Perfect Mistress

TheRoadDog
TheRoadDog Posts: 11,788 Member
in Chit-Chat
Me and a couple guys I ride with took a poll of what attributes make up the perfect mistress, and now they are rolling it into a contest to find the area's "perfect mistress". So let me know if you meet the following...we can split the prizes:
- Redhead
- Green Eyes
- 5 foot 6 inches tall
- 140 pounds
- Has Curves in all the right places
- Looks good on the back of my Bike in Leather and Lace
- Likes include: Cigars, Bourbon, Dominant Biker Types
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Replies

  • DainaLC
    DainaLC Posts: 18,937 Member
    I think we just won this one! Perfect description! :flowerforyou:
  • reddz12
    reddz12 Posts: 350 Member
    I'm a brunette with dyed red hair
    green/hazle eys
    5'5
    I'm working on the weight part :-)
    I used to have the right curves! I WILL GET THEM BACK
    mmmm Harley girl for life......
    Bourbon is my drink of choice, love the rough and tumble of a biker man and I love the smell of cigars although I do not smoke them.
  • ModoVincere
    ModoVincere Posts: 530 Member
    I'm a simple guy...
    She just needs to be breathing.
  • rich347
    rich347 Posts: 508 Member
    I think the "Perfect Mistress" is a woman that knows her place lol.....I mean am I right?
  • MizTerry
    MizTerry Posts: 3,763 Member
    I like leather. :bigsmile:
  • Sovi_
    Sovi_ Posts: 575 Member
    I'm wife material only. No since in not being able to cash in on life insurance.


    Or did you mean Mistress as in LICK MY BOOTS?
  • rustyvicinie
    rustyvicinie Posts: 63 Member
    hmmm would need to share my bourbon and cigars... let me think about that one.
  • reddz12
    reddz12 Posts: 350 Member
    @rich347 knows her place is one thing, but holds her own makes it fun :wink:
  • SezxyStef
    SezxyStef Posts: 15,267 Member
    Me and a couple guys I ride with took a poll of what attributes make up the perfect mistress, and now they are rolling it into a contest to find the area's "perfect mistress". So let me know if you meet the following...we can split the prizes:
    - Redhead
    - Green Eyes
    - 5 foot 6 inches tall
    - 140 pounds
    - Has Curves in all the right places
    - Looks good on the back of my Bike in Leather and Lace
    - Likes include: Cigars, Bourbon, Dominant Biker Types

    blonde but can dye my hair
    Blue eyes but can get colored contacts
    1 inch too tall..no heels I guess
    157lbs...but don't look it
    very curvy
    I look great on the back of a bike esp in lace...leather perhaps
    I love the smell of cigars and bourbon...
    Likes dominant men but we will be scrapping lots...


    wait sounds like the mom from Son's of anarchy...
  • kendall916
    kendall916 Posts: 4,222 Member
    - Redhead :Brunette
    - Green Eyes : amber
    - 5 foot 6 inches tall : 4 foot 11
    - 140 pounds : 120 pounds
    - Has Curves in all the right places : definite yes on the curves
    - Looks good on the back of my Bike in Leather and Lace : Lemme have a 'test run' to find out
    - Likes include: Cigars, Bourbon, Dominant Biker Types no

    Results -Insert Price is Right fail chime-
  • American_Made
    American_Made Posts: 169
    I'm a brunette with dyed red hair
    green/hazle eys
    5'5
    I'm working on the weight part :-)
    I used to have the right curves! I WILL GET THEM BACK
    mmmm Harley girl for life......
    Bourbon is my drink of choice, love the rough and tumble of a biker man and I love the smell of cigars although I do not smoke them.

    Perfect woman!
  • bigphatcat
    bigphatcat Posts: 7,843 Member
    ....one more thing for perfect mistress....She can suck a golf ball through a garden hose
  • jessilyn76
    jessilyn76 Posts: 532 Member
    I always thought that all guys were REALLY looking for in a perfect mistress was a warm hole......?

