Can you relate to this?
Replies
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I am glad to see so many speak out about not relating to this comic strip. I was overweight (by 100 pounds) for the last 25 years, I taught 5 year olds with no social filters, walked and ran at a local public track & went out in public all the time. Never once has anyone said or yelled anything like this to me.
I wonder if it's more about the way a person carries themselves or the attitude they project. People are bullied every day - not just overweight people.
ETA: I am in no way suggesting that the way a person carries themselves or the attitude they have gives anyone license to bully them.
I think you (and I at 225) weren't big enough to get it, assuming I'm understanding what the writer of the story is saying.
I wouldn't be so sure about it being a weight minimum or maximum. I have friends who have been screamed at from passing cars when they were exercising at just 15-20 lb overweight. I weighed 307 at my heaviest, as a 5'8" female, and didn't get comments of this level.
I also don't believe that the way a person carries themselves or the attitude they have is always a "protective barrier" against such bullying. But I think in some cases it is. I believe that to have been the case for me, anyway.0 -
I've only experienced tiny bits of this in a foreign country. Never in the USA. And never from the opposite sex.0
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Yep. Because there are some men out there who think that a woman exists to be a set of attractive body parts. And that we're somehow not doing our jobs if we're not aesthetically pleasing to the eye. And they feel it's their job to call us on this, sometimes using the "health" card, when in reality, we all know what the real reason is.0
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I am glad to see so many speak out about not relating to this comic strip. I was overweight (by 100 pounds) for the last 25 years, I taught 5 year olds with no social filters, walked and ran at a local public track & went out in public all the time. Never once has anyone said or yelled anything like this to me.
I wonder if it's more about the way a person carries themselves or the attitude they project. People are bullied every day - not just overweight people.
ETA: I am in no way suggesting that the way a person carries themselves or the attitude they have gives anyone license to bully them.
I think you (and I at 225) weren't big enough to get it, assuming I'm understanding what the writer of the story is saying.
I wouldn't be so sure about it being a weight minimum or maximum. I have friends who have been screamed at from passing cars when they were exercising at just 15-20 lb overweight. I weighed 307 at my heaviest, as a 5'8" female, and didn't get comments of this level.
I also don't believe that the way a person carries themselves or the attitude they have is always a "protective barrier" against such bullying. But I think in some cases it is. I believe that to have been the case for me, anyway.
I agree. I think bullying in general can target what people perceive or know to be your weakness. Maybe my attitude was a protective barrier as well.0 -
The bit about shouted comments, yeah. And I once had a group of young men come up to me and say something very aggresive and sexually graphic to me whilst walking through town with my then 2 year old.
Still, even when I was thin I still had comedy sized breasts and men thought it was ok to lean out of their window and scream things at me, even when I was 14 and in my school uniform (and clearly 14 and with my school chums, not a stripper...)
Come to think of it, I sometimes despise men.0 -
Ironically I've only heard comments like that from my father of all people. Telling me I look like a "dough girl", asking me if I will fit in a booth at dinner, fatty, top heavy, and I could go on. And he wonders why I lack in the confidence category.
And then my ex-husband always threatened to leave me if I ever got fat. I'm glad we were already divorced before my weight ever became an issue.
It really makes me sad that the people who you should be able to trust the most are the ones who hurt you the most. I never heard comments like that from strangers though.0 -
The bit about shouted comments, yeah. And I once had a group of young men come up to me and say something very aggresive and sexually graphic to me whilst walking through town with my then 2 year old.
Still, even when I was thin I still had comedy sized breasts and men thought it was ok to lean out of their window and scream things at me, even when I was 14 and in my school uniform (and clearly 14 and with my school chums, not a stripper...)
Come to think of it, I sometimes despise men.
Some men are despicable.0 -
so are some women.The bit about shouted comments, yeah. And I once had a group of young men come up to me and say something very aggresive and sexually graphic to me whilst walking through town with my then 2 year old.
Still, even when I was thin I still had comedy sized breasts and men thought it was ok to lean out of their window and scream things at me, even when I was 14 and in my school uniform (and clearly 14 and with my school chums, not a stripper...)
Come to think of it, I sometimes despise men.
Some men are despicable.0 -
The bit about shouted comments, yeah. And I once had a group of young men come up to me and say something very aggresive and sexually graphic to me whilst walking through town with my then 2 year old.
Still, even when I was thin I still had comedy sized breasts and men thought it was ok to lean out of their window and scream things at me, even when I was 14 and in my school uniform (and clearly 14 and with my school chums, not a stripper...)
Come to think of it, I sometimes despise men.
Some men are despicable.
So are some women. Its not just one sex that uses harsh judgemental words.
I have heard woman say about a friend I have that "he's too short to date", what is the difference? All comments like these are cruel.0 -
so are some women.The bit about shouted comments, yeah. And I once had a group of young men come up to me and say something very aggresive and sexually graphic to me whilst walking through town with my then 2 year old.
