Should I just accept the fact I will always look thin?

2

Replies

  • macchiatto
    macchiatto Posts: 2,890 Member
    I agree that you look healthy in your profile picture. That said, that is indeed a lot of stress to deal with in a year's time. I am glad you have sought counseling and are getting into more specialized treatment soon. I would try to focus on that right now and eating for health. I agree it should be possible to up your cals a bit. I haven't checked your diary but can you add some more healthy fats (avocado, etc.) to up your calories?
  • Owlibee
    Owlibee Posts: 138 Member
    OP, how do you even know if you are eating enough to gain? I checked your diary and you haven't even been logging regularly.

    I suggest logging your calories and seeking professional help about your body image issues as well as whatever anxiety issues you are suffering from.

    I became more stressed having to log my calories and became obsessed with high calorie foods to a unnerving level. My partner wont let me log calories or weigh myself daily as it is more destructive then helpful. I add up my calories as the days goes on and make a mental note.
  • Owlibee
    Owlibee Posts: 138 Member
    Owlibee wrote: »
    Owlibee wrote: »
    Owlibee wrote: »
    VaikeVihm wrote: »
    I can't take you seriously. Just love yourself the way you are, because you look pretty healthy to me. You don't need to gain -or lose- weight. Just.. be. Metabolism has nothing to do with it. You wanna gain weight? Eat. Eat eat eat. It ain't hard to understand.

    I am underweight. got it confirmed both my my GP at hospital by a dietitian.

    I do have a high metabolism. My body is always active and always shaking. it is never still and so I burn far too much. My heart beats fast all the time. Its like my body is running all the time. Bit hard to explain but last time I went to hospital they said thats what the problem was.

    You are only underweight by 0.4 points. And 2,000 calories is not enough to gain weight. Eat more.

    My GP refused to give me medication because he said my body is too thin to cope with it. I dont think he would have said that if my weight was okay. I was told I need to gain a stone before I can take any kind of medication.

    Medication for what…?

    I was more underweight than you are (97 lbs and 5'4") and I was given anxiety medication… So your GP is full of crap.

    You are considered underweight if you have a BMI less than 18.5. You have a BMI of 18.1. I had a BMI of 16.6. You are BARELY underweight. Get a new doctor.

    Contraceptive medication and stronger anxiety medication. Only medication I am on at the moment is to keep my heartrate steady as if it gets too high I need to go to A&E

    You're not listening to what I'm saying…. You are barely underweight.

    As for your doctor saying you need to gain weight in order to be prescribed birth control and anxiety medication….. That's a lie. There's absolutely no reason why you cannot take a SSRI or SNRI (typical anxiety medications). There's also no reason you cannot take birth control. Find a new doctor who actually knows what they are talking about.

    Finding a new doctor might not be possible as I'm assuming she's in the U.K.

    Anything's possible. I highly doubt the psychiatry practice OP goes to only has ONE doctor. If OP wants help badly enough, she will seek help where help can be found… even if it means traveling some ways to get there.

    They only have one Doctor - use to have two but one left. I cannot afford to travel or pay privately. The only other doctor in my area is my OLD doctor whom I moved from because he removed my allergies from my file and I ended up being prescribed medication I was allergic to (Penicillin)
  • Owlibee
    Owlibee Posts: 138 Member
    macchiatto wrote: »
    I agree that you look healthy in your profile picture. That said, that is indeed a lot of stress to deal with in a year's time. I am glad you have sought counseling and are getting into more specialized treatment soon. I would try to focus on that right now and eating for health. I agree it should be possible to up your cals a bit. I haven't checked your diary but can you add some more healthy fats (avocado, etc.) to up your calories?

