i don't judge obese people

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  • Miss_1999
    Miss_1999 Posts: 747 Member
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    I don't look at obese people as OMG your fat you need to lose weight. I look at them and think OMG please don't wait as long as I did to start getting healthy. So I guess in a way I am judging. I just know that I feel so much better for where I am right now, I still need to lose 60 lbs.

    The mistake you're making is equating weight with health. Those things aren't the same.

    In some instances maybe but you can not be morbidly obese and be healthy and if your morbidly obese then you weigh more than you should and your not healthy. You can however be overweight( NOT morbidly obese) and be healthy.

    I really don't mean to be a *****, but, and please correct me if I'm wrong, you're not a physician, and qualified to make that diagnosis. If that is your opinion, have at it all the live long day, but stating so as a fact, it's impossible to know. As a broad range, we do know that morbid obesity does put a person at a higher risk for poor health, or to develop a host of medical conditions such as but not limited to: Hypertension, Type II Diabetes, High Cholesterol, Heart Disease, Heart Attack, Stroke, Certain Types of Cancer(s), and Infertility in Women. However, this does NOT occur with every person struggling with morbid obesity and is a case by case basis.

    I have lost 177lbs. For all intents and purposes, I am what I consider, and my FNP considers "healthy". My blood pressure is normal. My cholesterol levels are normal, as are all of my other hormone levels, and blood work (I mention this because I live with PCOS. My PCOS was not cause by or is a by-product of obesity, I have lived with PCOS my entire life, but did not get a proper diagnosis until age 24.) In the picture I'm going to post of myself below, for me, and the way *I* want to look, I consider myself thin, I think most people would probably consider me *average*. The BMI charts call me OBESE. I am the face of obesity. I take ballet lessons at age 36. I swim, hike, walk, do yoga, and anything else that I want to that is fun and interesting to me. You can't judge a book by it's cover. If this is *obesity*, where I am right now, then I'll take it. I'm still working, losing a little here and there, but by no means am I upset with where I am considering where I've been.

    And no, I'm not trying to *defend* morbid obesity, and say, "Yay! Let's all be morbidly obese! It's healthy for us!" I'm not qualified to make that call, rather just encouraging our brothers and sisters to be the healthiest "you" no matter what weight they are. Everyone's gotta start somewhere with something, and yes, sometimes being the healthiest "you" does include weight loss.

    Me on September 3rd- 222lbs (considered obese by BMI) down from a high weight of 400lbs

    10527863_10152417160057872_513631794306101551_n.jpg?oh=64c48b69e6e74292ba1227490b2d0e1c&oe=5488C4DC&__gda__=1422563179_ed1ee660e7f567f76dfd6c8115f34d29
  • GertrudeHorse
    GertrudeHorse Posts: 646 Member
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    I don't look at obese people as OMG your fat you need to lose weight. I look at them and think OMG please don't wait as long as I did to start getting healthy. So I guess in a way I am judging. I just know that I feel so much better for where I am right now, I still need to lose 60 lbs.

    The mistake you're making is equating weight with health. Those things aren't the same.

    In some instances maybe but you can not be morbidly obese and be healthy and if your morbidly obese then you weigh more than you should and your not healthy. You can however be overweight( NOT morbidly obese) and be healthy.

    I suggest you familiarise yourself with the research that supports HAES (health at every size), of which there is an increasing amount. You can't diagnose someone's health or ill-health just by looking at them. And yes, obese people can indeed be healthy. They can also be healthier than a given person who is not fat. Weight does not determine your health. In some people it tends to be correlated, but that is explained by lifestyle differences not the weight itself. For example, inactive people tend to be less healthy than active people regardless of how much they weigh.

    Here's a link just to get you started with that research:
    http://www.examiner.com/article/new-study-finds-46-of-obese-people-are-metabolically-healthy
  • sparklelioness
    sparklelioness Posts: 600 Member
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    I don't judge. It's an addiction like any other - like heroin, or cigarettes or gambling or sex. it's possible to become psychologically addicted to anything that makes you feel good. I read about a couple in China who were so addicted to videogames they neglected their toddler til he died.

    And just like any addiction, people are ready to deal with it when they're ready - and some are never ready. The thing with food addiction is it shows on the outside. Most other addictions you can hide - food addiction is unmistakeable. And people who may smoke a pack a day, or can't get home from work without having a beer or six, or who are overdrawn because they keep going to the track, or who can't stop texting and seeing other women (or men) behind their spouse's back - those people have the nerve to look at fat people and think (or say) "damn, look at them. No will power whatsoever. Pathetic", with absolutely no self-awareness as to how hippocritical they're being.

    I don't judge, because I've been there. Waking up and going to Jack In The Box and getting three breakfast sandwiches, a hash brown, and an oreo shake for breakfast. It was my morning fix. I thought about each meal the way a heroin addict thinks about their next shot. And when I ::didn't:: overeat, when I tried to eat healthy, everything I was using food to avoid would come crashing down on me, and I'd give in and go eat to make it go away.

