rudest thing anyone has ever said about your weight?

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  • Jen61885
    Jen61885 Posts: 4 Member
    My Mom asked if I had gained weight while helping me try on my wedding dress. Still hurts....

    Oh, I'm so sorry. What a crap thing to say on such a special day. :angry:
    Hugs to you!
    :heart:


    I'm also sorry.
    Weddings are so stressful as is! That was the last thing she should've brought up that day.

    I'm sure you looked beautiful though :)

    Thanks!!
  • pipertargaryen
    pipertargaryen Posts: 303 Member
    Oh, I have a list. Sorry about how quickly this turned in to a novel-length rant.

    The first time I ever had someone be rude about my weight, I was 14. We were electing 'prince and princess' in class for our Winter Carnival. This is 11 years ago now but I remember it vividly. Now, my class was full of two kinds of people: girls I was great friends with, and guys who were jerks. What wound up happening was a) I got voted in as 'princess' (I was overweight but only like a size 10, which is a happy weight for me), and b) due to the guys being jerks, the class 'weirdo/nerd/fat boy' (who was very nice albeit socially stunted, to be fair) was voted in as 'prince'. When the results were read, several guys in my class were all, "*PIPERTARGARUYEN* CAN'T DO SURVIVOR!(a fun challenge we did with the other grades and classes with their prince and princess nominees) EW, IMAGINE HER FAT *kitten* IN A BIKINI!!" As this was junior high, obviously bathing suits were not a thing in our freakin' school Survivor. But I digress.

    I got fatter through high school, maxing at about 185, then lost a bunch of weight after graduation. My low weight was 150lbs at 5'4", approximately a size 9. By a lot of peoples' standards, that's still fat. To me, I felt and looked damned fabulous. :) That's when I started dating my boyfriend (more than 5 years ago now!). Incidentally, 5+ years later, he's still with me.

    Anyway, I went from 150 to about 160 (a weight I'd kill for now!) when a coworker, a lady in her late 50s - with no tact, noted I gained that 10lbs. Her exact words were, "Have you gained weight?" Me: "Er, some, yeah." Her: "Why? How?" At age 21, this made me SEETH. I ended up getting sent home from work, I was so baffled, disgusted, and was crying. Why on earth would you say that to someone?

    So from 2011 onwards, I fluctuated from 160 to 170 for about a year. Then some stuff happened behind my back that sent me into a deep depression. I stopped leaving my house and ballooned to 185-190ish. I then went to college (2012-2013), where sitting on my butt all week rather than running around at work made me get to my all-time high weight of 215 (as of January 1st, 2014).

    During college, I had one classmate who was obsessed with fitness. She was in one of those bikini competitions, restricted and worked out like crazy and then would binge on entire boxes of rice crispies when she couldn't handle it. Admitted she was WAY below normal, healthy weight for a girl her height. She would come over and SMELL my lunch when I bought it from the school cook. Inhaled it. Because she wouldn't let herself eat it. Whenever I wasn't around, she'd bash me, and fat people in general. Saying she didn't know how we could live with ourselves, or how we let ourselves get to that point. How fat people were disgusting. Obviously, this got back to me (my program only had 8 people, 6 of whom I considered friends, who were quick to inform me. On the bright side, she was HATED among our class!). It stung and hurt, and if she'd known about the emotional trauma I'd been through... but whatever.

    Anyway. I'm down to 187 now. I want to get to 140. I'm being healthy about it, and with workouts and such I actually feel stronger now, at this technically 'obese' weight, than I ever did at my low weight. My boyfriend still loves me. And more importantly, I love myself and think I'm a beast-machine.

    So sorry for the language, BUT **** EVERYONE ELSE who gives you crap about your weight!!!!!!!!!!
  • thepetiterunner
    thepetiterunner Posts: 1,238 Member
    "You've just always been tiny, you don't get it."

    I may have a small frame but I've not always been fit. Comments like this always undermine the fact that I work really hard to be healthy and be fit and it is a conscious choice I make at every meal, at every chance I have to work out. People assume the way you look right now, whether big or small, is the way you've always been.
  • JulieGirl58
    JulieGirl58 Posts: 158 Member
    The horrible things people say has nothing to do with you and says a great deal about them.
  • Redheadllena
    Redheadllena Posts: 353 Member
    Are you pregnant?

