Why did I try lifting...
Replies
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And generalized weakness and, I'm guessing, lethargy. And yes, likely vitamin D and calcium deficiency as well as low or imbalanced electrolytes.
All medical conditions.
I'm curious about bone density. At 19...
This makes me sad.
Please see a doctor.
Doctors have told me about all of these things at one point or another in my life. I never took care of them, thinking they weren't that important. What am I supposed to do, though? Most of them never stressed any specific changes, they just told me 'you have this'. They also told me I was fat and needed to lose weight, and I guess that's the only message I took away.
You need more protein. You need a high potency multivitamin with iron. You need to get 20-30 minutes of sun exposure per day. You need to drink liquids. If you can't drink water, drink something that doesn't make you feel gross. Drink small sips throughout the day for a week and each week, increase the amount you drink each time. Eat juicy fruits and veggies for additional hydration (oranges, watermelon, pineapple, mango, etc.). You need to build some muscle. You can do that by just using your body weight. You don't have to lift weights right now if you're not ready. But you can do squats, wall pushups, burpees, lunges, stair climbing, and general calisthenics to start.
Ask your doctor for a referral to a nutritionist.0 -
And generalized weakness and, I'm guessing, lethargy. And yes, likely vitamin D and calcium deficiency as well as low or imbalanced electrolytes.
All medical conditions.
I'm curious about bone density. At 19...
This makes me sad.
Please see a doctor.
Doctors have told me about all of these things at one point or another in my life. I never took care of them, thinking they weren't that important. What am I supposed to do, though? Most of them never stressed any specific changes, they just told me 'you have this'. They also told me I was fat and needed to lose weight, and I guess that's the only message I took away.
You need a doctor with nutritional training or a referral to a specialist. Many doctors can identify issues, but a plan of action is usually better suited to a specialist than a generalist.0 -
And generalized weakness and, I'm guessing, lethargy. And yes, likely vitamin D and calcium deficiency as well as low or imbalanced electrolytes.
All medical conditions.
I'm curious about bone density. At 19...
This makes me sad.
Please see a doctor.
Doctors have told me about all of these things at one point or another in my life. I never took care of them, thinking they weren't that important. What am I supposed to do, though? Most of them never stressed any specific changes, they just told me 'you have this'. They also told me I was fat and needed to lose weight, and I guess that's the only message I took away.
You need a doctor with nutritional training or a referral to a specialist. Many doctors can identify issues, but a plan of action is usually better suited to a specialist than a generalist.
There is a campus nutritionist. I visited her once last year and she wasn't very helpful. Maybe I should try again.0 -
On the off chance that this is real as you say it is, please, please go see a medical professional.
Water makes you feel bloated and gross/sick to your stomach (this, this... I have no idea, but its scary)
You avoid activity rather than drink water
You've passed out due to dehydration multiple times because of this and it still does not signal you to drink more water - in fact you alter your life in order to avoid drinking water and easily solving this problem
Its apparently enough of a problem that your boyfriend actually monitored you while drinking water
You are so weak that you cannot lift even a text book and - again -altered your life in order to accommodate this.
You eat very few vegetables and meat, other than seafood, is also off limits, but you don't eat fish that often either, so its mostly vegetarian - what's left to be on the menu? <- this, really you could be vitamin deficient, low iron etc if your diet is not rounded out (also might account for the weakness you are experiencing)
Whatever is going on with you has affected a serious portion of your life. (Who doesn't go outside/stops doing things they enjoy without a serious medical condition?)
All this puts together a very frightening picture. I don't know whats going on in your life OP, but to an outsider (who is now rather concerned after reading all your forum posts) it sounds as if there are some serious psychological or medical issues going on here. So I urge you to go explore the reasons why this is going on with you. Leave no stone unturned mentally or physically.
Other than the dehydration, low blood pressure, and a couple bouts of low iron (my family is vegetarian but I recently switched because there was nothing to eat in my dining hall) I don't have any medical condition. I guess I've just looked at convenience rather than fixing things. I didn't see any of these things to be problems. When I couldn't lift my books I thought 'oh, hey, there's an alternative--ebooks.' When I couldn't go out without fainting in the heat I thought 'oh, hey, there's an alternative--I never really liked spending time outside anyway.' Nobody ever really told me these choices were wrong. Apparently I've been doing stuff all wrong here...
