Would you date someone that has no job

24

Replies

  • Forty6and2
    Forty6and2 Posts: 2,492 Member
    I'm a mad scientist building a time machine in my parents basement...does that count as unemployed?

    No, that counts as marriage material. If you succeed, we'd be incredibly wealthy! If you fail, we can use your lab to make meth and get rich just like Walter White.
  • Joannah700
    Joannah700 Posts: 2,665 Member
    I would date her yes. Long term relationship, no.

    This. But, you know, male.

    They would need to be epic for me to consider a long term relationship.
  • RegularOats
    RegularOats Posts: 24
    In my current situation, yes as I am a full-time university student and so is he.
    He does not have a job nor is interested in looking for one and I do not mind paying for meals and activities we share together
  • shankasaurus
    shankasaurus Posts: 116 Member
    Every situation is different. But ultimately I want to be with someone who has passion, a passion for life, for work, a passion to be the best person they can be. Just because a person has a job and can pay bills doesn't mean they have passion. And vice versa.
  • Train4Foodz
    Train4Foodz Posts: 4,298 Member
    Yes... So long as she wasn't planning on making the no job thing permanent... everyone hits hard times.. nobody should be counted out for that by anyone but I work HARD and I'd like to be with someone that has a work ethic too :)
  • Joannah700
    Joannah700 Posts: 2,665 Member
    Every situation is different. But ultimately I want to be with someone who has passion, a passion for life, for work, a passion to be the best person they can be. Just because a person has a job and can pay bills doesn't mean they have passion. And vice versa.

    Well said.
  • JT_Taylor99
    JT_Taylor99 Posts: 148
    I think if someone has a long history of gainful employment and finds themselves temporarily "between jobs," it wouldn't be an issue. If the person were chronically unemployed, not motivated to find work, and living in their mother's basement, it would be more of a problem.

    +1
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  • mrfreestyle
    mrfreestyle Posts: 1,293 Member
    It definitely depends on the circumstances. I'm currently unemployed myself but that's because I'm a full time Masters student and it would have been extremely difficult for me to juggle my very hectic studies and work. I most certainly intend to get back into the job market once my studies are completed which should be early next year or middle of next year.

    I would definitely understand if a woman wouldn't want to date me due to my current circumstances. I would personally date a woman who's unemployed provided she's in a situation to mine and intends on getting once she is past that situation.
  • PrizePopple
    PrizePopple Posts: 3,133 Member
    yes absolutely, I could have a homemade breakfast and dinner cooked for me everyday. Clothes taken to dry cleaner. cupcakes in the oven waiting for me. /dreaming

    I'd really like to say that I do this for DH, but that would mostly be a lie. He's too picky about the dry cleaner used, and I'd eat all the cupcakes.

    I'm intentionally unemployed too. Though I'm a SAHM, and I *do* cook 5 or 6 days out of the week. I mostly mastered eggs benedict just in time to start eating healthy too. :laugh:
  • SwashBlogger
    SwashBlogger Posts: 395 Member
    Never. A man out of work for any reason is almost always depressed. If he is "independently wealthy" and feels no need to work, he lacks purpose or passion.
  • Myhaloslipped
    Myhaloslipped Posts: 4,317 Member
    Never. A man out of work for any reason is almost always depressed. If he is "independently wealthy" and feels no need to work, he lacks purpose or passion.

    ^This. At least, this has been my experience. It may not be true in every case.
  • _SantaClause
    _SantaClause Posts: 335 Member
    Pretty interesting responses in the males vs the females here...
  • Kaelakcr
    Kaelakcr Posts: 505 Member
    It would have to be someone who has a legitimate reason, and who is actively looking for a good job. Like, if he's a full-time student and is slammed with classes, whatever. But I'm at an age and place in my life where I'm over the food workers and stuff. It's okay when I'm 18. But I have a good job and I hate being the main provider. I have health issues, so it puts a lot of stress on me because there is always the chance that I will miss some days and be out a couple hundred for the month. Plus, I like to do fun things, and someone making around as much as me will be able to equally contribute to that! Living a ramen-noodle life just isn't what I'm aiming for. So if he got fired from Pizza Hut and isn't aiming any higher than that, nah, I'm over that.

    If he was laid off but has skills, and is looking for a job, it would be fine for a while. I don't mind that. It's totally understandable.

    The thing that bothers me is that there is always work, but people don't think about it. They turn their nose up at it because it seems lower-class but pays really well. If someone was truly desperate, there are jobs. High-paying semi-physical labor is a great option for people who don't have a degree. But I guess some people who are unemployed and have no specialized experience or direction are too good for 60k+ a year?
  • Kaelakcr
    Kaelakcr Posts: 505 Member
    I think if someone has a long history of gainful employment and finds themselves temporarily "between jobs," it wouldn't be an issue. If the person were chronically unemployed, not motivated to find work, and living in their mother's basement, it would be more of a problem.