    Yeeep this is the worst. One time it was from a woman far far fatter than me, and she had the audacity to keep asking me if I was sure even after I'd said I wasn't... >:(
  • Redheadllena
    Redheadllena Posts: 353 Member
    I recently had an incident in a busy supermarket the other day.
    There was 3 young girls (about 16/17) behind me following me around the shop repeating over and over "oi fatty fatty fatty fatty fatty and ohhhh should you really be putting that in your basket?"
    The looks of disgust they were getting as I walked through the store was phenominal because they would turn and say it to other people too.
    I ignored them until I got to the most crowed part of the shop and then I let rip.
    I wont tell you what I said because it was horrible and I felt a little ashamed, until shoppers starting applauding.
    The girls look horrified and ran off.

    OMG I want to know what you said!!
  • AwesomeGuy37
    AwesomeGuy37 Posts: 436 Member
    Not allowed to use vulgar language on the forum... so I can't really say.
  • claudiakendall98
    claudiakendall98 Posts: 242 Member
    Think about what she has said to you and come up with snarky answers .I would be so ready for her the next time and just say something rude back to her. Ask her if she has been sleeping well lately ,if she says why tell her that her eyes are looking really baggy. Or are those pants to tight on you ,because it is cutting the air off to your brain.If she is looking for a fight just give it to her.
  • Ren_F
    Ren_F Posts: 20
    I had to take a jogging class in college, which wasn't easy for me... I was never athletic and I was chubby. For the final we had to run a set distance. Bad enough I was out of shape and heavy, the run was at 8AM class on a Friday and I was pledging my sorority and had been out all night. After finishing my run with a pathetic time the coach said, "You pretty good... for such a large girl." Ouch! (though I did get a 'B')
  • california_haley
    california_haley Posts: 220 Member
    When i was smaller, and totally healthy, lift weights and stuff. i was told by complete strangers things like
    "god eat a cheeseburger"
    "you remind me of skeletor"
    "you're too small its unhealthy"
    ect.ect.ect.
  • krawhitham
    krawhitham Posts: 831 Member
    Oy, I feel your pain. I used to date a very slim guy, and all his friends were super fit, rock climbing, competitive rowing, half marathon running gay dudes. Being the fat guy in that group was pretty obnoxious sometimes. Honestly, it's part of my motivation for losing.

    The first time around i did this for me and it meant that much more to me when i succeeded. I have been struggling to devoting more time but i feel like im back where i need to be. I just wondered if anyone else ever felt like they needed to lose weight to show up all the rude people who put them down.

    Im slowly turning into an athletic person. it makes a difference for sure.

    I have to say, though I don't like to admit, a LOT of my reason for wanting to lose 50 lbs is to feel like I need to show up all of the rude people I used to work with. Though I'll probably never see them again, I feel like it gives me a personal satisfaction.
  • MisterIncredible
    MisterIncredible Posts: 8 Member
    1. I was told that I "looked like that one actor. You know, the FAT one! What's his name?" (This has happened more than once.)

    2. Back when I was a DJ at a school dance in the late 90's, a girl told me, "You remind me of the chunky Backstreet Boy." (On one hand, I looked like a Backstreet Boy. On the other hand, she made sure she mentioned the "chunky" one.)

    3. Back in high school I was interested in a girl and one of my friends was her next door neighbor and had known her since birth, so I asked him to talk me up to her. He said to her, "Do you know Eric? You know, my friend that is short, has a big nose and a spare tire?" (I later became friends with her and she told me this.)

    For the record, these all make me laugh now, but back then it kind of hurt.
  • Wanting3
    Wanting3 Posts: 48
    "You could be really pretty if you lost weight." Uh is that supposed to be a compliment?
  • postrockandcats
    postrockandcats Posts: 1,145 Member
    Not rude so much as galling:

    My father's former girlfriend said "oh my goodness! Don't you want a man? You'll never get a man if you're fat!!"

