Geting your kids on track..

Tough job as a parent...
My only advice, for what it is worth, is to lead by example.
Good Luck!

I mean, she's six years old. I think it's great that you want to teach her good health habits, but I would go with more of a behavioral approach because I don't know if she's really old enough to understand your reasoning or motivation when asking her to make these changes. You're the parent, so really you're in control of whether she gets a snack after dinner or whether she gets chips at school. The problem a lot of parents have is that they want to avoid a fuss, so they give in whenever their children pester them for something, like a candy bar at the grocery store. In doing so, you're just teaching the child that they only have to yell and scream in order to get what they want. So I would recommend that until she's older, you just decide how often you're going to give her treats and what you're going to give her and try your best to stick to it. She should not have direct access to whatever treats she wants. You may have to put up with a few tantrums in the process, but that's part of being a parent, right?

On the other hand, though, I wouldn't worry too much about her weight if she's just "borderline" as you said. I personally don't think kids should be required to strictly track their diet and exercise unless something has really gone wrong, and she really is very young.

Good luck!

She is six years old and at a very impressionable age. It sounds like you are setting her up for failure down the road if you are starting to have conversations now about weight loss. She is a growing kid and it is quite possible that she truly is hungry after dinner and that may have nothing to do with your fear of eating out of boredom. I would suggest not projecting your fears and issues onto your kid.

She is six years old and at a very impressionable age. It sounds like you are setting her up for failure down the road if you are starting to have conversations now about weight loss. She is a growing kid and it is quite possible that she truly is hungry after dinner and that may have nothing to do with your fear of eating out of boredom. I would suggest not projecting your fears and issues onto your kid.

I agree. Provide her with healthy food options, but don't start giving food/food-behaviours negative labels. I remember growing up with a mother who (despite being gorgeous inside and out) was always critical of herself and her size, and was always on one diet or another. I was a bigger (not overweight, but not skinny!) kid, and she constantly reminded me that I didn't want to be like her, and always commented on what/how I was eating! Not really surprising that I ended up with body and food issues!

Don't label food 'good' or 'bad' and don't lecture her on her weight. Just encourage her to be active, and remember that a balanced diet means ALL food is eaten in moderation. Also, food isn't a reward or something to treat yourself with when you have had a bad day. Try not to give food any emotional labels - its is fuel for our bodies. Delicious, delicious fuel! :P

PS: BMI's aren't accurate for children. Centile charts and specific formulas are used by doctors/nurses for children's weights

I can see why you want to stop her problem before it BECOMES a real problem (she's 6 and her weight is BORDERLINE)...but I wouldn't talk to my 6 year old about LOSING WEIGHT.........kinda sets her up for issues in my opinion.....I agree if you buy the food you are in charge....but also see why you want her to understand. When my kids want junk, I say no...if I feel an explanation is needed I say "because we need to eat healthier so we can be healthy". But I also don't like them saying anything about people needing to lose weight or being "fat" (I hate that word)........my hubby works with a guy who has recently lost over 100 pounds....my kids see him walking or at work and say "Wow! Mr. XXX is getting healthier!" (as opposed to thinner or not so big).....might also be bc my mom is pretty overweight and I would DIE if my kids talked about "fat", "chubby", "need to lose weight" or anything like that in front of her.....

Kids learn young. When I was a kid, my parents told me positives about certain foods instead of negatives. For example, instead of saying that chips were bad (which would make my inner rebel down the entire bag) they'd tell me that certain vegetables would give me beautiful skin or something. My little girl dreams of being a pretty princess ofc made me want to eat those veggies. Sometimes they'd remind me the bad effects of junk food, but most of the time, they'd feed me nutritious food and tell me cool things about them. idk, I was enticed by science.
Also, my meals as a child, and still now, were kind of in courses so I was always full. We'd have a small serving of some kind of soup before the meal so we wouldn't actually load too much up on the main. The meal itself consisted of one serving of rice + a chinese side dish, and then a dessert of fruit. Not the same mundane fruits everyday; we'd always look for exotic fruits to try to keep things interesting. Trying out all kinds of fruits/ veggies are great because they might end up loving them, and want to snack on those instead of chips and all that goodness.
Sorry for the mini rant haha... I'm going to thank my parents a million times now

Maybe, I should have made a more clearer statement.

