One free night a year

Options
12346

Replies

  • danahubley
    danahubley Posts: 40 Member
    Options
    I think my (almost ex) husband did this but forgot to ask for the pass.

    Yep.
  • resistance_freak
    resistance_freak Posts: 899
    Options
    Never. And I know he would say the same. My opinion is that if you feel you need to be with someone else, ever, then your marriage has serious problems and is probably already over.

    I don't judge others' relationships though, so whatever works for them.

    I like how in the first paragraph you judged another's relationship and then in closing you explained how you don't judge.
  • Sinisterly
    Sinisterly Posts: 10,913 Member
    Options
    Why just one night? Psh
  • George_Baileys_Ghost
    George_Baileys_Ghost Posts: 1,524 Member
    Options
    Different STROKES for different folks, right?

    Are you hittin on me?
  • Guns_N_Buns
    Guns_N_Buns Posts: 1,899 Member
    Options
    this thread is interesting...it seems to be fairly common to think that having an open marriage means something is wrong with the marriage and/or there is no love there.

    there are PLENNNNTY of couples that happily and successfully engage in open relationships, swapping, additional partners, and a myriad of other activities considered nontraditional.

    the fact that this is so taboo and equates to not loving the other person is just archaic.

    Marriage is between two people. Not three, not four. TWO.

    If an individual cannot be/does not want to be with one person, there is absolutely no point in getting married.

    This concept of an open marriage is obviously too adult for you to handle

    lmao! I was thinking the same thing. Obviously, age plays a very big role in this (i.e. experience). I agree with the first comment of this sequence of those quoted: it's very taboo and doesn't necessarily determine that the two don't love each other. I think humans are very sexual creatures and suppressing that generally exacerbates those needs making tensions/resentment rise in the relationship. Many say that their spouse fulfills those needs 100% and that's great. I don't have an open relationship, but I can see where it could fit into one's lifestyle. Those who oppose it outright I think just can't fathom a relationship of love along with other partners that are purely for sex. I, myself, like the crazy, passionate sex which generally requires love (and/or emotion of some sort) and can't see rocking another man's world without him falling in love with me. (haha wink wink) So, I stay monogamous.
  • Madame_Goldbricker
    Madame_Goldbricker Posts: 1,625 Member
    Options
    Be a bit depressing if they turned out to have sexual dysfunction.... Better luck next year I guess.
  • Jenni129
    Jenni129 Posts: 692 Member
    Options
    charlton-heston-laugh.gif
  • FitWithWit44
    FitWithWit44 Posts: 412 Member
    Options
    Different STROKES for different folks, right?

    willis.gif
  • jasonmh630
    jasonmh630 Posts: 2,850 Member
    Options
    My opinion: If you're seeking sexual/romantic gratification from someone OTHER than your wife/SO, then you're cheating. I don't care if it's "approved" by the spouse... If you truly cared for and loved your spouse, you wouldn't want to be with ANYONE else.

    Disagree. Then again, I don't buy into the idea of being only able to love one person at a time. Just because you love and marry someone, doesn't mean you can't love other people too.

    I respect your opinion... But loving someone and being IN love with someone are two totally different animals. Being IN love dictates that you are committed to and loyal to that person you are in love with. I've seen people try things like this and/or open relationships, and 95% of the time, it ruins both relationships.

    If this steps on any toes, I apologize. This is just my opinion that the failures outweighs the successes.
  • RINat612
    RINat612 Posts: 251 Member
    Options
    Oh Hail NO.

    This.
  • kristen2713
    kristen2713 Posts: 253 Member
    Options
    Oh Hail NO.

    In -- I'd love to say I'm "adult enough" to say SURE!!!! But...:explode: :noway:
  • firfeous
    firfeous Posts: 196 Member
    Options
    So I just read an article that says that NBA player Andre Kirilenko has a deal with his wife where they each get one free night a year to be with someone else. Would you ever do that with your spouse/partner?

    My SO could do that....as long as I can join him and her...
  • UsedToBeHusky
    UsedToBeHusky Posts: 15,229 Member
    Options
    Never. And I know he would say the same. My opinion is that if you feel you need to be with someone else, ever, then your marriage has serious problems and is probably already over.

