Not sure what to do.
jjdiggy
Posts: 172
My father just came back from a grocery shop with food for tonight. Before I started dieting we would have 'family nights in' whereby we watched films and ate snacks. He mentioned he wanted to make a pie (and kindly bought all 'less fat, less calorie' ingredients) and I was reluctant to wanting to eat it, but having added it to my MFP diary, it fits into my daily allowance with 1% under on fat, protein and 2% over on carbs - and also leaving me 182 calories under my RDA.
For 'afters' to watch movies with, he bought me a large bag of Skittles. Now, I haven't eaten Skittles in WELL over 4 months - and I'm not kidding I was ADDICTED to them. They were all I ever used to eat and I much preferred them over chocolate. When he told me I thought he was joking, especially since I told him this morning I've lost another 2lbs, and I (admittedly) shouted at him saying it was insensitive. Now that I know they were INTENDED for me, and that they're in my cupboards I have no idea what to do. This is what caused me to crash and burn last year when he bought a pack of cookies for me and I thought I would treat myself to 1....which turned into the whole pack.
It's easy to say 'just don't eat them' but I used to eat them ALL the time and they're the one thing I miss having the most, but I know they're really unhealthy..should I just throw them away? I haven't eaten candy in 4 months.
Any advice is appreciated.
For 'afters' to watch movies with, he bought me a large bag of Skittles. Now, I haven't eaten Skittles in WELL over 4 months - and I'm not kidding I was ADDICTED to them. They were all I ever used to eat and I much preferred them over chocolate. When he told me I thought he was joking, especially since I told him this morning I've lost another 2lbs, and I (admittedly) shouted at him saying it was insensitive. Now that I know they were INTENDED for me, and that they're in my cupboards I have no idea what to do. This is what caused me to crash and burn last year when he bought a pack of cookies for me and I thought I would treat myself to 1....which turned into the whole pack.
It's easy to say 'just don't eat them' but I used to eat them ALL the time and they're the one thing I miss having the most, but I know they're really unhealthy..should I just throw them away? I haven't eaten candy in 4 months.
Any advice is appreciated.
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Replies
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If you don't trust yourself I'd say throw them away. You don't want to ruin all the good work you've done. Kudos for getting off the sweets!0
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seriously. if you're the only one who eats them, throw them away. Calmly, and sincerely thank your dad for thinking of you, since buying you treats you like is one way people show they care, then throw them out when he's not looking.
Also, maybe ask your dad to give you a portion of the grocery budget so you can buy your own foods. And then just eat your own foods.0 -
This might seem like a ridiculous thing to do, but why don't you weight out small amounts of the skittles into portions and put them in sandwich bags (or something similar) so that if you're tempted you can eat the allotted amount, know the calorific value and treat yourself without knowing you haven't gone overboard.
I find that when something is in a pack it's easy just to say "I'll finish the pack" so in making the "pack" smaller it will mean you can do this without going over your calories or feeling guilty.0 -
This might seem like a ridiculous thing to do, but why don't you weight out small amounts of the skittles into portions and put them in sandwich bags (or something similar) so that if you're tempted you can eat the allotted amount, know the calorific value and treat yourself without knowing you haven't gone overboard.
I find that when something is in a pack it's easy just to say "I'll finish the pack" so in making the "pack" smaller it will mean you can do this without going over your calories or feeling guilty.
^^^ this I do it with trail mix or buy the snack packs of m&ms not that I've been eating them lately.0 -
My downfall is M&Ms. So I actually COUNT OUT a portion (between 15 and 50, depending on what my calories and macros are for the day) and then put the rest AWAY.
This has worked well for me, knowing I don't HAVE to give up a favorite fun food. And just knowing they are there, I can actually ignore them for a week or two at a time now.0 -
Eat a little. Restricting something completely makes a lot of people end up binging. It isn't about cutting things out, barring medical conditions. It's learning when enough is enough.0
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If you don't trust yourself I'd say throw them away. You don't want to ruin all the good work you've done. Kudos for getting off the sweets!
It's not that I don't trust myself, because I feel I have better self control now. I think the *most* unhealthiest thing I ate was a ice-cream sundae with toffee, brownie and syrup. I couldn't even finish it and it didn't taste as good as I thought....but it didn't crash my diet...I just moved on.
But these sweets are my all time favorite, and knowing I have a bag of them calling my name from the cupboards is an awful feeling.0 -
....but it didn't crash my diet...I just moved on.
