IF YOU ARE MARRIED :)
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We don't really celebrate Valentine's day except for the kids. As for keeping things happy we touch a lot. Even non-sexual touching is bonding IMO and if you're close to your partner sex is better.
We've been married for 10.5 years, together for 12.5.0 -
Since my hubby is a trucker, I love to send him flowers at this job. He loves the attention and I like the thought of this big guy getting a bouquet with a little bear.
But we honestly don't do anything for V-Day because we hate being in crowds. This year we may go out swing dancing, though. It's a lot of fun and it's physical. We may also do a family hike and picnic.
As far as how we keep things lively, we always make time for each other by having dates. Even if it's only getting away for two hours alone for coffee or frozen yogurt. We hold hands and giggle a lot.0 -
Valentine's Day is just a day. I try and show appreciation for my husband everyday - in small ways.
Keeping the spark alive - I don't feel like it's dying, so that's a hard question. We try and eat dinner together, go on runs together, and talk about the hard topics - even if they don't always make us feel good. I try not to criticize him, especially in areas where he is less confident.
Intimacy, for me, is a relationship that provides me with emotional support and someone who accepts me for all of my weaknesses.
Good books: "Getting the Love that You Want" by Harville Hendrix or "Passionate Marriage" by David Snarch0 -
Hmm.. keeping it alive, whats that? LOL
Been married 5 years and have 2 children as much as I hate to admit it that part of it is dead - so if you guys figure out the key to keeping it alive I sure would like to know (only because its good calorie burn you know HAHAHA jk)
If he says he doesn't want anything for V-Day i try to keep it simple and understated and usually get him a card w/ a gift anyway.0 -
Our anniversary is the 11th, so we typically celebrate that and not Valentine's Day. We're going out to dinner to our favorite restaurant for the anniversary (6 years) and then will probably go home and watch the new episode of Supernatural that airs Friday
We're a bit nerdy.0 -
Hmm.. keeping it alive, whats that? LOL
Been married 5 years and have 2 children as much as I hate to admit it that part of it is dead - so if you guys figure out the key to keeping it alive I sure would like to know (only because its good calorie burn you know HAHAHA jk)
If he says he doesn't want anything for V-Day i try to keep it simple and understated and usually get him a card w/ a gift anyway.
I am with her.. pass it along please that part is like an episode of CSI over here.0 -
I have been married 2 1/2 years and we've been together for 8 1/2 years. We both work shifts so sometimes are paths don't always cross during the week, but we make sure that we talk every day, always taking time out to chat. There is always kissing every day and we absolutely love each other's company. We're not big on V day, but there is always a card with some soppy writing in it.
We also giggle alot. I'm quite a 'laughy person' but no one can make me laugh like hubby does and he says the same about me. I guess talking is the main thing about keeping things alive for us. We always know what is going on in the other person's life and being married to your best friend just keeps getting better every day!0 -
My bday and Vday are close together. We (if hubby remembers it) go to eat on my bday but have never done anything for Vday. It's a god awful "holiday" of people trying to be sappy and I wouldn't be caught dead trying to go to a restaurant amidst all the love birds that night!!! Plus, we hate the pressure of - oh my gosh I have to think of something to top last year!!! 0
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My husband's birthday is the 17th of February and it is hard to find two great gifts. For Valentine's Day I'm having a variety box of Mrs. Fields cookies and brownies sent to his office (he is an athlete and eats very well but loves the occasional splurge). Plus, his co-workers will be pleased, too!
For his birthday I found an old working antique camera that is very rare (found tons of film for it as well)! I'll give it to him at his get-together with friends so he can take some memorable pictures. It's a great gift because he's also a photographer and the woman had no idea what a jem she had and sold it to me for $40!!!