    I was 12. TWELVE. The amount of wrong here is overwhelming.
  • Okapi42
    Okapi42 Posts: 495 Member
    Fortunately, I was never really huge, just the wrong side of obese with a 34 inch waist. And yet, a stewardess offered me a seat belt extender...
  • lenac87
    lenac87 Posts: 383 Member
    When I was in nursing school I went to Kenya for a service learning trip and while in one of the hospitals there I was going about my day and it was time for "tea time" where everyone stops what they are doing and go drink tea and have cookies for a few minutes and some people had already made a few uncomfortable comments during the day so I decided not to have any, I just sat there quietly and then one of the employees came in with a pair of scrubs that had to be 4x or 5x held them up in front of everybody (all complete strangers) and said I should go put them on because they would fit better than the scrubs I was wearing. I was mortified! Luckily one of the women saw that it had upset me and pulled me aside while I balled my eyes out. I was 5'7 and about 215lbs at the time and heavy but I wasn't pouring out of my scrubs or anything, I wore a size XL and it wasn't baggy but it wasn't uncomfortable tight either. I can't imagine what they would say about me now at my current weight! I know there are cultural differences but I think it went a little to far. The rest of the trip was amazing though! And I met some amazing people :)
  • A woman pointed at me and said out loud to her friend... "If I ever look like that, kill me."
  • pipertargaryen
    pipertargaryen Posts: 303 Member

    2. Back when I was a DJ at a school dance in the late 90's, a girl told me, "You remind me of the chunky Backstreet Boy." (On one hand, I looked like a Backstreet Boy. On the other hand, she made sure she mentioned the "chunky" one.)

    I know that for you personally, this was a ****ty thing, but as someone whose first purchased album, at age 6, was the BSB, I am laughing SO hard (while feeling bad that people are jerks).
  • AiHanks
    AiHanks Posts: 4
    In freshman year of high school, I was riding the bus and two male seniors moved up several seats closer to me and started making comments about my weight. I tried to ignore them by texting someone, but one of them kept pinching me in the arms and my side, and the other kept trying to close my phone on me. I don't remember so much of what they said, but I do remember them asking if I was pregnant, saying how fat I was, and calling me a "little slut". At that time I was only 130 lbs.

    A few years later in my junior year I also received a 5 page letter from a 'friend' stating how fat and ugly I was - among other hurtful things. The 'friend' later came up with excuses like his email got hacked, his cousin sent it, he was tired, etc, before admitting that he did send it.

    I also receive quite a bit internet hate from people I don't know. I had to turn off anonymous asks on one of my tumblr blogs because I kept receiving messages telling me that I was fat and ugly, that I should kill myself, etc. I also came across a post on someone's blog where 98% of their posts were directed at me - and not in a good way. But I did learn that I am apparently a "Fat retarded hippo" so that was nice to find out. *sarcasm*
  • krawhitham
    krawhitham Posts: 831 Member
    I don't think I had any comments about my weight until I got a job with abusive bosses which started in 2010 and ended in 2013.

    They called me "chubby" while taking a group photo saying "you stand with the chubby girls because all the skinnies are on the left"

    I am allergic to many foods, and one of the bosses said "yeah right, you'd never know you were allergic to anything!" basically saying that I was so fat there's no way I limit my diet.

    After making a passing comment about how I didn't want to have my own children, my boss said that I had no reason to be so vain about my body (insinuating that child bearing would ruin a women's body) because I was fat anyway.

    CONSTANT comments about food choices - even if it was a healthy food choice. Constant criticism about what and how much I ate.

    Thank goodness I was laid off before the holidays last year, working there was so psychologically abusive!
  • tiggerhammon
    tiggerhammon Posts: 2,211 Member
    Yea, I would have gotten after my husband for not standing up for me probably.

    Worst experience I had was a really (and I mean REALLY) good looking guy come up to me and say, "wow! You are so beautiful. It is too bad you are fat, if you could just fix that you would totally be a 10!" ... and then walked off.
  • Aeramis13
    Aeramis13 Posts: 135 Member
    reading here just reminds me how much people SUCK.

    I've had people make comments that made me feel ****ty about my weight, but i've been lucky that they've only been indirect. if you say something fully about my weight to me, we're likely to meet fists. and i'm a chick who doesn't like violence.

    just this week, i met with a physical trainer at a hospital/health service company who I told that i had lost 50+ lbs. and that i run a lot and plan to continue further (which is why i was there to have my gait analyzed - my left leg hurts when i run so i wanted to know why) and he said something like "I assume you're not done yet" and I decided to take it as a compliment...that if I'd bothered to put in the work so far, i would wanna keep going...and i do. The old me would have been super duper offended, but i decided to take it as the health advice it was meant to be.

