Do you ever feel it is too late to be that "hot" tamale?

2

Replies

  • You sound just like my mother! Always a beautiful woman, when she put on years worth of weight she felt as though she could never achieve hotness again and just let herself go completely. Part of why it took her so many years to decide to lose the weight is BECAUSE SHE THOUGHT she could never be sexy again. In that way, her negative state of mind was preventing her from looking her best, NOT vice versa.

    She has lost 70 pounds and still has ways to go but she is looking more beautiful and slim every day. Now she is using her desire to be hot again to motivate herself to get to her goal weight instead of letting it bring her down. She always talks about how when she gets to her goal she will buy new clothes, like skirts that will show her legs, slim-fitting blouses, and attractive swimsuits. She just doesn't realize how beautiful she looks RIGHT NOW because she is so used to being overweight and seeing herself that way.

    No, you will not ever look 20 again. If you were thin your whole life, you wouldn't look 20 at 40. But you can look hot at 40, without question! Be motivated by your struggles, not beaten by them! Good luck!
  • Otterluv
    Otterluv Posts: 9,083 Member
    I wasn't very kind to myself in my 20s and 30s. I'm being kind to myself in my 40s.

    It's never too late. 40 is still young and vibrant.
    hi there...should we tell her to pick up a barbell?

    Yes, yes I think we should. Strength training really is the freaking fountain of youth.

    I don't know that I'll ever be a hot tamale. I'm in unchartered territory here, as far as my weight and body comp is concerned. Here is what I can tell you: 2.5 years ago this was me,

    LB4hKSI.jpg


    Here I am now:

    YcIkf5Y.jpg

    QKnDzZ7.jpg

    I obviously still have weight to lose. And I have some loose skin issues. But, because I strength train, I have shapely shoulders (yay traps!), nice calves, and my *kitten* is round and lifted. I look better than I thought I would at this weight, and I am pleased with where it's headed as the fat goes away.

    Whether I'll ever be hot, I have no idea. But, I'm hoping to be the best me that I can be. Whatever happens, I enjoy life much more now, and that's a MAJOR win.
  • hzliiz
    hzliiz Posts: 166 Member
    I was a red hot mess mentally and emotionally in my 20's and well into my 30's, to be perfectly honest. I'm 43 and finally, have figured out how to be happy. So it actually seems like the most perfect of times in my life to be at my hottest :wink:

    No, it's not too late. Be your best you.
  • roanokejoe49
    roanokejoe49 Posts: 820 Member
    Me at 40

    96ca0a41b40ac0b99abe4aafbc77f35ad44e.jpg

    Me at 42
    96caa443e00be9e1206d0ac9c35b35b9e190.jpg

    Me at almost 43
    96ca1643bec8a995d991adf3d1c95ababc07.jpg
    96cab6a6abc7b5cac17fcbbfc39f239f4a74.jpg

    Wow. Totally hot!
  • Otterluv
    Otterluv Posts: 9,083 Member
    Me at 40

    96ca0a41b40ac0b99abe4aafbc77f35ad44e.jpg

    Me at 42
    96caa443e00be9e1206d0ac9c35b35b9e190.jpg

    Me at almost 43
    96ca1643bec8a995d991adf3d1c95ababc07.jpg
    96cab6a6abc7b5cac17fcbbfc39f239f4a74.jpg

    :heart: :heart: :heart:
  • Cranquistador
    Cranquistador Posts: 39,744 Member
    Yay Angie!

    OP if you are interested...


    Bench press
    3n7nb_zps5d4df606.gif

    Squat:
    5vftc_zpsf8339ed7.gif

    And my favorite tied with bench...The Deadlift.
    9gcrq_zps59ce9c27.gif
  • Milliepet
    Milliepet Posts: 40 Member
    40 Forty 40 , I am now 72 & am determined I will do everything to stay out of a wheelchair, use a walker & become
    a 'cute' little old lady!! I am very active, down 14# since beginning MFP. Recently I was putting my 'public' face on
    in the bathroom & saw my husband looking at me in the mirror. I asked if he needed something, he replied 'just looking
    & wow, you are looking hot! During one of our more intimate times he ran his hand down my thigh & said 'you really are
    slimming down, you're looking so good.'
    So now my dear, if I can do it at 72 you can surely do it at 40.
    It's up to you, how much do you want to be a 'hot tamale'? it takes dedication & resisting temptation. You Can Do It!!
  • I wasn't very kind to myself in my 20s and 30s. I'm being kind to myself in my 40s.

