I give up.

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  • ninyagwa
    ninyagwa Posts: 341 Member
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    I sent you a private message, and it wasn't mean I promise. You sound sad my dear, and I send you my good vibes and e-hugs. Please don't get discouraged by other people. The only way you'll really dissapoint yourself is if you stop trying. The only way to fail is to stop trying (maybe I'll get that tattoed backwards on my forhead for my bad days so I can just look in the mirror). Try to distance yourself from the negative Nancies in your home life, and remember you are you, they are not, you have to live your life, not them, and you're doing your best to improve it.

    Also, I suggest listening to somone who doesn't sing with an epic sadness in her voice. Billie Holiday always makes me this beautiful kind of sad, but sometimes you need someone a little more postive to sing to your soul.

    Add me if you want positive support.
  • BunnybeeJG
    BunnybeeJG Posts: 344 Member
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    I do not know you or anything about you. I'm not going to judge you, only offer my opinion. If you are gaining weight off of 1300 calories a day, I would take a look at what type of foods you are eating. I could eat < 1300 calories a day eating only hot pockets, but I will not lose weight that way. Also, what are you doing for exercise?

    There's so many opinions here, and probably less than 1% of us are qualified at ALL to be offering serious advice when it comes to health. If something works for you, do it. If you are knowingly hurting yourself, take small steps to give your body the nutrition it needs to continue. Or you copy other people who are succeeding until you find a solution that works best for you.

    If you want something bad enough, you will find a way. If you don't, you'll find an excuse.

    Best wishes, dear. :)
    Chels

    I do the archtrainer machine or whatever the heck its called for at least an hour at 100 for the resistance and 10 on the 'ramp' sometimes i go up to 2 hours... I do the stairs.. i do crunches and all that stuff... I've set myself to eating at least three times a day... protein drinks and fiber... and salads i'm addicted to hummus and i've been eating healthy choice stuff sometimes... fruits, veggies, i rarely drink soda ever now ... i make my own dinner most of the time at least 2 times or more a week, i'm only going out to eat for special occassions... and at least 2 times every month just for the heck of it with friends to drink and just have a good time... I haven't gained the weight back... ... i was at about 238 in december... had a doctor tell me that i should consider taking in lower calories and then upping them slowly to help my metabolism. i managed to get down to 225 and then made a concious decision to keep doing what i was doing and take that advice and since then have lost 8 more ... its just really hurtful. I understand that everyones different and everyone is going to tell me that i'm hurting myself but i'm not starving myself.. if i'm hungry i eat i just am finding foods that are lower that fill me enough to not need to eat as much...before i had a tendancy to skip a lot of meals ... eat once a day and make excuses not to go to the gym i slept in a lot or tried to on my days off and just felt so horrible...
  • Polish_Princess
    Polish_Princess Posts: 109
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    I know how you feel about not losing the weight. I struggle myself with losing and gaining. But like everyone else says, you've lost 8lb so far, so that's great! One thing that's helping me is my husband and I are both doing it together. We've been sticking to a diet called the "Eat Clean Diet". It's really good, you should take a look at (http://eatcleandiet.com/), there's several books, as well as cook books. Hope this helps! Stay strong!! :happy:
  • BunnybeeJG
    BunnybeeJG Posts: 344 Member
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    I know how you feel about not losing the weight. I struggle myself with losing and gaining. But like everyone else says, you've lost 8lb so far, so that's great! One thing that's helping me is my husband and I are both doing it together. We've been sticking to a diet called the "Eat Clean Diet". It's really good, you should take a look at (http://eatcleandiet.com/), there's several books, as well as cook books. Hope this helps! Stay strong!! :happy:

    ya. i work at borders books... heh.
  • strandedeyes
    strandedeyes Posts: 392 Member
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    I know how you feel about not losing the weight. I struggle myself with losing and gaining. But like everyone else says, you've lost 8lb so far, so that's great! One thing that's helping me is my husband and I are both doing it together. We've been sticking to a diet called the "Eat Clean Diet". It's really good, you should take a look at (http://eatcleandiet.com/), there's several books, as well as cook books. Hope this helps! Stay strong!! :happy:

    ya. i work at borders books... heh.

