Do you feel it is important to sleep with your spouse?

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Replies

  • edisonsbulb
    edisonsbulb Posts: 93 Member
    depends on how you feel about being glorified roomates.
    I believe you mean "roommates with incredibly sporadic benefits"
  • Ilikelamps
    Ilikelamps Posts: 482 Member
    I do not sleep well if my husband isn't in the bed. When I have insomnia, I find that if we're touching or spooning, I can fall asleep. Once asleep though, I like my own space. That's why we have a king bed.

    spooning leads to forking

    forking leads to eating...or wait is that before forking?
  • _lyndseybrooke_
    _lyndseybrooke_ Posts: 2,561 Member
    Absolutely. Sleeping in separate rooms is like the kiss of death - it can only go downhill from there. Taking closeness and intimacy out of a relationship is bad news in general.
  • GreatGreenSea
    GreatGreenSea Posts: 47 Member
    I feel it is. I know I couldn't sleep without my big, warm husband next to me, and some days, that's the only time we get to spend together.
  • BusyRaeNOTBusty
    BusyRaeNOTBusty Posts: 7,166 Member
    My husband works graveyard on occasion and I do miss when he's not in the bed. I also don't like king size beds because we are too far away from each other (we aren't big people). But I don't know that I'd say married couples HAVE to share a bed all the time.

    My 7 year old was just asking me the other day if she HAD to share a room if she got married (she shares with her sister now).
  • MapleFlavouredMaiden
    MapleFlavouredMaiden Posts: 595 Member
    Yes because morning wood.
  • WendyTerry420
    WendyTerry420 Posts: 13,274 Member
    No, this isn't a thread about sex. It is about sharing the same bed to sleep. Do you feel it is important?

    For my husband and me, it is. We were not able to sleep together for several months at our old house because there was not access to heat in our bedroom and the landlord wouldn't fix it. We were finally able to move, but it drove us crazy. He was on the couch, and I was on a cot. It did affect our intimacy, even though we were in the same room. We like to cuddle together.
  • BigBellyGoAway
    BigBellyGoAway Posts: 781 Member
    Yes because morning wood.

    I'm slightly less attracted to you now. :laugh:
  • germanveg
    germanveg Posts: 15
    Yes, it is for us. My husband is the insistent one, he gets slightly annoyed if I don't go to bed at the same time as him (I'm a total night owl and he goes to bed at 10).

    I do like having him next to me but his snoring drives me insane and I would get much better sleep if we had separate rooms. When he's gone for business my dog sleeps on his side and she's a much better/quieter sleeping companion!
  • MireyGal76
    MireyGal76 Posts: 7,334 Member
    if you don't share the same bed... how to you have middle of the night wake up loving?

    I love being held, or snuggling as I fall asleep. I love waking up in the middle of the night and feeling their warmth beside me. I love waking up in the morning next to someone that I love.

    It's what I miss most now that I'm on my own.
  • RaspberryKeytoneBoondoggle
    RaspberryKeytoneBoondoggle Posts: 1,349 Member
    It's important to me, and I get grumpy when I think about sleeping alone if my husband goes away. However I know couples who don't sleep together and that is quite all right also, and like you said, has nothing to do with sex.
  • wolfsbayne
    wolfsbayne Posts: 3,116 Member
    if you don't share the same bed... how to you have middle of the night wake up loving?

    I love being held, or snuggling as I fall asleep. I love waking up in the middle of the night and feeling their warmth beside me. I love waking up in the morning next to someone that I love.

    It's what I miss most now that I'm on my own.

    this, too. When I get back into bed after letting the dogs out at 530 am, he lifts the covers so I can get close to him, puts his arm around me and pulls me close to spoon for a little while before we get up. The absolute best! If we don't do that, my whole attitude for the day is shot.
  • nikki0753
    nikki0753 Posts: 383 Member
    I wouldn't say its 'important' but why would you not share a bed? I would be pretty upset if my bf wanted to sleep somewhere else.
  • Iceberg_Simpson
    Iceberg_Simpson Posts: 737 Member
    I do not sleep well if my husband isn't in the bed. When I have insomnia, I find that if we're touching or spooning, I can fall asleep. Once asleep though, I like my own space. That's why we have a king bed.

    spooning leads to forking


    Nothing wrong with that. :)
  • serena569
    serena569 Posts: 427 Member
    I think it's important to go to bed in the same bed at the same time. That being said, I often get up after he falls asleep.
  • sunshinesquared
    sunshinesquared Posts: 2,733 Member
    My husband works night shift so I get the best of both worlds!! (btw I sleep better when he isn't there but don't tell him that!!)

    This!!!
  • BinaryPulsar
    BinaryPulsar Posts: 8,927 Member
    It is very difficult for me to sleep when my husband is not there. I stay awake until he is in the bed. Initially, 16 years ago, it was difficult for me to not sleep alone. But then my comfort level completely shifted. I feel happy when he is there.