    It's never too late. 40 is still young and vibrant.
    hi there...should we tell her to pick up a barbell?

    Yes, yes I think we should. Strength training really is the freaking fountain of youth.

    I don't know that I'll ever be a hot tamale. I'm in unchartered territory here, as far as my weight and body comp is concerned. Here is what I can tell you: 2.5 years ago this was me,

    LB4hKSI.jpg


    Here I am now:

    YcIkf5Y.jpg

    QKnDzZ7.jpg

    I obviously still have weight to lose. And I have some loose skin issues. But, because I strength train, I have shapely shoulders (yay traps!), nice calves, and my *kitten* is round and lifted. I look better than I thought I would at this weight, and I am pleased with where it's headed as the fat goes away.

    Whether I'll ever be hot, I have no idea. But, I'm hoping to be the best me that I can be. Whatever happens, I enjoy life much more now, and that's a MAJOR win.




    ^hot tamale! Right there.
  • 00Allie00
    00Allie00 Posts: 243 Member
    Heck no. It's a state of mind, and an attitude. I'm 43, and I feel quite young still.

    The key is to keep imporoving, always strive to be a healthier version of yourself, and keep your chin up and your attitude strong.

    And look to those awesome women who have posted above who exude beauty and confidence. :heart:
  • ucabucca
    ucabucca Posts: 606 Member
    I am 53 and although loosing was not an issue for me it was gaining I got very sick and was very under weight It can be done. I am healthy and strong again and in the middle of normal weight range. I lift more than many guys with legs and holding my own on upper body and running almost 8 miles in an hr. I was allowed to start working with a trainer in Jan 2013 and have an awesome support network and have never lost any of their support by being honest with self and those around me. You have to believe and fight you may not see the results clearly at first but they will come. I am so happy and once again skiing competitively and winning beating many half my age It is awesome!
  • EvgeniZyntx
    EvgeniZyntx Posts: 24,208 Member
    You will not be 20 again but certainly can be strong, adventurous, positive, outgoing, fit, active and hot.

    I'm 48 and I know will never be as fast or strong or thin or muscular as some potential might have been at 25 but the sum parts of my experience and self don't let me mope about that might have been - I'm putting the good fight for today and tomorrow.

    Focusing on might have beens is drinking the poison of regret. Why bother?

    Today, I'm just making sure that tomorrow - I'll regret today less.
  • Mantislady
    Mantislady Posts: 23 Member
    I have to reply to everyone, so no one feels left out :) Yes, I am a nut. And probably by the time I go through all the posts and post this, there will be a whole slew of new posts!

    Roanokejoe: I know you mean well, and agree, bad thoughts need to be banished.

    Colleenzlife: Thank you girl, I shall hang in there!

    Randomtai: That is so awesome you feel hotter than in your 20s, means there is hope. In my 20s, well, I can't remember when I felt any different!

    Pita: I I need to absorb some of your zest. I used to have it, but it seems to gone on a walkabout.

    Sexzestef: I didn't even think about it how much is mental. I think I just always accepted the status quo, per se.

    dwalt: I dont know that I can get rid of the scale for 6 weeks, but maybe I will try it for 2 weeks and see what happens.

    cynthiamamm: I am so glad you got my post, or at least what i was trying to convey. Like you, I want to get get back into well, I don't know, as I can't remember when I was ever thin except as a kid. so I guess i wanna break my own record?

    Cranquistor: Wow, thank you for showing me those photos. You really inspire me! Part 2 post: Hmmm I am going to have find a gym. Wonder if I can do anything similar at home all those workout machines??