Its not normal or healthy. The fact that you don't see these things as problems is a big marker for something being wrong. I would be worried for myself if these things were happening to me. These are major things in your life that you are changing.
I did not insinuate that you were doing things wrong. I'm telling you that these things should be concerning you from a health standpoint if nothing else. That you should be paying attention to these things instead of ignoring them. That you should be wanting to find out the cause of these things instead of just sweeping them under the bus and determining to live your life differently because its too much trouble to fix them.
I'm not one to tell someone how to live their life, but these are abnormal and concerning behaviors which I urge you to see a specialist about immediately before you do irreparable harm to yourself.0 -
Your post on 8/22 says you are a student/library worker... but you now you say you don't pick up your own textbook because it is too heavy. How do you work in a library? Do you work in a library and you are able to not pick up books while you work in the library? I am baffled. Do you go get someone else to help pick up the books when you work in the library?
You are on campus where you say that they have more than one gym. One gym is all women and another is co-ed. The thought of working out co-ed makes you physically ill. Why?
Are there trainers at either gym? Will trainers consult with you? Are they able to help you establish goals for working out and look at your form?
Are you pulling our chains? Are you able to get checked out?
I've had a number of medical conditions... anemic for several years until the doctors finally wanted to perform an emergency blood transfusion and hysterectomy. I completed college, though, and was able to carry my books and I even worked out. But I abused thermogenics and diet pills to mask the symptoms of the anemia.
Are you using drugs? Have you used drugs?
Please go get checked out, and ask around on campus if there is a nutritionist there. Then go to the gym and talk to someone to see if there is a trainer in either of the gyms that you can consult with. Also, please see if there is someone you can talk to in mental health for an assessment there too.0 -
Was she not very helpful or did you not take anything she said seriously? If it's the former, then you should see someone else. If it's the latter, listen to what she's telling you. You're going to have to make changes. Some of them will be uncomfortable. You'll have to deal with it. You may consider seeing a psychologist/counselor as well.0
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Your post on 8/22 says you are a student/library worker... but you now you say you don't pick up your own textbook because it is too heavy. How do you work in a library? Do you work in a library and you are able to not pick up books while you work in the library? I am baffled. Do you go get someone else to help pick up the books when you work in the library?
You are on campus where you say that they have more than one gym. One gym is all women and another is co-ed. The thought of working out co-ed makes you physically ill. Why?
Are there trainers at either gym? Will trainers consult with you? Are they able to help you establish goals for working out and look at your form?
Are you pulling our chains? Are you able to get checked out?
I've had a number of medical conditions... anemic for several years until the doctors finally wanted to perform an emergency blood transfusion and hysterectomy. I completed college, though, and was able to carry my books and I even worked out. But I abused thermogenics and diet pills to mask the symptoms of the anemia.
Are you using drugs? Have you used drugs?
Please go get checked out, and ask around on campus if there is a nutritionist there. Then go to the gym and talk to someone to see if there is a trainer in either of the gyms that you can consult with. Also, please see if there is someone you can talk to in mental health for an assessment there too.
The books at the library aren't that heavy, and there are always carts. I can lift a textbook for a short amount of time, but I can't really carry them across campus, hence the ebooks.
Men make me very nervous in general, especially large scary-looking men. It sounds kind of silly, but I go to school at one of the most athletic campuses in the country. If you aren't tiny and fit, you're setting yourself up for ridicule at the co-ed gym.
The trainers are for the varsity athletes. I'm not going to embarrass myself.
I'm not pulling anyone's chains, but I guess I was really blind to all my issues before. I can visit a nutritionist here on campus, hopefully she'll be able to help.
I have never used any recreational or prescription drugs, other than birth control (been on that for 6 years).
I have seen counselors for mental health before, and I'm in a much better place than I used to be. I'm still a work in progress, but I'm getting better.0 -
Men make me very nervous in general, especially large scary-looking men. It sounds kind of silly, but I go to school at one of the most athletic campuses in the country. If you aren't tiny and fit, you're setting yourself up for ridicule at the co-ed gym.
