I'm ready to give up

First off, it's time to stop thinking about "dieting." Anything you do should be sustainable over the long haul.

I was very much in your boat... Crash dieting and eating 1200-1400 a day and thinking I would never get to enjoy food again. Eventually I came to realize that my journey was a marathon, not a sprint. I could rock a 10,000 calorie deficit each week, lose 3 pounds, and feel terrible and miserable, or I could shoot for a 3500 deficit, have some treats, and feel better while losing 1 pound.

Don't weigh yourself after a treat or popcorn! You know that's just sodium and water weight.

Be vigilant and honest while tracking your food... Avoid the calorie creep. It's easy to leave out 15 calories here and 20 there, and not realize where you are.

It's so friggin tough. As a food addict, my primary purpose of eating food used to be the enjoyment. As such, it was impossible to moderate and control portions. Changing to a mindset of food being fuel took months. And I still struggle every day. Just commit to a larger timeframe. Look at calories on a weekly basis instead of daily. That will allow you some more flexibility. Decide which treats are really worth the calories. I love donuts... Love em. But the 5 seconds of enjoyment aren't worth the calories in my budget more than maybe once a month now. But I've learned to replace that enjoyment with other things... Whether it's healthy foods, activity, playing with my kids.

I empathize. But it can be done. I went from 4000-5000 calories a day not even realizing how much I was eating, to struggling to hit 2000 calories while eating almost as much as I want. Share your diary with others and see what they are eating.

How tall are you? You might be at an ok weight for now and just need to work on body composition now instead of a number on the scale.
If you DO have fat you still need to lose, try changing up your diet.
Increase protein and lower carbs a bit. Many of us ladies find we need fewer carbs as we age and our hormones change.

Or zig zag your calorie levels. Look into 5:2 fasting where you create your deficit for the week by eating 500 for 2 nonconsecutive days, then eat at maintenance the rest of the week. This can give you more flexibility in your diet.

Hang in there!

It is not popular with some people on here but I stopped dieting after losing no weight for the last 20 years no matter what I did. Talk about frustrating! I also was diagnosed with type 2 diabetes and possible hypothyroid. So, after trying to eat lots of whole grains, lean meats, lots of veggies and fruits all of 2013 despite small servings, feeling deprived and with roller coaster blood sugar readings I was rewarded with my highest blood glucose ever in 12 years and a new prescription for Victoza which can cause pancreatic cancer. That did it. I was angry at the medical establishment for throwing another drug my way so it galvanized me to start researching. I KNEW that there had to be something out there somewhere that would work for me. I mean, I couldn't be the only one that had this problem and I knew it. So I started Googling ways to lower my glucose. Lower glucose meant lower weight; I knew that much. Diabetes is extremely strong in my Dad's side of the family so this was going to benefit others including my own children if I found a solution.

My research led me first to Dr. Bernstein's Diabetes Solution which no physician ever mentioned to me (grrrr) and I read it. He is a type 1 since age 12 and is nearly 80 now. He advocated carbohydrate restriction so I decided that no kind of bread or grain product (pizza to cookies) was worth an amputation, heart attack or death. I started to drop my carb consumption and tested every food's effects on my blood sugar per his protocols. That last bit is what really showed me for the first time what my particular food culprits were. If something spiked my sugar I kicked it out the door. In my case I found that I am extremely carbohydrate sensitive and any type of grain (including oats) spiked me. Most dairy spiked me, fruits spiked me and starchy veggies like potatoes, sweet potatoes, winter squash, corn or root veggies to some extent. I found that what I had been told by the establishment, that is to eat whole grains and low fat, was competently wrong for my body and I had the lab results to prove that it was leading me down the path of serious complications all while being "cared" for by my doctors. I had to be responsible for my own health and I got angrier which further motivated me. The doctors were just overpaid drug pushers who had no interest in curing me; they only treated my symptoms and wanted me on a drug merry-go-round. No way.

I followed Dr. Bernstein's book for 2 months before my next doctor visit. My HbA1C dropped from 7.9 to 6.5 in that short time and I had lost 17 lbs without changing anything else at that time. I continued to test, log my foods and research because now my interest was piqued. For once in my life I finally started to understand the "why" of things that messed with my body and understanding that made all of the difference. I was no longer in the dark and floundering around. I bought Wheat Belly, Grain Brain, and several more books. I researched heavily. I learned a lot. I am still doing that at almost 6 months into this journey.