    Eh, shows what I know.
  • tlcarolinagirl
    tlcarolinagirl Posts: 1,700 Member
    Me and a couple guys I ride with took a poll of what attributes make up the perfect mistress, and now they are rolling it into a contest to find the area's "perfect mistress". So let me know if you meet the following...we can split the prizes:
    - Redhead
    - Green Eyes
    - 5 foot 6 inches tall
    - 140 pounds
    - Has Curves in all the right places
    - Looks good on the back of my Bike in Leather and Lace
    - Likes include: Cigars, Bourbon, Dominant Biker Types

    I got 1/7...although I make a better FWB... ;)
  • Mischievous_Rascal
    Mischievous_Rascal Posts: 1,791 Member
    Damn, an inch short and three pounds light...whatcha gonna do?
  • DamePiglet
    DamePiglet Posts: 3,730 Member
    ....one more thing for perfect mistress....She can suck a golf ball through a garden hose

    this guy has it right.

    let's face it... the "perfect" mistress doesn't expect a ride on the back of a bike.
    And we're all about the same height when we're horizontal. Js.
  • ScorpionQwean
    ScorpionQwean Posts: 1,013 Member
    Hello! :happy: ; however, I can't be a mistress.... just a wife only :tongue:
  • American_Made
    American_Made Posts: 169
    im taking applications haha
  • maab_connor
    maab_connor Posts: 3,927 Member
    I'm a simple guy...
    She just needs to be breathing.

    so picky.
  • Riffraft1960
    Riffraft1960 Posts: 1,984 Member
    Me and a couple guys I ride with took a poll of what attributes make up the perfect mistress, and now they are rolling it into a contest to find the area's "perfect mistress". So let me know if you meet the following...we can split the prizes:
    - Redhead
    - Green Eyes
    - 5 foot 6 inches tall
    - 140 pounds
    - Has Curves in all the right places
    - Looks good on the back of my Bike in Leather and Lace
    - Likes include: Cigars, Bourbon, Dominant Biker Types

    So you want Christina Hendricks, not a bad choice
  • srmchan
    srmchan Posts: 206 Member
    Me and a couple guys I ride with took a poll of what attributes make up the perfect mistress, and now they are rolling it into a contest to find the area's "perfect mistress". So let me know if you meet the following...we can split the prizes:
    - Redhead
    - Green Eyes
    - 5 foot 6 inches tall
    - 140 pounds
    - Has Curves in all the right places
    - Looks good on the back of my Bike in Leather and Lace
    - Likes include: Cigars, Bourbon, Dominant Biker Types

    Sounds a lot like my wife... with a few exceptions. She's a blue-eyed redhead, prefers wine to bourbon, not much for smoking but loves when I cook on my smoker, and her preferred mode of transportation is by horse or in a Corvette. She's a good one (meaning the wife, not the Corvette), so I reckon I'll keep her.

    Good luck in your search. If you find a good redhead, hang on tight.
  • funforsports
    funforsports Posts: 2,656 Member
    They just have to look good and act bad.
  • chelstakencharge
    chelstakencharge Posts: 1,021 Member
    if she were really perfect wouldn't she be your wife?
  • Galatea_Stone
    Galatea_Stone Posts: 2,037 Member
    Yes,
    Yes,
    inch too tall
    125
    damn skippy
    yes, but better in a convertible
    yes, YES, and meh.

    For the record, the minute you get bored with her, even if she meets all that criteria, she sets your bike on fire and tells on you.
  • Mia_RagazzaTosta
    Mia_RagazzaTosta Posts: 4,885 Member
    Me no share
  • Me2FitMe
    Me2FitMe Posts: 1,285 Member
    - Redhead (nope)
    - Green Eyes (nope)
    - 5 foot 6 inches tall (def not!)
    - 140 pounds (close)
    - Has Curves in all the right places (quite possible)
    - Looks good on the back of my Bike in Leather and Lace (quite possible)
    - Likes include: Cigars, Bourbon, Dominant Biker Types (nope, sure, sure)

    .... Hmmm
  • SugarBaby71
    SugarBaby71 Posts: 3,630 Member
    Finally something I can work with... :love:

    Okay so I'm brunette, but I've been thinking red would be fun for summer... I have brown eyes, but I'm so great you won't care.
    I am 5'6"
    A gentleman would never ask my weight
    I think I've got the curves covered
    I've been known to share a cigar:smokin: ... I've been known to have a bourbon:drinker: ... and I'm fascinated with the dominant biker types:wink: ..
  • LC458
    LC458 Posts: 300 Member
    wow this is getting crazy! I think I'm gonna create my own too...

    Perfect Carnival Operator

    8a7as.gifvia Imgflip GIF Maker
  • _crafty_
    _crafty_ Posts: 1,682 Member
    Me no share

    :flowerforyou:
  • TheRoadDog
    TheRoadDog Posts: 11,788 Member
    Damn, an inch short and three pounds light...whatcha gonna do?

    Nothing a pair of heels and a sandwich can't cure.

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