This is what success will be for you, in a nutshell. Just keep going, no matter what "slip-ups" happen. You've already proven you can do that.
:-)0 -
Yikes! A teenager yelling at poor ol dad.
Well he might have kind of deserved it, but still, tis brutal
So I'm guessing it's his house and he can buy **** if he wants. I would try to talk with him and let him know that you no longer have room in your diet for massive quantities of skittles, perhaps a smaller bag? Or maybe you two could sit together and brainstorm options that won't burn down the calorie bank. As for the actual bag, I would be inclined to throw it away or maybe give it away to some friends/relatives. Or have him keep it in his room or something if he wants to eat it. So Long as he doesn't pull a "WHAT THE HELL DID YOU DO TO MY FOOD!!" I'm guessing you should be fine!0 -
This might seem like a ridiculous thing to do, but why don't you weight out small amounts of the skittles into portions and put them in sandwich bags (or something similar) so that if you're tempted you can eat the allotted amount, know the calorific value and treat yourself without knowing you haven't gone overboard.
I find that when something is in a pack it's easy just to say "I'll finish the pack" so in making the "pack" smaller it will mean you can do this without going over your calories or feeling guilty.
This. Or give it to a friend/relative. Throwing away food is a terrible habit.0 -
This might seem like a ridiculous thing to do, but why don't you weight out small amounts of the skittles into portions and put them in sandwich bags (or something similar) so that if you're tempted you can eat the allotted amount, know the calorific value and treat yourself without knowing you haven't gone overboard.
I find that when something is in a pack it's easy just to say "I'll finish the pack" so in making the "pack" smaller it will mean you can do this without going over your calories or feeling guilty.
I have actually done this in the past, though not when dieting. I have a thing for (as you stated) 'finishing the pack' so I thought I'd limit myself. I had a bag of Reese's Pieces' and I would weigh a portion out at a time....though I ended up having like 4 30g portions in one night because I felt it wasn't 'enough'. I think now, though, I may have much more self control; considering this is the most weight lost (and lightest I've ever been) in 3 years.0 -
This might seem like a ridiculous thing to do, but why don't you weight out small amounts of the skittles into portions and put them in sandwich bags (or something similar) so that if you're tempted you can eat the allotted amount, know the calorific value and treat yourself without knowing you haven't gone overboard.
I find that when something is in a pack it's easy just to say "I'll finish the pack" so in making the "pack" smaller it will mean you can do this without going over your calories or feeling guilty.
This. Or give it to a friend/relative. Throwing away food is a terrible habit.
Says you
Throwing away food has been one of my biggest diet aids0 -
My downfall is M&Ms. So I actually COUNT OUT a portion (between 15 and 50, depending on what my calories and macros are for the day) and then put the rest AWAY.
This has worked well for me, knowing I don't HAVE to give up a favorite fun food. And just knowing they are there, I can actually ignore them for a week or two at a time now.
Dang I miss my M&Ms, especially PB and crispy. Maybe I should use the will power I have and just portion them out and *as a treat* eat 1 weighed portion when I feel I deserve it.
Then again, I'll end up feeling extremely guilty if I did.
Gah, I'm SO torn.0 -
Dang I miss my M&Ms, especially PB and crispy. Maybe I should use the will power I have and just portion them out and *as a treat* eat 1 weighed portion when I feel I deserve it.
Then again, I'll end up feeling extremely guilty if I did.
Gah, I'm SO torn.
That's a problem. You should not feel guilt for eating anything. You are very young, do you REALLY think you can get through life NEVER eating treats? That's not only unnecessary for weight loss, it's no way to live. You said you're going to end up 180-ish under calories, you should be able to weight out 180 calories of Skittles and eat them with pleasure.0 -
Eat a little. Restricting something completely makes a lot of people end up binging. It isn't about cutting things out, barring medical conditions. It's learning when enough is enough.
I completely agree that this is the sane and rational thing to do - however as someone who has REPEATEDLY eaten all the crisps that I bought for the kids because once I have one bag I go back and have the other five I would say If you CANNOT stop at a little bit get them out of the house OR
I did this with my birthday chocolate (I was given A LOT) i PUT IT UNDER MY BED it genuinely worked in a case of out of sight out of mind - I did eat it in chunks as once a big bar is on the go it's hard to put down but there is STILL some left and it was 2 months ago! Perhaps your Dad would hide portions where you have to ask to get some??0 -
Skittles are not "food." They are junk. Throw them away or give them away.0
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Are you of legal drinking age in your country?
