compliment or insult?

Sounds like a misguided compliment to me. People often don't realize that their approval isn't necessarily wanted. It's a safe bet that they were attempting to be encouraging, but their comment fell a little flat. No matter how they meant it, though, you're kicking *kitten* just by hitting the gym and working out. Keep that ish up!

I have a friend I met through the gym who told me after the fact that she first became drawn to me because I was the fat person who kept coming back and working hard and that wasn't the norm, but I was already skinny by then.

I'd take it as a compliment :-)

Tact is not something everyone has. Sounds like they were trying to compliment you, but people have a hard time not defining us by our physical being "blonde", "fat", "the chick with the boobs."

Rest assured I think you're that AWESOME person at the gym, nice work.

Probably meant as a compliment. But WTF, unless the person was a health professional they shouldn't be offering opinions about a somebody being overweight. There would have been better ways to handle that and still be motivating.

I think it was meant as a compliment, but it wasn't thought through, and would definitely rub me the wrong way. I would have thanked her and taken the opportunity to politely educate her on the many fat athletes out there, and how "fat" and "fit" are not mutually exclusive.

Always remember that this is YOUR GOAL...THIS IS YOUR PASSION! External comments, compliments, encouragements or even "back-handed" ones should not contribute what you feel about you and what you're doing for self. Stay focused so you can ward off distractions such as "compliment or insult?".

An attempt at a compliment. Some people, well pretty well everyone, st some time or another try to give a compliment with out thinking about how the words could be perceived.
Heck, ever tell someone their kid looks soon much like them or like their partner, it's easy to see where they get their looks, wow dad they have your eyes? Well intentioned, well meaning, we get it all the time, ours are adopted, nope,not my eyes lol. I'd say this is the same idea, well meaning with out thinking about what they are saying.

thanks for all posting this information is very important for my and help full

compliment - and hopefully a motivator -- some people don't have filters

I would be insulted and tell the person their comment came across pretty freakin' rude.
Any grown *kitten* adult should seriously know better than to say something like that. Really.

This content has been removed.

I find it incredibly patronizing, and that person probably should mind their own business. Such a "compliment" would not be well received by me if I were the recipient.
It probably wasn't said with any ill intent, but still, incredibly patronizing, just like that "hey fat person running" meme circulating around.

EDIT: Oh, I see someone already posted that meme. Awkwardddd.......

EDIT 2: wait, a complete stranger walked up to you and said this? Yeah, that's weird.

Yeah that fat person running post bugs me too. Is it okay if I walked up to my co-workers and congratulated them for not being jobless bums? Or pehaps walking up to old people and congratulating them for still breathing? I don't get why the recipient is supposed to feel proud or flattered (bad examples but the thought of doing those things actually amuses me) :laugh:

I agree with emily, I don't think the person was trying to insult. They were just being derpy.

i find that usually when people say stuff like this it's because they feel entitled enough to say their assumptions publicly without being called out on it.

it's one thing to have assumptions and prejudices of people based on what they look like, because hey let's face it we all do it, but it's totally different to feel comfortable enough to speak those out in public as if to say "hey, good for you for being the one exception to something i accept as fact based on my limited view of the world and the other people in it".

Compliment. Most gym members were more than likely overweight when they started too, so seeing someone else who may have resembled themselves, but totally kicking *kitten* and doing much better than they did when they started, was probably an attempt to give you kudos.
One thing I've tried to teach my DD is that opinions of others on how you look, dress, how you act, etc. shouldn't affect you whether good or bad. She knows that I don't value hardly anyone's opinion when they say something derogatory about me. They don't like what I do, how I look etc., then that's there issue not mine.
Don't sweat the small stuff.

A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition