"You're beautiful, you don't need to watch calories."

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  • BuoyantSoul
    BuoyantSoul Posts: 117 Member
    I must be in the minority since no one asks me what I'm doing on my phone. OP you are possibly a statistical anomaly. 3 x's in a week is quite a feat. Best of luck with those strangers lurking over your shoulder.

    Yeah, that's kinda weird. I log on my phone all the time and nobody asks me what I'm doing. They probably assume I'm sending a text or playing a game or checking email or whatever... how would they know I'm looking at porn? I mean, "logging meals"?
  • blue696
    blue696 Posts: 94 Member
    I agree. People say that all the time, but it really is important, and people also don't realize how hard you work for your figure and body.
  • ceajay
    ceajay Posts: 1
    Keep working hard :)
  • fr053n
    fr053n Posts: 2,793 Member
    Some people just don't think about how they look and what they eat until it becomes a problem (e.g. they don't fit into their clothes anymore). Then they decide to go on a diet. I've had people tell me that tracking my calories is obsessive behavior and that they are glad that they don't need to worry about having to do that. They simply lose weight when they gain a couple pounds too much.
  • Hell_Flower
    Hell_Flower Posts: 348 Member
    I know you posted this topic a few days ago, but I had to give it an AMEN!

    Me too! :bigsmile:

    And also, my two cents and to the person who said they called "obsessive" because they count calories. I get the same.

    But ya know what - the vast majority of people are ignorant as to how many calories are actually in food. There's a program in the UK called "Secret Eaters" and people cannot work out how they are putting on 90lbs in a year. Then they track what they actually DO eat and realise - f**k, they ate 700 calories in a day from snacks. Or added 500 calories to a meal by including fries.

    It's sure as hell not obsessive. It's awareness. I think that's what people don't understand. There is a line between the two and it can get pretty fine, but I think if people actually were aware, they wouldn't be so quick to judge.
  • _karyn_
    _karyn_ Posts: 11 Member
    I HATE that. When I've mentioned working out or watching what I eat I always get "You don't need to work out! You're already skinny!" My mood depends on how I respond to this. I was in a really foul mood one day, had a headache and just didn't feel good. Mentioned I'd probably end up doing double to make up for not working out that day and I got the lovely response of "Why do you need to exercise? You're already skinny!" and I snapped at them and said "I do it so I don't end up looking like you." It was rude, I know, but so were they. I hate that while our society is trying to make bigger people feel good about themselves, those of us who work hard to maintain a certain weight and feel good about ourselves inside and out are treated rudely, as if it's okay to tell a thin person she "looks anorexic" or "should eat a burger!" because thin people don't have feelings or anything.
  • fr053n
    fr053n Posts: 2,793 Member
    I have seen that show! It's pretty entertaining! And yes, I think, as long as you are being healthy, it doesn't matter how you do it. If some people need to count their calories to keep their weight on track, they should not be criticised for it. Not everyone is blessed with the ability to "listen to their body" and eat the proper nutrition by eating what their body "needs".
  • emmanap91
    emmanap91 Posts: 300 Member
    OP, that reminds me of earlier this week: I was at Popeye's getting fried chicken with my boyfriend (yes, it fit my daily calories), and the cashier was listing their fountain drinks. When she got to the diet soda, she said, "Diet coke, which you certainly don't need."

    I appreciate the compliment, but how do you think I'm getting/staying thin? It is precisely by watching what I eat and drink!
    (I don't like diet soda, so I didn't have to contradict her anyway)

    I wish we could send a message to the world: "Hey, most people above 18-22 have to actually pay attention to what we eat in order to remain fit! It does NOT come naturally to the majority of the human race!"

    [I used to think it came naturally to most fit people, and that was part of my excuse not to try to get fit - I assumed my body just didn't work that way, I thought I had a naturally soft body-type.]
  • Iwishyouwell
    Iwishyouwell Posts: 1,888 Member
    one more thing...americans in general dont understand what a normal weight even looks like on a person because EVERYONE is overweight. Even the people they think look good are overweight so it becomes the norm.

    The people that are actually the appropriate weight are viewed as crazy Gym fitness nuts who are obsessed.

    I assume you're being hyperbolic on the whole "EVERYONE" front, but otherwise I totally agree.

    We have a very, very distorted view of the human body here in the States, in general. Lots of people who are technically overweight aren't considered so because they don't look so in comparison to the legions of really fat and obese people.

    One of the reasons Americans typically scoff at the suggested weight ranges on the old height/weight charts is because legions of us are totally out of touch with what a "normal", non-overweight body weighed for the average person before the last 2 or 3 decades.

    Unless you're an outlier with a ton of muscle, I think most people losing weight actually have goal weights that will leave the potentially still carrying too much excess fat.
  • lavendah
    lavendah Posts: 126 Member
    People really take this 'self acceptance' bs to a whole another level,and it seems totally non-sensical.
    It only makes sense when someone is killing themselves over something they have no control over/are not responsible for/cannot change.

    True that many people don't need to count calories to maintain their weight,but if someone does feel the need to do so,ain't nothing wrong with that.
  • inky16
    inky16 Posts: 113 Member
    Ok, I didn't read through all 7 pages of this, but I've got to add my 2 cents in...

    When people tell you "You're beautiful, you don't need to watch calories," it's not really about you. It's not degrading, it's not telling you that you should be unhealthy or fat... Having been someone who, in the past, would have said something just like this... I can tell you it comes from two places.

    First, it's a compliment. Genuine, envious, whatever... it's still a compliment and should be answered with a polite (not snarky or sarcastic) "thank you."

    Second, it's coming from a place of pain, a place of self-deprecation, and a place of fear. Like someone else mentioned, you'll notice these comments come from the overweight, or those who see themselves as overweight. They probably come across as condescending and self-righteous, because deep down they feel the exact opposite.

    So however you choose to respond, be kind and encouraging. As my mama said, don't fight fire with fire. Spread a little love. :flowerforyou:
  • misschoppo
    misschoppo Posts: 463 Member
    Love your analogy and I completely agree.

    People tell me I don't need to watch what I eat or exercise so much because I "look great".........no, I look great because I DO those things. If I DIDN'T, I wouldn't look great.

    +1 :smile:

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