    I cannot stand Avocado but I can add more high fats to my diet :) Can you recommended any other foods that have a high concentrate of fats or oils?
  • allaboutthecake
    allaboutthecake Posts: 1,535 Member
    For what its worth, years ago I had a gf who was naturally thin and trying to so hard to gain. She ate about 2,500 calories and finally added 4 lbs after 3 mo. She was so happy! It all came off with one bout of flu. Fast forward to early 40's, her body finally has some soft curves to it as she has aged...tho not at all unfit or overweight. Perhaps your natural thinness is hereditary?
  • TavistockToad
    TavistockToad Posts: 35,719 Member
    Owlibee wrote: »
    macchiatto wrote: »
    I agree that you look healthy in your profile picture. That said, that is indeed a lot of stress to deal with in a year's time. I am glad you have sought counseling and are getting into more specialized treatment soon. I would try to focus on that right now and eating for health. I agree it should be possible to up your cals a bit. I haven't checked your diary but can you add some more healthy fats (avocado, etc.) to up your calories?

    I cannot stand Avocado but I can add more high fats to my diet :) Can you recommended any other foods that have a high concentrate of fats or oils?

    You've been given loads of ideas for high fat foods in all your other threads....
  • Owlibee
    Owlibee Posts: 138 Member
    Owlibee wrote: »
    macchiatto wrote: »
    I agree that you look healthy in your profile picture. That said, that is indeed a lot of stress to deal with in a year's time. I am glad you have sought counseling and are getting into more specialized treatment soon. I would try to focus on that right now and eating for health. I agree it should be possible to up your cals a bit. I haven't checked your diary but can you add some more healthy fats (avocado, etc.) to up your calories?

    I cannot stand Avocado but I can add more high fats to my diet :) Can you recommended any other foods that have a high concentrate of fats or oils?

    You've been given loads of ideas for high fat foods in all your other threads....

    Yes but those were weeks ago and I cannot find the threads.

    Why is everyone so rude on here? No matter what thread I post people like to question me and look down there nose at me. Seems like I am dammed no matter what I ask!
  • TavistockToad
    TavistockToad Posts: 35,719 Member
    Owlibee wrote: »
    Owlibee wrote: »
    macchiatto wrote: »
    I agree that you look healthy in your profile picture. That said, that is indeed a lot of stress to deal with in a year's time. I am glad you have sought counseling and are getting into more specialized treatment soon. I would try to focus on that right now and eating for health. I agree it should be possible to up your cals a bit. I haven't checked your diary but can you add some more healthy fats (avocado, etc.) to up your calories?

    I cannot stand Avocado but I can add more high fats to my diet :) Can you recommended any other foods that have a high concentrate of fats or oils?

    You've been given loads of ideas for high fat foods in all your other threads....

    Yes but those were weeks ago and I cannot find the threads.

    Why is everyone so rude on here? No matter what thread I post people like to question me and look down there nose at me. Seems like I am dammed no matter what I ask!

    I don't know why you found my comment rude? I was only asking a question?

    You can't find the threads, fine, that's all you needed to say!

    Nut butter, nuts, seeds, olive oil, full fat dairy, salmon (if you eat fish) are all high in fat and therefor high in cals.
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  • Owlibee
    Owlibee Posts: 138 Member
    Owlibee wrote: »
    Owlibee wrote: »
    macchiatto wrote: »
    I agree that you look healthy in your profile picture. That said, that is indeed a lot of stress to deal with in a year's time. I am glad you have sought counseling and are getting into more specialized treatment soon. I would try to focus on that right now and eating for health. I agree it should be possible to up your cals a bit. I haven't checked your diary but can you add some more healthy fats (avocado, etc.) to up your calories?

    I cannot stand Avocado but I can add more high fats to my diet :) Can you recommended any other foods that have a high concentrate of fats or oils?

    You've been given loads of ideas for high fat foods in all your other threads....

    Yes but those were weeks ago and I cannot find the threads.

    Why is everyone so rude on here? No matter what thread I post people like to question me and look down there nose at me. Seems like I am dammed no matter what I ask!

    I don't know why you found my comment rude? I was only asking a question?

    You can't find the threads, fine, that's all you needed to say!

    Nut butter, nuts, seeds, olive oil, full fat dairy, salmon (if you eat fish) are all high in fat and therefor high in cals.

