help me inspire my mom to lose weight

I'd say tell them exactly what you posted about your calorie intake and burning cals, and explain that no matter what age you are, you can do what your doing and be healthy. Age doesn't have anything to do with will power, and that anyone of any age can accomplish weight loss. Good luck!

The way I see it we all deserve to be healthy and happy no matter what age we are. We deserve to take care of ourselves and feel confident about it.

Just continue doing what you are doing and maybe they will come around, but you they are not going to do anything until they are ready. Maybe next time they say something you could invite them to go for a walk with you or some other lower impact excise thing. Something that is also social. It might get them going in the right direction.

More than likely there is nothing you can say or do. They have to want it for themselves. I have the same problem with my mom and my sister who yo-yo diets.

Many excuses given. The best think you can do is keep up the good example and maintain.

Once they mention "to you or ask you for help", then you will be able to do some good. Just be ready!!

I am 58 as well and just passed my goal weight by 2 pounds! I have never felt better in my life. A friend who had just lost 50 pounds with a hospital program was told that he added 15 years to his life with his new, healthy body. I treasure my time on this earth with my wonderful family and want to be here as long as possible. Keep doing what you are doing and the better you look and feel, the more it will encourage them. My husband was watching me lose and is now on MFP and is losing steadily. He is 59. Please encourage them.

Sometimes when people get older, they lose the desire to lose weight for any reason other than to be healthy. They don't feel like they'll ever look good in a swimsuit anymore, and they become so comfortable with their physical appearance that they don't want to go through all the work to lose weight.

That's not universal - please don't kill me over it! :-)

The point I'm trying to make is that sometimes it needs to be an issue where they're concerned with their health. Get Mom to go to the doctor and get a physical, complete with a blood test that will show her the blood pressure, cholesterol, etc. And somehow, she's got to really care about those numbers. Someone's also got to explain the physical toll your bones take from an overweight body over many years as well.

I don't want to discourage you, but at least from what I've experienced in my own family, older family members in general only want to lose weight when they're concerned about the health risks they'd be accepting by not losing weight.

Hi,
Look at the book Fiber 35 Diet by Brenda Watson. Have your Mom look at it. I understand some of what your Mom is saying & she may not feel 100% to diet but this book is incredibly user friendly. If she starts slow with this way of life diet (with fiber - nature's weight loss) she might gradually feel better & this could turn things around for her.

Everyone is right on track here. Unfortunately people REALLY have to want it, to really get it...and even then its an uphill battle! My biggest things for encouraging people are showing people MFP, explaining calorie counting, how exercise ties in and offering to be a source of encouragement and a workout buddy! Maybe offering to walk, a very low impact but highly effective workout, with your mom would be a good way to be supportive and offer a solution!

Some people won't react until some sort of obesity related trauma happens like a mild heart attack. In many cases, it's too late by then. Honestly, the people that lose vast amounts of weight after spending a lifetime of eating badly are rare. It's not easy to all of a sudden stop eating goo-gobs of butter, salt, and all the fatty creams on everything. It's not easy to stop yourself from eating a truckload of chocolate ice cream after you've been doing it your entire life. Therefore, a lot of people with unhealthy lifestyles will just say it's impossible for them to lose the weight. They'll make excuses that they're too old, too poor, and cannot afford the diet. If you nudged them too much into trying to lose weight, you'll start to alienate them. Just keep setting the example; and if they ask about losing weight, talk to them about the program, reducing calories, and doing a little more walking, but don't be confrontational about it.

More than likely there is nothing you can say or do. They have to want it for themselves. I have the same problem with my mom and my sister who yo-yo diets.

Many excuses given. The best think you can do is keep up the good example and maintain.

Once they mention "to you or ask you for help", then you will be able to do some good. Just be ready!!

You will not believe this!! Last night, I returned a call from my mom.

Get this after what I just said above, I can't believe this happened.

She told me she had talked to my dad about going to a clinic to help her with her weight problem. But it would require 4 hour drive each week. So they decided for go with Herbal Life program, because I friend does it. She had just come over with info and things they needed to get started. My mom started last night.

I'm not a big fan of herbal life, I don't like the idea of replacing 2 meals with herbal life shakes. But its a start!!

Everyone's advice here was helpful for me as well. My mom is obese and often pushes me to keep the weight off, making comments about how my clothes fit, the food I eat in front of her, and by trying to keep tabs on my weight/gym habits. I'm an adult, so I find this behavior to be a bit insulting. She says she only does it so that I don't "get fat like she is."

The point I'm making here is that now that I've started to take weight off, mom makes comments that she'd like to do the same. It's really sad to go shopping for her. She's in a size 22 and can never find anything pretty. We went shopping for a mother of the bride outfit and she only had two choices which looked absolutely hideous on her. I could tell she felt bad.

I think her weight issues stems back to the fact that mom had an exploratory surgury in her early twenties. Without it, she would have died because her intestines were stuck together and she would have contracted gangerene eventually. It was done in the 80s and she has a huge scar that looks like a nightcrawler on her belly. I think she let herself get so large because she has a poor self-image of herself. We've talked on and off about how reconstructive surgury could be done on the scar, but she usually says she's old and fat so it doesn't matter... So sad!:-(

Yet, she doesn't do anything to help herself. She doesn't exercise or even walk because she's: too tired, has a headache, her heel bothers her, and mariad of other excuses. Not only that, but when she goes grocery shopping she buys healthy things like salads for dad, but a variety of junk food (pies, cake, cookies, you name it) for herself because "it's on sale." It drives me nuts that she says she wants to change/lose weight, but she does nothing about it!!

I totally sympathize and have yet to find a way to overcome my own mother's attitude. I've just given up because I guess she needs to make that decision, I can't make her do it if she doesn't want to. It would just be nice to have my mother around for a long time... but who knows how her health will go with the way things are now?*worried*

Shannon

I'd encourage them to get on MFP and read the message boards. If they see other women their own age doing it, that may give them ecouragement.

Bring them on a "field trip" to look at the Success Stories on this website. There are all sorts of older people having huge successes here.

The sad part is that until they're prepared to own the process, they're not ready to do it. You can't force it.

I'm 51 and now in skinny jeans for the first time in my life. AND THEY'RE TOO BIG! That has to count for something!!!

For Princess, all I can say is hang in there. All of the advice given has been great, but to truly change, they have to want . My sitch is a bit different. My mom is seeing that she has to change because I need her around more than she needs me. My RA is getting to the point that I can't dress myself or brush my teeth by myself. So I need Mom to do it for me. It's sad, but the dead truth and she is beginning to see it. She's dropping hints about hitting the gym and she's making a "small" effort to eat better. Just hang in there. Don't push, just show by example.

And yeah, my mom works a computer at work all day long, but asking her to navigate the internet is like watching her pilot the Space Shuttle!!!!!

Some proof that "older" people can do it. My mom is 61 years old. She only had about 15 pounds to lose, but has lost that since October. All she has done is exercise and watch her calorie intake. She's even been able to indulge in sweets, etc.

Age doesn't matter. The desire to work is the only thing holding them back. But, I will say... no one is going to lose weight unless they are in the right frame of mind. I've learned that the hard way!