    I don't judge others' relationships though, so whatever works for them.

    Judging others by not judging others. That takes talent!
  • UsedToBeHusky
    UsedToBeHusky Posts: 15,229 Member
    Options
    Also it's not the same circumstances as you or me, this guy is a millionaire with women throwing themselves at him. If he only does it once a year, I would be surprised!

    This is like the whole moderation thing. By allowing it once a year, the temptation is lessened. You know, you skip the office doughnuts so that you can have that creme brulee after dinner.
  • madhatter2013
    madhatter2013 Posts: 1,547 Member
    Options
    this thread is interesting...it seems to be fairly common to think that having an open marriage means something is wrong with the marriage and/or there is no love there.

    there are PLENNNNTY of couples that happily and successfully engage in open relationships, swapping, additional partners, and a myriad of other activities considered nontraditional.

    the fact that this is so taboo and equates to not loving the other person is just archaic.

    demotivation.us_Hey-I-like-you_130902161313.jpg
  • UsedToBeHusky
    UsedToBeHusky Posts: 15,229 Member
    Options
    Also it's not the same circumstances as you or me, this guy is a millionaire with women throwing themselves at him. If he only does it once a year, I would be surprised!

    This is like the whole moderation thing. By allowing it once a year, the temptation is lessened. You know, you skip the office doughnuts so that you can have that creme brulee after dinner.
    but apparently you had the target all year though...so what does that say?

    I'm confused by what you are asking. Obviously, if he gets to go outside of his marriage once a year, he is going to choose a high caliber individual, and not just your average basketball groupie.
  • UsedToBeHusky
    UsedToBeHusky Posts: 15,229 Member
    Options
    Also it's not the same circumstances as you or me, this guy is a millionaire with women throwing themselves at him. If he only does it once a year, I would be surprised!

    This is like the whole moderation thing. By allowing it once a year, the temptation is lessened. You know, you skip the office doughnuts so that you can have that creme brulee after dinner.
    but apparently you had the target all year though...so what does that say?

    I'm confused by what you are asking. Obviously, if he gets to go outside of his marriage once a year, he is going to choose a high caliber individual, and not just your average basketball groupie.
    meaning you are thinking about it well in advance of the free day, therefore, you are setting it up etc got to have a little convo etc....etc...

    Well yeah... I can't ever remember a time when I just spontaneously had creme brulee...
  • UsedToBeHusky
    UsedToBeHusky Posts: 15,229 Member
    Options
    Also it's not the same circumstances as you or me, this guy is a millionaire with women throwing themselves at him. If he only does it once a year, I would be surprised!

    This is like the whole moderation thing. By allowing it once a year, the temptation is lessened. You know, you skip the office doughnuts so that you can have that creme brulee after dinner.
    but apparently you had the target all year though...so what does that say?

    I'm confused by what you are asking. Obviously, if he gets to go outside of his marriage once a year, he is going to choose a high caliber individual, and not just your average basketball groupie.
    meaning you are thinking about it well in advance of the free day, therefore, you are setting it up etc got to have a little convo etc....etc...

    Well yeah... I can't ever remember a time when I just spontaneously had creme brulee...
    well I mean, Id atleast like to know how it was made........ya know.


    point being......aren't you cheating if you are talking about it before it happens, whether its cheating the significant other out of time or whatever.

    You can call it whatever you want. It doesn't really matter if you consider it cheating or if it actually is cheating. The reality is that his SO has decided that it won't affect their marriage, whether you consider it cheating or not, and in the end, that is all that should really matter to him, right? How his behavior affects his marriage and NOT people's opinions... right?
  • RINat612
    RINat612 Posts: 251 Member
    Options
    I failed the sharing part of Kindergarten.

    I don't share my wife. Not now, not ever.
  • KseRz
    KseRz Posts: 980 Member
    Options
    So I just read an article that says that NBA player Andre Kirilenko has a deal with his wife where they each get one free night a year to be with someone else. Would you ever do that with your spouse/partner?

    My SO could do that....as long as I can join him and her...

    hDCF62237

Categories