Still, even when I was thin I still had comedy sized breasts and men thought it was ok to lean out of their window and scream things at me, even when I was 14 and in my school uniform (and clearly 14 and with my school chums, not a stripper...)
Come to think of it, I sometimes despise men.
Some men are despicable.
Yep, I can think of a few. But on this topic specifically, no woman has ever thought she should, nay, had the right, to verbally abuse me in the street or shout sexually graphic things in front of a toddler.0 -
The bit about shouted comments, yeah. And I once had a group of young men come up to me and say something very aggresive and sexually graphic to me whilst walking through town with my then 2 year old.
Still, even when I was thin I still had comedy sized breasts and men thought it was ok to lean out of their window and scream things at me, even when I was 14 and in my school uniform (and clearly 14 and with my school chums, not a stripper...)
Come to think of it, I sometimes despise men.
Some men are despicable.
So are some women. Its not just one sex that uses harsh judgemental words.
I have heard woman say about a friend I have that "he's too short to date", what is the difference? All comments like these are cruel.
Touche but what the difference is that people find it ok to say I don't like that girl because she is a foot taller than me over I don't like that girl because she is overweight.0 -
so are some women.The bit about shouted comments, yeah. And I once had a group of young men come up to me and say something very aggresive and sexually graphic to me whilst walking through town with my then 2 year old.
Still, even when I was thin I still had comedy sized breasts and men thought it was ok to lean out of their window and scream things at me, even when I was 14 and in my school uniform (and clearly 14 and with my school chums, not a stripper...)
Come to think of it, I sometimes despise men.
Some men are despicable.
Yep, I can think of a few. But on this topic specifically, no woman has ever thought she should, nay, had the right, to verbally abuse me in the street or shout sexually graphic things in front of a toddler.
I'm certain that fat men are subject to an equivalent amount of abuse for their obesity as are women. With respect to sexual explicit ... ness, some people are *kitten*. I mean, that's just a fact. It would be silly to hate all clowns because one sprayed you in the groin with seltzer water at your own birthday party and then all of your friends laughed and you were called "pee-pants" for the rest of elementary school. DAMN YOU CHUCKLES THE CLOWN! DAMN YOU TO HELL!0 -
In my younger years these kinds of comments drove me to the edge of anorexia causing my excessive weight loss struggle to turn into a life time thyroid disorder. I realized being thin--that these people are still jerks even when you are an acceptable weight they just get to you more when you are overweight.
I remember in my second round of weight loss after losing my thyroid function actually being laughed at by two guys at the gym. I interrupted them and said, "and where do you think a fat woman belongs besides in your gym giving you an opportunity to laugh? Shall I go back on my couch and get a bag of potato chips? Should I run off to fat lady island?" They looked at me and were sort of in shock to be caught and several month later when I did lose some weight one actually came up and apologized.
Most people don't apologize, they are absolutely ignorant. The friends I have kept in life have loved me everywhere from 120 to 250 and everywhere in between.
Perhaps you can respond in future in your head, I have the power to lose weight but there is nothing you can ever do to gain intelligence and I would rather be fat than stupid any day.0 -
so are some women.The bit about shouted comments, yeah. And I once had a group of young men come up to me and say something very aggresive and sexually graphic to me whilst walking through town with my then 2 year old.
Still, even when I was thin I still had comedy sized breasts and men thought it was ok to lean out of their window and scream things at me, even when I was 14 and in my school uniform (and clearly 14 and with my school chums, not a stripper...)
Come to think of it, I sometimes despise men.
Some men are despicable.
Yep, I can think of a few. But on this topic specifically, no woman has ever thought she should, nay, had the right, to verbally abuse me in the street or shout sexually graphic things in front of a toddler.
I'm certain that fat men are subject to an equivalent amount of abuse for their obesity as are women. With respect to sexual explicit ... ness, some people are *kitten*. I mean, that's just a fact. It would be silly to hate all clowns because one sprayed you in the groin with seltzer water at your own birthday party and then all of your friends laughed and you were called "pee-pants" for the rest of elementary school. DAMN YOU CHUCKLES THE CLOWN! DAMN YOU TO HELL!
:laugh:
I don't hate men; I'm married to one, have male friends and a lovely son. The incidents just confirmed and reinforced certain things. However, I didn't think of the kind of comments fat men have to put up with.
I didn't mean to digress from the OP's point with a tirade about men. Everyone has the ability to act like a tosspot.0 -
I can only relate to the first panel, incidentally. If I say I'm fat the number one thing I hear is "You aren't fat!" Yes. Yes I am. I just carry weight really well. *eyetwitch*0
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I can relate to this. When I was younger I was called fat a lot. It can make you think you are not good enough if you aren't a certain size. I know better now but there are still a lot of cruel people out there that get their kicks by calling people names. I know they are just insecure about themselves and somehow it makes them feel better to knock someone else down.0
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:laugh:
I don't hate men; I'm married to one, have male friends and a lovely son. The incidents just confirmed and reinforced certain things. However, I didn't think of the kind of comments fat men have to put up with.