Today I am now one month into an experiment with low carb/high fat to see what that would do. I found that my body needs this, and experimenting with a low carb/high fat protocol has yielded amazing things already. I have lost only 3 more pounds so far but I have been very sedentary lately and I am still experimenting with foods which is slow and can have negative effects but in the end I will have my knowledge of what is good and what is not. Now, don't get the wrong idea; I eat a huge variety of wonderful whole foods. I am also off of all diabetic medications with nearly normal blood sugar readings. I cannot begin to describe how much energy I have now, I am always in a happy mood, I never go too low on blood sugar and I only spike when a new food test is unsuccessful. If that happens, it is out of my diet. I crave no carbs whatsoever. I no longer eat sugar of any kind and I honestly don't care. That is astounding because I had a major sweet tooth before but I know now that I was addicted to them thanks to food enhancers by big food taking unfair advantage of my body chemistry. I don't recall giving anyone permission to use me as a human guinea pig. I have learned to substitute for most anything quite well and I feel no hunger between meals whatsoever, I sleep well for the first time in a decade, I was a horrible night owl and now wake naturally with the sunrise (that in itself is a mini miracle), I no longer have IBS or GERD issues, I used to regurgitate food when burping- no more. My dry skin is gone, no more dark circles or bags under my eyes. I have to make sure that I eat enough calories because this protocol over time diminishes hunger because you no longer are on a carb roller coaster with eating then hunger then repeating. I eat very low carbs (only vegetables to get nutrients that I want), moderate protein of any type and high healthy fats (coconut oil, olive oil, grass fed butter). I am sustained all day and satisfied. Purely satisfied. My lipids are better and my doctor said to keep on doing whatever it is that I am doing because he was impressed. Wait until he sees me in September!

I will tell you that you MUST research and learn so that you do it correctly if this interests you. It is not a fad diet, it is a lifestyle choice that some of us must do regardless but many do willingly. Those who say it is unhealthy or a fad are not educating themselves before they speak. Once you see the research you will see why this is a healthy genetic choice for most people.

Sweden officially made low carb/high fat their national dietary protocol late last year after reviewing over 16,000 studies on low carb/high fat protocols. If you read some of the books outlining the history of how we were all told to eat low fat/high complex carbs (politicians and journalists decided that one for us, not doctors) you will see that big food is even more evil than big tobacco because everyone eats. Gary Taubes' Good Calories, Bad Calories is a good starting point.

I also buy only organic produce now because there is a proven correlation between pesticide and herbicide use and diabetes, PCOS and metabolic syndrome. Commercial dairy has also been positively correlated with causing type 1 diabetes in children.I won't go into the details of why here but it is heinous at best. I am still switching over to 100% grass fed or free range meats and I buy only wild caught Pacific seafood. No Atlantic and no farm raised or imported from China. That is nasty stuff.

There is a learning curve but you have your whole life to make either good or bad choices for your own personal self. You are obviously interested but discouraged and I know that I was in your shoes 6 months ago. If what you are doing isn't working and you are miserable then you need to review why and change your protocols. Don't mindlessly trust the "experts" because even the ADA and AHA say low fat/high carb to this day despite the fact that they also tested low carb/high fat and endorsed that it worked! What is up with that??

I say that researching our food supply is like choosing the blue or red pill in the Matrix and my eyes were opened wide. My husband wanted to lose weight and bring his blood pressure down so he started with the low fat/high carb and cut calories despite what I was doing being the opposite. He lost only 11 lbs, was grouchy, completely miserable and always hungry. That was 3 months ago. Our kids complained and he just couldn't ignore my success with my weight, energy and blood glucose readings and decided to finally "cave" and try low carb/high fat 2 1/2 weeks ago. He has already lost another 16 lbs and 2 pant sizes with zero exercise so far. He says now that his biggest hurdle was the brainwashing of the old message. He is seeing his energy ramp up, is never hungry, is really enjoying his choices and is starting to see his blood pressure come down. He now hopes to get off of that medication and he is quite frankly, amazed.

