why delete friends when they added you for support

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tiffvea
tiffvea Posts: 51
in Motivation and Support
It really ticks me off when I add friends for support, and when they don't think I'm doing enough, or working hard enough, they delete me as a friend....HELLO....that's why I add friends...for support and to keep me on track!
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Replies

  • ajbeans
    ajbeans Posts: 2,857 Member
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    Maybe there are other reasons for deleting you. I know I will delete people if I don't feel they're giving back the support I give them, or if I find that I can't support them the way I should because I don't understand their goals, or if we don't have as much in common as we thought we did, or if I feel they're negative. I don't know you, so I don't know if any of those reasons apply to you, but it might not be because they think you're not "doing enough." Or it might even be just that they have too many people on their friend list, so they go through and delete some.

    Don't take it personally or let it get you down. Just keep on trucking. :)
  • aflukey
    aflukey Posts: 2
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    I feel the same way I have only been using this program for a little over a month now and i have tried to add people and they add me for a day then delete me so i have given up on having any friends as support on here since no one keeps me as a friend
  • wendehaynie
    wendehaynie Posts: 13
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    definitely don't take it personally...it probably wasn't meant to be personal. unless it was one of your friends that you know outside of cyberspace...just keep moving forward with your hard work.
  • Celo24
    Celo24 Posts: 566 Member
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    Agree with ajbeans. Don't take it personally. We all "click" with some people and not others for a multitude of reasons. Just find people who mesh better with you and you'll both be better off for it!!
  • LongMom
    LongMom Posts: 408 Member
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    There is a limit on friends you can have - I think it's 250. Sometimes people have to cut out some of their friends to make room for new ones.
  • LizzetteRamirez
    LizzetteRamirez Posts: 26 Member
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    Hey, forget about them and get new friends. Dont let that bother you!:flowerforyou:
  • wendehaynie
    wendehaynie Posts: 13
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    i'm sorry that happens to you. just keep looking for the right kind of support. :)
  • kaits108
    kaits108 Posts: 305 Member
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    Eh I wouldn't take it personally. I delete when people haven't logged for awhile, or if they're super negative all the time. I'm on here to be motivated & enjoy positive people who are into a healthy lifestyle. There's so many people on this website, I'm sure you'll find other people who will help motivate you & support you, I wouldn't dwell on the people who just didn't click. :)
  • 00trayn
    00trayn Posts: 1,849 Member
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    At least for me, the 250 limit on friends has a huge impact on people that I delete out. It's a necessity in order to support people who want to friend me. I won't clean out people who are actively participating, but if you haven't logged on much and don't chat or anything, I tend to delete that person. It's just a matter of supporting people who are active and making room by deleting people who aren't. It's nothing personal.
  • Mairgheal
    Mairgheal Posts: 385 Member
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    Don't take it all too seriously now, it's definitely norhing personal - it's great to have some support here but your real friends are the ones that you actually know IRL, remember.
  • randi50
    randi50 Posts: 112
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    I wouldn't worry about it or take it personally. Everyone on my friend list are people I knew before comeing to MFP. I did add one person who requested me and she never said anything on my status etc so I didn't see the point in a one-way support system. :)
  • hpsnickers1
    hpsnickers1 Posts: 2,783 Member
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    My guess is the 250 friend limit. And if you don't log in for so long you can get deleted. Unfortunately this time of year you get a lot of new people who have New Year's Resolutions to lose weight or get fit so they join. Then they disappear.

    I had to delete two co-workers, one because she had to quit MFP for now and the other one just set up an account and never did anything with it. My other co-worker is on here, loves that I recommended it to her because it got her re-motivated which she says she needed. She's looking great now!

    I wouldn't worry about those people. You don't know them and it won't make a difference if you never hear from them again. There are plenty of supporters on this site.
  • superstarcassie
    superstarcassie Posts: 296 Member
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    Sometimes people don't vibe with you or your personality. I sometimes delete if there is a lot of whining or negativity going on...its nothing personal- just keeping myself positive and motivated. Also, if they haven't logged in for weeks....I clear out my list too. Keep working hard and find a new set of friends that can help motivate or support you. Also- find that motivation from inside and you will see amazing results!!
  • cheangela
    cheangela Posts: 173
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    You can meet 100's of people on here and it's hard to weed out the people you have enough in common with to actually benefit from the interaction. Please don't take it personally if people remove you, they just don't feel a connection with you.

    I deleted a dude yesterday just because he was kind of dumb. He didn't want to listen and he just wanted to dish out "advice" that really made no sense. It's nothing against him, I just don't have the patience for certain types of people.
  • Fat2FitChick
    Fat2FitChick Posts: 451 Member
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    I have removed a few biddies on here but only when they stop working, like they haven't signed in for more than a week or so. Of if their language is aweful and offensive but other than that I stick with whoever I add.
  • jojospaghettio
    jojospaghettio Posts: 62 Member
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    I've felt the same way before. Not that it is right, but it sure is hard not to take it personal when you are already frustrated with your size and health. So I completely understand. You are welcome to add me, if you would like. I'm not perfect, but I try to lend support when I can.
  • godblessourhome
    godblessourhome Posts: 3,892 Member
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    At least for me, the 250 limit on friends has a huge impact on people that I delete out. It's a necessity in order to support people who want to friend me. I won't clean out people who are actively participating, but if you haven't logged on much and don't chat or anything, I tend to delete that person. It's just a matter of supporting people who are active and making room by deleting people who aren't. It's nothing personal.

    same here. :)
  • JoyousRen
    JoyousRen Posts: 3,823 Member
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    I delete people because they haven't been on in a while, don't post, don't log, etc. It's not that I don't think they are doing enough. It's more that people come and go on a website like this without always deleting their account. I dispise clutter in my life and that includes in my friends list. It may seem cold but if I'm going through my friends list and see that someone hasn't done anything in two weeks, I don't see the point in keeping them on my list. It's hard to support someone that doesn't even log on.
  • proverbs31chick
    proverbs31chick Posts: 485 Member
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    It really ticks me off when I add friends for support, and when they don't think I'm doing enough, or working hard enough, they delete me as a friend....HELLO....that's why I add friends...for support and to keep me on track!

    I agree with you, I have seen some people's info about them and they say if your diary is not public, if your not working out or doing this that or the other I will delete you. I am like wow, first of all it is impossible to look at all my friends diary's and keep track of them. This is a support site, if you feel someone is slacking then you can offer a word of advise, no one is perfect and we are all at different stages. Well feel free to add me.
  • PeachyKeene
    PeachyKeene Posts: 1,645 Member
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    Sometimes people get jealous of the progress your making. So they delete you, so they don't have to face that they are just not doing as good as they should.

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