I didn't mean to digress from the OP's point with a tirade about men. Everyone has the ability to act like a tosspot.
I saw your 'sometimes I despise men' and got defensive. I really do believe in the potential for everyone to . . . yeah, I don't know what a tosspot is but it invokes imagery of chamber pots and --
wait, are you making fun of me about the chuckles the clown incident??! IT WASN'T PEE IT WAS SELTZER!!
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:laugh:
I don't hate men; I'm married to one, have male friends and a lovely son. The incidents just confirmed and reinforced certain things. However, I didn't think of the kind of comments fat men have to put up with.
I didn't mean to digress from the OP's point with a tirade about men. Everyone has the ability to act like a tosspot.
I saw your 'sometimes I despise men' and got defensive. I really do believe in the potential for everyone to . . . yeah, I don't know what a tosspot is but it invokes imagery of chamber pots and --
wait, are you making fun of me about the chuckles the clown incident??! IT WASN'T PEE IT WAS SELTZER!!
Ah, tosspot is not a word you would hear a vulcan use...0 -
I was even made fun of at the gym , I didn't say anything to the few kids that were involved with the comments , I just looked their way to make sure they knew I heard them and then they walked away. Its just ridiculous , even though I am not that heavy anymore that these people have no consideration but to try and get under your skin for something that isn't their issue.
anyhow just wanted to vent a little..0 -
I absolutely dislike people who do that. I don't get why they think they have the right to do it.0
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its not like its easily forgotten .. I guess it makes them feel better about themselves in some profound way0
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While I'm sure it does happen, I doubt it's nearly as frequent as people here are trying to make it sound. I suspect a great deal of this is perceived in the same way as the "everyone in the gym is judging me the whole time I'm there" people. I guess it makes them feel better to think the whole world is constantly thinking about them and so they imagine everything people say to them (such as a sales pitch) to be a personal attack intended to hurt their feelings.I am glad to see so many speak out about not relating to this comic strip. I was overweight (by 100 pounds) for the last 25 years, I taught 5 year olds with no social filters, walked and ran at a local public track & went out in public all the time. Never once has anyone said or yelled anything like this to me.
I wonder if it's more about the way a person carries themselves or the attitude they project. People are bullied every day - not just overweight people.
ETA: I am in no way suggesting that the way a person carries themselves or the attitude they have gives anyone license to bully them.0 -
That's a great reason to hate several billion people.The bit about shouted comments, yeah. And I once had a group of young men come up to me and say something very aggresive and sexually graphic to me whilst walking through town with my then 2 year old.
Still, even when I was thin I still had comedy sized breasts and men thought it was ok to lean out of their window and scream things at me, even when I was 14 and in my school uniform (and clearly 14 and with my school chums, not a stripper...)
Come to think of it, I sometimes despise men.0 -
That's a great reason to hate several billion people.The bit about shouted comments, yeah. And I once had a group of young men come up to me and say something very aggresive and sexually graphic to me whilst walking through town with my then 2 year old.
Still, even when I was thin I still had comedy sized breasts and men thought it was ok to lean out of their window and scream things at me, even when I was 14 and in my school uniform (and clearly 14 and with my school chums, not a stripper...)
Come to think of it, I sometimes despise men.
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Nope. I've never seen or heard anything like this. Where do you people live that this happens?
Ditto, and I was 100lbs overweight from high school to my 30s.0 -
Nope. I've never seen or heard anything like this. Where do you people live that this happens?
This is kind of what I was thinking too. Even when I was 150 lb overweight, I never got anything like this.
I recall maybe 5-6 comments being made about my weight in middle school & junior high, and 2 times that rude things were said about it behind my back and I found out.
I am grateful that I can't relate to this.
Lucky for you on not being bullied. It happens everywhere BTW. I remember telling my dad in middle school and his words of wisdom were stand up this them. If you get suspended we both will explain to mom why.
I LOVE your dad. My mom told me to ignore then. You can guess how well that turned out.0 -
Keep in mind, its not exactly that people get told ALL this stuff.. or some of it .. but just once can break your spirit and it stays with you for an eternity. that's what people relate to it. and sometimes people think you don't hear it cause people joke quietly about it.0
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Keep in mind, its not exactly that people get told ALL this stuff.. or some of it .. but just once can break your spirit and it stays with you for an eternity. that's what people relate to it. and sometimes people think you don't hear it cause people joke quietly about it.
This may just be me, but I would never let something that a stranger on the street (or anyone for that matter) said in ignorance "break my spirit" nor would I "dwell on it for eternity". This world is never easy and it's rarely fair. I am a good person, I have contributed a lot in my life to others, I had a successful career. I am loved by family & friends. Our worth is made up of many things - they outweigh words that might be spoken in ignorance. Just my thoughts.0 -
Keep in mind, its not exactly that people get told ALL this stuff.. or some of it .. but just once can break your spirit and it stays with you for an eternity. that's what people relate to it. and sometimes people think you don't hear it cause people joke quietly about it.
Why would you place your sense of self worth in the hands of random strangers?0
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