Moderation DOES NOT WORK for me

unfortunately there aren't many secrets to this- its gonna take serious willpower. but here are some tips that have helped me-

1. I used to binge on junk at night, so now I set aside a good chunk of my calories to eat later in the evening. i'll have pretzel chips, salsa, string cheese, a fiber one brownie, maybe half a bagel even. it makes me feel like I'm gorging but I'm really not since I planned ahead
2. replacing junk with healthier alternatives- you can get pb2 instead of peanut butter, its only 45 cals for 2 tbsp. quest bars are great as well, they taste like candy but are so much better for you. If you want something that is considered 'junk' just get an individual single serving bag instead of eating out of a giant one
3. maybe you could ask your family if they could keep all the junk in a separate cabinet, and have a designated health food cabinet for all your snacks?
4. fruit fruit fruit fruit. throw some dark chocolate chips on there and you're set

but in the end, it will be up to you. if you want junk, just get some exercise and make the room for it!

What you are describing is not moderation. It's all or nothing.

True moderation means you eat healthy food and junk food, but eat the treats in reasonable portions. You can easily make room in your calorie goal for it, especially if you plan ahead.

Whether you say you can or you can't, you're right. Attitude will make or break your experience, so make it a good one!

As a recovering binge eater one thing I can tell you is that the less of the unhealthy stuff you eat the less you will crave it. The more of it you eat the worse it gets. If you can cut out the junk food for a while you will go through a type of withdrawal but once you get past that it gets way easier. I rarely have cravings and when I do it is usually for a particular macro nutrient that I am shy on that day.

However, when I went on a trip last month and was eating out non-stop I didn't make the best choices. As a result, I found those cravings creeping back in I am having to stamp it back out. If you stick with good habits and eat less and less processed junk you will wake up one day and find you are no longer a slave to food.

Good luck

First of all, you don't need to quit any one type of food. If necessary to get use to healthier eating, you may want to suspend it for a bit, but you're not getting rid of it. You need to realize, this is an inside job, no one else can do it for you. If you want it, you will do it and it WILL take work.

Moderation does not work for me when it comes to chocolate. I cannot eat just one Oreo cookie or one chocolate bar. So I try to avoid it all together.

OP: YOU decide what works for you. YOU live in your body. YOU know, or soon will, what works for you.

I eat what I want "in moderation". What I want has changed.

I haven't had a pop tart in 12+ years. I don't eat store-bought cakes etc.

I build a diet around all the foods I want to eat (healthy nutrient dense foods) and then my discretionary calories are mine. Discretionary fritos? For me? NO. Leads to late night snacking.
Discretionary wine? Yup. No issue there.
Discretionary ice cream? Sure, but I choose no sugar added kinds.
oreos and the like? Meh, not worth it.

My pizzas are whole grain. My breads are whole grain, my pastas are whole grain. For ME keeping my blood sugars steady helps me moderate the things I want to eat, and avoid the things I don't want to eat .For me packing my diet full of nutrient dense, whole foods fuels my workouts and helps me manage cravings. Does choosing whole grain, healthier versions of comfort foods make me any less successful at "self control". Feck no.

I once saw a woman say she measured out 9 M&Ms. 9? Hell, I'd rather have none.

YOU decide what works for you.
You do NOT have to eat fast food, junk food, etc. "in moderation" if you don't want you. Some folks do better with a snickers, some folks don't.

A month or so ago I saw person after person saying that choosing NOT to eat pizza showed less control than choosing to eat one slice. Whatever. Eat what YOU want.

Thats ok if moderation isn't your thing. It won't be easy to not eat those foods because of your living situation but the cravings do diminish the less junk you eat.

Whether you say you can or you can't, you're right.

Love that.

The world is full of temptations, the only thing that stands between them and you is self control.

It's the truth.

I've learned that completely eliminating the 'unhealthy' food that we so intensely crave is a surefire way to make us gorge on it. If you make it taboo, you will want it even more.

This may not be relevant for you, but it worked for me. I changed my night time routine (when I would generally snack on unhealthy foods). I used to sit down for the night and watch TV with some chips or ice cream. Now I still watch TV, but while doing other things, sometimes even just during the ad breaks... I do the dishes, clean up, exercise bike, treadmill, knitting, and sometimes I go to bed and watch something since I don't eat in bed, which works well.

I've also (almost accidently) changed the way I have been thinking about food. I'm sick of losing and gaining the same 3-4kgs, and just realised I want to stay on the losing (weight) path and that the foods I often craved and had no self control with just aren't a part of getting to where I want to be - and staying there! Now I don't crave for them ALL night until I give in, which is very new for me. I'm simply off to bed with a hot drink and I'm set.

I have had a packet of timtams sitting in my pantry unopened for ages now, and I haven't even had any urges to open them, which is amazing! I think for me it was all about getting out of the bad habits and forming new habits which aid in my journey, not hinder it.

The world is full of temptations, the only thing that stands between them and you is self control.

This is so zen....and very true! :bigsmile:

OP, that's it. Make your portion and say no to the rest.