Use the skittles to make these, and then give them away to your friends.
http://mixthatdrink.com/skittles-vodka-tutorial/0 -
Dang I miss my M&Ms, especially PB and crispy. Maybe I should use the will power I have and just portion them out and *as a treat* eat 1 weighed portion when I feel I deserve it.
Then again, I'll end up feeling extremely guilty if I did.
Gah, I'm SO torn.
That's a problem. You should not feel guilt for eating anything. You are very young, do you REALLY think you can get through life NEVER eating treats? That's not only unnecessary for weight loss, it's no way to live. You said you're going to end up 180-ish under calories, you should be able to weight out 180 calories of Skittles and eat them with pleasure.
I guess. I actually ended up eating less of my meal so it gives me a good 347 calories left. Not to say I have to eat that much now, but we'll see.0 -
There are snack size baggies. I'd seperate the whole bag and allow one a day. If I could. If its a binge trigger for you (oreos and nutella are for me so I do not keep them in the house ever,but I have a binge eating disorder) I'd say get rid of them. But if you can,allow a reasonable premeasured portion.0
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Dang I miss my M&Ms, especially PB and crispy. Maybe I should use the will power I have and just portion them out and *as a treat* eat 1 weighed portion when I feel I deserve it.
Then again, I'll end up feeling extremely guilty if I did.
Gah, I'm SO torn.
That's a problem. You should not feel guilt for eating anything. You are very young, do you REALLY think you can get through life NEVER eating treats? That's not only unnecessary for weight loss, it's no way to live. You said you're going to end up 180-ish under calories, you should be able to weight out 180 calories of Skittles and eat them with pleasure.
^^^ This. Feeling guilty about eating sweets or other types of food (labeling food "good" or "bad") is disordered thinking and it's what lead to failure after failure in the past (for me). This time around I'm not restricting anything, just making sure it fits in my daily intake goal. I have ice cream or some other dessert every single day and it hasn't hurt my progress even a little bit. I've taken the weight off, done a successful bulk, and maintained (all over the past 2 years). First time in my life I've been able to do anything even remotely like that - control my weight (and in different ways!). You have to start building a new relationship with food, bud. It's not the enemy.0 -
This might seem like a ridiculous thing to do, but why don't you weight out small amounts of the skittles into portions and put them in sandwich bags (or something similar) so that if you're tempted you can eat the allotted amount, know the calorific value and treat yourself without knowing you haven't gone overboard.
I find that when something is in a pack it's easy just to say "I'll finish the pack" so in making the "pack" smaller it will mean you can do this without going over your calories or feeling guilty.
This. Or give it to a friend/relative. Throwing away food is a terrible habit.
Says you
Throwing away food has been one of my biggest diet aids
:huh: Way to waste valuable resources (and I don't mean your money, that's up to you). If you buy food and then not eat it, why not at least give it to a local food bank? Or plan and buy only food you're actually gonna eat?0 -
Maybe measure out a 200 calorie portion, give the rest away, then plan to sit down and really enjoy your m & m 's with a favourite beverage?
I live with people who eat big steaks, bring home sushi at 11:00 pm, make a pizza just as I'm going to bed and put chocolate and potato chips (my fav) in the pantry. They're all healthy and slim, I have no right to change them or accuse them of sabotage. I can just make plans for myself for how to work around this.0 -
To start with you need to relax and not yell at your father.
You're 18 and have a lot of life ahead of you, you're way ahead of the game in that you realize that you might have some issues with food. For the rest of your life you're going to be around food and maybe people that aren't good for you, learn to deal with the foods that you have issues with, learn to say no and if you fail don't beat yourself up over it. Skittles are just another food item that you can choose to eat or not, make your decision and trust in yourself.0 -
There are snack size baggies. I'd seperate the whole bag and allow one a day. If I could. If its a binge trigger for you (oreos and nutella are for me so I do not keep them in the house ever,but I have a binge eating disorder) I'd say get rid of them. But if you can,allow a reasonable premeasured portion.
I guess that's a smart thing to do. Plus when I exercise tonight, that'll burn away some space for them to not affect my body.0 -
Moderation works for some things and not for others, just as it works for some people and not for others. Its perfectly acceptable to be able to admit to yourself you simply can't have certain things as you know from experience they're simply too dangerous to overeat on them. If thats the case for you here, chuck them I say! Of course back when I lost weight years ago, I wasn't above spitting something out that I ate without thinking, and attribute it as a diet aid until I learned not to eat so compulsively.
