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    How to not start a juice cleanse

    Posts: 4,285 Member
    edited February 18 in Food and Nutrition
    Hey guys, I'm trying to not start a juice cleanse, how do I go about doing that?? So confused here.

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    Replies

    • Posts: 39,744 Member
      ice cream.
    • Posts: 1,941 Member
      Go to macdonalds and order anything but juice. Repeat until not on a juice cleanse.
    • Posts: 547 Member
      ice cream.

      ^^^ THIS.
    • Posts: 199 Member
      Pepperoni pizza has always worked for me. That and chocolate.
    • Posts: 2,352 Member
      Coffee enemas.
    • Posts: 454 Member
      That depends, will you not be doing a vegan juice cleanse or will you not be doing a paleo version?
    • Posts: 10,477 Member
      I vote for cheese. And steak.
    • Posts: 1,682 Member
      ice cream.

      and pie.
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    • Posts: 39,744 Member
      Ok I'm so confused, I bought the juicer but now what do I do?
      dont you mean what do you NOT do?:flowerforyou:
    • Posts: 10,477 Member
      Ok I'm so confused, I bought the juicer but now what do I do?

      I can tell ya NOT to put your wang in it... but that's all I know.
    • Posts: 567 Member
      OMG people on MFP so HORRIBLE, this poor person only wants advice on how NOT to do a clense..... I heard from my friend's mother's pet dog's goldfish that it will help so don't bother trying to convince me otherwise with science or health studies.
    • Posts: 2,038 Member
      Fruitarianism leads to cleanses, so I've been told by the food industry, god I love the food industry!!!

      I.C.E. Cream Official Tester
      IKEA Professional Put Together-er
      Kickboxing Class Attender
      Been in fitness for about 2 years and have studied kitty-gif-ology, nutrition and Dinosaurs
    • Posts: 1,301 Member
      Ok I'm so confused, I bought the juicer but now what do I do?

      Find some sucker to sell the juicer to.

      Rigger
    • Posts: 3,049 Member
      Coffee enemas.
      BAHAHAH!
    • Posts: 4,064 Member
      Bean and cheese burritos
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    • Posts: 10,477 Member
      show previous quotes

      too late, wang stuck in juicer. wat do??!!?

      First, relax...
      Second, ice water...

      Shrinkage is key here.
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    • Posts: 1,941 Member
      Ok I'm so confused, I bought the juicer but now what do I do?

      Put pizza in it.

      For science.
    • Posts: 1,667 Member
      http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1234119-30-day-gelato-ice-cream-cleanse-diet

      This is an excellent cleanse for beginners.
    • Posts: 5,516 Member
      In

      For popcorn, pizza, chocolate, pie, ice cream. Let's see, what did I miss?
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    • Posts: 1,615 Member
      Do not drink juice reconstituted with contaminated water.
    • Posts: 155 Member
      show previous quotes

      First, relax...
      Second, ice water...

      Shrinkage is key here.

      Then get an appointment at one of those gender reassignment clinics. Cause you ain't any use to us anymore doll.
    • Posts: 567 Member
      God you people are so mean. All I want o do is not juice things and you're telling me things to juice. GAWD

      Your totally right, because looking out for your health is mean. May I apologise on behalf of the MFP community as an official representitive of teh interwebs.
    • Posts: 1,082 Member
      Recent forum topics actually had 'how to start a juice cleanse' and 'how not to start a juice cleanse' one after the other!

      tumblr_m4c18nD7hn1qhr47r.gif

      Well played mate!!
    • Posts: 2,132 Member
      WHY WOULD YOU NOT CLEANSE??? It detoxifies and does stuff like...like...cleans things.
    • Posts: 1,998 Member
      Hey guys, I'm trying to not start a juice cleanse, how do I go about doing that?? So confused here.
      Eat meat until you have heart disease. Remember to add some hydrogenated oils, because remember, calories is the only measurement that counts. Wrap your oil covered steak in bread, sprinkle some candy bars on top, and then melt a little mozzarella on top! At least it's not as bad for you as evil, evil sugar containing fruit.
    • Posts: 77 Member
      Wait, so you want to do something other than what Dr. Oz promotes! Your not going to be "healthy" if you go against the great and all-knowing Oz!
    This discussion has been closed.

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