Awkward men's room moments

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Replies

  • logiatype
    logiatype Posts: 110 Member
    In elementary school, all the urinals were taken. I'm washing my hands. Another kid runs into the bathroom holding his junk, sees there are no urinals or stalls open, pauses, then gets up real close behind the tallest kid at the urinals, does a half squat, 5 holes the tall kid, and starts pissing through his legs. The tall kid just froze.
    You win
    /thread
  • MadTownD
    MadTownD Posts: 149 Member
    Standing at the urinal at a local bar three sheets to the wind and some guy staggers in and gives me the obligatory "drunken head nod" which I return, and realize he is way too drunk. He steps up to the urinal... starts swaying a bit, leans against the wall, then against the divider, then passes out right there. As he falls, he hits his chin on the urinal. He's laying on the floor bleeding and pi$$ing himself. I step over him thinking I should probably do something, but he's laying there with his junk out and I wasn't sure what to do. So, I wash my hands, and head back out to tell the people at my table what happened. The lady at the next table overhears and says, "That sounds like something my husband would do." It was her husband.
  • iggyboo93
    iggyboo93 Posts: 524 Member
    Not a men's room awkward moment - in a high school girl's locker. I was trying to get my gym shoes on (which were too small at the time - I was growing out of shoes every 2 weeks it seemed). I was grunting and straining to get my shoe on. My classmates thought the noise was coming from the bathroom stall where one of the High School Alpha girls was doing her business in. I never told anyone that it was me making the straining sounds.
  • Pipsg1rl
    Pipsg1rl Posts: 1,414 Member
    In elementary school, all the urinals were taken. I'm washing my hands. Another kid runs into the bathroom holding his junk, sees there are no urinals or stalls open, pauses, then gets up real close behind the tallest kid at the urinals, does a half squat, 5 holes the tall kid, and starts pissing through his legs. The tall kid just froze.

    I read this like 3 times with my mouth hanging open.

    My son and I were at a gas station stop on the way back to Texas from Northwest Florida.

    He's in and out of the men's room. There is someone in the ladies drying their hands. They don't come out.
    I really need to go. I've been waiting.
    More hand drying.
    2 guys have come in and out of the men's room. I'm still waiting.
    Another guy in and out.
    Freaking A

    Finally I'm like ok, if ONE MORE GUY goes in and out of that men's room, I'm using it. That lady is STILL drying her hands. Oh, and some flushing.

    Sure enough. A guy comes in and out. Now they are giving me funny looks because like... I don't know I'm just waiting. My son is waiting for me too!

    I go in. Lock door. aaaaaah .....

    NO TP! OMG FREAKING DUDES! Paper towels - ok ok

    wash the hands, use towel to leave.

    SHE IS STILL IN THAT BATHROOM!

    So I go to the cashier and let them know the men's needs paper and someone may be sick in the ladies.

    Cashier A looks at Cashier B and says "Susan's in the bathroom again."

    Apparently there is a homeless lady or OCD lady that holes herself up in their bathroom and just hangs out.

    I swear it must have been 20 minutes I was there.

    My son was like "what happened??"

    :grumble: lucky me :grumble:
  • Lofteren
    Lofteren Posts: 960 Member
    In elementary school, all the urinals were taken. I'm washing my hands. Another kid runs into the bathroom holding his junk, sees there are no urinals or stalls open, pauses, then gets up real close behind the tallest kid at the urinals, does a half squat, 5 holes the tall kid, and starts pissing through his legs. The tall kid just froze.
    You win
    /thread

    This definitely takes the cake
  • MikeCrazy
    MikeCrazy Posts: 2,716 Member
    In elementary school, all the urinals were taken. I'm washing my hands. Another kid runs into the bathroom holding his junk, sees there are no urinals or stalls open, pauses, then gets up real close behind the tallest kid at the urinals, does a half squat, 5 holes the tall kid, and starts pissing through his legs. The tall kid just froze.
    You win
    /thread

    This definitely takes the cake

    I actually had something like that happen to me in school, two other kids crammed in to pee in my urinal...so not fun.
  • _Waffle_
    _Waffle_ Posts: 13,049 Member
    I swear it must have been 20 minutes I was there.

    Just go in and use the men's. Ain't nobody got time for that. I see it all the time and most guys don't bat an eye at it unless you try to use the urinal. A stall is a stall.
  • Pipsg1rl
    Pipsg1rl Posts: 1,414 Member
    I swear it must have been 20 minutes I was there.

    Just go in and use the men's. Ain't nobody got time for that. I see it all the time and most guys don't bat an eye at it unless you try to use the urinal. A stall is a stall.

    It wasn't a stall situation. It was a 1 door bathroom 1 toilet situation. Otherwise it would have been ok. Besides - men's rooms?? EWWWW!
    I guess they use the toilet less though....
  • SuperVixen2B
    SuperVixen2B Posts: 218 Member
    Two:

    (1) This happened about a week ago. 3 urinals. I take the one on the far left (I always go left), the other 2 are empty. Next dude walks in and steps up TO THE MIDDLE ONE!!! This is a serious friggin violation of all the man rules. He leaves an empty on the right so he can stand next to me!? I don't get stage fright, but I should have turned and pizzed on him for the infraction.