    I always thought salmon was a very lean fish , thank you for the recommendation :)
  • FatFreeFrolicking
    FatFreeFrolicking Posts: 4,252 Member
    Owlibee wrote: »
    OP, how do you even know if you are eating enough to gain? I checked your diary and you haven't even been logging regularly.

    I suggest logging your calories and seeking professional help about your body image issues as well as whatever anxiety issues you are suffering from.

    I became more stressed having to log my calories and became obsessed with high calorie foods to a unnerving level. My partner wont let me log calories or weigh myself daily as it is more destructive then helpful. I add up my calories as the days goes on and make a mental note.

    Your priority shouldn't be gaining weight at the moment anyways. Your priority should be taking care of your mental illness(es).
  • Aviva92
    Aviva92 Posts: 2,333 Member
    edited November 2014
    yeah, you look fine. you don't look too thin. The BMI limits are not really accurate and you're only slightly underweight based on them anyway. The mirror method tells me you are fine.
  • WanderingBomb
    WanderingBomb Posts: 69 Member
    Owlibee wrote: »
    Owlibee wrote: »
    macchiatto wrote: »
    Yes but those were weeks ago and I cannot find the threads.

    Why is everyone so rude on here? No matter what thread I post people like to question me and look down there nose at me. Seems like I am dammed no matter what I ask!

    I did not look down on you, nor was I rude, I gave you solid advice that I have seen work first hand for other. You chose to ignore it and instead argue with other who's view points you don't agree with. You need to look within yourself to find answers and approval, NOT the forums. Its a lions den for everyone regardless of what they post.
  • gemmamummy
    gemmamummy Posts: 185 Member
    Please don't think I me rude and genuinely I mean this in the kindest way: I have seen many posts by you stating the same issue. From looking at your pics I don't think you look underweight enough to warrant the amount of stress you are putting on yourself. I think you look healthy and have a figure most would be envious of. BMI isn't the be all and end all. BMI puts my husband at clinically obese, however he is body builds seriously with very low bodyfat %, his weight comes from the size of his huge muscles. Take BMI with a pinch of salt and enjoy your life.
  • PwrLftr82
    PwrLftr82 Posts: 945 Member
    TL;DR the whole thread.

    You do not look underweight to me, but you do look like you probably have a high body fat %. If you lift weights and eat a little more (2200 cals/day) I can almost guarantee that you will gain some weight, especially in the form of muscle). Your body composition will improve and you will be at a higher, "healthier" weight.
  • JoRocka
    JoRocka Posts: 17,525 Member
    eat more.

    period.
  • yoovie
    yoovie Posts: 17,121 Member
    I'm sorry you feel so frustrated, but I have no way of helping without knowing what you are already trying in order to correct this - or if it even needs to be corrected. My mom was bird thin and always complained of these same things, so I know with some people it's natural.

  • MyChocolateDiet
    MyChocolateDiet Posts: 22,281 Member
    Owlibee wrote: »
    Psych evaluation and thyroid tests. Good luck!

    Already had both of those. Came out that I was on the "dangerous" end of depression. Thyroid tests all came back normal

    Wherever this waiting list for specialized therapy is, please write or email them citing your "dangerous end of depression" and also your physical manifestation of anxiety as so underweight as your Dr. feeling uncomfortable to prescribe you meds.

    Hopefully one of these reasons will seem urgent enough to give you priority status on this wait list.

    In the meantime. Do log as has been suggested. Do add oils and etc. to your foods to up the cals with little volume. Do be patient with yourself. You are going through a very hard time right now and most people would feel a little different after being attacked. Don't give up on your efforts it will take effort and persistence to get you back on an even keel, all your trajectories are pointed toward ways to heal so just keep moving forward and whenever a feeling of doubt sets in like today, don't let it get the best of you. :flowerforyou:
  • MyChocolateDiet
    MyChocolateDiet Posts: 22,281 Member
    edited November 2014
    Owlibee wrote: »
    Owlibee wrote: »
    macchiatto wrote: »
    I agree that you look healthy in your profile picture. That said, that is indeed a lot of stress to deal with in a year's time. I am glad you have sought counseling and are getting into more specialized treatment soon. I would try to focus on that right now and eating for health. I agree it should be possible to up your cals a bit. I haven't checked your diary but can you add some more healthy fats (avocado, etc.) to up your calories?