    And he's right. I've got so long to go with my health. I hope to eventually squat above 300 (currently at 145) and run at least a 5k in 25 mins (if i really killed myself, i might be able to do 32 minutes, maybe), not to mention I'd love to knock my BF% down by about 10%.

    In my adult life i haven't heard anything directly to me. I did once hear some crappy comment at the gym this year, but it actually was a compliment to me and a negative to a lady near me (some sort of she's the "pre" and I'm the "post" and I was pissed on her behalf and grateful on my behalf) but I didn't actually see who said it, just heard it behind me so I didn't make it a thing.

    I often take over the single squat rack in my small gym and see a lot of looks about a 'weak' woman taking over the lifting equipment for a while and can't wait for some *kitten* to say something quietly so i can loudly make them look like an *kitten*, but it hasn't happened just yet.

    anyways, you all are AWESOME. keep doing what you're doing. DO IT.

    when i started this, i was told the best thing anyone could ever tell someone when doing this:

    This will likely be the most selfish thing you've ever done. SELFISH. You will focus on yourself in a way that you've never done. You will think about how you eat, look, feel. You will focus on it. You will learn to listen to yourself, your body, your everything. And it will be great. You will feel awesome, but even better, your selfishness will mean that you can offer more of yourself to those in your life. The end result of your selfishness is the opposite. You will participate more in others lives. You will be more than willing to go on adventures, you will smile for photos when people want to see you, you will say yes to that bike ride, yes to that 5k, yes to whatever life throws at you because you finally realize you are awesome.

    SO BE SELFISH. F* the A*holes in the meantime. Own This. Own Yourself. Get it. YOU ARE WORTH IT.
  • onmyway57
    onmyway57 Posts: 22
    Ok so I am in Memphis TN and u southern girls don't talk about weight so for sure she is not one of us....We call girls like me Healthy LOL
  • Someone said i would never get a job unless I lost weight. That hurt me because I am having trouble finding work and for that to be said just hit me really hard.
  • a kid once pointed at my partner's belly and asked her "is there a baby in there or just food?"
  • Dschnei475
    Dschnei475 Posts: 129 Member
    I get you would be so beautiful if you lost Weight all the time. Also you should really get that lap band surgery. All from family.
  • CharleePear
    CharleePear Posts: 1,948 Member
    I wasn't a big kid at all but on a hike my teacher commented that it was going to be good for me, help me to get slimmer, I was 7 from then the hits just kept coming, Mum, pointing out my weight, my little extra around the middle, which is how my body just is...I have had people yell at me in the street calling me heifer (female cow), and pig, spitting on me, I have had people tell me how I shouldn't be allowed to wear a swimsuit when I was a teen...I was then 58kg with an eating disorder (I never got very low in weight). I had a husband that would buy me weight loss kits for my birthday, workout gear for my christmas present, and boxing gear for another birthday, I wasn't really into any of that much back then. a couple of years into marriage I was eating out of spite and putting on weight from anti-depressants before that didn't help...I have had people tell me I can't possible fit this or that cos I am so fat, I have had soooo many people ask when my due date was. I have had heaps of people describe as the fat friend, men in clubs say nasty things to me. So apparently I am supposed to have a healthy view on my body...It's hard to believe you are beautiful when it's been a life long time of people telling you how big you are even when you aren't
  • mayancoh
    mayancoh Posts: 56 Member
    A lady at work asked me if I was pregnant!! I wanted to die…. My husband and I got married almost a year ago and here in Israel some people expect you to go ahead and have kids right away… I was mortified
  • megsta91
    megsta91 Posts: 92 Member
    my WITCH of a sister in law, who is about 40lbs heavier than me, asked if I was comfortable with how large my thighs are.

    i responded with "i'm comfortable enough to know not to dip my nose into other peoples business"

    the first and only comment she said about my weight.
  • siqiniq
    siqiniq Posts: 237 Member
    A patient of mine that i had seen at the beginning of last year in January came back around October or so. I probably had gained 6 kgs or so because i just had a miscarriage. I dont think i was fat. I weighed 59 kg at the new weight. She told me ''O girly youre so fat i didnt even recognize you, what are you eating''. I think its very rude when people just say things without thinking. I was going through something and she had no idea. And most of the time there is a good reason why someone is gaining. Whether shes comfort eating. Whatever.

    And by the way, she was HUGE. But i didnt judge her!

    Oh yes you did. You judged her by writing this comment about her.
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