What???0 -
scary looking men? I don't usually encounter them in the gym.....0
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Men make me very nervous in general, especially large scary-looking men. It sounds kind of silly, but I go to school at one of the most athletic campuses in the country. If you aren't tiny and fit, you're setting yourself up for ridicule at the co-ed gym.
how- do you function in life. AT ALL.0 -
Perhaps you are bothered too much about what other people think?
Go and see the nutritionist and whilst you are there or with the Dr, then ask if they refer to anyone who helps with fitness.
Also ask at the gym whether any of the trainers can help you with setting up a weights program. Maube start off with the machines first. Start off on weights equivalent to one library book and build up until it becomes challenging. Keep at it every week and you will make progress. Everyone starts somewhere and you should be doing this for yourself and not to impress some guy who really wont be bothered.
Besides having a better shape, then you should also consider the important health aspects later on in life that being strong could help you avoid. It seems to be more about self confidence and self esteem rather than any practical limitations which you seem to think are there. Focus on what is good for you becayse that should be worth the effort.0 -
Your post on 8/22 says you are a student/library worker... but you now you say you don't pick up your own textbook because it is too heavy. How do you work in a library? Do you work in a library and you are able to not pick up books while you work in the library? I am baffled. Do you go get someone else to help pick up the books when you work in the library?
You are on campus where you say that they have more than one gym. One gym is all women and another is co-ed. The thought of working out co-ed makes you physically ill. Why?
Are there trainers at either gym? Will trainers consult with you? Are they able to help you establish goals for working out and look at your form?
Are you pulling our chains? Are you able to get checked out?
I've had a number of medical conditions... anemic for several years until the doctors finally wanted to perform an emergency blood transfusion and hysterectomy. I completed college, though, and was able to carry my books and I even worked out. But I abused thermogenics and diet pills to mask the symptoms of the anemia.
Are you using drugs? Have you used drugs?
Please go get checked out, and ask around on campus if there is a nutritionist there. Then go to the gym and talk to someone to see if there is a trainer in either of the gyms that you can consult with. Also, please see if there is someone you can talk to in mental health for an assessment there too.
The books at the library aren't that heavy, and there are always carts. I can lift a textbook for a short amount of time, but I can't really carry them across campus, hence the ebooks.
Men make me very nervous in general, especially large scary-looking men. It sounds kind of silly, but I go to school at one of the most athletic campuses in the country. If you aren't tiny and fit, you're setting yourself up for ridicule at the co-ed gym.
The trainers are for the varsity athletes. I'm not going to embarrass myself.
I'm not pulling anyone's chains, but I guess I was really blind to all my issues before. I can visit a nutritionist here on campus, hopefully she'll be able to help.
I have never used any recreational or prescription drugs, other than birth control (been on that for 6 years).
I have seen counselors for mental health before, and I'm in a much better place than I used to be. I'm still a work in progress, but I'm getting better.
Seriously. Are you being legit?
ETA - also, yeay for sexism! Big scurrrry menz!0 -
I certainly don't mean to be sexist, but shouldn't people work out in conditions that make them feel comfortable? Going to the co-ed gym would certainly not make me feel comfortable. I went once to use a stationary bike and left due to pure nerves. I'm much more comfortable in the exercise room in my dorm, where there's maybe one or two other girls.0
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Trololololololololol0
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I certainly don't mean to be sexist, but shouldn't people work out in conditions that make them feel comfortable? Going to the co-ed gym would certainly not make me feel comfortable. I went once to use a stationary bike and left due to pure nerves. I'm much more comfortable in the exercise room in my dorm, where there's maybe one or two other girls.
What if those two girls talk more crap about you then the co-ed gym? You got a lot of unresolved issues I think.0 -
Per OP's profile: "I'm too young to give up on a lifestyle change, but too old to blame other people."
This is what you need to work on before giving lifting a try. Good luck.0 -
Men make me very nervous in general, especially large scary-looking men. It sounds kind of silly, but I go to school at one of the most athletic campuses in the country. If you aren't tiny and fit, you're setting yourself up for ridicule at the co-ed gym.
The trainers are for the varsity athletes. I'm not going to embarrass myself.
This sounds like social anxiety. I have it (though not this bad) and I've known several people with it (you sound just like them). You may want to talk to a counsler about it. I know it sucks to be thrown out of your comfort zone and it's even worse if other people are around but you have to work through it.