    (2) Every time I use the urinals at Jerome Bettis grill in Pittsburgh. They're awesome. At eye level is a 2-way mirror that looks right out into the bar area. Sometimes you're doing your business and somebody is right on the other side of the mirror "looking" directly at you. Again, I don't suffer from stage fright, but it is a unique experience. I lifted my 7yo son so he could see -- he still doesn't believe the people out there can't see us. Mike Greenberg (from Mike & Mike on ESPN) is totally freaked out by these urinals and has commented on it on the show from time to time.

    mens-bathroom-urinal-view-bar.jpg

    OMG - I couldn't go like that...waaaay too pee shy. I wonder if they have something similar in the ladies bathrooms...
  • HannahLynn91
    HannahLynn91 Posts: 238 Member
    One time I walked into the locker room at a gym where I used to train and there was an old, hairy guy with one foot on the floor and the other one on top of the counter, Captain Morgan style, while he was BLOW DRYING HIS *kitten*!!!!

    I froze.. I seriously didn't know what to do other than look away. My brother followed me into the locker room and started shouting at the guy, "What the hell are you doing, dude? No one wants to see that siht!" Then the old guy looks up with a "where am I?" Kind of look and my brother and I just broke out laughing for about 5 minutes straight.

    This is hilarious. Kinda reminds me of Bad Grandpa haha
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  • logiatype
    logiatype Posts: 110 Member
    Number 2'd in the office toilet only to find out the water in the building was suddenly not working (work going on in the complex) and I couldn't flush. Slipped out of there and discreetly told the office manager. Thankfully, we're close friends :embarassed:
  • HannahLynn91
    HannahLynn91 Posts: 238 Member
    This isn't so much an awkward men's room moment for me, but a women's room.

    I work in a small office building and see most of the other tenets daily through walking to the bathroom or mail room. One day I'm walking to the bathroom (two stall bathroom) and a lady from a few offices down from mine is right behind me, so we enter the bathroom together. I do not know this lady and maybe have said hi to her a couple times. As we sit down to do the do, she strikes up a conversation with me about the weather... of all things. I was taken aback, but since she acted like this was the most normal time to have a conversation, I chatted back.... albeit very shortly.

    Since then, whenever we are in the bathroom together she chats.... It's painfully awkward.
  • cortezpj
    cortezpj Posts: 129 Member
    I had dinner with around a dozen family members who were visiting from out of town at a really nice Italian restaurant in a refurbished old building. Everyone was admiring the architecture and a lof the old details. My 16-year old niece excused herself from the table to go to the restroom and several minutes later I decided to wash up, too. I open the door to the small men's room to find my niece inside washing her hands and looking in the mirror without a care in the world. We both looked at each other with a WTF sort of expression. Then I pointed to the men's room sign on the door and we both broke out laughing.

    Later on she claimed that she was distracted by some of the artwork leading to the restrooms.
  • Dogwalkingirl
    Dogwalkingirl Posts: 320 Member
    When i was young I went to a summer camp. It was a boys camp for one week and a girls camp for one week so the bathroom had a urinal in it. Someone dared me to squat and pee in the urinal ...I am not one to turn down a dare!
  • RaggedyPond
    RaggedyPond Posts: 1,487 Member
    I use the men's room when they are cleaning the women's bathroom. Nobody says a thing. They just nod like whats up.
  • RaggedyPond
    RaggedyPond Posts: 1,487 Member
    There is a certain store every time I go there I have to take a poo. And every time I poo there I clog the toilet. Wondering if the workers see me coming.
  • cherrilovee
    cherrilovee Posts: 194 Member
    I was 14 & a freshman in high school. I accidentally walked into the guys bathroom and felt so awkward I just FROZE. I couldn't walk out, I was so embarrassed. There was already two guys in there using the urinals & I was just standing there. Once I finally realized I HAVE TO LEAVE, I turned around and started walking out. As I opened the door, another guy walked in and gave me the most awkwardest look.

    MY LIFE IS AWKWARD.
  • micheledavison39
    micheledavison39 Posts: 821 Member
    Not really a men's bathroom awkward moment...I work part-time at a horse farm and we only have port-a-potties. One Sunday afternoon while working, there are a couple of kids playing hide and seek outside while their parents looked at a horse we had for sale. I was in one of the potties, having a moment and all of the sudden, the door is ripped open (it was latched, but because they sat crooked, the bar only just caught the frame) and this 6-7 year old boy comes busting in and practically lands in my lap. I scream, he screams. I then had to apologize for freaking out at being invaded while getting dirty looks from his parents because the kid won't stop crying!
  • cowbellsandcoffee
    cowbellsandcoffee Posts: 2,975 Member
    If I have to pee and there's a line for the women's bathroom, I have no problem popping a squat in the men's bathroom.

    That brings up a interesting issue. If a guy NEEDS a stall and the men's side is full, is it acceptable to use the women's?

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