    I cannot stand Avocado but I can add more high fats to my diet :) Can you recommended any other foods that have a high concentrate of fats or oils?

    You've been given loads of ideas for high fat foods in all your other threads....

    Yes but those were weeks ago and I cannot find the threads.

    Why is everyone so rude on here? No matter what thread I post people like to question me and look down there nose at me. Seems like I am dammed no matter what I ask!



    Nut butter, nuts, seeds, olive oil, full fat dairy, salmon (if you eat fish) are all high in fat and therefor high in cals.

    OP sometimes when I want to save important information I post it to my wall, I click on my profile and find the "about me" section where we are allowed to write freely. You might want to save these ideas there.

    Alternately here's a gif healthy_high_fat_foods_draft_2.jpg

    if you save it as one of your profile pics or even your main profile pic it will be easy to find when you need it. Good luck.

    :flowerforyou:
  • supplemama
    supplemama Posts: 1,956 Member
    I feel bad for you because you are obviously very stressed by this. But 8 stone at 5'6 is just a smidgen underweight, just barely. Your pictures do not suggest that you are so thin that sleeping is painful because you don't have enough body fat. On the contrary, you appear to have proportionally more fat than what I'd expect from your weight and height. I think counseling might be in order here, because it seems you have body dysmorphic disorder. You are not as thin as you seem to think you are.
  • JeffseekingV
    JeffseekingV Posts: 3,165 Member
    Owlibee wrote: »
    This is going to sound like such a whiny post but I am at such a low point at the moment.

    My weight has failed to get above 8 stone. I managed to gain a pound or two here and there but it would quickly fall off again due to my extreme stress levels. If I have a good week and manage to pack the calories away I see no change in my weight. I cannot look in the mirror anymore or let my partner touch me.

    Should I just accept the fact that due to my metabolism and stress levels I will always be this twig like? Should I just embrace it and ignore the bad looks and comments?

    I am 8 stone and 5 foot 6. I have no *kitten*, no boobs and no curves. Sleeping is also painful due to having no fat there to cushion my body.

    I have tried everything. Unfortunately my stress levels are so high my body burns faster then I can put in. Before the stress I was 10 stone and had curves. My diet has not changed , just my anxiety.

    Looking at your profile pics, you look perfectly normal. I wouldn't raise an eyebrow if you either wanted to lose weight, gain weight, gain muscle or just stay exactly where you are.
  • PwrLftr82
    PwrLftr82 Posts: 945 Member
    Owlibee wrote: »
    This is going to sound like such a whiny post but I am at such a low point at the moment.

    My weight has failed to get above 8 stone. I managed to gain a pound or two here and there but it would quickly fall off again due to my extreme stress levels. If I have a good week and manage to pack the calories away I see no change in my weight. I cannot look in the mirror anymore or let my partner touch me.

    Should I just accept the fact that due to my metabolism and stress levels I will always be this twig like? Should I just embrace it and ignore the bad looks and comments?

    I am 8 stone and 5 foot 6. I have no *kitten*, no boobs and no curves. Sleeping is also painful due to having no fat there to cushion my body.

    I have tried everything. Unfortunately my stress levels are so high my body burns faster then I can put in. Before the stress I was 10 stone and had curves. My diet has not changed , just my anxiety.

    Looking at your profile pics, you look perfectly normal. I wouldn't raise an eyebrow if you either wanted to lose weight, gain weight, gain muscle or just stay exactly where you are.

    I completely agree.
  • AskTracyAnnK28
    AskTracyAnnK28 Posts: 2,817 Member
    supplemama wrote: »
    I feel bad for you because you are obviously very stressed by this. But 8 stone at 5'6 is just a smidgen underweight, just barely. Your pictures do not suggest that you are so thin that sleeping is painful because you don't have enough body fat. On the contrary, you appear to have proportionally more fat than what I'd expect from your weight and height. I think counseling might be in order here, because it seems you have body dysmorphic disorder. You are not as thin as you seem to think you are.

