Rules in a Military Gym

ABSOLUTE RULES OF A MILITARY GYM
1.Remember there are only 3 muscle groups abdominals, biceps, and abceps or (bidominals if you prefer)
2.No matter what, don’t ever do any leg lifts especially squats; you could hurt your back.
3.If you even remember to wear a shirt, make sure it’s either skin tight meaning if you wear a Large, then buy X-Smalls, or take your normal shirt and cut the sleeves off and tear the side open all the way down to the bottom of the shirt.
4.Always tape the hell out of your wrists and wear ankle braces on chest day
5.When adding weight to the bar always clank the plates together as loud as you can so people know you are adding more weight
6.Do not ever lift weights in a full range of motion, which would be poor form, because seriously we know that you really can bench four plates.
7.When doing bicep curls in front of the mirror with dumbbells always put your water on one bench and your towel on another and then take the third bench to sit on between sets so that no one can get a damn thing done while you do your biceps.
8.When the hot chick walks in stop what you are doing, go immediately to the curl bar and put on your one rep max in weight. Then make sure she is looking at you before you start your reps
9.Remember for every set you do, you must walk around and talk and disturb others for at least 15 minutes before your next set. Don’t over work yourself.
10. Lastly always grunt at the top of your lungs for every rep you are pushing out.