The Myth of What Women Want

ascrit
ascrit Posts: 770 Member
in Chit-Chat
http://www.doctornerdlove.com/2014/07/what-women-want

I thought this was a tremendous article and full of great insight into how silly it is to try and say all women are one way (women be shoppin yo!) in the same way it would be silly to try and say all men are alike. But here was the money quote:
Now here’s the twist: the same system that women are trying to fix hurts men too. It’s not women who enforce the rigid, toxic definitions of masculinity, it’s men. The same system that tells women they’re horrible sluts for having sex is the same system that makes it harder for men to get help when they’ve been sexually assaulted or when they’re trapped in an abusive relationship. It’s the same system that says manhood is something that can be taken away from you and that any man who doesn’t adhere to the narrow definition of “man” needs to be punished for it. It’s the one that says violence is the only acceptable way to solve your problems and that admitting weakness or seeking help makes you less than a man.
I'm sure some internet tough guys will get all bent out of shape and say that their "men's rights" are being assaulted but for the rest of us it is nice to see that people are thinking and writing about these topics.
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Replies

  • jnichel
    jnichel Posts: 4,553 Member
    It is no myth that women want to make us sammiches.
  • odusgolp
    odusgolp Posts: 10,477 Member
    It is no myth that women want to make us sammiches.

    Myth. I want to make men stir fry or lasagna.
  • usmcmp
    usmcmp Posts: 21,219 Member
    It is no myth that women want to make us sammiches.

    When I'm done with you, you will be making me sammiches.
  • jnichel
    jnichel Posts: 4,553 Member
    It is no myth that women want to make us sammiches.

    Myth. I want to make men stir fry or lasagna.

    You sure know how to set yourself apart from the crowd. :flowerforyou: :bigsmile:
  • jnichel
    jnichel Posts: 4,553 Member
    It is no myth that women want to make us sammiches.

    When I'm done with you, you will be making me sammiches.

    Imma change my profile pic just for you. :laugh:
  • ELMunque
    ELMunque Posts: 136 Member
    Men should be manly, fit and have the ability to save a damsel in distress at any moment in time.

    I have to go now because my bare feet are swollen from preganancy and I'm trying to get the cooking done.
  • Go_Mizzou99
    Go_Mizzou99 Posts: 2,628 Member
    It is no myth that women want to make us sammiches.

    When I'm done with you, you will be making me sammiches.

    Make that a bacon sammich please
  • Kitten2629
    Kitten2629 Posts: 1,358 Member
    Myth.. Women do not want the perfect man.

    We want to be able to eat without our butt's getting bigger :D
  • jkwolly
    jkwolly Posts: 3,049 Member
    It is no myth that women want to make us sammiches.

    Myth. I want to make men stir fry or lasagna.
    I'm not a man, but I'll take this any day :love:

    EDIT: spelling
  • maab_connor
    maab_connor Posts: 3,927 Member
    gender binary pisses me off. i'm glad to see that some ppl are writing from a more enlightened place. and i DO agree that society can be just as hard on men for not fitting an outdated stereotype as it can on women.
  • rjmudlax13
    rjmudlax13 Posts: 900 Member
    Now here’s the twist: the same system that women are trying to fix hurts men too. It’s not women who enforce the rigid, toxic definitions of masculinity, it’s men.

    The article is blocked at work so will have to read later.

    However, I do not necessarily agree with the quoted statement. I know plenty of women who enforce a rigid definition of masculinity.
  • mccindy72
    mccindy72 Posts: 7,001 Member
    It is no myth that women want to make us sammiches.

    Myth. I want to make sex not sammiches. Make your own damn sammich.
  • AmyP619
    AmyP619 Posts: 1,137 Member
    I love this, and I love you for finding / posting!! :D
  • Unknown
    Unknown
    This content has been removed.
  • jnichel
    jnichel Posts: 4,553 Member
    It is no myth that women want to make us sammiches.

    Myth. I want to make sex not sammiches. Make your own damn sammich.

    I think an arrangement can be reached here. Would you like lettuce and tomato on your sammich? :wink: :bigsmile:
  • MysteriousMerlin
    MysteriousMerlin Posts: 2,270 Member
    I'm sure some internet tough guys will get all bent out of shape and say that their "men's rights" are being assaulted but for the rest of us it is nice to see that people are thinking and writing about these topics.