Until you can safely handle having something like trigger foods around, I say keep them away as much as you can. One day you may or may not be able to deal with such foods better, but until that point, I say act like its guerilla warfare, and do what you have to!
EDIT: there are certain foods I know I will never have control over, and know its best to avoid them. Sometimes I can substitute things for them, for example dark chocolate for milk chocolate, but some things there are no substitutes for, and avoidance may be better altogether. For example, without dark chocolate, I know I would have to avoid chocolate entirely, as personally I could never stop at just a square or two of milk chocolate 0 -
This might seem like a ridiculous thing to do, but why don't you weight out small amounts of the skittles into portions and put them in sandwich bags (or something similar) so that if you're tempted you can eat the allotted amount, know the calorific value and treat yourself without knowing you haven't gone overboard.
I find that when something is in a pack it's easy just to say "I'll finish the pack" so in making the "pack" smaller it will mean you can do this without going over your calories or feeling guilty.
This. Or give it to a friend/relative. Throwing away food is a terrible habit.
Says you
Throwing away food has been one of my biggest diet aids
:huh: Way to waste valuable resources (and I don't mean your money, that's up to you). If you buy food and then not eat it, why not at least give it to a local food bank? Or plan and buy only food you're actually gonna eat?
Food banks will take left overs??
I actually buy the 100 calorie Oreo packs and other single serving items for treats I like. However, here are some examples. The other day I came to work and there was a bunch of candy distributed at everyone's desk. I did eat way too much of those when I could have just scooped them all in the trash. Another time I wanted a slice of cheesecake a coworker had brought and two people hounded me because I cut what they thought was one slice into two and it "wouldn't be worth it for someone to make the walk to get this little" and so "they wouldn't feel peer pressure to eat it". I said okay and threw the other piece out when I got to my desk. I would love to buy smaller sizes of graham crackers or saltines for recipes but they only sell the 100 cookie packs for like two bucks, and if the 10 cookie packs exist for the same price I ain't buying it. After making what I need, in the trash the rest goes cos otherwise I'll just keep eating it till it's gone
If you want to help starving people, help starving people. But keeping food that tempts you around rather than use the trash can seems like a waste of successful lbs lost to me0 -
I actually can REALLY relate to your situation. I am grown and married but my family enjoys eating all together and my Husband with a good heart is always subtly sabotaging my efforts. Does it make him a bad guy? Not at all...and I know he doesn't outright want to see me fail...he just wants to enjoy with me the same things he's enjoyed with me for the last ten years. I suspect Dad is feeling the same way about you ... even if it was insensitive.
I think giving them away is a great idea. I'm sure you get together with friends or even work...give them to a coworker or someone you know who has kids. They will be thrilled and you'll have saved yourself the stress of knowing they are in there.
Portioning them out is also a great idea. For me - I don't think I could keep myself from reaching in and grabbing a second or third portion...but that's just me. We are all different.
I know it's tough, it's a struggle every day for me. Learning to handle well intentioned family and friends is a whole other beast of it's own. Hang in there - try to keep your cool if you can. Parents and kids always have a tendency to butt heads at times...I'm sure Dad wants to see you succeed.
Also just touching on the "trash or give away" comments...I mean, it's a $3 bag of skittles. Do what you NEED to do. Do what will make you feel good and as if you've conquered your temptation. I know that I CAN NOT have diet coke or potatoes in the house. Those are just off limit trigger foods for me. I try to give away and get it out when I can...but if I really think that I just CAN NOT refrain from over indulging...I'd rather pitch them then take the chance of them calling my name the day before I'm supposed to meet up with "so and so" to drop them off. LOL
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So I took on board the portioning, and separated them into 30g bags.
I've just put them in the fridge and told my family that if they want a bag, they can take as many as they wish, that way I am not drawn to eating them all.0 -
This is a trigger food for you, I am guessing that you can't just eat a few even if you divide them up into baggies. I understand this, cheese is my trigger food and no matter what I plan or what I tell myself ahead of time I will eat it all once I start.
So my advice is not to eat it. Thank your Dad, then explain that you appreciate him thinking of you but what you really need at the moment is for him to help you by not buying this type of food for you (obviously its his house, he can buy it for himself or other family members but from what I can tell he bought this for you).
Don't look at it, try to give it away as soon as possible.0 -
throw them away!!!!!!! Don't wait to donate -- toss them immediately0
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