School Dress Codes

I have a relative in high school, and their dress codes aren't particularly strict, but they seem random. And I think it is sexist - the girls can't wear tank tops but the guys can? Have you seen those teenage boys wearing those sleeveless, sideless t-shirts? You can see nipple! No restrictions on those, but my sensible, A-student cousin can't wear anything that shows her shoulder? Boys can wear skinny jeans but girls can't? It's not about appropriateness, it's about teaching girls and women that the body shape that they have by virtue of their gender is automatically wrong, shameful, and unacceptably sexy.

Uhm. Sigh. Boys do not have breasts. Hence, boys can wear shorts only to the pool, and girls cannot. Turn it around - this is also why it is ok for women to wear a bikini bottom to swim whereas boys and mean tend to wear more modest, looser fitting bathing shorts. They have something private to cover up. Basic anatomy, not that the body is "wrong " and they're not "shaming" anyone. It is entirely about appropriateness.

You totally seem to miss that women's bodies are sexualized by our society in a way that men's are absolutely not.

Because the conversation is about school dress codes for high school kids. Sometimes taking a broader political/social viewpoint on a localized, age specific issue unneccesarily burdens the topic at hand. Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar.

And your contribution to the conversation is that the rules don't need to be applied in a universal manner because some bodies are more alluring than others. It stands to reason the point I am making is extremely relevant.

I just disagree. That is allowed, right? America, freedom of thought and speech, yes?

I suppose I just take a more pragmatic view of these things. To me, this is less of an equality issue and more of a common sense issue. If politicians and businessmen choose the color of their ties to pyschologically and subliminally influence their audience, how much more do you need to extrapolate that clothing choices matter when dealing with hormonal teens? This attitude - they should just control themselves extend both ways - including the one doing the dressing. Wearing tube tops and short shorts to school is not showing self control, nor is it showing an understanding of what is appropriate for time and place. For the adults around them to be arguing for their inclusion on a high school campus is really arguing for children's lives to be harder; placing MORE pressure to be thin, to be hot, to wear what "everyone else" is wearing. And for boys to struggle more with temptation. That girl he can't stop staring at in school, well, she's wearing a tube top, and her headlights are on. It really isn't a feminist issue. It's a human development issue. In my opinion.

I am not sure were I argued anything about short, shorts or tubes being appropriate for school but I am certain you argued that voluptuous women were hotter than less voluptuous women, so they should have to wear more clothes and have the rules applied more strictly. And I said that nonsense and a direct result of a society that sexualizes women's bodies (breasts etc) to an extreme extent. You are talking about how boys don't got showing off in speedos, but in other countries speedos are the norm. Women of all shapes and sizes in bikinis is the norm. It's not considered showing off -- it's just bodies. America has a unique obsession with modesty.

Whatever thoughts a boy has - they are his. They aren't caused by what a girl wears, they are natural and would likely occur no matter what a girl has on - it's hormonal. When we act like there is something "wrong" with those thoughts, we seek solutions over something we can't control with things we can -- like how young women dress. That is sexist and pretty unfair to everyone.

Of course not all clothing is appropriate for school -- but the idea that the rules don't need to be applied the same to everyone based on their body shape IS sexist. That's what your initial post was about. It's really, really sad.

Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar.

I have a relative in high school, and their dress codes aren't particularly strict, but they seem random. And I think it is sexist - the girls can't wear tank tops but the guys can? Have you seen those teenage boys wearing those sleeveless, sideless t-shirts? You can see nipple! No restrictions on those, but my sensible, A-student cousin can't wear anything that shows her shoulder? Boys can wear skinny jeans but girls can't? It's not about appropriateness, it's about teaching girls and women that the body shape that they have by virtue of their gender is automatically wrong, shameful, and unacceptably sexy.

Uhm. Sigh. Boys do not have breasts. Hence, boys can wear shorts only to the pool, and girls cannot. Turn it around - this is also why it is ok for women to wear a bikini bottom to swim whereas boys and mean tend to wear more modest, looser fitting bathing shorts. They have something private to cover up. Basic anatomy, not that the body is "wrong " and they're not "shaming" anyone. It is entirely about appropriateness.

You totally seem to miss that women's bodies are sexualized by our society in a way that men's are absolutely not.

Because the conversation is about school dress codes for high school kids. Sometimes taking a broader political/social viewpoint on a localized, age specific issue unneccesarily burdens the topic at hand. Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar.

And your contribution to the conversation is that the rules don't need to be applied in a universal manner because some bodies are more alluring than others. It stands to reason the point I am making is extremely relevant.

I just disagree. That is allowed, right? America, freedom of thought and speech, yes?

I suppose I just take a more pragmatic view of these things. To me, this is less of an equality issue and more of a common sense issue. If politicians and businessmen choose the color of their ties to pyschologically and subliminally influence their audience, how much more do you need to extrapolate that clothing choices matter when dealing with hormonal teens? This attitude - they should just control themselves extend both ways - including the one doing the dressing. Wearing tube tops and short shorts to school is not showing self control, nor is it showing an understanding of what is appropriate for time and place. For the adults around them to be arguing for their inclusion on a high school campus is really arguing for children's lives to be harder; placing MORE pressure to be thin, to be hot, to wear what "everyone else" is wearing. And for boys to struggle more with temptation. That girl he can't stop staring at in school, well, she's wearing a tube top, and her headlights are on. It really isn't a feminist issue. It's a human development issue. In my opinion.

I am not sure were I argued anything about short, shorts or tubes being appropriate for school but I am certain you argued that voluptuous women were hotter than less voluptuous women, so they should have to wear more clothes and have the rules applied more strictly. And I said that nonsense and a direct result of a society that sexualizes women's bodies (breasts etc) to an extreme extent. You are talking about how boys don't got showing off in speedos, but in other countries speedos are the norm. Women of all shapes and sizes in bikinis is the norm. It's not considered showing off -- it's just bodies. America has a unique obsession with modesty.