    funny story, i worked for borders books for three years....
  • dave4d
    dave4d Posts: 1,155 Member
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    I've noticed that not everyone has the same goals, or ways to lose weight. Find what works for you, and stick to it. Some people it is through clean eating, some through smaller portions, some through exercise. It'll all help, but for some people it is not all realistic. Every little bit helps, whether it is just walking more, or working harder it is all exercise. It all helps.
  • BunnybeeJG
    BunnybeeJG Posts: 344 Member
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    I know how you feel about not losing the weight. I struggle myself with losing and gaining. But like everyone else says, you've lost 8lb so far, so that's great! One thing that's helping me is my husband and I are both doing it together. We've been sticking to a diet called the "Eat Clean Diet". It's really good, you should take a look at (http://eatcleandiet.com/), there's several books, as well as cook books. Hope this helps! Stay strong!! :happy:

    ya. i work at borders books... heh.

    funny story, i worked for borders books for three years....

    HAHAHAA i've been there 4. hm... ya. its.. could be worse. I love the people i work with and some of my customers. i think i've acquired their bad moods from today tho shiiite.
  • strandedeyes
    strandedeyes Posts: 392 Member
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    I know how you feel about not losing the weight. I struggle myself with losing and gaining. But like everyone else says, you've lost 8lb so far, so that's great! One thing that's helping me is my husband and I are both doing it together. We've been sticking to a diet called the "Eat Clean Diet". It's really good, you should take a look at (http://eatcleandiet.com/), there's several books, as well as cook books. Hope this helps! Stay strong!! :happy:

    ya. i work at borders books... heh.

    funny story, i worked for borders books for three years....

    HAHAHAA i've been there 4. hm... ya. its.. could be worse. I love the people i work with and some of my customers. i think i've acquired their bad moods from today tho shiiite.

    do not let those people bring you down...seriously those customers were some of the worst i have ever dealt with.... stupid people seriously
  • sconns21
    sconns21 Posts: 92 Member
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    You sound quite unhappy and depressed. Your focus on your weight seems pretty intense and could be what is making you unhappy. You need to stop focussing on your weight loss and get out and do things. Going to the gym can feel like punishment or torture, especially if you are going 5 times per week. You need to find some new hobbies or sports that you can do with friends or in a team. When you're out and about and busy you don't even notice that you're exercising/eating well/losing weight because you're too busy enjoying yourself.

    Be strong and stay optimistic, negative feelings don't do anybody any good they are destructive.

    P.S I know how you feel about people saying you're being unhealthy. I only eat around 1000 calories a day sometimes but if I eat the right things it is filling enough for me. Also when I was a UK size 6 everyone was getting very concerned because I used to be a UK size 10 but I had never felt healthier and more energetic.
  • Kirstie_C26
    Kirstie_C26 Posts: 490 Member
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    im sorry ur finding this lifestyle change so difficult just now :( but as everyone here has said we r all here for OUR OWN goals no-one else's and if anyone has tried to bring u down then tell them to go to hell and get off ur case as i commend anyone for trying to better themselves. it took me long enough to finally realise i was worth this and my god i will not let anyone put me off from what i want for myself, and neither shud u! uve come so far already hon so plz keep trying it will be more than worth it in the end

    friend me if u wana ok :)

    best wishes
    Kirstie x
  • smilebhappy
    smilebhappy Posts: 811 Member
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    Hi there,
    I'm sorry you are having a tough time but please Do Not Give Up!! You Can (& will) do this :smile:
    Somedays are tougher than others & sometimes you may take a few steps backwards but in time
    you will get better & better.....just take baby steps at first.