I used to sit at my desk starving because I didn't want to go to the break room while there were people in there to heat up my lunch. So I would sit for 2 hours while everyone else finished their lunch shifts so I could go eat. It sounds rediculous, I know but it seemed better than having to go in there while there were 10 or so people in there.
Well one day I got tired of it and I marched in there, as hard as is was, to get my lunch out of the fridge and heat it up. You know what happened? Nothing. No one even noticed me in there. I keep pushing myself to do this every day even though I don't want to.
I do find that it's easier to do things around other people if I'm with someone I know. Do you have a friend that you could go to the co-ed gym with? The two of you can work together and it's a lot easier.
If you truely do have social anxiety, you need to find a way past it or you will end up a shut in. Go see a doctor and explain what you're feeling so you can get help.0 -
You have gotten some fantastic advice and of course some smart *kitten* comments (goes with any forum ). But all the advice in the world won't help you unless you really want to change. It all about baby steps. If the co-ed gym intimidates you work out at the women's gym or start like you did.... in the dorm. If 8's are too heavy start with 2.5 or 5 pounds.
There is a gal, at the gym I work out in, that started with 2.5 pound weights and a 10 second plank. After a couple of months her entire being has transformed. She lifts quite a bit heavier and is up to a 2 minute plank. She has gotten over the fear of working out with other folks (both men and women) and has a can-do attitude in every exercise she does.
What I am saying is: Give it a true effort for a couple of months. If you don't see and feel a dramatic difference well you can go back to struggling with text books. But 99.9% of us here will say every bit of pain and struggle was worth it for the end results. Anybody that gives you crap for being in a gym has self confidence issues and isn't worth a second of your thoughts.0 -
Men make me very nervous in general, especially large scary-looking men. It sounds kind of silly, but I go to school at one of the most athletic campuses in the country. If you aren't tiny and fit, you're setting yourself up for ridicule at the co-ed gym.
The trainers are for the varsity athletes. I'm not going to embarrass myself.
This sounds like social anxiety. I have it (though not this bad) and I've known several people with it (you sound just like them). You may want to talk to a counsler about it. I know it sucks to be thrown out of your comfort zone and it's even worse if other people are around but you have to work through it.
I used to sit at my desk starving because I didn't want to go to the break room while there were people in there to heat up my lunch. So I would sit for 2 hours while everyone else finished their lunch shifts so I could go eat. It sounds rediculous, I know but it seemed better than having to go in there while there were 10 or so people in there.
Well one day I got tired of it and I marched in there, as hard as is was, to get my lunch out of the fridge and heat it up. You know what happened? Nothing. No one even noticed me in there. I keep pushing myself to do this every day even though I don't want to.
I do find that it's easier to do things around other people if I'm with someone I know. Do you have a friend that you could go to the co-ed gym with? The two of you can work together and it's a lot easier.
If you truely do have social anxiety, you need to find a way past it or you will end up a shut in. Go see a doctor and explain what you're feeling so you can get help.
I do have social anxiety, and I have worked past it in almost every respect...except fitness/nutrition. I used to never be able to go to office hours with professors or ask questions in class, or ask friends to socialize. I've gotten past all those. Working out is the only thing still in my way.
The time I went to the co-ed gym, I brought my boyfriend, who isn't fit either. It turned out to be extremely embarrassing.0 -
Men make me very nervous in general, especially large scary-looking men. It sounds kind of silly, but I go to school at one of the most athletic campuses in the country. If you aren't tiny and fit, you're setting yourself up for ridicule at the co-ed gym.
The trainers are for the varsity athletes. I'm not going to embarrass myself.
This sounds like social anxiety. I have it (though not this bad) and I've known several people with it (you sound just like them). You may want to talk to a counsler about it. I know it sucks to be thrown out of your comfort zone and it's even worse if other people are around but you have to work through it.
I used to sit at my desk starving because I didn't want to go to the break room while there were people in there to heat up my lunch. So I would sit for 2 hours while everyone else finished their lunch shifts so I could go eat. It sounds rediculous, I know but it seemed better than having to go in there while there were 10 or so people in there.
Well one day I got tired of it and I marched in there, as hard as is was, to get my lunch out of the fridge and heat it up. You know what happened? Nothing. No one even noticed me in there. I keep pushing myself to do this every day even though I don't want to.
