Is it important that your Spouse lose weight too?



  • Tanie98
    Tanie98 Posts: 675 Member
    edited November 2014
    Yes I would prefer it if my SO is into fitness watches his weight. Then again I woudn`t start something with a guy that's overweight and out of shape to begin with.
  • DeWoSa
    DeWoSa Posts: 496 Member
    edited November 2014
    MrM27 wrote: »
    My girlfriend lost 13 pounds over about three - four months. Her husband decided he wanted to lose weight too and he lost 22 pounds in two months. It totally demoralized her.

    That makes absolutely no sense at all^^^

    Ah -- let me explain. She lost 13 pounds because her caloric intake was less than her calorie output. Her husband lost 22 pounds for the same reason.

    I hope that helps.
  • As long as naked time is still good, does it really matter? :)
  • indianwin2001
    indianwin2001 Posts: 296 Member
    No-My wife is tiny to begin with
  • DeWoSa
    DeWoSa Posts: 496 Member
    MrM27 wrote: »

    Sounds like someone is trying to play the victim.

    Exactly. See, you do understand!
  • stopdropandlose
    stopdropandlose Posts: 162 Member
    I'm not married, but I am in a serious relationship with my boyfriend of over 1.5 years.

    He's decided to join me on this journey for many reasons. The first is that he is unhappy with his appearance. The second reason is that heart disease runs in the family. Third, he knows how hard it is for me to be good when all he wants to do is go out and eat junk. Lastly, he knows I get kind of obsessive when it comes to losing weight and healthy eating and he really wanted to help me do it the right way.

    I would love him no matter what size, but I do think a healthier lifestyle is important for him because it will help him feel better about himself and help with his physical health.
  • It's not important to me at all. My partner has in fact lost a great deal of weight and is now too skinny - I dislike it and he gets comments on it, from family and even work colleagues - and is a gym obsessive. It's his choice, as much as I dislike it. In return, I wouldn't expect him to pressure me into losing weight and he doesn't. He mentioned it ONCE before I started my diet and he's lived to regret that!
  • HMonsterX
    HMonsterX Posts: 3,000 Member
    My partner is obese, her 16 year old child is morbidly obese...the 11 year old is underweight, the 8 year old is fine, the 4 year old is morbidly obese.

    I've tried many times. But...there's none so blind as those that will not listen.

    So, they have their takeaway pizzas, cakes, crisps, etc...and i have my turkey mince.
  • MyChocolateDiet
    MyChocolateDiet Posts: 22,281 Member
  • mykaylis
    mykaylis Posts: 320 Member
    yes, it is an issue. his BMI is 55. i don't want him to keel over and die on me. i'm not going to put the screws on him but i do hope he'll follow my lead and make a few changes.
  • cantumelia
    cantumelia Posts: 59 Member
    One of my goals at losing weight is encouraging my husband to do the same!. Not succeeding yet but wait and see!. He´s witnessing my progress and is thinking of losing weight himself. Perhaps in time he will.
  • Vanilla_Lattes
    Vanilla_Lattes Posts: 251 Member
    My DH has an autoimmune disease that actually makes it very hard for him to sustain a normal weight. He is chronically UNDERWEIGHT, so its a little different in our situation. I have been all over the board since we've been together, and he's never been anything but supportive of me. He never mentions my weight or makes me feel unloved. He loved me at my heaviest weight and at my lowest. He's never treated me different, even sexually, and I am very appreciative. I would award him the same respect no matter his weight.
  • Nekrachael
    Nekrachael Posts: 74 Member
    My Dh and I got overweight together, and we've lost weight together. Most things we do involve being "on the same team". Not that we ever said, "Hey Honey, let's get fat!", but we did make other life choices that made being fit more difficult for awhile. Now, we are very happy to be where we are fitness-wise.

    The thing about the OP's questions and many of the responses is that I cannot figure how a committed couple can be genuinely supportive if they do not share similar goals. Those goals might change with fitness being more and less important over time, but when one person feels like it's time to address fitness, it effects a whole household. I cannot imagine getting a divorce over fitness, but I can imagine some huge discussions if one of us felt the time was right to focus on fitness and the other one was struggling with a horrible job or a sleepless child. It would seem like both were blind to the other's reality, and that means there are much bigger problems than a high BMI.

    From where I sit now, having been obese and having been in the same relationship for 25 years, I can genuinely say my partner's weight would not make or break a relationship. However, if it felt like it was time to address it, you can bet I would engage him in many, many discussions about his/our health and our priorities.