Joint Facebook Account w/ Your SO?
Replies
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Another issue with this kind of thing is Facebook is a way that friends communicate with each other. I have friends who have confided things to me that are very personal and none of my fiance's business. They don't affect me, him or us as a couple. My friends should be able to feel comfortable that if they send me a PM, text or email that I am going to be the one reading it.I think its awesome when couples don't hide things. I have friends who share fb pages with their spouses and it works for them.
My husband and I don't "hide" things from each other, but we still allow one another to be individuals. We don't routinely log into each others' accounts, but the majority of the time we fail to log out of our own. There have been many times when we'll be scrolling through the feed for a minute or two before we realize "oops, this isn't my account!" but neither of us see it as a big deal because...we have nothing to hide.
Yep, that works for you - that's great!
People that have shared accounts, email addresses etc can do that and still "allow each other to be individuals" though.
My individuality isn't tied up with my email address.
Having a joint account can shut down communication with my friends because they won't feel comfortable communicating that way.0 -
I think it just depends on how the individuals utilize social media, you know? If you each used it for chatting all the time, etc., then perhaps a joint account may be odd, in that it implies your partner must be able to view all your chat history. However, if they just keep it around to post a few pics for the family, maybe receive event invites as they occur, I suppose it makes sense.
This is a great point. I know old married couples who do this for sure. Another less attractive reason, is how people tend to want to appear "so in love and connected" on facebook. It's another façade. Why else would you have your names show up together?0 -
Nopeeee nope nope nope. I am my own person. He is his own person. Not every single thing that I do is his business, or vice versa. I think that's waaaay too codependent (for my tastes, anyway) and also, kind of silly.0
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Being friends with married friends who have the same fb account - I hate it!! I never know who's doing the 'typing'. Am i talking to the husband or the wife. Not to mention I think it's DEFINITELY ok, to have your own hobbies, interests and if my husband wants to like Yogapants on fb - i don't want that crap on mine! haha!:bigsmile:0
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Another issue with this kind of thing is Facebook is a way that friends communicate with each other. I have friends who have confided things to me that are very personal and none of my fiance's business. They don't affect me, him or us as a couple. My friends should be able to feel comfortable that if they send me a PM, text or email that I am going to be the one reading it.I think its awesome when couples don't hide things. I have friends who share fb pages with their spouses and it works for them.
My husband and I don't "hide" things from each other, but we still allow one another to be individuals. We don't routinely log into each others' accounts, but the majority of the time we fail to log out of our own. There have been many times when we'll be scrolling through the feed for a minute or two before we realize "oops, this isn't my account!" but neither of us see it as a big deal because...we have nothing to hide.
Yep, that works for you - that's great!
People that have shared accounts, email addresses etc can do that and still "allow each other to be individuals" though.
My individuality isn't tied up with my email address.
Having a joint account can shut down communication with my friends because they won't feel comfortable communicating that way.
So they confide in you through Facebook and not on the phone?:huh:0 -
Both. Sometimes in person. Sometimes they confide in me and then later want to talk about it and sometimes FB is the most convenient place. Or they might mention it as part of another conversation.
Another issue with this kind of thing is Facebook is a way that friends communicate with each other. I have friends who have confided things to me that are very personal and none of my fiance's business. They don't affect me, him or us as a couple. My friends should be able to feel comfortable that if they send me a PM, text or email that I am going to be the one reading it.I think its awesome when couples don't hide things. I have friends who share fb pages with their spouses and it works for them.
My husband and I don't "hide" things from each other, but we still allow one another to be individuals. We don't routinely log into each others' accounts, but the majority of the time we fail to log out of our own. There have been many times when we'll be scrolling through the feed for a minute or two before we realize "oops, this isn't my account!" but neither of us see it as a big deal because...we have nothing to hide.
Yep, that works for you - that's great!
People that have shared accounts, email addresses etc can do that and still "allow each other to be individuals" though.
My individuality isn't tied up with my email address.
Having a joint account can shut down communication with my friends because they won't feel comfortable communicating that way.
So they confide in you through Facebook and not on the phone?:huh:
We communicate in many different ways. What difference does it make? If this were the time before phones or the Internet and they sent me a letter, would my SO automatically be included in that letter?0 -
Another issue with this kind of thing is Facebook is a way that friends communicate with each other. I have friends who have confided things to me that are very personal and none of my fiance's business. They don't affect me, him or us as a couple. My friends should be able to feel comfortable that if they send me a PM, text or email that I am going to be the one reading it.I think its awesome when couples don't hide things. I have friends who share fb pages with their spouses and it works for them.