I do find that it's easier to do things around other people if I'm with someone I know. Do you have a friend that you could go to the co-ed gym with? The two of you can work together and it's a lot easier.
If you truely do have social anxiety, you need to find a way past it or you will end up a shut in. Go see a doctor and explain what you're feeling so you can get help.
I do have social anxiety, and I have worked past it in almost every respect...except fitness/nutrition. I used to never be able to go to office hours with professors or ask questions in class, or ask friends to socialize. I've gotten past all those. Working out is the only thing still in my way.
The time I went to the co-ed gym, I brought my boyfriend, who isn't fit either. It turned out to be extremely embarrassing.
Elaborate on bold?0 -
i LOVE me some lifting. Start small- as small as necessary! You don't need to start out using heavy weights. Build your way up. You're also not alone in terms of being intimidated by the dudes in the weights section. Many people (men and women) are. They're more concerned with checking themselves out so just focus on you!0
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Men make me very nervous in general, especially large scary-looking men. It sounds kind of silly, but I go to school at one of the most athletic campuses in the country. If you aren't tiny and fit, you're setting yourself up for ridicule at the co-ed gym.
The trainers are for the varsity athletes. I'm not going to embarrass myself.
This sounds like social anxiety. I have it (though not this bad) and I've known several people with it (you sound just like them). You may want to talk to a counsler about it. I know it sucks to be thrown out of your comfort zone and it's even worse if other people are around but you have to work through it.
I used to sit at my desk starving because I didn't want to go to the break room while there were people in there to heat up my lunch. So I would sit for 2 hours while everyone else finished their lunch shifts so I could go eat. It sounds rediculous, I know but it seemed better than having to go in there while there were 10 or so people in there.
Well one day I got tired of it and I marched in there, as hard as is was, to get my lunch out of the fridge and heat it up. You know what happened? Nothing. No one even noticed me in there. I keep pushing myself to do this every day even though I don't want to.
I do find that it's easier to do things around other people if I'm with someone I know. Do you have a friend that you could go to the co-ed gym with? The two of you can work together and it's a lot easier.
If you truely do have social anxiety, you need to find a way past it or you will end up a shut in. Go see a doctor and explain what you're feeling so you can get help.
I do have social anxiety, and I have worked past it in almost every respect...except fitness/nutrition. I used to never be able to go to office hours with professors or ask questions in class, or ask friends to socialize. I've gotten past all those. Working out is the only thing still in my way.
The time I went to the co-ed gym, I brought my boyfriend, who isn't fit either. It turned out to be extremely embarrassing.
Elaborate on bold?
I was so unfit that I couldn't handle a damn stationary bike for fifteen minutes. I still can't. He was trying to be nice about it, but I could tell he was baffled that I was so unfit. I now work out alone.0 -
Men make me very nervous in general, especially large scary-looking men. It sounds kind of silly, but I go to school at one of the most athletic campuses in the country. If you aren't tiny and fit, you're setting yourself up for ridicule at the co-ed gym.
The trainers are for the varsity athletes. I'm not going to embarrass myself.
This sounds like social anxiety. I have it (though not this bad) and I've known several people with it (you sound just like them). You may want to talk to a counsler about it. I know it sucks to be thrown out of your comfort zone and it's even worse if other people are around but you have to work through it.
I used to sit at my desk starving because I didn't want to go to the break room while there were people in there to heat up my lunch. So I would sit for 2 hours while everyone else finished their lunch shifts so I could go eat. It sounds rediculous, I know but it seemed better than having to go in there while there were 10 or so people in there.
Well one day I got tired of it and I marched in there, as hard as is was, to get my lunch out of the fridge and heat it up. You know what happened? Nothing. No one even noticed me in there. I keep pushing myself to do this every day even though I don't want to.
I do find that it's easier to do things around other people if I'm with someone I know. Do you have a friend that you could go to the co-ed gym with? The two of you can work together and it's a lot easier.
If you truely do have social anxiety, you need to find a way past it or you will end up a shut in. Go see a doctor and explain what you're feeling so you can get help.
I do have social anxiety, and I have worked past it in almost every respect...except fitness/nutrition. I used to never be able to go to office hours with professors or ask questions in class, or ask friends to socialize. I've gotten past all those. Working out is the only thing still in my way.
