Anyone over 30 with no kids and not married

Tanie98
Tanie98 Posts: 675 Member
Is anyone who is over 30 and not married and have no kids yet? I am 29 and I don't have either of those but when people ask thry always say "what are you waiting for"? I just feel like when its meant to happen it will happen and I don't really care about it.


So is it socially akward to be a certain age and not have children?
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Replies

  • TavistockToad
    TavistockToad Posts: 35,719 Member
    I'm 32 next week and don't want kids... I don't find it socially awkward...
  • aethre
    aethre Posts: 150 Member
    Just turned 30, don't want kids, not married. Except that's down to an awkward situation where I was engaged and then became not-engaged last year but we're still together. Or together again. Something like that. It's complicated.

    Anyway, for me it's pretty damn awkward. But I have friends who are not half as awkward as me about it :wink:

    Honestly, it's less awkward if you don't want kids, though. That clock, she ticks.
  • Anahita_Swims
    Anahita_Swims Posts: 4,127 Member
    28 and the above is true, also my friend is 37 and she's all the above too she's happy :)
  • PurringMyrrh
    PurringMyrrh Posts: 5,296 Member
    36, no marriage, no kids, and stoked about it...especially the no kids part.
  • ILoveGingerNut
    ILoveGingerNut Posts: 367 Member
    38, not married, no kids. happy but yes, a bit awkward when ALL of your friends have kids and you don't have much to do together...
  • LaserOctopus
    LaserOctopus Posts: 121 Member
    I'm 42, no kids, no dogs, no husband (or wife, for that matter). And quite happy that it worked out that way. I intentionally did what I could to make it work out that way...

    I'm certainly not the only one in my circle of friends. Nor among my coworkers.

    I don't find it socially awkward at all.

    Every once in a while I meet someone who completely loses their... shoes... about it, but that's their problem, not mine (and they all tend to be of the same type). I knew by about the age of 10 or so I wasn't interested in all of that. There are occasional boyfriends or arrangements with friends of the opposite sex, and that's plenty for me.
  • k8eekins
    k8eekins Posts: 2,264 Member
    Tanie98: Is anyone who is over 30 and not married and have no kids yet? I am 29 and I don't have either of those but when people ask thry always say "what are you waiting for"? I just feel like when its meant to happen it will happen and I don't really care about it. So is it socially akward to be a certain age and not have children?

    Reactively for me, an affirmative "Yes," now that I'm well over 30 the trespasses are rather grave, where some naturally assume that I'm no longer having my cycle or that I can't conceive and that I'm in dire need for matchups with good men they know who are single fathers, with the branding, "You'll make a great step mum." No woman wishes to be selected as an ideal parent primarily, for we are sensual sexual beings - first. Depending during some other parenting-dominated conversations, I'll simply grin in reaction to not-so-subtle oneliners in light banter amongst some friends (usually the older ones) to avoid more awkwardness. Children however, are a norm around me, since I'm defined by "the anomalies - no husband, no child(ren)" ~ I'm clearly not as busy and am always available in case of emergency, amongst friends who are parenting their children alone pretty much.

    In your early 30s, you really do have the time to secure a permanent relationship if one prospect leads you in that direction, as many do, only that for some of us, not one or some of those puts you back on-course; Some needed termination.

    ETA: To allow a man socially and romantically into one's life does not mean you wish to share a family with him, through the permanence of a child; Maintenance full-course protocols are necessary. When he is right, you'll know. In the meantime .... Truly grasp your absolute deal-breakers vs what works and what you'll possibly be open to for compromise.
  • SpicesOfLife
    SpicesOfLife Posts: 290 Member
    im 31, no kids, no husband. i do want those things, it just hasnt happened. i find the question "what are you waiting for?" a bit silly because you cant force it. im not gonna go marry the next guy i meet and have babies immediately just because im 31. i want it, but if its not meant to happen then i guess it wont.
  • zamphatta
    zamphatta Posts: 3 Member
    I'm 40, no kids, no marriage(s). I'm happy. I have a few friends around my age who are like this too.
  • jkal1979
    jkal1979 Posts: 1,896 Member
    I'm 35, widowed and no kids. I did want kids when I was in my early 20's and just married, but it didn't work out that way. After that ended and I started thinking about moving on I decided I didn't want kids. My parents are the only ones that have put pressure on me to have kids. I have been called selfish quite a bit though.
  • olehcat
    olehcat Posts: 92 Member
    43, no longer married, no kids, perfectly glad about it!
  • RachelInSpace
    RachelInSpace Posts: 23 Member
    I'm 32, engaged with no kids and happy this way. Neither of us want children. We dote on our dog, though. He's like our little baby. Having kids has never been important to me. My mom says I'll change my mind but she never pressures me or anything. Honestly, I don't think I'd be a very good mother... I love my nieces and nephews (I have about twelve, total) but I also love giving them back at the end of the day!
  • lynn1982
    lynn1982 Posts: 1,439 Member
    32 not married and no kids. I do want kids though. I actually find it more awkward around my friends who don't want kids since they assume that because I have none and am not in a relationship currently, that I too do not want kids. I get the "what are you waiting for" more from them than I do from friends and family who have kids/assume that I want them. Weird, I guess.

    I must add though that I have a cat whom I often refer to as my "fur baby" and post pictures of her all over instagram. Maybe that's why some people assume that I don't want kids?
  • silencioesoro
    silencioesoro Posts: 318 Member
    I get the "what are you waiting for?" from maybe 5 people in my life, the rest tell me: "good! You can wait! Life is still only just beginning."
  • singingflutelady
    singingflutelady Posts: 8,736 Member
    38 not married and no kids
  • 33 not married, no kids, no bf, and really, I'm ok.
  • Is this a pseudo marriage proposal?
  • Lol I think you missed the point.
  • I am 40 don't have kids, never been married, and don't ever want kids, I've know I haven't wanted them since I was in my 20's.

    I have no interest in getting married, I don't believe in divorce, so unless I know I can find the person who is for me, then nope
  • brentbarrie
    brentbarrie Posts: 532 Member
    You're just being smart. Both kids and a wife are expensive. You lose your freedom. You lose your friends.