Boyfriend refuses to respect that I want to workout alone?

is he scared you will run off

Are you really telling him to go away or only half heartedly? Are you like......'giggle', oh go away. Or are you "LEAVE ME ALONE TILL I'M DONE" OR "NOW WHAT?, I'M IN THE MIDDLE OF SOMETHING HERE...GO DO YOUR THING"

Or maybe you could find a middle ground of agreeing to take a break at a specific time where you two can chat for a couple minutes but the rest of the time do your own thing.

OP, you have some issues that you may want to work on.

Option one....either smoke screen when you are going......so he does not know when you are there if possible

Option 2......Or sit down and discuss proper gym etiquette when you are there toether....nice but firm

I have had both GF who want to go and just chit chat and GF who want to actually work out....its not an hour long date...its a work out..


I think it is hot to have a female that works out and can make it through one of your work outs

I work out with my hubby about once a week for a run. he is faster than me but slows down to run with me. Then puts his headphones in and ignores me (i dont listen to music when i run). I never saw the point in that. I guess there is no point to my post either, except I have a husband who wants to run with me but compeltely ignore me during said run. But Im ok with that.

Tell him the truth maybe? at a neutral time?

I can't believe he actually lets you dictate when he is allowed at the gym. If I were him and I got there early, I would not leave just because you said so. Poor guy.

I'd flat out tell her how ridiculous she is being.

My partner and I have a couples membership at our gym. My partner is fit. Very healthy. He runs and lifts. He used to be a trainer - he has retained a really healthy lifestyle.

I am TOTALLY chubby. Literally - a proper Thigh Slapping Chubs.

I LOVE going to the gym with him.

I don't expect to achieve what he achieves. I maintain my expectations and work to them. I talk openly about what I weigh (a lot more than him) and he encourages me to feel great about myself.

We have COMPLETELY different routines at the gym. Try to make an agreement that you can go to the gym, but not interact. ASK him NOT to stand on a machine next to yours. Let him be there, but tell him you need to have space and focus. We arrive together and then separate for the duration as we both want to focus and stay true to our goals. We sometimes stretch together if we finish at the same time - but mostly, he comes and finds me, says he's going to the sauna and I say, "Cool". We then meet in the lobby at about 8pm (or whatever time). Going together is GREAT. I never ask him what his calories are like and how fast he runs, but I LOVE telling him how I'm doing. He is a massive support and advocate for me. No pressure - just love. He also LOVES that we go together. I was actually super self conscious initially - and then realised - it's pretty cool that he's there. It's silent support. My best friend is with me while I'm sweating and heaving. Wonderful.

You need to talk to your partner and set boundaries. Tell him if you go together, you want to be independent in that moment. No chatting, no standing next to each other - just two independent people working out. You arrive together, separate, leave together. That would be a good concession from you, because he clearly wants to spend time with you. Set the boundaries and you'll keep your focus.

If it doesn't work - at least you tried to concede something. If it still distracts you and ruins your workout - then get him to stop coming at the same time... You need to talk to him clearly and openly so he understands. He certainly doesn't right now.

Good luck!

Seriously, tell him, straight up.

I've gone running with a few significant others now, and I set the pace. I have my headphones in, and I'm ignoring him, no matter what he's doing. Run time is my time. They all respect that.

I prefer to work out alone also. Which is why I don't work out at a gym. I work out at home, in my basement. I have all the equipment I need.

I think you have some control issues. You seem to be pretty bossy with your BF while it seems he wants to encourage you and spend time with you.

Why not just tell him, "hey, we can go to the gym together but, I need to focus and don't want to be interrupted during my workout so, we'll hook back up after we're both done"?

So a couple months into our relationship, he switched gyms and joined mine. Makes sense, he used to go to the YMCA, but mines 24/7 so it's more convenient. Initially our schedules didnt allow us to go to the gym at the same time, but for the past few months he's been always available and asks to join me. I'd say yes, but it started negatively impacting my workouts. Maybe I'm crazy, but seeing him there discourages me. He's always looking over at me, dropping by to say hello between his sets, blah. It just drains my focus and if he does something with me, like running, he always does it better which also makes me feel kinda discouraged. If I'm running 6 mph, he's running 9. I know he's a boy, I know he's more in shape (in the army) but for some reason it still gets to me. And he'd ask me how many miles I did, how many calories I burned, etc. I hate it. I find working out to be a private affair.

So, I started telling him to go to the gym after I'm done. And if he comes earlier I tell him either he leaves, or I leave and come back later. He usually leaves. I told him numerous times that we can't work out together and he doesn't listen. He even asks to join me, when he knows that I hate it when he does. It just puts me in a position of either being a ***** or sacrificing the intensity of my workout. He Still has a membership at the YMCA by the way, and that's much closer to his house. He didn't even regularly work out till he started dating me.

:-( advice?

Reading the bold words from your quote have you ever thought
1) You may be inspiring and motivating him
2) His theory maybe couples who work out together have strong bonds.

Talk to him. Ask him what he thinks about you and him working out together. He has the answer.