I am NOT NOT NOT NOT telling her she needs to lose weight, or talking to her about losing weight.

I am telling her that I need to lose weight, and the health risks I can face. I encourage her to eat healthier and take to her about why it is important for her...

I am just looking to encourage her to eat healthy! She loves healthy foods..but she also loves to snack. I know I am in control of that..but I am looking for the best approaches to explain to her why she doesn't need those foods, or why we shouldnt eat them as often.

That's what I was trying to say--I don't know if a six year old can really understand that to the degree you want her to. She's used to you giving her money for chips and letting her go through packs of snacks, so it's going to be hard for her to understand why she suddenly can't do that whenever she wants anymore. When I was young, my parents made dinner for me, and that included vegetables. I may not have learned to choose vegetables on my own if my parents had not exposed me to them first. But I'm pretty sure that, as a six year old, I would not have asked for vegetables. At this stage, she may just need to get used to having treats when Mom says she can have treats, and later she'll be in a better place to question and talk to you about why treats are limited. I just think you may be asking for too much by hoping that a six year old will be able to control herself and choose healthy foods.

I understand where you're coming from, but I think you're going about it in a bit of the wrong way. 6-year-olds do not need to "lose weight." 6-year-olds need to be active, eat healthy, and avoid gaining weight, unless they are morbidly obese. Kids will eventually grow into their weight if you can help them to maintain. I have also noticed with my own daughter that her BMI will fluctuate. Sometimes she will start to look a little more "chubby," but that has always been a precursor to a big height growth spurt.

The strategies I have used successfully for my 8-year-old are:

Making her responsible for choosing to eat 3 fruits/vegetables a day. My responsibilities include providing easy-to-choose (meaning prepped and easy-to-grab) fruits and veggies.

Educating her on how our body uses food and what "healthy" eating means. I encourage her to eat protein at every meal, eat high-fat, high-carb (junk) foods sparingly. I have taught my daughter some basic things about carbs, proteins and fats, and how our bodies need a balance of these macros to function properly. I don't demonize junk food, or use it as a reward or make it "special." It's just another kind of food that we need to choose in moderation with healthy foods.

I encourage physical activity by letting her play outside for at least an hour with her neighborhood friends, and by signing her up for after-school karate. If you don't live in a neighborhood where it is safe to let your daughter play outside, you need to step up and take her to the park or for walks or bike rides daily.

I discourage boredom eating. I struggle with that myself, so if my daughter wants to snack constantly or eat immediately after a meal, I tell her that she needs to eat a fruit, veggie or protein snack like a cheese stick or ham roll-up.

I role model the behavior I would like her to acquire. I go to the gym or run on a regular basis. I eat meals that are protein, whole grain and veggie based, and eat sweets and chips and other junk in moderation.

My daughter actually has an inherently good relationship with food, so I try very hard not to micromanage her eating. I have a terribly compulsive relationship with food, and don't want to pass my unhealthy issues on to her by interfering too much.

It is great that you as a parent are stepping up and helping your child. I know whenever I see an area in my children's lives that needs worked on, I see that area in everything they do. If you try to hit it all at once it is going to overwhelm and frustrate you both. Maybe pick a goal or two to work on for the next two weeks then add another as you are working to make lifestyle choices for the both of you. Maybe this week, buy less snacks at the store and plan a walk or hike together. Then in awhile, add more fruits and veggies into the meals. Baby steps tend to stick longer then when I try to fix everything right that moment. Best wishes as you make changes for the better for you both.

She is six years old and at a very impressionable age. It sounds like you are setting her up for failure down the road if you are starting to have conversations now about weight loss. She is a growing kid and it is quite possible that she truly is hungry after dinner and that may have nothing to do with your fear of eating out of boredom. I would suggest not projecting your fears and issues onto your kid.