    Amen, brother!
  • SunofaBeach14
    SunofaBeach14 Posts: 4,899 Member
    Any individual is going to inevitably share traits with other individuals of similar race, background, gender, nationality, etc., and I think recognizing some similarity is okay, so long as we do not act disrespectfully, either intentionally or carelessly. I also very much appreciate the author's criticism of the forced antagonism between men and women. It's fun when joking but quite annoying when the real thing rears its head. I'll have to finish the article later today.
  • Timshel_
    Timshel_ Posts: 22,834 Member
    Of course part of what maintains this “conflict” is how much of it relies on the shared wisdom of “everybody knows”. Of course “everybody knows” women don’t want sex. “Everybody knows” women only want slab-jawed alpha-male dudebros with six-packs and seven figure bank accounts. “Everybody knows” women are never going to tell you what they really like in a man.

    This book is about 10 years past in those assumptions generally. The dichotomy that the article is trying to break down is judgmentally being enforced by saying that we haven't changed, imho.
  • phinphanbill26
    phinphanbill26 Posts: 574 Member
    I would gladly make a sammich for the ladies on my FL.

    *patiently waits for the requests*
  • spade117
    spade117 Posts: 2,466 Member
    It is no myth that women want to make us sammiches.

    Myth. I want to make men stir fry or lasagna.


    As long as I'm being fed...
  • sunglasses_and_ocean_waves
    sunglasses_and_ocean_waves Posts: 2,757 Member
    Now here’s the twist: the same system that women are trying to fix hurts men too. It’s not women who enforce the rigid, toxic definitions of masculinity, it’s men.

    The article is blocked at work so will have to read later.

    However, I do not necessarily agree with the quoted statement. I know plenty of women who enforce a rigid definition of masculinity.

    same. I like men to be men not wimps.
  • sunglasses_and_ocean_waves
    sunglasses_and_ocean_waves Posts: 2,757 Member
    question: is the make me a sammich thing really that funny? :yawn: Was it ever?
  • oregonzoo
    oregonzoo Posts: 4,251 Member
    What women want is a lot of things.

    But one thing I know for certain, I'd really rather not have my needs and wants lumped in with the rest of womenkind.

    We do like to harbor this little fantasy that we are special snowflakes.
  • spade117
    spade117 Posts: 2,466 Member
    question: is the make me a sammich thing really that funny? :yawn: Was it ever?

    Sammiches taste good. Similar to the bacon=funny situation.
  • DBoone85
    DBoone85 Posts: 916 Member
    It is no myth that women want to make us sammiches.

    When I'm done with you, you will be making me sammiches.

    I don't even know you and I would make you a sammich....
  • kgeyser
    kgeyser Posts: 22,505 Member
    I want ice cream. And to not have my thoughts and feelings co-opted by others on the basis of having girl parts. But mostly ice cream.
  • maab_connor
    maab_connor Posts: 3,927 Member
    gender binary pisses me off. i'm glad to see that some ppl are writing from a more enlightened place. and i DO agree that society can be just as hard on men for not fitting an outdated stereotype as it can on women.

    You know I agree.

    I'm all man. And I love the musical episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer.

    No shame in my game.

    b/c it's AWESOME!
  • SunofaBeach14
    SunofaBeach14 Posts: 4,899 Member
    I want ice cream. And to not have my thoughts and feelings co-opted by others on the basis of having girl parts. But mostly ice cream.

    ^ I've long suspected that the secret path to a woman's heart has something to do with ice cream and/or pancakes, or some mysterious combination of the two. I'm sure that for $29.99 plus shipping and handling these secrets are revealed somewhere on the interwebs.
  • LoneWolf_70
    LoneWolf_70 Posts: 1,151 Member
    It is no myth that women want to make us sammiches.

    When I'm done with you, you will be making me sammiches.

    that would be ok too.
  • likitisplit
    likitisplit Posts: 9,420 Member
    I want:
    - My kids to stop hitting each other
    - One day a week, where everything but me stops so I can catch up
    - My work calendar and my phone to synch
    - To be able to recover faster from workouts

    I'm pretty confident that I'm speaking for all women-kind here.

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