Whatever thoughts a boy has - they are his. They aren't caused by what a girl wears, they are natural and would likely occur no matter what a girl has on - it's hormonal. When we act like there is something "wrong" with those thoughts, we seek solutions over something we can't control with things we can -- like how young women dress. That is sexist and pretty unfair to everyone.

Of course not all clothing is appropriate for school -- but the idea that the rules don't need to be applied the same to everyone based on their body shape IS sexist. That's what your initial post was about. It's really, really sad.

You misunderstood what I said. I mentioned an incident that happened to ME regarding an unfair dress code. I was asking you to use your grey matter to extrapolate that to mean it is NOT sexist, because the issue was unfairness between two GIRLS. And to extrapolate further that if two GIRLS can wear the same thing and one look appropriate and another inappropriate, then certainly a dress code can be different for BOYS than GIRLS. I've already spent more time spelling out what is essentially common sense than I wanted to, so I'll respectfully bow out of the conversation now.

Doesn't almost every aspect of life have a "dress code"? I mean, no shirts, no shoes, no service? I don't understand how a dress code is a bad thing. God forbid kids these days have to follow rules! Are these girls going to whine and complain about their boss and company when they have a job with a dress code? Or call the media outlets when they get written up for breaking it? I think dressing appropriately for the situation is a "life skill" that these kids need. And seriously, the same dress code existed at my high school over 10 years ago with no real problems.

This X 100.
And I also support the mom who thwarts her son's relationships with girls who are tacky on social media. I have two daughters, and hope they aspire to run with their own class. They will and should be judged by the effort they put forth to be appropriate. To say it is sexist is silly. Young men are not prone to "sexy" poses because of social convention. But, if they look unkempt, follow strange trends or smell funny...they are suspect.

Kids NEED guidance at that age. Dress codes are appropriate.

Dress appropriately. School is for learning. This might be a good reason to adopt school uniforms.

I had three daughters. We only had one incident as they went through school. They knew better.

Roger That !

I had this dress code growing up in the 90's and in this day and age I dont think it is appropriate anymore. My daughter is in middle school and her regualtions state that the kids cant wear anything too saggy or too tight. She was pulled on stage by the principle with 3 other girls and embaressed in front of the student body because the principle felt her pants were too tight. I as the parent is the one that bought the pants. To me those pants are just fine since they are loose on the legs and hip area and being that they are skinny pants they will show the leg. She was told that she couldnt wear them because they were jeggings. One they arent jeggings and two the regualtions do not say that leggings, tights, or jeggings are not allowed. I went to the store and it seems that all that is offered more are the skinny legged jeans, and yogo type pants. Short skirts and shorts. I have to search for a normal t-shirt because all the shirts are cropped to wear you have to wear a tanktop under it and my daughter isnt allowed to wear those type shirts. At some point they are going to have to change what the dress is, its not the 90's anymore where you can buy mom jeans, in this day and age your lucky to find any clothes in the girls section that is now compatible with the dress code.

I understand that the school has a say in how things are run, but if the parents are letting their kids dress a certian way then you need to let the parents do their job and let the teachers focus on teaching. I refuse to make my children feel like they cant express themselves because the opposite sex is "distracted". Its a lame excuse for people to use, so they dont have to learn self control and self discipline.

Schools in England have uniforms. Even my 5 year old son has to wear a shirt and tie. It makes life much easier as at least they're all dressed the same, pretty much.

I work in a secondary school and we do have kids who will try it on a bit....trainers instead of shoes, short skirts, tight trousers, no blazer etc. My school isn't as strict as it could be, but it's on a deprived area. The Catholic school where I did my training is a lot stricter...girls can't wear trousers, no make-up is allowed and girls have to have their hair tied up.

We have occasional non-uniform days for Children in Need and things like that, and there's always a change in behaviour when kids are dressed more casually, although I suppose it's only a one off.

There should be dress codes though, but as long as kids are smart then I think it's ok. I would imagine if you live somewhere hot then you'd understandably wear a little less.

Doesn't almost every aspect of life have a "dress code"? I mean, no shirts, no shoes, no service? I don't understand how a dress code is a bad thing. God forbid kids these days have to follow rules! Are these girls going to whine and complain about their boss and company when they have a job with a dress code? Or call the media outlets when they get written up for breaking it? I think dressing appropriately for the situation is a "life skill" that these kids need. And seriously, the same dress code existed at my high school over 10 years ago with no real problems.

This X 100.
And I also support the mom who thwarts her son's relationships with girls who are tacky on social media. I have two daughters, and hope they aspire to run with their own class. They will and should be judged by the effort they put forth to be appropriate. To say it is sexist is silly. Young men are not prone to "sexy" poses because of social convention. But, if they look unkempt, follow strange trends or smell funny...they are suspect.

Elitist much? WTF Class??? :noway: :noway: :noway: :noway: :noway:

This is one reason I love homeschooling. Right now my kid is in his underpants while studying US Presidents. Later on, he'll probably dress like a ninja turtle and we'll go to the library for an art program and some time playing with his friends.

On another note, about being "distracted" in school. The hormones of puberty had me so hard in their evil grip that it really didn't matter what boys wore. I fantasized about their jeans-clad butts. I looked at the curve of their necks and imagined licking that. The sight of a boy's bicep emerging from a t-shirt sleeve made me crazy. And you don't even want to know where my mind went watching their hands and fingers... (dang, it's getting hot in my house for some reason)

As for the school dress code thing, I do like the idea of school uniforms. But maybe that's because I'm fashionably impaired and dressing for school always caused me such anxiety.