Good luck!0 -
My husband and I have been married 20 years, actually in September it will be 21 years. It's all the little things, like asking how his day was, sending him a silly text during the day, putting little notes in his lunch box, and communicating with one another. He suprises me with flowers ever so often, always tells me how beautiful I am, even when I i'm looking bad that day. Valentine's day really is just another Hallmark holiday, my husband gives our daughter a dozen of roses ever since she was a little girl she is now 16..0
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We don't lose touch with each other. Take the time to to do it right. We keep each other as a priority no matter what. if work keeps us from spending to little time with each other. We send notes in lunch boxes , leave a text message. Always keep in touch. Plus when we get a couple of days together we don't let something come in between us and disrupt it. Our time for us is just that. Sit down and have meals together and talk about how things are going.Most importantly treat each other as if it were the first time you got together. communicate and enjoy each others company. Me and my man have been together now for nine years and each new day gives us yet anther reason to continue on loving each other and making each other feel needed and loved. It's the little things that mean the most. The little sayings , winks across the room, the touching. cuddling all those little things that add up to a wonderful relationship. And, the fringe benefits area great relationship with your best friend that will last a life time. And, there is of coarse awesome sex.0
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It is hard. My husband and I will be together 8 years in April, married for 5 years in May and we have 2 wonderful kids and he is a 3rd shift truck driver, and I'm a SAHM, so as you can imagine, its pretty rough keeping the flame lit, but we love each other and we do what we can. We call each other (most of the time, he's not home, he'll be gone Mon-Sat morning, so our time together is Saturday night, Sunday, and then part of Monday morning). We try to celebrate V-day, but I'm more of a romantic than he is......he use to be better about things, but things has slowly faded away. Every now and then my inlaws will take the kids and watch them and we get a night alone together, but its maybe once a month or whenever we get a chance, so I'm not sure otherwise how to keep it alive, but I know come the weekend, we're both ready for some snuggling and fun :smooched:
:blushing: 0 -
I'm going on 14 years of blissful marriage to my gorgeous wife. I don't wait till the holidays to celebrate, read alot of relationship books, and end every conversation with I love you!0
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We have been married 20 yrs this august, I think the key is making time for each other, leaving notes and making sure you hug and kiss everyday0
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We dont do valentines day. maybe a card. but we do get our boys something special. I am from the thinking the valentines is just another day and a stupid holiday created for jewlers, resturants and florists to make $$. TO me I would rather get flowers say on May 23 than on Feb 14th. That shows that he truly loves me, rather than following a herd.
my birthday is 3 days after Valentines day. so as I said above we skip vday and get straight to the real celebration!0 -
I couldn't think of anything worse than being married :happy:0
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I couldn't think of anything worse than being married :happy:
I laughed so hard I nearly peed myself and I have tears streaming down my face from the laughter0 -
Wish I knew the secret. My wife and I just work together. Been together for 21 years.
-We don't agree on everything, but we don't fight. We compromise when we can. Sometimes we go my way, sometimes we go hers.
-We don't keep score.
-We come to an agreement in regards to our kids before we discuss things with them.
-We end all conversations, phone, emails, discussions with "I love you".
-If I do something wrong, I apologize.
-I rarely fight for principle with Jan. I consider each individual situation and consider whether getting my way is more important than my relationship overall. So far, nothing has been.
-I can't pass her in a room without touching her, or her me.
-There is no jealousy shown in either direction.
Honestly, I don't know what she sees in me. I got the best part of this deal.
What are we going to do for Valentine's Day? Depends on what else is going on in our lives at the time. I got her a box of chocolates and a diamond and sapphire necklace. I'l leave it on the dining room table when I leave for work on Monday with a card. Whatever else is up in the air. Don't know if Holland will be home that night. We may go out for dinner. Could be 2, 3 or 4 for dinner. I might make her favorie meal. We may just make some finger food, pour some wine (for her), Knob Creek (for me), set up the massage table, plug a couple DVD "Training Films" in and "get jiggy with it".0 -
I couldn't think of anything worse than being married :happy:
I laughed so hard I nearly peed myself and I have tears streaming down my face from the laughter
why?0 -
Ive been married 22 years ( yes to the same girl ). First off, you need to want to keep it alive....just like quitting smoking, if you realy dont want to you wont, no matter how many patches or pills you use. I cook for my wife whenever im home, I still buy her chocolates and flowers (when i remember) on VD, but mostly im not home on VD...so....i just show her i lover her...all the time ...every day..from one or two phone calls a day..to telling her i lover her everyday..... to lettting her take care of her needs when we go shopping for stuff..( I want dunbbells..she wants uggs ).....that and ai chase her around the bed nekid every chance i get !:blushing:0
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valentines day is my 4 year anniversry.Me and my husband just moved to dallas and rented a 2 bedroom apartment untill we got setteled.So our 3 yr old sleeps in the room with us her bed is right next to ours needless to say there is no fun in my bed till our lease is up:sad:0
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I've been with my hubby for 6 years and married for over 4. We keep it alive mostly because I just look at him and wanna jump on him hehe. He does the same thing. Sometimes you would swear we were fresh in the relationship the way we can't stop hugging and kissing each other. We also like to tease each other that way when we do get a chance for some love making the desire for it has been building up for awhile. Also my hubby is my best friend, I can talk to him about anything. We talk for hours still about nothing most of the time. Its kinda nice that we can do that. We haven't gotten lost in the kids and house and bills. We still have to talk about that stuff too but we didn't get lost in everyday life and forget each other. As for Valentine's day, we don't really do anything special for it most of the time cause it costs money we would rather put into something useful instead of cards or candy for each other.
