The "I have stretchmarks, there's no point..." mentality.

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  • suremeansyes
    suremeansyes Posts: 962 Member
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    Still... Most people see stretch marks as disgusting. Even if I do get slimmer and am a "socially acceptable" size, my scars will always be ugly and judged.

    No, no, no, some people see stretch marks as disgusting ON THEMSELVES. How many times have you looked at someone else and thought "Man, they look disgusting?" Probably not very often, if ever.

    I have surgery scars, I have stretch marks (and I too have not been pregnant, just developed very quickly, so I have them on boobs and hips). Here are a couple pictures of myself, I still wear a bikini and idgaf about the scars across my abdomen and the stretch marks on my boobs and hips. Ignore the huge bruise on my chest, lol, I teach swim lessons and a kid kicked me on accident.

    14126707237_0a4b3699bd.jpg
    14309900911_6cd43962f4_n.jpg
  • F00LofaT00K
    F00LofaT00K Posts: 688 Member
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    I have the same and every so often I notice them, but mostly I just notice how much healthier and beautiful I look. My boyfriend didn't notice them until I pointed them out and I don't think most people pay attention to the little details that we scrutinize on our own bodies. Personally, I'd rather be fit and be able to enjoy rock climbing, swimming, hiking and walking up the steps without being out of breath than be overweight with less noticeable stretch marks. I have made a LOT of progress and the stretch marks are just a reminder of how far I've come. They may never go away entirely, but they will fade over time.
  • Eleonora91
    Eleonora91 Posts: 688 Member
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    Honestly I always had them, some people just have a very thin skin layer. There's no way I can get rid of them, but even though showing my tummy isn't my priority, I can easily wear sleeveless tops or such. Don't be scared of them, most people won't even notice them so much... if they do, and make you notice it, they're probably pricks.
  • wheird
    wheird Posts: 7,963 Member
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    I have some awful stretch marks. I couldn't care less.
  • zyxst
    zyxst Posts: 9,134 Member
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    Finding out I had developed a 6" by 3" tan birthmark on my butt sorta pushed my stretch mark issue to the back burner.

    For me, they're ugly, but the only people who see them are me, my husband, and my GP.
  • _Zardoz_
    _Zardoz_ Posts: 3,987 Member
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    I've got stretch Marks and some loose skin but hey it's better than being Morbidly obese and dying a 10 or 20 years earlier. Most of us will just have minor problems with it and it may go or fade within time. It's like many things in life not a huge amount you can do about it so little point getting hung up on it. Rather than focus on the bad changes focus on the good changes your weightloss has brought you. I have a mass of Scars up my left arm from a Motorbike accident 20 years ago where my arm went through a windscreen and I stupidly was not wearing a jacket. These scars post accident were rather horrific. I had people stare at them so I went through a phase of always wearing long sleeves. then I came to the conclusion it wasn't my problem and I should focus on the fact I still had an arm (as I nearly lost it) and was able to wear short sleeves. Since then I never worry. 20 odd years down the line and the scars have faded and very few people notice them as they have faded so much and I have an arm and can do things.
  • ironanimal
    ironanimal Posts: 5,922 Member
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    "Oh no, stretch marks! How will I ever improve my fitness and health with stretch marks?!"

    Nobody really cares about stretch marks - well, maybe there are exceptions, but then someone so concerned with something so asinine is hardly worth you worrying about.

    I have loads of them. I couldn't tell you where they are or how bad they are off the top of my head though, because they're just not a concern. My girlfriend has them, too, but I honestly don't notice unless she makes a fuss over pointing them out.
  • tycho_mx
    tycho_mx Posts: 426 Member
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    I have some awful stretch marks. I couldn't care less.

    Same here -arms and chest from aggressive weight gaining / bodybuilding in my teens.
  • devil_in_a_blue_dress
    devil_in_a_blue_dress Posts: 5,214 Member
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    You do know that you are complaining about tiny lines on your skin that are just colored slightly different than the rest? Seriously, they are no big deal. They sure as hell aren't "disgusting". I can guarantee that the only person noticing them on you is you.

    Don't be so hard on yourself.

    This.,

    Everyone has them. You don't notice theirs, just like nobody notices yours.
  • meganjcallaghan
    meganjcallaghan Posts: 949 Member
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    stretch marks aren't so bad if you're lucky enough to have skin that doesn't stay loose. Unfortunately I have both. The marks aren't really bothersome, but the fact that they're decorating skin that literally drapes my body sure is.
  • Rachifloon
    Rachifloon Posts: 129 Member
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    No, no, no, some people see stretch marks as disgusting ON THEMSELVES. How many times have you looked at someone else and thought "Man, they look disgusting?" Probably not very often, if ever.

    I think you, and others that mentioned this, have hit the nail on the head here... I look at scars and such on other people, and think "what a cool, interesting pattern", or "THAT must have a story behind it", never that someone looks disgusting or less beautiful but fascination of the human body and slight curiosity (of course, I would never bound up to someone and outrightly ask "duuuude, what happened?!"). I never looked at myself in the positive way I do others who have similar markings. Simply because they're on me, and I don't know why. I think that may have something to do with what Barbie said, the media forbids marks and imperfections as a bad thing and sort of reinforces that "must cover up, can't photoshop real life" thinking in me. Sadly, the media's view on "beauty" has a very persuading effect on me and I hate it...

    I am very glad I mad this topic. My attitude about this has always been internalised and released only as self loathing so knowing that the majority that I thought cared actually doesn't, and that it's a more natural thing than I thought, well, it's made me feel a ton better.
  • sun_fish
    sun_fish Posts: 864 Member
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    Most people see stretch marks as disgusting. Even if I do get slimmer and am a "socially acceptable" size, my scars will always be ugly and judged.

