Offended people because I didn't take a chocolate

I always take the free food offered to me. I will usually take a nibble and if it's worth the calories, I eat it. If it's not worth the calories/individually wrapped, I put it in the communal food area of my work. If it's not wrapped, I take it home and my husband eats it.

I'm assuming you ordered from Starfucks. I ordered a plain black coffee from there once when I was passing through an airport. The girl behind the register literally looked at me like I spoke another language. She said "a what?"

It took a couple of times of me repeating myself that yes, I said BLACK COFFEE, no sugar *kitten*, or fake taste, or what ever. The manager actually had to come over and say sorry and give me my coffee.

That girl obviously wasn't the brightest crayon in the box.

With that said, some people I think just don't understand when others deny "treats".

my aunt is the kindest and most precious person in this world and she would never hurt anyone's feelings. if someone offers something to her and she doesn't want it (or can't have it, etc.) she just smiles and says thank you and then disposes of it later. at a family wedding this weekend, she politely accepted champagne that was handed to her (she has never had an alcoholic drink in her life) and when the waiter's head was turned, she "traded" with my cousin, who had been given plain cider. i like to follow her lead because she is so sweet and seems to have a very giving heart. so if the coffee house had offered me candy, i think i would have said, "thank you" accepted it, and then given it to my daughter, or to someone else sitting in the store. just my opinion

refuseresist wrote: »

What's cider where you come from?

sparkling apple juice, no alcohol. the waiters were handing out champagne & cider in "champagne-type" glasses, and some people got the cider and some champagne. you could request one or the other, but most of the waiters didn't speak english.

My grandmother knows I'm losing weight (32 lbs so far), yet when I stay with her, she always offers me donuts, ice cream, chips, etc. I just say "no".

Either;
1. Stop caring what people think
2. Take the cookie and don't eat it
3. Pretend you've got a gluten allergy

cgvoabc wrote: »

I was raised to be polite ALL...THE...TIME. My wife hates that about me. I'd rather take the chocolate and not eat it then refuse it and risk offending someone. Good or Bad; I don't know but that's how I manage those types of situations.

You can politely refuse. That is possible. It's all in the delivery. If those you are refusing take offense, that's on them, not on you. They aren't being polite to you if they force food on you through guilt.

Hehe

Next time drink the milk...

I'm vegan, lactose, gluten, corn, and oat intolerant. People don't usually give me crap about politely saying no thank you.

I say, if it's from a stranger, just politely say no thanks and you've done all you can do. You're not responsible for how they react.

However, if a friend is offering you a cookie they made, I'd say take one. One cookie won't kill you and it's worth it to show appreciation to your friend for his/her kind gesture.

If you want to eat it, make the room in your day for it. Otherwise "No, thank you" is polite and enough. If people push you after that, they are the rude ones.

clariemoo wrote: »

I just got some dirty and wtf type of looks cause I said no to the free piece of chocolate with the coffee I ordered ... the people behind the counter stared at me like I was an alien and were like "omg but its free!!!!!" . What is it with the obligation to eat something cause its free ?

I'm calling BS. Cafe employees are not going to be "offended" by a customer politely refusing free food. They might be surprised, but not offended. They don't care about you or what you think and their feelings are not engaged. I smile and say "no thanks" to free treats from people who are employed to offer them to me all the time and everybody seems to take it in stride. I am 44 years old and no one has ever acted as though I were socially "obligated" to take free food from a cafe or restaurant worker.

There's either a lot more to this story (for instance, perhaps you have a history with these workers and they already don't like you because you've earned it: you do sound like you've got a hair trigger temper), or a lot less (this simply didn't happen and you really just want to resent and blame people for offering you food that you didn't really want to turn down at all).

How deal with calorific treats offered by loved ones or colleagues without offending them is a valid question. Free food in cafes is not.

Commander_Keen wrote: »

clariemoo wrote: »

I just got some dirty and wtf type of looks cause I said no to the free piece of chocolate with the coffee I ordered ... the people behind the counter stared at me like I was an alien and were like "omg but its free!!!!!" . What is it with the obligation to eat something cause its free ? Its that
type of mentality that caused me to overeat/gain weight in the first place and that I had to unlearn per say and learn how to say No to food (which was tough).

I also hurt one of my friends feelings cause I refused a cookie from her once ...

Have you guys ever offended people due to that ? Have you even hurt relationships or how do you even respond?

Next time,
Just take the offering and trash it when they are not looking.
or say I am saving it for later.

Taking someone's cookie and then trashing it sounds like way more of a dick move than just being honest with them in the first place. Just have a bit of backbone and politely decline; don't lie to their face and waste the food they spent time and money preparing.