    +1

    This, exactly.
  • Cryptonomnomicon
    Cryptonomnomicon Posts: 848 Member
    Context relevant

    Why are they unemployed? Social anxiety, disability, mental health, physical health, genuine hard luck etc

    Sometimes highly qualified people have difficulty finding work in their chosen field because of the competitive nature of said chosen field. eg lawyers, IT, photographers etc

    It is also a consideration of if they are at least proactive with their time...in the sense are they willing to get off the couch and be productive in other facets of life such as exercise, work around the house, creative pursuits etc I also need my personal space at times so yes it would be nice if they got out of the house.

    Ultimately for me money or the social status of their income or lack of is not the issue but the person's traits, there are some incredible unemployed people that exist that are not apathetic but just don't function well in society on some levels.

    The deal breaker would be if they were inherently lazy, apathetic or lecherous.
  • HunterKiller
    HunterKiller Posts: 361 Member
    Never. A man out of work for any reason is almost always depressed. If he is "independently wealthy" and feels no need to work, he lacks purpose or passion.

    Utter bo**ocks. Guys being out of work and depressed as a reason is stupid. I have been out of work before and i was far from depressed. I guess if your brain works like that then an unemployed guy is a lucky one..
  • Cryptonomnomicon
    Cryptonomnomicon Posts: 848 Member
    Never. A man out of work for any reason is almost always depressed. If he is "independently wealthy" and feels no need to work, he lacks purpose or passion.
    What if said "independently wealthy" person proactively pursued personal passions like art, music, exercise or charity do they still lack passion or purpose?

    I don't think work is the totality of life, you can be passionate without the purpose of earning money.
  • idontcarroll
    idontcarroll Posts: 216 Member
    It always boils down to the situation...why are they unemployed? Were they fired or laid off? Are they actively looking?

    I would date someone who was unemployed if I know they are actively looking and striving to make things happen. I would not date someone who is unemployed with a goal of staying unemployed and try to “work” the system. That to me is a waste of human life.
  • Silentfool
    Silentfool Posts: 189 Member
    In addition to what was mentioned above:

    1. Is that person independently wealthy? Ok
    2. Is that person currently working towards becoming gainfully employed? Ok
    3. Is that person a leach? HELLZ NOOOOO!!!!

    wise word above
  • Kaelakcr
    Kaelakcr Posts: 505 Member
    yea, people excepted me when I didn't have a job........now I have two.

    Good for you!
  • pwittek10
    pwittek10 Posts: 723 Member
    YES!
    I would never day someone without a job/income
    Work is not just work it also is tied into self
  • SunofaBeach14
    SunofaBeach14 Posts: 4,899 Member
    Of course. I'm married to one and my career affords us that luxury.

    I'm surprised though no one has compared this question to the ones of "would you date someone overweight" and how the answers to these two questions break down along gender lines.
  • Tanie98
    Tanie98 Posts: 675 Member
    Of course. I'm married to one and my career affords us that luxury.

    I'm surprised though no one has compared this question to the ones of "would you date someone overweight" and how the answers to these two questions break down along gender lines.

    Being unemployed and overweight are different things.The answers would however be the same as some of us woudnt date someone who is overweight or obese.So the question would still get different answers
  • Monkey_Business
    Monkey_Business Posts: 1,800 Member
    Of course. I'm married to one and my career affords us that luxury.

    I'm surprised though no one has compared this question to the ones of "would you date someone overweight" and how the answers to these two questions break down along gender lines.

    ^^^^ This! My wife is unemployed and we go on dates all the time :-). She and I worked extremely hard to get at the point we are now. She no longer works and my income allows us to be very comfortable. It allows us to be able to concentrate in having quality time together. Unlike Sunofabeach, we no longer have little ones at home. We do have a grandson and my wife just returned from a weeks vacation visiting him. There is very little stress in our life. So would I date someone who is unemployed? HECK YES!
  • KatieLouWho19
    KatieLouWho19 Posts: 776 Member
    it all depends on why they're unemployed

    this..
  • sho3girl
    sho3girl Posts: 10,799 Member
    it all depends on why they're unemployed

    this..

    agreed^^^^
  • Ameenah2014
    Ameenah2014 Posts: 18
    In my opinion, it would not be a deal breaker as long as they are motivated to not stay in the rut that they are in. :-)
  • SunofaBeach14
    SunofaBeach14 Posts: 4,899 Member
    Of course. I'm married to one and my career affords us that luxury.

    I'm surprised though no one has compared this question to the ones of "would you date someone overweight" and how the answers to these two questions break down along gender lines.

    Being unemployed and overweight are different things.The answers would however be the same as some of us woudnt date someone who is overweight or obese.So the question would still get different answers

    This response reminds me that I should have added the discussion of how men and women may put difference emphasis on the importance of intelligence in mate.
  • jasonmh630
    jasonmh630 Posts: 2,850 Member
    It wouldn't be a deal breaker... What WOULD be a deal breaker is if they had no ambition to FIND work.

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