Also one of the biggest tricks I've found that helps keep our sex life alive is that we joke about bringing home someone else to join us and we're people watchers so when we are out we'll both be looking at everyone and checking them out. We make sure to point the people out to each other and it sparks a little jealousy but the good kind not the kind that drives people apart. But we also are very confident in each other that it will never turn into something else. If that is there though it would ruin most couples.0 -
I couldn't think of anything worse than being married :happy:
I laughed so hard I nearly peed myself and I have tears streaming down my face from the laughter
why?
It was just funny in my opinion Hey if you don't want to ever get married more power to you 0 -
I couldn't think of anything worse than being married :happy:
I laughed so hard I nearly peed myself and I have tears streaming down my face from the laughter
why?
It was just funny in my opinion Hey if you don't want to ever get married more power to you
:-), I would be rubbish at being married, I have the attention span of a fruitfly!0 -
I've been with my husband for 18 years? I ask the question...let me do the math...yes. It's our anniversary the day before Valentine's day. Not our wedding anniversary, but the anniversary of the day we met and instantly *knew*.
So anyway I suggest not having sex for several months and then attacking him, that always works!
Just kidding, but that's the plan I'm on since I have a young baby haha.
NO seriously- I just think it's a good idea to always be considerate. If you're going through a rough time in your marriage for example it's a good time to look at yourself first and see if you're doing everything you can for your own relationship vs gunning at him to make him conform to your ideas. That's just a good first check before you explode into arguments about how he sucks- if he truly sucks, well then, you have work to do.
I don't think there's any pat answer to how to keep things 'fresh' in your marriage or what would you do for someone on V day. My premise is that you have to know your spouse and know them well. Surely if you're married to them that condition is met. Men are usually super hard to gift shop for and that means you better listen to every single golden word that falls out their mouth all year long! If my husband spent at least ten minutes listening closely to me he'd know at any given moment what to give me for a gift LOL. So I find myself constantly keeping my ear attuned to ANYTHING he finds interesting. If you know what they're into then you need to get something related to that. My husband is a UT alumni and loves football- I know nothing of football. But I asked around and looked at maps of the football seating LOL and called my brother in law to ask him where good seats were and gave my husband tickets to the A&M vs UT game for him and my son.
This Christmas I also bought him a trip to go to a very secluded island that he's been looking at, alone. That's right, alone. My husband is overworked and super dedicated to his family and me and he wants to chill on the beach with beers and go snorkeling on a primitive island? I'll give it to him..three days for himself. Everyone we know asked me what was wrong with me and why I would book him a trip by himself, why wouldn't I go too? Well- I'm a picky traveler. I prefer Four Seasons or something. He's not- and he just wanted to go relax and space out in the ocean. I realize my shortcomings and HIS needs so there you go.
My whole point is: you know him right? Then you know your own answer. Surely there is something..favorite band, hobby, preference..food? It just depends on his tastes.0 -
I usually get him some chocolate, he gets me flowers. This year we are going to Partner Yoga w/ champagne & dessert afterwards. He doesn't do Yoga, has only ever done P90X yoga, but he is going because I asked him. 0
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Hmm.. keeping it alive, whats that? LOL
Been married 5 years and have 2 children as much as I hate to admit it that part of it is dead - so if you guys figure out the key to keeping it alive I sure would like to know (only because its good calorie burn you know HAHAHA jk)
If he says he doesn't want anything for V-Day i try to keep it simple and understated and usually get him a card w/ a gift anyway.
You are way to young to have that part be dead.0 -
Make sure you get time alone together. We go hiking a lot, which helps us reconnect.
I've been waking my husband up with a back massage in the morning, which he loves! I also think it helps to be touching each other, you know? Get some massage oil (we have a massage bar from LUSH that I like a lot. It's not quite as messy or oily). Make sure you get some massages, too.
Make out in the backseat of a car on the side of the road.
For Valentine's Day, we got a couples massage and private spa room with a sauna and hot tub. It was two hours of awesome!0 -
Hmm.. keeping it alive, whats that? LOL
Been married 5 years and have 2 children as much as I hate to admit it that part of it is dead - so if you guys figure out the key to keeping it alive I sure would like to know (only because its good calorie burn you know HAHAHA jk)
If he says he doesn't want anything for V-Day i try to keep it simple and understated and usually get him a card w/ a gift anyway.
You are way to young to have that part be dead.
Your telling me! LOL0 -
Sometimes she likes to be the cowboy and I like to be the naughty nurse.0
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