You do not need carbohydrates to live or be healthy but you do need quality protein and healthy fat. They are essential to life. Saturated fat has been definitively proven to not be our enemy but big food actively tries to discredit the research because eating whole foods makes them no money. They cannot patent a food unless they make it GMO (and they do!). My lab results prove to me that I am doing a very good thing for my body and I will never be duped by big food or big pharma again. I see my father on a cocktail of over 25 drugs daily to manage his diabetes, neuropathy, depression, cardiovascular system, restless legs, arthritis, lumbar pain, and more. He is now showing signs of early dementia, too. What I have learned is that EVERY one of those conditions can be reduced or eliminated with the elimination of grains and excessive carb consumption but he is nearly 86 and set in his ways. He is getting more interested however so time will tell. I do NOT want to find myself in his shoes in 35 years from now. My brother, also a type 2, is going to give this a try and see if he can get control without drugs, too. I know other people who are not diabetic who have dropped grains (whether out of gluten sensitivity or just curiosity) and the pounds fall off. Dr. William Davis the cardiologist who wrote Wheat Belly says that his patients lose an average of 26 lbs just by eliminating grains from their diet and doing nothing else which tells you a lot right there. If nothing else, take away that eating those things is truly a mental addiction as well as physical. You will not die by eliminating them but you just might if you don't. I now consider myself well and truly free for the first time in my life and I am 51 looking forward to a full life. I went from feeling old and worn out to reversing the clock 30 years. I am energetic and happy. Best wishes!

I so feel you. Over a year ago, I found Zumba and deep water aerobics, developing a love for both. I went to Zumba 5x/week and Deep water aerobics at least once a week, but usually more. So in other words, I was exercising a LOT and at high-intensity. I was eating 1400 calories a day. In 6 months, I lost about 3 pounds. I could tell that I was in better shape, but I was still about 80 lbs overweight! Then I got pregnant, and thought that I would just continue with the Zumba and aerobics classes. To my surprise, I was sicker than a dog with that pregnancy (hadn't been with the previous 5) and pretty much spent the whole 9 months in bed. I didn't gain much weight (less than 10 lbs) due to tossing my cookies all the time, but I had severe sugar cravings when I could eat. Then when I gave birth, eating was SO FUN because I could do it without throwing up! YIPEE! So I gained the weight I should have gained while pregnant after he was born.

I got serious and set my calorie goal to 1200 and did okay sticking to that. I didn't exercise or change my eating habits. I lost 20-23 lbs and stopped for months. Didn't gain back, but couldn't seem to lose more to save my life.

I started having some weird health issues, and long story longer, I was told I was prediabetic by my doctor. Her advice? Give up sugar. Don't eat refined carbs. Watch carbs in general. Etc. I recommitted to 1200 calories a day and gave up sugar, refined carbs and started eating lots LOTS more veggies (sugar snap peas are my crack) and lean meats. Weight loss kicked back in!

I know it's controversial, but read and read again what LCHFftW99 posted here. GOOD STUFF! What works for YOU? Do some research and find out what works that you can live with!

I do feel for you on the whole "So WHAT? Do I NEVER get to enjoy food again??" thing! I had to work pretty hard on my attitude about that. The weight loss picking back up has helped. I keep telling myself that nothing tastes as good as being thin feels. Much of that time, I believe it. Mostly. Ahem.

I sure wish you the best. It's not easy, it's often frustrating, and I'm just hoping that in the end I'll be hot enough that it will be worth it. Friend me if you want. Best of luck!!

I think you should eat back your calories. You said you don't, but then say you cheat sometimes, so im not sure what what that looks like on paper.
I eat all my calories back and it keeps me from being crazy hungry. If I eat back calories im FINE.
I think of calories as a type of money. like $. can't always get what you want. some things I can't afford. its sad but oh well. I don't have unlimited money and unlimited calorie limit. It's not fair but lifes not fair.
I eat what ever I want. But calories are like buying things, you can save up and get something really great but you cant have everything. If I binge at lunch I accept the fact im done for the day. Same as if I buy something from the store that leaves me broke.
It's true that it can be a drag recording your calories but its budgeting, just like with finances. Back when people wrote cheques, I would balance my chequebook as I wrote them out. If I don't keep track of my finances I get into trouble. Same with calories.
Thats my philosophy I hope it helps you in some way.
p.s.edit
restricting my food has improved my life I now enjoy what I get more than ever. I used to eat an entire pizza and think nothing of it. blah. Now I will look forward to 1 slice all day and its like a party when I get it. I enjoy food more than ever now.

PS I am 4'11" and 52 years old. Calories are set to 1450 a day, but I average 1550. Losing= still possible when teeny and older.

I've been there, we all have. You probably should know that only about 15% of people who attempt to lose weight will reach their goal weight (based on my keeping records of hundreds of weight loss bloggers), so it's a hard road that we all are walking.

You are bound to get lots of good advice on this question, as well as some conflicting advice.

All I can say is, when you feel like giving up, stop trying to lose weight. Hold it there for a while. The desire to lose weight waxes and wanes. Take a break if necessary.

But if you're having a break, try try and try some more to not gain. There is no point in losing the same pound or kilogram 10, 20 or 100 times.