    Obese people aren't lazy or weak (or not any weaker than any other people, anyway). They've just learned an unhealthy coping mechanism - eating way too much food for the temporary pleasure and stress relief it gives. (obviously there are exceptions, people with medical problems, ect). That's all. There are much bigger (pun intended) problems in the world to worry about than whether the person ahead of you in line is fat or not and how they got that way.
  • KrissyRawrz
    KrissyRawrz Posts: 342 Member
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    :flowerforyou:
  • farmerpam1
    farmerpam1 Posts: 402 Member
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    I guess for me, when this topic was first posted, responded that since finding MFP, I don't judge. And some replied by telling me it was human nature to judge. That we're hard wired to judge. What I meant was I don't assume the person I see, who is overweight, isn't working on their issue. How do I know they haven't already lost a lot of weight, how do I know the food I may see them eating isn't part of their daily intake, or something they've planned all week for. If anything, I now assume that they too are working, slow and steady on the issue. I don't judge that they are clueless, or lazy, or doing nothing about it, or whatever others may judge. I give them the benefit of the doubt, I believe that they too have found this site and are on the path and will succeed. Ya gotta believe!
  • Miss_1999
    Miss_1999 Posts: 747 Member
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    I guess for me, when this topic was first posted, responded that since finding MFP, I don't judge. And some replied by telling me it was human nature to judge. That we're hard wired to judge. What I meant was I don't assume the person I see, who is overweight, isn't working on their issue. How do I know they haven't already lost a lot of weight, how do I know the food I may see them eating isn't part of their daily intake, or something they've planned all week for. If anything, I now assume that they too are working, slow and steady on the issue. I don't judge that they are clueless, or lazy, or doing nothing about it, or whatever others may judge. I give them the benefit of the doubt, I believe that they too have found this site and are on the path and will succeed. Ya gotta believe!

    Exactly! That's what I'm getting at! Retraining our minds. Yeah, unfortunately, our parents, family, friends, society has *taught* us certain *norms* about so many things, but it is absolutely possible for us to not and/or learn begin to not judge by using empathy and compassion. Realizing that we don't know the first thing about another person. We don't have any information about them when we see them at first glance. We don't know what they've been through, what they're going through, or what they're doing at this point in their lives. Of course, we're all going to fall short from time to time, myself included, but we can make a change and a difference. I saw this image on pinterest, and it was spot on. It's most definitely not human nature by any means to judge. It's ingrained in us, by what we're taught.

    2d4a0035d5b123e7e397e3bf5ce3c3f2.jpg
  • astroophys
    astroophys Posts: 175 Member
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    I don't look at obese people as OMG your fat you need to lose weight. I look at them and think OMG please don't wait as long as I did to start getting healthy. So I guess in a way I am judging. I just know that I feel so much better for where I am right now, I still need to lose 60 lbs.

    The mistake you're making is equating weight with health. Those things aren't the same.

    In some instances maybe but you can not be morbidly obese and be healthy and if your morbidly obese then you weigh more than you should and your not healthy. You can however be overweight( NOT morbidly obese) and be healthy.

    I suggest you familiarise yourself with the research that supports HAES (health at every size), of which there is an increasing amount. You can't diagnose someone's health or ill-health just by looking at them. And yes, obese people can indeed be healthy. They can also be healthier than a given person who is not fat. Weight does not determine your health. In some people it tends to be correlated, but that is explained by lifestyle differences not the weight itself. For example, inactive people tend to be less healthy than active people regardless of how much they weigh.

    Here's a link just to get you started with that research:
    http://www.examiner.com/article/new-study-finds-46-of-obese-people-are-metabolically-healthy

    A million lols and hoping to God that no one takes this seriously. The HAES movement is absolutely terrible and hellbent on telling obese people that fat/weight has nothing to do with health. Just stop it.
  • refuseresist
    refuseresist Posts: 934 Member
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    I guess for me, when this topic was first posted, responded that since finding MFP, I don't judge. And some replied by telling me it was human nature to judge. That we're hard wired to judge. What I meant was I don't assume the person I see, who is overweight, isn't working on their issue. How do I know they haven't already lost a lot of weight, how do I know the food I may see them eating isn't part of their daily intake, or something they've planned all week for. If anything, I now assume that they too are working, slow and steady on the issue. I don't judge that they are clueless, or lazy, or doing nothing about it, or whatever others may judge. I give them the benefit of the doubt, I believe that they too have found this site and are on the path and will succeed. Ya gotta believe!

    I don't really think about people in that kind of detail. Oh, there's a person. Maybe a fat person, Maybe a thin person, Maybe a small child, elderly Indian man, whatever. I couldn't care less what they are or are not doing with their lives. ETA assuming they are not trying to bother me or commit some sort of crime. I see people everywhere, I have not got the time or inclination to be spending my time thinking about any of them
  • bumblebreezy91
    bumblebreezy91 Posts: 520 Member
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    I didn't see that other topic, but I love this message!