The time I went to the co-ed gym, I brought my boyfriend, who isn't fit either. It turned out to be extremely embarrassing.
You were able to overcome all your other problems, why would fitness be any different. You can overcome that too. Keep going back. You don't have to be "fit" to go to the gym. That's how you get fit.
Maybe your boyfriend isn't the best person to go with. Maybe you have a friend that's in a little better shape. You could also try going with headphones on. Don't look at anyone and turn your music up so you can't hear them. Again, this is a battle you've fought before on different fields so you know you can get through it.0 -
I think first, and foremost you need to see a mental health professional. You have way more important issues going on that need some immediate treatment than not being able to lift 8 lb dumbbells.0
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I think first, and foremost you need to see a mental health professional. You have way more important issues going on that need some immediate treatment than not being able to lift 8 lb dumbbells.
This.0 -
You'll get stronger. Just be aware of your limitations, like loose joints. If you are hyperflexible at all in your shoulders, be careful with overhead movements. I dislocated my shoulder once from a strict shoulder press, and I now have four screws in there. Before that, I was doing Olympic lifting. You just never know. But yeah, that's my cautionary tale; take it with a grain of salt. Don't be scared to go outside of your comfort zone. It'll be worth it, I promise.
Edit: I didn't read all of the posts. I do agree with what people are saying about seeking help.0 -
in...to read later0
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Men make me very nervous in general, especially large scary-looking men. It sounds kind of silly, but I go to school at one of the most athletic campuses in the country. If you aren't tiny and fit, you're setting yourself up for ridicule at the co-ed gym.
The trainers are for the varsity athletes. I'm not going to embarrass myself.
This sounds like social anxiety. I have it (though not this bad) and I've known several people with it (you sound just like them). You may want to talk to a counsler about it. I know it sucks to be thrown out of your comfort zone and it's even worse if other people are around but you have to work through it.
I used to sit at my desk starving because I didn't want to go to the break room while there were people in there to heat up my lunch. So I would sit for 2 hours while everyone else finished their lunch shifts so I could go eat. It sounds rediculous, I know but it seemed better than having to go in there while there were 10 or so people in there.
Well one day I got tired of it and I marched in there, as hard as is was, to get my lunch out of the fridge and heat it up. You know what happened? Nothing. No one even noticed me in there. I keep pushing myself to do this every day even though I don't want to.
I do find that it's easier to do things around other people if I'm with someone I know. Do you have a friend that you could go to the co-ed gym with? The two of you can work together and it's a lot easier.
If you truely do have social anxiety, you need to find a way past it or you will end up a shut in. Go see a doctor and explain what you're feeling so you can get help.
I do have social anxiety, and I have worked past it in almost every respect...except fitness/nutrition. I used to never be able to go to office hours with professors or ask questions in class, or ask friends to socialize. I've gotten past all those. Working out is the only thing still in my way.
The time I went to the co-ed gym, I brought my boyfriend, who isn't fit either. It turned out to be extremely embarrassing.
Elaborate on bold?
I was so unfit that I couldn't handle a damn stationary bike for fifteen minutes. I still can't. He was trying to be nice about it, but I could tell he was baffled that I was so unfit. I now work out alone.
Everyone starts somewhere. As a tall, relatively strong man, I can tell you that I don't judge others at the gym. If I saw you at the gym, I would leave you alone. Unless you were about to hurt yourself, but I would do that for anyone. Nobody else I talk with judges either. I have many friends at the gym: guys who are training to be bodybuilders, guys trainings to be powerlifters, women doing both of those, fit people, fat people, curl bros. I know a guy who works out with a girl, and he can't lift as much as she can. Nobody is judging anyone. Fitness is a personal journey, and everyone starts somewhere and goes on from there. People who spend time in the gym on a regular basis do one of two things: Keep their heads down and mind their own stuff, or talk to people and make friends with people they see regularly.
Everything here is in your head, and you gotta get out of your own head. You can't grow if you don't leave your comfort zone.0 -
Men make me very nervous in general, especially large scary-looking men. It sounds kind of silly, but I go to school at one of the most athletic campuses in the country. If you aren't tiny and fit, you're setting yourself up for ridicule at the co-ed gym.
The trainers are for the varsity athletes. I'm not going to embarrass myself.