My husband and I don't "hide" things from each other, but we still allow one another to be individuals. We don't routinely log into each others' accounts, but the majority of the time we fail to log out of our own. There have been many times when we'll be scrolling through the feed for a minute or two before we realize "oops, this isn't my account!" but neither of us see it as a big deal because...we have nothing to hide.
Yep, that works for you - that's great!
People that have shared accounts, email addresses etc can do that and still "allow each other to be individuals" though.
My individuality isn't tied up with my email address.
Having a joint account can shut down communication with my friends because they won't feel comfortable communicating that way.
Yes I can an see this could be an issue for you.
As I said, I am not on Facebook - however nobody sends me very confidential personal emails. It is also obvious our email address is a shared one - it is mrandmrspudding@blahblah. No one is sending emails expecting them to only be read by me.0 -
Exactly. It shuts down a mode of communication between you and anyone who might want to confide in you. I'm not talking about men hitting on you kind of things, but just friends who need someone to listen. And some people find writing things out easier than talking, too.
Another issue with this kind of thing is Facebook is a way that friends communicate with each other. I have friends who have confided things to me that are very personal and none of my fiance's business. They don't affect me, him or us as a couple. My friends should be able to feel comfortable that if they send me a PM, text or email that I am going to be the one reading it.I think its awesome when couples don't hide things. I have friends who share fb pages with their spouses and it works for them.
My husband and I don't "hide" things from each other, but we still allow one another to be individuals. We don't routinely log into each others' accounts, but the majority of the time we fail to log out of our own. There have been many times when we'll be scrolling through the feed for a minute or two before we realize "oops, this isn't my account!" but neither of us see it as a big deal because...we have nothing to hide.
Yep, that works for you - that's great!
People that have shared accounts, email addresses etc can do that and still "allow each other to be individuals" though.
My individuality isn't tied up with my email address.
Having a joint account can shut down communication with my friends because they won't feel comfortable communicating that way.
Yes I can an see this could be an issue for you.
As I said, I am not on Facebook - however nobody sends me very confidential personal emails. It is also obvious our email address is a shared one - it is mrandmrspudding@blahblah. No one is sending emails expecting them to only be read by me.
They simply don't have the option.
Or what if you wanted to plan a surprise for your spouse and needed to communicate digitally with the other people involved? You can't because he or she has access to these things. There are a lot of reasons to have private/separate accounts for email or FB or whatever that have nothing to do with hiding things that shouldn't be hidden.
Years ago, email accounts actually cost money so people opened joint accounts. Or even if you use it for things you both need access to, I get that. But to not also have something of your own (in most cases, especially with the younger generations) I just don't get. Facebook more than email, though, because FB is a lot more than just a communication tool.0 -
^ no you have misunderstood what I was saying.
I really don't think people would communicate personal confidential information to me via email if I had my own account.
I am saying because nobody in my circle of friends/ family does this, I have no need for a separate account - not that having a joint account is stopping them doing it.
There may well be a lot of reasons for YOU or other people to have separate emails. That's fine
I didn't say the only reason was to hide things?
But there isn't a reason for me to have one - so I don't.
(If I was planning a surprise for my spouse I would do it by phone)0 -
Another issue with this kind of thing is Facebook is a way that friends communicate with each other. I have friends who have confided things to me that are very personal and none of my fiance's business. They don't affect me, him or us as a couple. My friends should be able to feel comfortable that if they send me a PM, text or email that I am going to be the one reading it.I think its awesome when couples don't hide things. I have friends who share fb pages with their spouses and it works for them.
My husband and I don't "hide" things from each other, but we still allow one another to be individuals. We don't routinely log into each others' accounts, but the majority of the time we fail to log out of our own. There have been many times when we'll be scrolling through the feed for a minute or two before we realize "oops, this isn't my account!" but neither of us see it as a big deal because...we have nothing to hide.
Yep, that works for you - that's great!
People that have shared accounts, email addresses etc can do that and still "allow each other to be individuals" though.
My individuality isn't tied up with my email address.
Having a joint account can shut down communication with my friends because they won't feel comfortable communicating that way.
So they confide in you through Facebook and not on the phone?:huh:
My sister and I often have conversations through Facebook's private messenger, usually about our mom and her care. These are conversations that we wouldn't necessarily have by phone because we don't want our mom (who is very easily agitated) or whomever may be around to hear what we are saying. I honestly can't remember the last time we had a phone conversation...it's almost always through FB Messenger, text, or in person.0
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