    Whitehorse: Thank you for your post. Really made me take a breath. Sadly, I live out in the middle of nowhere and work through the home (no groups, nothing you would find in a city). Also because of this, I rarely go out. I have no social friends, my family lives 6 hours away (they are all gorgeous and dont need to work out anyway). My daily chats are to the doggie ;)

    Oxmarq: Funny about the guy knocking on my door lol :) (literally made me laugh)!

    fatcity: Nope, no plans!

    Adc7225: You are so right how we woman get t his way about a number. And yeah though I would love to lok great in the nude, clothed would suffice ;) How alike we are, my 30s were hard too, raising a teen :) Who now, though has blossomed into a wonderful college student and soon to be an English Professor.

    Galatea: You are so right. I need to be kind to myself. Sometimes I wonder if I failed before because I feel perhaps I do not deserve this? I don't know.

    Raspenberry: yeah sometimes I dunno what is up with me (hah);.

    Suga: Thank you :) I am starting to feel it... somehow, i really am.

    Seltzermint: Hehe you bring back memories :) I was in the 6th grade and ended up being runner-up and felt so SORRY for the boy who won as he had to read and memorize all those books of words!!

    Sunofbeach: I saw ure post, but then it disappeared, I think you deleted it?

    BinaryPular: Thank you!

    Galatea: You know, i read about that, I have a set. But they are 3, 5, and 7lbs. Are those too light?

    Ainevethe: You are brave, I have not been to a doctor in 10 years. I am too scared to go since they make you get on the scale! I am so glad you know what I mean, sexy isn't sexy unless you feel it. i was winded running up the stairs, I know I need to change things. Love that line, unleash the sexy, one day at a time.

    Frayst: Your momma sounds like me. Thank you for your awesome words... and by the way- you look incredible! Stay healthy!

    Otterluv: I am now seeing this speak of strength training so many times on this thread now. WOW your before and after... incredible! I hope I have as much success as you!! Definitely going to have to lok into this strength training.

    Hzliiz: You make smile :) I think I have always been a hot mess, maybe born that and still am. Maybe now is the time I will figure it all out, like you.

    Milliepet: Awww how sweet your husband said that to you :) Not sure if that would make me blush or make me well, um :)
    Wow, you are so inspiring, at 72! I want to adopt you :)

    Alliepointtwo: You are so right (as was roanoakejoe in his roundabout way), it is all a matter of mind. And yes, I am so inspired by all those who have posted. Sometimes I just dont know about myself- why I think the way I do.

    Ucabucca- you are so right, i need to believe. And again, this weight training and strength training is coming up.. I really need to start this it seems.

    EDIT: All those who have said I am welcome to add them, I am :) And thank you.
  • Dragn77
    Dragn77 Posts: 810 Member
    Lemme see...

    Salma Hayak
    Vanessa Williams
    Janet Jackson
    Halle Berry
    Jennifer Lopez
    Cameron Diaz
    Sofía Vergara...OMG Sofia Vergara...not just her looks, her whole attitude is so hot it sizzles!!! Shes gonna be a hot tamale even when shes 90 LoL yes, Im a fan :)

    ...I'd name off women I know personally, but you woudln't have a clue who I'm talking about LoL!

    But suffice it to say, I double dare ya to tell any of those women its too late for them to be hot! Seriously, I turn 40 in 2 years, and so not going to throw in the towel anytime soon! Like others said, its all a state of mind and putting into action what you want to achieve. And it is so not even about the weight, its about you...if you adjust how you feel about yourself, that will reflect out to the world.

    Which reminds me of another favorite of mine..Queen Latifah... Ive seen her in person (we happened to be going to see the same movie and she was super casual in sweats and no makeup) and she looks *exactly* the same in person as she does in pictures...absolutely beautiful and confident. And that right there is I think the key...
  • dopeysmelly
    dopeysmelly Posts: 1,390 Member
    I felt like this after having my small army of kids. Once I decided what I wanted to do and stuck with it, I no longer feel like that. Hell I feel hotter now than in my 20's.

    Totally this. And I've not even started working out yet..
  • NoMoreBlameGame
    NoMoreBlameGame Posts: 236 Member
    So, I hit 40 last year, and I slumped and just didn't really have any motivation (this was soon after I signed up here). I did good for maybe a few weeks, all knowing I was to be hitting 40.

