The Struggle

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  • girlwithcurls2
    girlwithcurls2 Posts: 2,267 Member
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    What she said.

    All of it. My mantra is: "Make one good decision. Then make another." (And if you make a bad decision, think about how that felt at the next crossroads.) You can do this. It's like being in the batting cage without a bat. Grab a bat. You know how to hit all of this down, it's just a lot coming at you at once. <3
  • jennifurballs
    jennifurballs Posts: 247 Member
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    Motivation is a tricky thing and it's different for all of us. There were a combination of things that initially motivated me to change my life, which I won't bore you with. However, staying strong for months, and even years, takes a mindset. You have to decide that your health is tantamount to any indulgence, office junk, whatever your weakness is. Until you know and believe that, you will not stick to your new life.

    I know and believe that I want to be healthy. Losing weight and feeling better is a huge motivator for me. Besides just losing weight, lifting weights, and becoming more fit has really helped. Also, having worked so hard at it, I don't want to undo all that by going back to my old, unhealthy way of life.

    Now that I'm approaching having lost 100 lbs., people in my family, or people who see me in the gym, tell me what an amazing thing I've accomplished or that they tell people about me because what I've done has inspired them. That's pretty freakin' cool, considering that I never in a million years thought I would inspire anyone to get healthy. It also makes me feel like a jerk, because I wouldn't be where I am today, had I not gained all that weight in the first place.

    I struggle every day to keep to my plan. It's particularly not easy because I have my son, who's 14 and can eat nearly anything he wants, and my mother, who's trying to kill herself slowly with booze and food, who live in my house. I don't restrict the food that I buy for them because it empowers me and I have to live in the real world, where there are temptations everywhere. If I can resist them in my own house, I can resist them anywhere. They've both had donuts and McDonalds for lunch today. I had a delicious salad with grilled chicken that was under 300 calories and was proud that I had that instead the crap they were eating.

    Whatever the reason(s) was that made you start your journey, remember it every time you're tempted to make a bad choice or blow off your exercise. Nothing tastes as good as being healthy feels!!!

    Best of luck to you!

  • jofjltncb6
    jofjltncb6 Posts: 34,415 Member
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    Have you tried logging consistently and accurately while eating at a reasonable net calorie deficit?
  • sofaking6
    sofaking6 Posts: 4,589 Member
    edited October 2014
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    MamaRiss wrote: »
    BZAH10 wrote: »
    I think a common mistake is expecting and/or waiting for that feeling of motivation before making changes. Motivation may have been what started you on your journey, but expecting it to always be there and to rely on it is not realistic.

    I don't wait to feel motivated before I go to work, or clean the house, or do the laundry, etc. I do those things automatically because I need to. Same with eating healthy and exercising. Just do it! Don't WAIT to feel motivated first.

    This. I was pissed off this morning, didn't want to work out, do chores, or eat "healthy". But I did it. Still miserable, but I'm not losing the day do to lack of motivation. I have my days that I do just say screw it, I'm not doing it today. But I try my best to limit it to one day, and then get right back on track. As far as treats and junk, if I want it, I make it fit. As long as I keep active, I can afford to indulge in a treat and not go completely off the rails

    Me, rolling out of bed at 4:30 this morning: "F this F this F this F this F this F this ok now I'm working out".

    If only I *could* be like that with laundry! Laundry only gets done in desperation.

  • Justin_34
    Justin_34 Posts: 15 Member
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    If you really want to lose weight and stick to your weight loss goals you have to learn to say no to junk food and stop eating out and buy your own food. It doesn't cost much to eat healthy. On top of that, try to exercise regulary, before work or right after you finish. It's really not that difficult to do. Once you get started it's much easier to stick to it long term.
  • chrisbell86
    chrisbell86 Posts: 2
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    At my work we have morning meetings that nearly always include pastries and bagels. I started bringing in a handful of nuts and a piece of fruit to eat in the meetings. I eat this while others are eating the junk. I was surprised how much it helped to be able to just eat while others were, even though it wasn't the same food. I think for me, it's feeling left out that creates the problem. Having to sit there and endure while others are sharing in the moment was hard.

    The fact that you've lost weight and are trending in the right direction means that, while this is a new challenge, it's not a derailment. It's time for adjustments, not all out do or die changes, just adjustments. Remember, the solution is never to just endure a situation like this and hope that willpower alone with get you through it, that is difficult and becomes self defeating. Create an action plan such as having emergency healthy snack food available at work. Or eat healthy beforehand. If possible, leave the room and/or take a walk. I've used all of these. I have also been frank with others about my diet. Several people have started to bring in fruit with their birthday cakes, brownies, etc. so that I can participate. This really surprised me. :smile: I still get the whole "oh come on one bite won't hurt" stuff, but when they do I get on my soapbox and lecture them about junkies and just one shot of a drug. If nothing else they back off just to shut me up.
  • MelodyandBarbells
    MelodyandBarbells Posts: 7,725 Member
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    I just remembered something else which is to use the Food notes function in the diary to record my thoughts if I felt my diet was going off the rails. It just helps seeing it written and sometimes becomes clear what I need to do. I've also posted on my friends list for support - nice to get helpful suggestions and also realizing others are in the same boat and we can do it together.
    jofjltncb6 wrote: »
    Have you tried logging consistently and accurately while eating at a reasonable net calorie deficit?

    Actually this should be seriously considered. If OP you have your account maybe setup to 2 lbs per week right now, you could change it to 1 lb per week and you'd be able to fit a few more nice treats on a regular and controlled basis and still lose a good amount of weight. Sometimes the too aggressive deficit can be worse because we just cannot adhere and wind up having way too many splurge days, anyway

  • eldamiano
    eldamiano Posts: 2,667 Member
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    You dont learn to say no. You do it. Simple.
  • kjoac002
    kjoac002 Posts: 11 Member
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    chrisbell86 wrote: »
    The fact that you've lost weight and are trending in the right direction means that, while this is a new challenge, it's not a derailment. It's time for adjustments, not all out do or die changes, just adjustments. Remember, the solution is never to just endure a situation like this and hope that willpower alone with get you through it, that is difficult and becomes self defeating.

    LOVE THIS!!!
    To be honest its partly just laziness on my part. Its easier to say yes and to eat everything in sight. Its harder to be able to say no and if I could say no and stick to my guns before then I should have no problem doing it again. Life is all about temptation. I gotta learn somehow.
  • jonfitz1
    jonfitz1 Posts: 3 Member
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    I always have a really hard time resisting snacks when working. At my last office there were biscuits and sweets out on display all the time! Plus the invites/birthdays like at your place.
    Suggestions :
    - Drink lots of water. Always have some on your desk. Take constant sips
    - Bring your own snacks (I found bananas the best) . Always choose them first
    - If you cant resist whats on offer, eat 1/2 of however much you *really* want

    Finally :
    - dont try to be perfect, but think about being good enough!
  • sherambler
    sherambler Posts: 303 Member
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    Temptations at work have been tough for me. It's strange because I hate donuts and I've never once craved a donut in my normal life, but as soon as they are on a table outside of my office, it's like I would just die if I didn't have a donut. There's the monthly pizza parties, the payday chinese food, and the nearly monthly OPOs (office pig outs) where everyone contributes something. I keep a few manageable treats in my desk drawer in limited quantities to snack on when things get tough. I try not to give into work place goodies because I know for me it would be a slippery slope.
  • drepublic
    drepublic Posts: 180 Member
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    Forget will power...think WHY Power. Why do you want to lose weight? When this reason becomes strong enough you'll do what it takes. You get results when WHY > EXCUSE and not until then.

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