    Nope. Not really. "Most" people see stretch marks as normal as "most" people have them in some form or another including a lot of non-mothers.

    I completely agree with this, I have never heard anyone say they think stretch marks are disgusting. I know I certainly don't think they are ugly and or judge others that have them.
  • bajoyba
    bajoyba Posts: 1,153 Member
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    A good rule of thumb is to treat yourself the way you would treat someone you love.
    Because you should be someone that you love. :smile:
  • Danicacub
    Danicacub Posts: 41 Member
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    We all have them, I have had many of mine since I was 12! Never been pregnant either, got them on thighs, arms, hips, stomach, calves, boobs, back. My friend always commented that she didn't have ANY, and of course she was curvy and gorgeous.. pretty insufferable.

    If it offends someone that you have stretch marks then they don't have to look.. but honestly do you care what THOSE people think? shallow, stupid people? and I bet you that they have them too.

    I have had a big issue with mine for the longest time, especially my inner thighs, I always feel self-conscious wearing shorts... but I still do, I would hate to look back on my life and feel I didn't live because of some marks. Like when I get wrinkles I will probably kick myself for worrying about stretch marks.

    Also helps to find someone who doesn't care about stretch marks, If you are with a guy who makes you feel bad about them or comments on them.. not worth it. My husband doesn't care even though I know that whenever I do have a baby I will look like a zebra. :laugh:

    Overall , no, It NEVER stops me from losing weight, Never ever give up. In all honesty, before, people would say "she has stretch marks because shes fat".. now, after nearly 50lbs loss, people say "she has stretch marks, how? shes not fat"..

    Keep going :flowerforyou:
  • sugarlemonpie
    sugarlemonpie Posts: 311 Member
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    Honestly, the stretchmarks have never really bothered me in regards to weight loss. I have a good amount I want to lose, but I figured once I lose it and tone up, they'd probably be less noticeable to me than they are now.

    Just remember, this isn't only about weight loss. This is about health, too.
  • Yanicka1
    Yanicka1 Posts: 4,564 Member
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    News flash, even fitness competitors have them

    14126992610_b52e29c1ca.jpg
    image by yanickahachez, on Flickr
  • QueenBishOTUniverse
    QueenBishOTUniverse Posts: 14,121 Member
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    OP, I'm going to just parrot what everyone else is saying, I never even notice stretch marks on people so I'm quite certain I wouldn't notice them on you. You've worked hard so show it off. I saw on another thread someone mention the idea of wearing a bikini around the house for a while to get used to yourself in it and build confidence, maybe try something like this? The key to looking good really isn't so much about your body, but having confidence in yourself, and please believe me when I say that this is a lesson I'm still trying to knock in to my own head so I realize it takes time, but hey, practice practice practice.
    I'm not so sure you can blame the modern world for these unrealistic images. A thousand year ago Chinese women had their feet bound to portray an unrealistic image of beauty. 100 years ago women were strapped into dresses made of whale bone until they could hardly breath to portray an unrealistic image of beauty.

    Now to derail and nerd out for a moment. The structural support in corsets etc. may be referred to as boning, but it was not actually constructed from the bone material of whales which would be far to inflexible. Corset boning was actually made from the baleen of the whales which is similar in structure to hair and fingernails and gives structural support while allowing for a certain amount of movement and flexibility. Sorry, I teach aquatic science, can't help myself! :drinker:
  • DanaDark
    DanaDark Posts: 2,187 Member
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    I've seen skinny people that have been skinny all their lives have them.

    I am a 5'4" male, my largest weights was 141 pounds, and I have some (inner thigh).

    So, pretty much anyone can get them.

    While not perfect, they are far from horrifying. In most cases, they look just fine on people.
  • thingofstuff
    thingofstuff Posts: 93 Member
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    Also Bio Oil and other knock off super skin healing oils or Polysporin do wonders on scars and stretch marks. I had a really unfortunate 4 inch scar starting from the middle of my bum cheek to down my thigh (from an awkward to explain accident) and it is almost unnoticeable now from regular exfoliating and keeping moisturized. I have stretch marks on my inner thighs and outer hips and they are are almost invisible after applying moisturizer.

    All in all what everyone before me has said is true, the people that should matter will not care about stretch marks. Don't blame your body dissatisfaction on the marks, take control of the things you can do every day like exfoliating, applying healing oils before bed, and hydrating your skin every morning and, of course, focus on getting into the shape you want to be in. Then if you are still unhappy with the stretch marks take more expensive/drastic action.

    Trust me, I am young, have always been physically active, just shy of 5 foot 8 inches, have never been more than 160 pounds at my heaviest in the middle of puberty and I still have stretch marks. I am a model for an international agency and no one screams in horror at the stretch marks on my thighs when we run around in our underwear at fittings.
  • MissFlab2Fab2014
    MissFlab2Fab2014 Posts: 109
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    This was and still is a issue I fight with everyday! Before having my son I had awesome skin, like beautiful sun kissed gorgeous skin. I had him and BAM stretch marks on my stomach, near my belly button, hips, thighs, butt, breasts even in my arm pits, oh best one that I hate!!! back of my knees....:grumble: but as I lost a little weight, and with time (and I swear by bio-oil) which I dont use anymore cause its like 14$ every time... but, with a little tanning too. I don't notice them as much. Like either I am use to it or it just isn't as noticable. You just have to accept them, embrace them, and TAN them :wink:

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