    Sadly, one of my motivations is to look awesome. I want to feel sexy! But after my birthday, this last year I felt discouraged and really did not put any effort into dieting, feeling like (for me) this age is the last time I will be able to look good, and with so much weight to lose (150 lbs) I will never get there.

    I have been doing well and about 2 weeks ago, not sure what happened but I decided to give it a try again. So here I be, with too long of a journey to think about.. Wondering will i ever be able to wear shorts? Will I ever look good?

    Anyone ever feel that way? I need to figure out how to battle this so I don't stop working at this.

    I have felt this way. I'll be 38 this year, part of my goal (apart from 150 more pounds to lose) is to enter my 40s with a bang.

    I doubt *very* highly I will ever be a 'hot tamale'. I mean...once I reach my goal weight, it will be a 200 lb loss. I'm certain there will be lots of excess leftovers saggin' here and there.

    I will be satisfied with being a lukewarm tamale, lol!

    So to answer your title question, "Do you ever feel it is too late..." Yes, I have felt that way...but I'm working on ignoring that feeling and pushing forward anyway.

    Keep on keeping on, you CAN do this...and you will; believe in yourself. :smile:
  • Mantislady
    Mantislady Posts: 23 Member
    EvgeniZyntx: You say it spot on- I am drinking the poisons of regret. I need to get rid of the what have beens... Not sure why I am so focused? I thought it was you dont miss what you never had. I LOVE your last line, that you are making sure tomorrow you regret today less. I need to start thinking that way.

    Dragn77: :) You know, even at 40, I am thinking about ripping out photos of stars in magazines to show myself I can still look awesome at any age.

    Dopey: Right on :)

    Nomoreblame: By the way, love the username ;) I shall too be happy with a lukewarm tamale. I think it is because in my family, and from what I have seen, people seem to savor the beauty, the trim, the blah blah blah. I think it has just got so ingrained to into me that it is only perfection or nothing!
  • CariJean64
    CariJean64 Posts: 297 Member
    You sound just like my mother! Always a beautiful woman, when she put on years worth of weight she felt as though she could never achieve hotness again and just let herself go completely. Part of why it took her so many years to decide to lose the weight is BECAUSE SHE THOUGHT she could never be sexy again. In that way, her negative state of mind was preventing her from looking her best, NOT vice versa.

    She has lost 70 pounds and still has ways to go but she is looking more beautiful and slim every day. Now she is using her desire to be hot again to motivate herself to get to her goal weight instead of letting it bring her down. She always talks about how when she gets to her goal she will buy new clothes, like skirts that will show her legs, slim-fitting blouses, and attractive swimsuits. She just doesn't realize how beautiful she looks RIGHT NOW because she is so used to being overweight and seeing herself that way.

    No, you will not ever look 20 again. If you were thin your whole life, you wouldn't look 20 at 40. But you can look hot at 40, without question! Be motivated by your struggles, not beaten by them! Good luck!

    Wow. I could be your mother! LOL

    OP, I'm 50 and started my journey with 180 to lose. Will I ever have a 20 year old body again? No. But I'm going to do my best with what I have, and I am ENORMOUSLY happy I made the choice to change.
  • rosebette
    rosebette Posts: 1,659 Member
    I just had to send the link to this thread. This gal is 51.

    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1426564-older-women-success-stories-please

    I'm 55 myself, and while not a "hot tamale," and I couldn't hope to look like the gal on this thread, I did just sign up for a serious weight lifting class (bench presses and dead lifts), so it's never too late to try something new or change things up a bit. On my daughter's advice, I cleaned out my closet a couple of years ago -- no mom jeans or pleated pants.
  • As cliche as it is? One day at a time. This is my 3rd time back on MFP. I told myself to take a year & see what happens. I'm pretty damn proud (and shocked if I were honest about it) of how far I've come in the 429 days I've tracked solid now. You'll have slips, just don't throw away all the progress you do make. And something I've gained as I've lost & can be pretty certain you will too? CONFIDENCE! Will I ever have a tight perfect body? No, and I'm ok with that. Things I could recommend instead of a gym? Youtube workout videos, DVD's or go for a walk with your furry friend. The main thing is just to move and you'll feel better when you do. You'll have aches & pains in the beginning but keep at it. After a time you'll feel energized & looking forward to that time. Good luck, you've found a great place to surround yourself with support.
  • caterpillardreams
    caterpillardreams Posts: 476 Member
    Thank you for the feedback, roanokejoe. I agree with you about getting negative thoughts out of my mind. I was, however, being serious in my post, as silly as it may have sounded.