    Please hang in there......friend me if you like :flowerforyou:

    {{Don't set your goals by what other people deem important. Only you know what is best for you.}}
  • karensoxfan
    karensoxfan Posts: 902 Member
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    ... i was at about 238 in december... had a doctor tell me that i should consider taking in lower calories and then upping them slowly to help my metabolism. i managed to get down to 225 and then made a concious decision to keep doing what i was doing and take that advice and since then have lost 8 more ...

    My advice to you was going to be to talk to your doctor. Not for mental health, but your primary physician, to ask for his/her advice on your plan. I'm glad you've already done that and are taking that professional advice to heart.

    What you wrote is ambiguous though, as to how low did your Dr. recommend setting your calories. Did s/he recommend starting at 500 cal/day? Or was the advice more general and that's where you decided to start? I've never heard any Dr. recommend anything below 1000 cal/day, but (obviously), I don't know you or your Dr. I do know in general, that 1000 cal/day is a more widely recommended minimum to work from, but for your weight, I would guess that 1200-1300 would be a better starting point to lose weight, slowly & gradually decreasing that as you lose more until you reach your goal weight. Then, you'd start adding some calories to maintain the loss.

    But back to my original advice. Talk to your Dr. again. Explain what's been happening with your calories and weight, and ask for either more specific advice, or a referral to someone who can provide that detail for you (maybe a nutritionist?).

    Take care. (((hugs)))
  • BunnybeeJG
    BunnybeeJG Posts: 344 Member
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    I was having such a bad night. Lack of sleep and such....I wasn't giving up bc its too hard I was getting frustrated that people wanted me to eat more when I'm perfectly happy with what I'm doing now. I know it seems dangerous but for my height I'm obese and I need to start off this way to get it going. I love the gym actually. I work retail and its a huge stress reliever and besides its not as if I'm eating nothing. I'm eating. I'm eating good foods. Food I like depriving yourself never works anyway. And I eat more on days I work out. To even it out mostly. I don't go up to the 2000-3000 that somtimes seems to be recoomended by mfp from extra exercise but ya. What's killing me is that everyone is trying to take control over this too for me. And I'm getting frustrated. I have to get ready for work. Today I find out if we're closing too
  • vickyplum
    vickyplum Posts: 192 Member
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    Please dont give up!! your doing something for you and you have lost 8lbs already that's great in itself!!

    I yo-yo dieted for years and then at the begining of last year I decided enough was enough!!
    If your feeling good with what your doing keep doing it this is your journey and no-one elses
    and as has been said before every journey is diffrent!!
    I hope you stick with it and you will get to where you would like to be!!
    All my best wishes for you!!

    V xxx
  • BunnybeeJG
    BunnybeeJG Posts: 344 Member
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    Its hard to find hobbies ...I paint sometimes and write. I used to sing I used to perform but work and such has become ...the routine. I don't have a car. So that's always a problem. So I just go to the gym. I love it there. Cuz I can just relax
  • carocurl135
    carocurl135 Posts: 28
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    Its like quitting smoking. You quit, it sucks, you start again. You quit, it sucks, you start again.
    And then one day, you quit, it sucks, but you keep quitting. And then it is a week, then a month, then 7 years later.
    I have been sporadically dieting, losing weight, exercising, gaining weight for years and years, like all of us do.
    And then one day over a year ago, I said, thats it, I am 211 and almost 40 and this cannot go on. I am done with this. And I quit quitting.
    I have lost 54 lbs, I eat less, and better, and I go to the gym 5 days a week. I literally worked my *kitten* off. It is hard, and some days I dont want to go but I do.
    Some days suck, the scale just sits there and stares back. But some weeks it jumps. It has taken a long time to get it off but it is off and it is going to stay off.
    One day at a time. Thats all there is to it.
    It will stick one day. And then it will be years later, and you are healthy and happy and still alive!

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