I agree. Provide her with healthy food options, but don't start giving food/food-behaviours negative labels. I remember growing up with a mother who (despite being gorgeous inside and out) was always critical of herself and her size, and was always on one diet or another. I was a bigger (not overweight, but not skinny!) kid, and she constantly reminded me that I didn't want to be like her, and always commented on what/how I was eating! Not really surprising that I ended up with body and food issues!

Don't label food 'good' or 'bad' and don't lecture her on her weight. Just encourage her to be active, and remember that a balanced diet means ALL food is eaten in moderation. Also, food isn't a reward or something to treat yourself with when you have had a bad day. Try not to give food any emotional labels - its is fuel for our bodies. Delicious, delicious fuel! :P

PS: BMI's aren't accurate for children. Centile charts and specific formulas are used by doctors/nurses for children's weights

This. I grew up with a mother who was obsessed by her weight, she is overweight and it dominated her life, so I became aware of weight and good vs bad food very young, and I think that was largely responsible for me developing eating problems at a young age. So I would say yes lead by example by getting yourself healthy but don't always talk too much about your own weight struggles as it will likely affect her too.

Maybe, I should have made a more clearer statement.

I am NOT NOT NOT NOT telling her she needs to lose weight, or talking to her about losing weight.

I am telling her that I need to lose weight, and the health risks I can face. I encourage her to eat healthier and take to her about why it is important for her...

I am just looking to encourage her to eat healthy! She loves healthy foods..but she also loves to snack. I know I am in control of that..but I am looking for the best approaches to explain to her why she doesn't need those foods, or why we shouldnt eat them as often.

I did ask her to be my motivation, so when I don't want to go for a walk, she pushes me to do so.

A 6-yr old does not need to be burdened with the health risks associated w/ being overweight. A 6-yr old doesn't need to worry or obsess about whether or not Mommy is going to get sick and/or die because of weight/diet issues. Emphasize "healthy" because "healthy feels better". As for the snacks, there is nothing wrong with saying "if you are still hungry after you eat your (healthy, nutritious) dinner, you may have an apple".

Maybe, I should have made a more clearer statement.

I am NOT NOT NOT NOT telling her she needs to lose weight, or talking to her about losing weight.

I am telling her that I need to lose weight, and the health risks I can face. I encourage her to eat healthier and take to her about why it is important for her...

I am just looking to encourage her to eat healthy! She loves healthy foods..but she also loves to snack. I know I am in control of that..but I am looking for the best approaches to explain to her why she doesn't need those foods, or why we shouldnt eat them as often.

I did ask her to be my motivation, so when I don't want to go for a walk, she pushes me to do so.

A 6-yr old does not need to be burdened with the health risks associated w/ being overweight. A 6-yr old doesn't need to worry or obsess about whether or not Mommy is going to get sick and/or die because of weight/diet issues. Emphasize "healthy" because "healthy feels better". As for the snacks, there is nothing wrong with saying "if you are still hungry after you eat your (healthy, nutritious) dinner, you may have an apple".

This. Don't talk to your daughter about weight, not even yours. Don't criticize your own appearance in front of her, don't talk about scary health problems you may or may not experience down the road, just don't. She doesn't need it, especially during a time when she's supposed to be GROWING. Kids go through fluctuations of being thin and plump as they grow in accordance to their changing appetites. Encourage your child to be healthy by being healthy. Keep ice cream as a special treat for Friday and remove calorie dense foods that are like it from the home if you're so worried about it. Lead by example, eat all foods in moderation, and play with her more often. Take her to the park and push her on the swing or jump rope with her in the driveway. Kids need to play just as much as they need to eat. If she finishes dinner and then wants a snack a little while later, give her something like raisins or a cut up apple and a slice of cheese (also, be very mindful of the trick that children her age do when they say they're "full" to get out of eating vegetables and then immediately afterward say they want something sweet). Build nutrition into when she's hungry instead of telling her she doesn't "need" to eat something, and if you think her constant snacking is because of boredom then make an effort to engage her more often.