    I believe you were serious. I also believe your attitude needs adjusting. How do I know? Because you admittedly keep starting and falling back. This is an attitude problem. A desire problem. Look at your issue squarely. You have over 100 lbs to lose, right? OK, so that's a year's worth of work. A year's work and you'll be healthy, fit, and sexy for the next 40 years! Isn't that a fair trade?

    So, instead of whining about how daunting the journey is, just...wait for it...ENJOY THE JOURNEY. Small goals. 2 lbs a week. Body fat percentage dropping. Relax. Sexy will come, but you have to commit to wanting it.

    I love your response. One year of work and 40 years of being sexy. what an amazing way to think.
  • caterpillardreams
    caterpillardreams Posts: 476 Member
    Me at 40

    96ca0a41b40ac0b99abe4aafbc77f35ad44e.jpg

    Me at 42
    96caa443e00be9e1206d0ac9c35b35b9e190.jpg

    Me at almost 43
    96ca1643bec8a995d991adf3d1c95ababc07.jpg
    96cab6a6abc7b5cac17fcbbfc39f239f4a74.jpg

    Wow, You look amazing.
  • BinaryPulsar
    BinaryPulsar Posts: 8,927 Member
    Lots of inspiration in this thread! And beautiful photos!

    Op, It's great the way you are taking in all this encouragement and advice!

    I also agree with weight training!
  • salembambi
    salembambi Posts: 5,585 Member
    i am 26 and i know i will never be a "hot" tamale considering ive lost over 150 pounds and cant afford to get medical procedures to help the loose skin
  • GertrudeHorse
    GertrudeHorse Posts: 646 Member
    i am 26 and i know i will never be a "hot" tamale considering ive lost over 150 pounds and cant afford to get medical procedures to help the loose skin

    Um, you're already the hottest babe I know on the internet. Loose skin and all.
  • Mantislady
    Mantislady Posts: 23 Member
    Salembambi: Good for you at your age for losing it. I WISH I did when I was at your age. I can only hope I didnt shave off too many years waiting this long to lose :( I will be with ya, loose skin and all.
  • RUNNING_AMOK_1958
    RUNNING_AMOK_1958 Posts: 268 Member
    Hell no! I'll be 56 next week and feel more hot than I've ever been before in my life!
  • PrizePopple
    PrizePopple Posts: 3,133 Member
    I'm 33 and never really felt hot. Of course I look back to being 20 or so and I'm like "Damn, I was hot. Why did I waste that time of my life on the guys I dated and people I hung out with?!?!" At this point I'll take being comfortable with myself, and being attractive *winkwinknudgenudge* to DH again (I'm not saying he's not attracted, but I can't say I would blame him if he's not.)
  • heatherloveslifting
    heatherloveslifting Posts: 1,428 Member
    No. I truly feel that I have never, ever been as hot as I am in my 40s. :drinker:
  • Mantislady
    Mantislady Posts: 23 Member
    Prizepopple: Neither have I, ever. I am hoping to, one day. I am glad im not alone in feeling this way. I felt it all through my 20s, 30s and now sadly, maybe my 40s.
  • amoreamore
    amoreamore Posts: 21 Member
    Next year you'll be 41, then 42, then 43, then 44, then 45... You'll never stop aging. But you don't wanna look back at 50 and think "damn I wish I could have been a hot tamale at 40!" Doesn't matter how much time has passed. All that matters is that you stop wasting time and start today.

    Today you wish you'd started a year ago. If you don't start today, a year from now you'll be wishing you had!