Anybody have any suggestions for low self esteem and low wil

I agree with Griffin90 this is a bigger problem than just lack of discipline. You should speak to your doctor and request to see a counsellor. I hope you are able to sort out your problems. Good luck

Just keep repeating over and over again (in your head is fine), I am a wonderful person and I am worth the effort! Losing weight will not help you with the self esteem problem totally but will help. You'll feel more energetic and get more active and lose more weight etc. It's a "good" viscious cycle to "not" break. As far as will power, I have that problem myself. I love sweets and when we have a "snack day" at work no matter how many times I tell myself I won't partake, I see something that tempts me. Now I try to imagine food as "gas" that I put in my body. Putting in bad "gas" makes my car (boby) run badly. I take a short walk it I'm tempted or go get a drink of water. I've posted a picture of how I want to look and I just pull it out and look at it. I hope some of this helps. :happy:

they are both right with having a pro to talk to.i had that issue for a while and i did some belly dancing,it brings out your inner goddess and made me feel a lot better about myself.i still cant lose much weight but it doesn't bother me as much

I self sabatoge a lot too, very discouraging. I just started watching this thing on you tube, I don't have the link for it, but it is Bob Harper talking to a university, I think in VA about his experiences with Biggest Loser contestants. I only watched about the first 12 min, but he started talking about the negative messages we tell ourselves, and then I had to go do something, need to finish watching it. You can do a search for "Bob Harper and emotional eating" and it should come up. I think the thing that is helping me is that I have to keep telling myself that I do deserve to treat myself better. I have to tell that voice in my head to "SHUT UP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" because it is wrong. Good luck!!

First off, you need to surround yourself with postitive thinking and people. Put up motivation around your house (I use a pic of me from my honeymoon in a bikini in the kitchen on the fridge and one on the mirror in my bedroom where I get dressed ) You might even want to try motivational phrases around the house. (mirrors are a great place - practice repeating them to yourself, while looking at yourself YOU CAN DO IT!! YOU ARE WORTH IT!!! ) You need to be ready and willing to attack this journey head on!!! I had a difficult time starting my journey also, always looking at the big picture, the final result that I wanted to achieve. - I had to put that aside and start creating mini goals for myself. First I started by logging every little bite that I put in my mouth (even a few calories add up). After getting into that "new" habit, I then started to analyze what it was I was eating, and how I could make a better choice,and looking at the portions and seeing where I could reduce those portions - even by a bite or two. Before I knew it, it became second nature to think about what it was I wanted to put into my body. Look up "super foods" these are foods that are more sustainable, and help to keep your metabolism going. As for the exercise, just go out and do something, outside, gym, around the house, whatever you do that first day - you need to increase it the next, (distance, speed, effort etc). Each day trying to do a little more....eventually that too will become a "new habit". Smaller goals are easier to achieve making the ultimate goal realistic!!! Good luck and i know YOU CAN DO IT - if its truely what you want.

Instead of making a goal of 15, 20, 35+ lb. goals set 3, 7 pound goals since you have obviously achieved some weight loss. Make your goals shorter and more realistic. Don’t run the marathon, just attempt the shorter races. Be obsessive about recording what you eat and review your fitness pal totals. Start walking briskly (or exercising) so you can eat a few more calories daily. Personally, I went from 2500-4000 daily intake to 1850 plus exercise. I am a little hungry but because of exercise I always have 300-500 calories left for late snacks which I don’t completely use. I'm still trying to break the snack habit.
You’ve probably taken years to gain the weight and it takes years to lose it all and keep it off. By the way, this is meant for me to listen to as well as you, I just started myself and share your same concerns.
Now, I’m just looking out further, instead of this summer I’m targeting next year this time. Smaller bites, smaller goals better chance of success. Good luck.

I agree with furbjones. I've started and stopped enough weightloss efforts to know what is going to discourage me. The scale is the big one. After a week or so of "sort-of" committing myself to getting started, I'd quit if I hadn't lost a pile of weight. It's a horrible self-defeating behavior. This time around, I'm tossing the scale...for a long time at least. I got my starting weight recorded at the beginning of February, but I'm not getting on a scale again until the end of this month. Instead of focusing on the weight loss, focus on the more tangible things that DO start to change almost immediately. After a few days of consistent exercise, you will feel better. You'll have more energy, your muscles will start to get that lovely burn. Learn to love and appreciate those things, because they are easily achievable. At my last weigh in, I was 302 pounds, and I could barely finish 20 minutes on a stationary bike at a super-slow pace. Now, I've pushed myself to 60 minutes at a much quicker pace. I never in my LIFE thought I'd be able to work out for an hour straight. That is an accomplishment that I can completely relish in right here, right now. The weight? It took me 10 years to get this heavy. If it takes me 10 years to take it off, so be it! In the meantime, I'm building the life skills that I need to be healthy.

Give yourself achievable, but challenging, objectives! Don't be afraid to start small (my start small goal was to walk in place for 5-10 minutes a day. It's all I could do)! Don't be afraid to make goals! Don't be afraid to push yourself! Most of all, don't forget YOU ARE WORTH THIS. You deserve to live a happy, healthy, positively influenced life!

Hi there! You're talking to the queen of low self esteem - or at least I used to be. I still question myself and don't always see all the good, (for example, it took my partner showing me pictures for me to really see how well I am doing with my weight loss) , but I am considerably better than I've been all my life. I won't bore you with the details of why, but let's just say that the people around you and the way they treat you, starting young, tends to have a lot to do with self esteem as an adult. Anyway, the realization for me was that frankly, what others think simply does not matter, it is what I think of me that's important. But how to start thinking better of myself? Well, first, make the decision to make the change. That's the first step. Then work on the plan. For me, I realized that the only way to start believing in myself is to take a long hard look, decide what I liked and what I didn't like about me, emphasize the good, and change the bad. I think I'm a pretty good person, but being a good person doesn't make people see you as a good person. You have to see yourself as the best person you can be, then exude that.

The point is, no one can give you positive self esteem. It's something you have to build yourself. AS to how to go about doing that? Here are some suggestions:

1. Acknowledge that its a struggle, make a decision to change and go from there
2. Set small easily attainable goals and celebrate achieving them. Build on that then move up to bigger goals
3. Recognize that the only important thing is how YOU feel about YOU
4. Do what makes you happy, regardless of what thers think. If you are truly happy, you will exude high self esteem.

As for the will, again, you will have to muster that on your own, and likely enhancing your self esteem will improve that. You have to really want to make changes or you never will make them. Remember that this deosn't mean you will be perfect every day, but on those bad days, put them behind you and move on. Rome wasn't built in a day.

Good Luck!

Feel free to add me as a friend if you'd like.

Sue