been problems at this particular gym where some members have bullied other members over similar things and not getting into that situation in the first place means that I don't get to be a target. I have had, though, guys ask if I want them to take the weights off. Depending upon what I need for that piece of equipment, I will either say "Yes, please" or "No, thank you so very much for asking". I think everyone at this gym has had problems with at least one person or other, but I haven't really had problems.
Although we would like to see people respond, "Oh, hey, I'm really sorry I left them there. Let me take them down for you.", that is the ideal world. We don't live in the ideal world. I agree with Geebusuk in that if the tables were turned and it was a man asking a woman to remove the weights, the woman would have had a hissy fit. Why do I say that? Because I have seen it happen at the gym I go to at least once or twice a month. Woman take it for granted that, since guys are stronger than they are, the guys can remove the weights that the woman used, but lord forbid if that guy leaves the weights on the equipment.
Just a word of advice: Obviously, leaving weights on the squat rack is a problem at your gym. Otherwise, you would not have asked for a sign to be posted. No matter if there is a sign posted or not, if you tell enough men to remove the weights from the equipment, eventually you will be seen as a real b**ch. Is that what you really want?
Interesting.
At my gym (also has a multiple signs to replace your weights), I have to re-rack the last person's weights about 80% of the time - they're always long gone so I don't get to call anyone out on it - and I would, though I'd be polite. I couldn't care less if someone sees me as a b****. Especially someone I already see as an inconsiderate a**. Of those I see lifting, it's always the women who re-rack and the men who don't. Even the personal trainers are this way - the lone woman has her clients re-rack and the men don't.
I get really irritated about it because not only am I short and light and don't want to be potentially dropping heavy weights on my head, but my gym is connected to a health care system, meaning that a good percentage of the members are doing some form of physical rehab. They definitely shouldn't be having to shift weights in ways not prescribed by their PT. Granted, they should also be asking staff to move those weights for them, but I'm sure a good percentage think they can manage. I wonder how many people have injured themselves that way?0
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