This sounds like social anxiety. I have it (though not this bad) and I've known several people with it (you sound just like them). You may want to talk to a counsler about it. I know it sucks to be thrown out of your comfort zone and it's even worse if other people are around but you have to work through it.
I used to sit at my desk starving because I didn't want to go to the break room while there were people in there to heat up my lunch. So I would sit for 2 hours while everyone else finished their lunch shifts so I could go eat. It sounds rediculous, I know but it seemed better than having to go in there while there were 10 or so people in there.
Well one day I got tired of it and I marched in there, as hard as is was, to get my lunch out of the fridge and heat it up. You know what happened? Nothing. No one even noticed me in there. I keep pushing myself to do this every day even though I don't want to.
I do find that it's easier to do things around other people if I'm with someone I know. Do you have a friend that you could go to the co-ed gym with? The two of you can work together and it's a lot easier.
If you truely do have social anxiety, you need to find a way past it or you will end up a shut in. Go see a doctor and explain what you're feeling so you can get help.
I do have social anxiety, and I have worked past it in almost every respect...except fitness/nutrition. I used to never be able to go to office hours with professors or ask questions in class, or ask friends to socialize. I've gotten past all those. Working out is the only thing still in my way.
The time I went to the co-ed gym, I brought my boyfriend, who isn't fit either. It turned out to be extremely embarrassing.
Elaborate on bold?
I was so unfit that I couldn't handle a damn stationary bike for fifteen minutes. I still can't. He was trying to be nice about it, but I could tell he was baffled that I was so unfit. I now work out alone.
Everyone starts somewhere. As a tall, relatively strong man, I can tell you that I don't judge others at the gym. If I saw you at the gym, I would leave you alone. Unless you were about to hurt yourself, but I would do that for anyone. Nobody else I talk with judges either. I have many friends at the gym: guys who are training to be bodybuilders, guys trainings to be powerlifters, women doing both of those, fit people, fat people, curl bros. I know a guy who works out with a girl, and he can't lift as much as she can. Nobody is judging anyone. Fitness is a personal journey, and everyone starts somewhere and goes on from there. People who spend time in the gym on a regular basis do one of two things: Keep their heads down and mind their own stuff, or talk to people and make friends with people they see regularly.
Everything here is in your head, and you gotta get out of your own head. You can't grow if you don't leave your comfort zone.
Thank you. This made me feel better.0 -
Men make me very nervous in general, especially large scary-looking men. It sounds kind of silly, but I go to school at one of the most athletic campuses in the country. If you aren't tiny and fit, you're setting yourself up for ridicule at the co-ed gym.
The trainers are for the varsity athletes. I'm not going to embarrass myself.
This sounds like social anxiety. I have it (though not this bad) and I've known several people with it (you sound just like them). You may want to talk to a counsler about it. I know it sucks to be thrown out of your comfort zone and it's even worse if other people are around but you have to work through it.
I used to sit at my desk starving because I didn't want to go to the break room while there were people in there to heat up my lunch. So I would sit for 2 hours while everyone else finished their lunch shifts so I could go eat. It sounds rediculous, I know but it seemed better than having to go in there while there were 10 or so people in there.
Well one day I got tired of it and I marched in there, as hard as is was, to get my lunch out of the fridge and heat it up. You know what happened? Nothing. No one even noticed me in there. I keep pushing myself to do this every day even though I don't want to.
I do find that it's easier to do things around other people if I'm with someone I know. Do you have a friend that you could go to the co-ed gym with? The two of you can work together and it's a lot easier.
If you truely do have social anxiety, you need to find a way past it or you will end up a shut in. Go see a doctor and explain what you're feeling so you can get help.
I do have social anxiety, and I have worked past it in almost every respect...except fitness/nutrition. I used to never be able to go to office hours with professors or ask questions in class, or ask friends to socialize. I've gotten past all those. Working out is the only thing still in my way.
The time I went to the co-ed gym, I brought my boyfriend, who isn't fit either. It turned out to be extremely embarrassing.
Elaborate on bold?
I was so unfit that I couldn't handle a damn stationary bike for fifteen minutes. I still can't. He was trying to be nice about it, but I could tell he was baffled that I was so unfit. I now work out alone.
Go see a psychiatrist.0
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