Years ago, a doctor told me to lose weight and I said something along the lines that I would have to give up my burritos to do that. She said, "it's not about not have the burrito, it's about having half and saving the rest for another day".

If you are trying to moderate your food and mum loads up your plate, eat your portion and tell her you're saving the rest for tomorrow, and mean it.

This is going to be difficult since you don't have control of your environment since you live at home. These would be my suggestions for you:

(1) Put Off-Limit Foods Out of Sight. Since you can't keep the foods out of your house, ask the other members of your house to put them somewhere out of sight. If you don't have to go into that cupboard with the goodies, that will help with some of the temptation as they won't always be looking you right in the face tempting you. It's easier knowing that they're there than having to actually see them every time you open the cupboard door, challenging your self-control and judgment. Hopefully, one day you'll be somewhere that you can keep such foods out of your house.

(2) Eliminate the Off-Limit Foods from your Diet for 30 days. This allows you to go through the withdrawal part. I know it's really hard, but this will help so much in resetting your taste buds and palate. After 30 days off the foods, you may find that your cravings and tastes change considerably, especially if a lot of your off-limit foods have a lot of added sugar or are highly processed (many of both have addictive-like qualities). I've personally found a Whole 30 or Strict Paleo approach to be very helpful for this "detox" phase. Gives you a good structure to follow, which I find helpful, and generally has good reasons behind the food eliminations. After that, then start working some of the foods you'd like to have back in your diet back in and see how your body responds to them. You may find some startling discoveries -- I know I did.

(3) Find Substitutes for Your Favorites. One of the easiest ways to break a bad habit is to form a new good habit. They say it takes 6 weeks in total to break a bad habit -- 3 weeks to stop the bad habit and 3 more to instill a new healthy habit. If you have a sweet tooth, start focusing on low glycemic fruits -- berries are some of the best -- rather than your past favorites. Try to add in a little fat and/or protein when you eat them -- this will increase satiety and reduce spiking your insulin (leading to later hunger). If you like pasta, try spaghetti squash next time. Lots of good substitutes out there.

(4) Make Sure You're Getting Your Proper Macros and Micros and Eat Nutrient Dense Foods. If you're fueling your body properly, you'll be less susceptible to random cravings for nutrients from random sources.

(5) When You Get a Craving, Drink a Glass of Water Instead. Oftentimes, we mistake thirst for hunger. This becomes more of an issue when we're dehydrated, which can be exacerbated by sugary, salty and/or highly processed foods. If you're still hungry, then focus on your food choices.

(6) Get Enough Protein (at least 0.7 g per lb bodyweight). Protein is highly satiating. People often find that when they up their protein, cravings for certain things can be reduced because they're not as hungry.

(7) Get Enough Sleep and Try to Manage Stress. Lack of sleep and too much stress can really drive cravings, especially for carby or sugary foods. You're tired, so your body tells you to eat something with quick calories (i.e. carbs/sugar) for energy. But that just ends up with people generally overeating or going through nasty sugar crashes. Folks getting enough sleep and managing stress often report less cravings and better weight control -- their hormones aren't all out of whack, trying to compensate for the fatigue.

(8) Exercise. Exercise is one of the best combatants to cravings. Even a brisk walk will release endorphins and soothing neurotransmitters. It helps immensely with stress control, evening out the hormones, etc. -- which all help you make easier and better food choices.

(9) Moderation Isn't For Everyone. And that's okay. It's better to know you, and what works for you rather than to try to follow someone else's path. There are plenty of people that don't do well with moderation. They have to walk different paths. Don't let anyone shame you into this. There is nothing wrong with you that moderation doesn't suit you.

For many things in my life, moderation doesn't work. I'm much more an all-or-nothing person generally. And that's worked for me -- in fact, it's brought me great success in certain things. When I'm out paragliding, I can't crash in moderation. I've got to never crash. So, there is nothing wrong for opting for a diet plan that isn't moderation-based. There are other paths to success as well -- and some don't involve moderation.

What may help you with moderation is to set a rule for yourself to never eat X item unless you already ate items from list Y (list Y being the items that make you full).

If you devour a big salad, a cup of yogurt and some chicken chicken breast you will be physically unable to eat a full pizza but you will have enough calories left over for a slice. One slice would suffice, and in some cases you won't even touch that.

Maybe you can try to start by doing your own pizzas. You can cat the cals/fat down by up to 50% this way. Use low fat cheese, low fat passata (which is already low fat anyways), chicken breast, that sort of thing. If you don't know how to make a pizza base you can buy these ready made or buy ready made dough. It will take some getting used to but you'll get there.

The reason I say this is because I am a massive foodie too and I just love street food. Meat, cheese, onions and a bread - that's me. But I found that when I do these at home, I control the situation very well. So I use lean meats, I sautee with oil spray, I use low fat cheeses, and often I bake my own breads. Ta-da, awesome food at your disposal that fits your macros. But you have to start by understanding your daily allowance and set some realistic goal. Good luck.