Ex- GF Facebook
Wookinpanub
Posts: 635 Member
She has become my motivation. We had a bad break up 20 years ago and I haven't seen her in 15 years. I have thought about her a lot. Out of the blue she facebook friend requests me. She is an athletic trainer and looks awesome. I would be very embarrassed for her to see me at my current weight and have begun a weight loss program (again). This is motivating me a lot and we have exchanged a couple random messages which amped up my motivation. I even got a candy crush invite from her on Monday and that got me very motivated to stick to my program. I am sure the candy crush thing was generic and not specific for me but nonetheless. I want to continue to use this over the next few months as motivation but I am worried if I push too hard via messages, she will bring me back to reality (she wants no part of me). I tell my self if I reach my goal by late summer I will ask her to meet up for lunch.
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Replies
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If you had a bad break up then she is bad for you. Keep her out of your life and do you for you. I sorta see where this is motivating you but I also think nothing good will come of it.0
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Candy Crush? ANGTFD0
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Well, on a lighter note - I've done this. I've thought about ex's and running into them and wanting to look amazing at that time. However, I agree with 4legs - no real good will come of this. If you broke up, it was for a reason, right? I don't think there's any harm in using it as motivation to lose weight and feel good about yourself. I bet once you start losing, that will be come less and less of a motivator, and you will simply enjoy being healthy. Good luck!!0
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It's been 20 years. He was 22 at the time. I assume they have both matured since then ...If you had a bad break up then she is bad for you. Keep her out of your life and do you for you. I sorta see where this is motivating you but I also think nothing good will come of it.0 -
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Well, seeing as how humans are motivated by three needs, food, shelter and sex... sounds like a perfect motivator!0
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Use it as a motivator but do not set your heart on something coming of it.0
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I think your main motivation needs to be yourself and getting healthy/ in shape. The ex-gf could just be a bonus.
That is what it is for me...I am losing weight, eating better, exercising for me and for my 3 kids so I can live a long happy and healthy life and so they can follow my lead and do the same thing once they are on their own.
Now I am going through a divorce and a small (very small) part would love to rub it in his face when i am in great shape and happy without him :happy: But again my main motivation is myself and kids because that is what will keep me going for the long haul.
Good luck!0 -
Candy crush request? She obviously wants the D! Go get her!
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If you had a bad break up then she is bad for you. Keep her out of your life and do you for you. I sorta see where this is motivating you but I also think nothing good will come of it.
You never know. 20 years can change two people.0 -
Candy crush request? She obviously wants the D! Go get her!
Chicks are crazy for the D when they play candy crush!0 -
Candy crush request? She obviously wants the D! Go get her!
:laugh: :laugh: :laugh:0 -
I mean I can see why this would be motivating.
That was kind of a motivator for me, too. Not an ex, rather, but running into old friends. I'd hate to run into one at the mall and have their first thought be "Damn. She got fat." because you KNOW that would happen. Then they would tell everyone else.
But if their first reaction was "WOW. look at her!!" That'd make me feel accomplished.0 -
Boom!
THe Candy Crush makes everyone crazy!0 -
Well, on a lighter note - I've done this. I've thought about ex's and running into them and wanting to look amazing at that time. However, I agree with 4legs - no real good will come of this. If you broke up, it was for a reason, right? I don't think there's any harm in using it as motivation to lose weight and feel good about yourself. I bet once you start losing, that will be come less and less of a motivator, and you will simply enjoy being healthy. Good luck!!
This sums it up. I am using it as a motivation. I don't want to run into her or maybe she asks to meet me for an innocent/friendly cup of coffee and I am 65 lbs over weight and she has a rock hard body. I am sure she was just being friendly with the fb request and I am sure there is less than <.0001% chance of us reconnecting but it is good to use as motivation.
PS - we broke up b/c I was a stupid college guy who couldn't keep in my pants and she was wanting to spread her wings anyway.0 -
Hell I use anything as motivation, if this motivates you go for it. I use people I dislike as motivation, I also use people I like as motivation. Whatever gets you eating better and moving more is always good in my opinion. To me motivation is the key to weight loss, if you aren't motivated you aren't going to eat right or exercise.0
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This kind of makes me sad. I read the story of your weight gain and it kind of mirrors my husband's story. I don't think I'd be mad, but I'd be a little sad if my husband were using this connection to an ex-gf as motivation. Hell, if I'm honest, I'd be crushed. So, actually, thank you for posting this. This has added on to the heaps of motivation I already have to become rock hard - I'M going to be my husbands motivation, damnit...not some tart from his past lol
Thanks!0 -
If that's motivation to get in shape...USE IT!! Who cares if nothing is ever going to come of it....use it to lose the weight and get healthy. And then ask her to lunch!
