Un-supportive family?

:laugh: i was going to say something mean, but i wont say that. tell him you are either with me or against me, you pick which one it is.

i have the same prob my family thinks im fine but the doc says i need to lose thirty pounds to be in my height weight average, i would just explain to him that you are trying to to this for you and to make you happy and that if he wants something that you know you cant have to go ahead but like a few people told me that you have to reward yourself every once in a while otherwise it seems like you want it more just tell them that you are trying to make a healthier and happier you and if they cant understand that then they are selfish, i know exsacly what you are going through its glad to know that im not the only one

My EX used to say, If you just eat what I make you, you'll lose weight. Problem was, I normally hated what he was cooking!!!! There's a REASON why he's an ex!!!

significant others are NOTORIOUS for being the most unhelpful person for a diet. you need to talk to him about this. tell him you're trying to lose weight and if he says "i think you look great the way you are" come back with "while thats sweet i'm not doing this for you. this is for me." and if he's a smart man he'll shut his mouth and start supporting you in this. if he's not............punch him in the nose :devil: :laugh:

Punch him on the nose :devil:

LMAO!!!

maybe if you showed him how you have to log your food he would get a better idea? if not, throat punch....:devil:

LOL I'm down for the throat punch idea!
Without knowing anything about you or your relationship it's hard to say. Some guys get insecure when their wife wants to lose weight in fear that she will get more attention, or seek someone else with her hot new body. I would explain to him you're trying to lose weight. Show him the website. Explain why proper portions are good, and why ice cream isn't good :-\ Then tell him he needs to be supportive of what you're trying to accomplish. If he has a problem after that, then you need to ask him, and address it. Maybe he feels if you lose weight, he will have to do the same? Again, withouth knowing you, these are some ideas. And if there don't work....kicking him square in his @$$ is a great way to start exercising :-)

My husband isn't much better. You may just have to sit him down and tell him he is hurting your feelings when he acts this way and explain how important it is for you to be healthy and stick to your diet. If that doesn't work then I'm not sure?? I tend to make my own dinner and if my husband(who won't eat fruit or vegies) won't eat what I make then he makes his own. I'll add that I try to make dinners we can both enjoy when our work schedules allow us time to eat together.

Is he interested in shaving a few lbs. as well? It's a 100% easier if you guys are both chasing the same goal.

I bet he's the one who buys the ice cream, too? That's how it is in my family. My husband thinks the rest of the family shouldn't have to "suffer" because I (and one of my daughters) don't have self control around food. So he buys chips, ice cream, and orders pizza a lot. I buy alot of fruit and veggies and eat a frozen Weight Watchers pizza as they eat Papa John's. Our younger daughter is now starting to have a weight problem and he still insists that overeating is our issue, he's always been lean and he'll encourage her to exercise, but there's no way he'll stop buying what he likes to eat. He has agreed to hide his "goodies" at least, but doesn't always remember. Honestly, that is part of the reason I am on MFP. There is support here when there's none at home.

Good luck to you!

Also sending friend request...

I think if that were my situation, I would open up the topic directly using a reflexive listening approach, sharing how you perceive his behavior, to see if his response will provide some insight into the intent behind his behavior. Sometimes there's wide gap between what someone means and how it comes across.

"I feel like you get angry when I say I don't want ice cream. If so, why does this make you mad?"

Support within the home is really important - and I think support can simply be your family respecting your choices and not trying to derail you. I don't think my husband necessarily agrees with my assessment that I needed to lose some weight. I knew he was OK with it when he recently picked up a salad for me for dinner, and he thought to get the low cal dressing which he never had before.

Good luck!

I try my best to just ignore him, but my husband isn't very helpful for achieving my weight loss goals. After dinner and I put my daughter to bed he asks if I want ice cream and I say no. He gets mad and says "FINE then I won't have any either!" We take turn cooking some times, and if he thinks I didn't get a big enough portion of what he cooks, he gets offended. As I said, I'm trying to just ignore it, but its hard. Any tips?

My husband is very supportive, but wasn't always at first. He wasn't trying to sabatoge me, but he really just didn't understand how serious I was being about accomplishing this. It seemed like it took about half of my weight lost before he really understood that I was never going to have ice cream when I said I didn't want any and that if I was going to splurge, I had to make the decision myself. For some reason, he took it personally a lot at first, but finally he just started understanding my mindset.

Now, he's on MFP with me and wanting to make changes himself. He is making them very slowly, which is the way it works for him. I encourage him, but never, never have I judged him for falling short on working out or not eating better. I didn't like someone trying to affect the choices I made, so I won't do the same to him.

My husband is supportive of me (thankfully) tho at times has no problem speaking his mind about anything. He is by far the biggest binge eater I know ....so when he is devouring 2 sleeves of Oreo cookies at one sitting, I just eat my greek yogurt or healthy pop popcorn and think to myself how much healthier I am being. I am not and will never be a nagging wife, because that's not communication its just passive aggressive. He is a big boy and can make his own decisions health wise be they good or bad. Often times his "binges" lead me to be more motivated!!!!!! Hang in there, you can do this we will be your support. Sounds like hubby is just dealing with his own insecurities around your weight loss

I bet he's the one who buys the ice cream, too? That's how it is in my family. My husband thinks the rest of the family shouldn't have to "suffer" because I (and one of my daughters) don't have self control around food. So he buys chips, ice cream, and orders pizza a lot. I buy alot of fruit and veggies and eat a frozen Weight Watchers pizza as they eat Papa John's. Our younger daughter is now starting to have a weight problem and he still insists that overeating is our issue, he's always been lean and he'll encourage her to exercise, but there's no way he'll stop buying what he likes to eat. He has agreed to hide his "goodies" at least, but doesn't always remember. Honestly, that is part of the reason I am on MFP. There is support here when there's none at home.

Good luck to you!

Also sending friend request...

Personally (and please don't take this wrong) I believe in everything (mostly) in moderation. However if something is a 'trigger' food then it should be avoided until control is easier and its inconsiderate of him to consistantly bring it infront of you and your daughter who are trying hard to do things right. May also suggest that if diet isn't the total issue you and your daughter may want to have the dr do a thyroid test. My mom and I have hypothyroid which makes it significantly harder to lose weight, even with healthy diet and exercise. I wish you both good luck

I actually do have an underactive thyroid...which is why I try extra hard to watch what I eat. I just recently got up to what appears to be a good dosage of levothyroxine, but I still have weight to lose. I should check on my daughter, too--she's only 9 and it seemed like it's something adults get, but that may not be true. Thanks for mentioning it!

How much does your husband weigh? Dump him and add the pounds to your totals.

Lol, thats awesome. With all that weight gone, who will keep us women warm :laugh: :blushing:

How much does your husband weigh? Dump him and add the pounds to your totals.

Love it!!

My husband isn't much help either.

Hmmm... Imagine all the calories I'd burn while hauling him off, and digging a hole to bury him in.... *evil cackle*

Punch him on the nose :devil:

I agree!!! LMAO But, seriously I have one too who just doesn't understand and of course when he goes to lose weight its like poof!! I just want to kick him sometimes. He tells me I look fine and that its doesn't matter what do I need to look good for?? Umm hello ME!!! I want to be healthy and see the person inside me in the mirror. Cause I know that when I look in the mirror im not that person. I want it changed!!! You go girl!!!