    Also want to add that when we were in college we slept in a twin sized bed together. And it was nice. Now we have a queen bed. When he is away for work, I still sleep with the space there for him.
  • MapleFlavouredMaiden
    MapleFlavouredMaiden Posts: 595 Member
    Yes because morning wood.

    I'm slightly less attracted to you now. :laugh:

    HIS morning wood, not mine... jeez! What's the lady equivalent of morning wood? Morning swamp? Morning dew? Morning slip and slide?
  • SweetTrouble_
    SweetTrouble_ Posts: 933 Member
    Yes, I prefer to sleep on my spouse.
  • jennycjenny
    jennycjenny Posts: 15 Member
    I sprawl out like a starfish in my giant king sized bed by myself. I like my space for sleeping. S.O. is free to invade my space for other things ;) but leave me alone for sleep time!
  • RINat612
    RINat612 Posts: 251 Member
    Been married 10 years and ever since year 2, I've slept in a different bed/bedroom. It has done wonders for our relationship as my wife is a very light sleeper and I am a huge snorer. Also I go to bed way after her and am also a big night time reader. Like till 2AM sometimes. Or later...
  • LeilaFace
    LeilaFace Posts: 390 Member
    I have a really hard time falling asleep without my husband... My dogs are a poor substitute... hahahaha. We have a going to sleep routine and it's ridiculous and I love it. When he's out of town I often get insomnia.
  • fbmandy55
    fbmandy55 Posts: 5,263 Member
    Yes, very important. Mind snores but I eventually fall asleep when I am tired enough. He goes to work at 3am and I don't even notice it anymore!
  • fbmandy55
    fbmandy55 Posts: 5,263 Member
    Been married 10 years and ever since year 2, I've slept in a different bed/bedroom. It has done wonders for our relationship as my wife is a very light sleeper and I am a huge snorer. Also I go to bed way after her and am also a big night time reader. Like till 2AM sometimes. Or later...

    So when you get it on do you have to choose a bedroom first? :laugh:
  • RaeLB
    RaeLB Posts: 1,216 Member
    My parents sleep in separate beds because my dad is a major snorer and my mom has chronic pain in her shoulder and back and needs lots of room and a good sleep. They seem to be happily married.

    This is not a general yes or no question as all couples are unique - different strokes for different folks!
  • AusAshMommy
    AusAshMommy Posts: 845 Member
    My hubby & I don't go to bed together (at the same time, he likes to stay up late enough to wait for me to fall asleep) BUT I just don't sleep well unless he's in bed with me, once I am asleep if he spend the night on the couch (because like a dolt he's fallen asleep out there) I'll wake up in the middle of the night and not sleep well...
  • TheRealParisLove
    TheRealParisLove Posts: 1,907 Member
    I do share a bed with my spouse, but that is because we only have one bedroom. When we lived in a larger place, I would sometimes sleep alone because we were on different schedules. Also, he used to snore quite loudly, but that isn't much of an issue now that he has lost weight. But, I would sleep in the guest room on a regular basis because of his snoring.

    I don't think separate bedrooms is a hallmark of a loveless marriage. I also take separate vacations from my husband. It gives us something to talk about later. :smile:
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
    It's becoming pretty common for married people not only to sleep separately but to live in separate residences and they seem to be happy that way.

    I prefer sleeping next to my SO. We're cuddlers, too, so we're pretty much always touching. But everyone is different and has different priorities.
  • Karissa_Clohan
    Karissa_Clohan Posts: 126 Member
    My husband and I sleep in separate beds, but typically in the same room. He wakes up very easily and I move around too much in the middle of the night... so I'm constantly waking him up. We've found it easier to have different beds. We also disagree on room temperature (which is a complete deal breaker for me) so whenever he starts cranking up the heater, I move out to the living room with the cats. If it's been a long day, then we might have a little sexy time and take a nap together after - excellent stress reliever!

    The only exception to our sleeping habits is when we're away from home. I absolutely cannot sleep in a new place without my husband in bed with me. He just has to deal with my cuddles, drooling, and potential snoring until we return home :p

    My sister makes fun of us because we're newly weds yet have the sleeping arrangements of an elderly couple. :p In total honesty, where I sleep doesn't have too much of an effect on how close I feel to my spouse. We get our lovey-dovey moments in during my conscious hours - and that's good enough for me :)
  • RINat612
    RINat612 Posts: 251 Member
    Been married 10 years and ever since year 2, I've slept in a different bed/bedroom. It has done wonders for our relationship as my wife is a very light sleeper and I am a huge snorer. Also I go to bed way after her and am also a big night time reader. Like till 2AM sometimes. Or later...

    So when you get it on do you have to choose a bedroom first? :laugh:

    Not really. It's pretty much understood that happens at her bed :happy:

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