I live 2500 miles from home now and I'm married, and about 2-3 months before I go back home I am primping and dieting like crazy! I have some old high school friends, ex-boyfriends, and other friends who don't see me often, except a few "selfies", so I want to look my best. If anything, I want to show people how well I'm doing....for me personally "Look how fat I've gotten" doesn't say "I'm happy, I'm successful, and look what you're missing out on".0 -
:laugh: :flowerforyou:Candy crush request? She obviously wants the D! Go get her!
lmfao!!!!0 -
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If that's motivation to get in shape...USE IT!! Who cares if nothing is ever going to come of it....use it to lose the weight and get healthy. And then ask her to lunch!
I live 2500 miles from home now and I'm married, and about 2-3 months before I go back home I am primping and dieting like crazy! I have some old high school friends, ex-boyfriends, and other friends who don't see me often, except a few "selfies", so I want to look my best. If anything, I want to show people how well I'm doing....for me personally "Look how fat I've gotten" doesn't say "I'm happy, I'm successful, and look what you're missing out on".
Exactly, I want to use it as motivation and maybe ask her to lunch if and ONLY IF I meet my goal.0 -
I will take the motivation where I can get it!!!! I invent scenarios in my head for motivation if I am lacking on real motivation, so hey..........run with it!!!! Just remember along the way that you are doing this for you and you will be the one ultimately benefiting from the rewards of your new lifestyle. In the end, you may just not even need her motivation any more because YOU are the awesome one!!!!0
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This kind of makes me sad. I read the story of your weight gain and it kind of mirrors my husband's story. I don't think I'd be mad, but I'd be a little sad if my husband were using this connection to an ex-gf as motivation. Hell, if I'm honest, I'd be crushed. So, actually, thank you for posting this. This has added on to the heaps of motivation I already have to become rock hard - I'M going to be my husbands motivation, damnit...not some tart from his past lol
Thanks!
Please don't let anything this person posted have any bearing on your marriage. There's absolutely no connection. Just because this guy wants to lose weight for an ex doesn't mean your husband does.
:noway:
honey....we be crazy....you know this. Girls are CRAZY and we go down these rabbit holes.0 -
I tried using an ex as motivation and you're right if she shoots you down when you try to get her back you will loose your steam. Like everyone else has said use that as your intial motivation but find something else because if she shoots you down you have the potential to gain double what you lost.0
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This kind of makes me sad. I read the story of your weight gain and it kind of mirrors my husband's story. I don't think I'd be mad, but I'd be a little sad if my husband were using this connection to an ex-gf as motivation. Hell, if I'm honest, I'd be crushed. So, actually, thank you for posting this. This has added on to the heaps of motivation I already have to become rock hard - I'M going to be my husbands motivation, damnit...not some tart from his past lol
Thanks!
Please don't let anything this person posted have any bearing on your marriage. There's absolutely no connection. Just because this guy wants to lose weight for an ex doesn't mean your husband does.
:noway:
honey....we be crazy....you know this. Girls are CRAZY and we go down these rabbit holes.
...This. And, if it helps drive me, I don't see a problem with it. It's not like I'm going to start grilling my husband on his FB friend's list because of this post :laugh:
Besides, how do you know I'm NOT his wife...? lol0 -
How does your wife feel about you using an ex for motivation?0
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I will take the motivation where I can get it!!!! I invent scenarios in my head for motivation if I am lacking on real motivation, so hey..........run with it!!!! Just remember along the way that you are doing this for you and you will be the one ultimately benefiting from the rewards of your new lifestyle. In the end, you may just not even need her motivation any more because YOU are the awesome one!!!!
I so do the same thing! Normally these scenarios involve me walking into the room with my hair blowing and Louis Louis playing while I walk. LOL
OP, use whatever you want to. I'd be a liar if I didn't say that Ex's and current crushes don't motivate me to work harder.0 -
PS - we broke up b/c I was a stupid college guy who couldn't keep in my pants
lol, if that is the case have you considered maybe she has been wanting to rub it in your face all these years and has decided now is the time? Sounds like it has worked.0 -
Good luck!!!!!! Good Bye Pounds!0
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Candy crush request? She obviously wants the D! Go get her!
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