    I agree with this ^^^^ but all this has been stated to you in all your previous posts about how thin you are so I dunno....

  • Jennloella
    Jennloella Posts: 2,286 Member
    Eat more. I eat more than 2000 calories a day in maintenance. Lift weights, would help with your stress too.
  • PwrLftr82
    PwrLftr82 Posts: 945 Member
    supplemama wrote: »
    I feel bad for you because you are obviously very stressed by this. But 8 stone at 5'6 is just a smidgen underweight, just barely. Your pictures do not suggest that you are so thin that sleeping is painful because you don't have enough body fat. On the contrary, you appear to have proportionally more fat than what I'd expect from your weight and height. I think counseling might be in order here, because it seems you have body dysmorphic disorder. You are not as thin as you seem to think you are.

    I agree with this ^^^^ but all this has been stated to you in all your previous posts about how thin you are so I dunno....

    How did I miss this response! Harsh, but the truth hurts. I agree. I had also mentioned in my first comment that the OP's LBM is on the low side and body fat appears high for her height and weight.
  • jasonr1009
    jasonr1009 Posts: 342 Member
    wanna switch issues????
  • There's so many people who want to lose weight and others who want to put weight on. If you are unhappy with your size then I say go do whatever makes you happy. If that's being 120,140,160,180,200,220. It doesn't matter. This is YOUR life and you make the decisions in it. To put on weight you could drink protein shakes, eat bread, eat nuts, eat beef, eat cornbread, collard greens, pasta, ect. & al though I would LOVE to have your body because it's beautiful in my eyes.. We are different people & desire different things.. so like I said.. you want to gain weight? Go for it. Good luck on your journey Owlibee.
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  • Janneson
    Janneson Posts: 19 Member
    Owlibee wrote: »
    This is going to sound like such a whiny post but I am at such a low point at the moment.

    My weight has failed to get above 8 stone. I managed to gain a pound or two here and there but it would quickly fall off again due to my extreme stress levels. If I have a good week and manage to pack the calories away I see no change in my weight. I cannot look in the mirror anymore or let my partner touch me.

    Should I just accept the fact that due to my metabolism and stress levels I will always be this twig like? Should I just embrace it and ignore the bad looks and comments?

    I am 8 stone and 5 foot 6. I have no *kitten*, no boobs and no curves. Sleeping is also painful due to having no fat there to cushion my body.

    I have tried everything. Unfortunately my stress levels are so high my body burns faster then I can put in. Before the stress I was 10 stone and had curves. My diet has not changed , just my anxiety.

    Look I read this entire thread. And we all want to help you. But every time someone gives you a suggestion you just make an excuse as to why their suggestion isn't helpful.

    Unfortunately it looks like this community does not have the answers you seek even though we want to help. You said you're getting both mental help and help from a physical doctor. Ask them or ask yourself.

    I'm sorry you're going through so much right now. It's really hard. I went through the same thing in High School. If your weight is really that dangerously low but you can't eat solids like I couldn't drink your calories like someone else in this thread said. That was the only way I could get the nutrition I needed without gagging and vomitting. That's the only advice we have here.

    We're really sorry but it looks like this community doesn't have any better advice to give you. So when you're ready to stop making excuses for yourself please come back and ask again.

    I think the problem is more mental then physical. Perhaps start up a support thread or go to a mental health forum where more people can help you and sympathize with your issue at hand.
  • JoRocka
    JoRocka Posts: 17,525 Member
    We're really sorry but it looks like this community doesn't have any better advice to give you. So when you're ready to stop making excuses for yourself please come back and ask again.
    Bah- don't apologize. The community has given her great answers.

    You're next sentence is correct- when someone is willing to make a change and no make excuses they find a way- or they realize the answers they did get where what they needed in the first place.
This discussion has been closed.