If your gonna be negative, don't comment!
monkeybuttsmommy
Posts: 343 Member
Let me start by saying this had not happened to me, yet, and I hope it doesn't. But friends of mine on here have complained occasionally that they get negative comments about their exercise, food etc. There is a difference between giving helpful advice or sharing experiences. Its a total other situation if your leaving comments like "Nothing you eat is really good for you!" or "You will never lose any weight doing THAT exercise!" You may think your helping but your not. Please re-read what you write and if it sounds judgemental or too harsh either re-word it as a supportive statement or don't leave a comment at all.
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Right on!
This is a place of support no negativity aloud! 0 -
Thank you for posting this! I totally agree!0
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:drinker:0
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i totally agree, unless someone specifically asks for tough love , have some respect.0
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you spelled you're wrong. :huh:
:laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
Just kidding! I agree 100% LOL0 -
wow! if someone wrote that on my wall, i'd delete that 'friend'.0
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i totally agree, unless someone specifically asks for tough love , have some respect.
Tough love works for some people, but I agree with you, you should make sure the person WANTS tough love before giving it!
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I definitely agree that this needs to be a supportive environment, but it should also be an honest one. If I post that I want to lose 8 lbs a week, I sincerely hope that someone tells me how unrealistic that is.
People should be tactful, but when you post in a public forum, there are always going to be people who disagree with each other.
As I said, I don't disagree entirely with what you are saying - people just need to perhaps find a kind way of getting their point across.0 -
"like"0
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I SO agree!!!!! If you don't have something nice to say, don't say anything at all was what my mom taught me. If you ask for my advise I will give it to you in the best way possible is the modification I made to it. Still I mostly live by what Mom taught me. Hugs!0
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you spelled you're wrong. :huh:
Would you beleive I'm a college graduate??? LOL When I get mad I type faster than my brain can spell!!!0 -
Crap and I just spelled BELIEVE wrong! LMAO!!!!!0
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as my mother always said.....................If you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all !!0
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I definitely agree that this needs to be a supportive environment, but it should also be an honest one. If I post that I want to lose 8 lbs a week, I sincerely hope that someone tells me how unrealistic that is.
People should be tactful, but when you post in a public forum, there are always going to be people who disagree with each other.
As I said, I don't disagree entirely with what you are saying - people just need to perhaps find a kind way of getting their point across.
This is all I meant... thank you.0 -
you spelled you're wrong. :huh:
Would you beleive I'm a college graduate??? LOL When I get mad I type faster than my brain can spell!!!
HAHAHA
I know what you mean, I just thought it would be funny in an ironic sort of way.....no offense:flowerforyou:0 -
I seriously cant beleive people on here are that rude....that's such a shame!!!0
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Crap and I just spelled BELIEVE wrong! LMAO!!!!!
LOL I wasn't gonna say it...............0 -
I have to say, I have been bowled over by how lovely and supportive people on here are compared to every other forum I have used (they all seem to descend into factions and *****ing, and I see none of that here).0
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I have to say, I have been bowled over by how lovely and supportive people on here are compared to every other forum I have used (they all seem to descend into factions and *****ing, and I see none of that here).
I personally haven't seen it either but friends of mine have commented recently and I was surprised. Im of the opinion there is always a delete button, but for some they don't want to do that. But that is thier choice.0 -
i agree and want to tell you that for up to an hour after you post, you can edit that post for corrections and additions.0
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Give it time.... and look for the "eat my exercise cals or not" threads.... Yikes!!I have to say, I have been bowled over by how lovely and supportive people on here are compared to every other forum I have used (they all seem to descend into factions and *****ing, and I see none of that here).0 -
How is that rude? If you are eating unhealthy things, what do you want them to say?0
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How is that rude? If you are eating unhealthy things, what do you want them to say?
There is always ways to say it that can still inspire and not be a total drag. Give options and always be supportive. These comments were niether.0 -
How is that rude? If you are eating unhealthy things, what do you want them to say?
I think she made it very clear that it's the delivery, not the content of the message, that makes the difference.
Here's two ways I can address someone who I want to speak to about their exercise:
way #1. "You're never going to see results if you do it that way"
way #2. "I've found this____ to be more effective, maybe you should try it and see?"
Which would YOU rather hear?0 -
How is that rude? If you are eating unhealthy things, what do you want them to say?
I think she made it very clear that it's the delivery, not the content of the message, that makes the difference.
Here's two ways I can address someone who I want to speak to about their exercise:
way #1. "You're never going to see results if you do it that way"
way #2. "I've found this____ to be more effective, maybe you should try it and see?"
Which would YOU rather hear?
Thank you!0 -
Hmmm well monkeybutt I concur. I usually don't make my diary public because frankly my dear, I don't need it to be critiqued. It's obviously working, and working well. If I wanted help I would ask for it. But on occasion when I want extreme accountability, I'll make it public.0
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How is that rude? If you are eating unhealthy things, what do you want them to say?
First, if people didn't ask for the advice, it's presumptuous to offer it.
And second, this is a PROCESS. For many, it begins with getting a handle on how much we're eating, then transitions into quality of food.
My diary is FAR from perfect, but it's getting better. I know many of the things that i need to work on, but I choose to tackle one or two goals a week, in the hope of building better habits. Once I get one thing down, then I move onto the next goal in cleaning up my diet.
But if you looked at my diary, and didn't ask any questions, you wouldn't know that. You'd just see the stuff I haven't mastered yet.
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yip i agree someone left a comment on my blog that said they were disappointed to see me putting a negative light on wieght loss. they said i should be happy because i was more healthy etc etc. It bothered me because they just totally didnt get what i was saying and making out like i would rather be 130lbs heavier again. um...no thanks.
I got the impression that they didnt actually read it!! they maybe only read the title, which was totally tounge in cheek, and just said losing weight is expensive - i need a whole new wardrobe! its not a problem i mind having. i love shopping : )0 -
Thanks monkeybuttsmom! You're a great supportive friend :drinker:
It gets to be one of those things where if you believe every post on here that someone puts or email you receive there is absolutely nothing on this planet that you can eat because everything seems to have something wrong with it! If you see I am shoveling a whole pie in my mouth daily and nothing else, say something please!!! But if I eat a sandwich from a certain chain restaurant, please don't send me a website from a source that probably isn't even that accurate telling me how the grains in the bread will cause my pancreas to shut down and blow up! (I am just giving a fictitious grand example about what is out there and what people will read and believe just because its on the internet!!)
I just get so put off by this junk. Every thing you stick in your mouth runs some kind of risk. You just have to make the best choices you can with what you got to work with.0 -
How is that rude? If you are eating unhealthy things, what do you want them to say?
I think she made it very clear that it's the delivery, not the content of the message, that makes the difference.
Here's two ways I can address someone who I want to speak to about their exercise:
way #1. "You're never going to see results if you do it that way"
way #2. "I've found this____ to be more effective, maybe you should try it and see?"
Which would YOU rather hear?
lol people on here are way to sensitive I guess. Simply saying "Hey you are not eating the right foods" is hardly something I'd call rude.0
This discussion has been closed.
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