Ugh! Husband!

so sorry does the gym you attend offer child care? Take your little one and let them play while you work out. It will give them a new environment, let them see you in action, and give you and your husband plenty of quality time when he gets home

Have any of you dealt with a significant other that did not support you and how do you cope? I'm beyond frustrated!

My sister! She says she wants to lose weight but she hates the healthy food I try to feed us (we live together) and rolls her eyes when I say how many calories I have left for the day. UGH! I've just decided to ignore her and do my own thing.

im gonna add you as a friend if thats ok. my hubby is the same way! he is also active duty army and doesnt get it. he has just recently agreed to try my healthier recipes when he redeploys. i started mfp at around 200 lb, and i am 5'1"! i completely feel your pain!

My kids are in college now, but I workout at the YMCA and they offer free childcare while the parents workout.
Or maybe you and another stay at home mommy could barter on childcare.


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Wish I could help you, but my Hubby is kind of the opposite, almost Too Supportive, if you can be. Hopefully your gym does offer child care, or maybe you could work out child care with a friend or neighbor?

My husband makes it difficult for me to eat healthy also. He is always craving fast food, and I have been known to give in and go with him. I have been improving at saying no, and also at including him in the healthy meals I make. He is starting to enjoy when I "make-over" something normally bad for you, and turn it into something less bad or even good for you. I had to talk to him about it a few times also, especially because we want to have a baby and I want to make sure I am healthy for pregnancy. Sometimes, though, just to avoid problems, I just make separate meals for us so he doesn't complain

If you have any stay at home mom friends maybe you could trade babysitting favors and go to the gym during the day. Or swap the gym for a daytime exercise that can include your child. Walking, running, bicycling, skating can all be done with a young one if you purchase the right equpment (surely less expensive than a gym). Or if you have room for it invest in a good piece of home exercise equipment and make use of nap time.

I have yet to deal with the food issues because my husband is deployed right now. When he was home on R&R he did eat things that he "didn't like" before (like asparagus, shrimp...). We are both trying to get into better shape. He has lost a LOT of weight over there. He has promised me that we will be more active and we will workout together when he gets back. I am hoping that it will happen. I want to have a good diet down before he gets home that way him coming home won't interrupt that. I know it will change my routine and things like that.

Tell him that changing his diet will make him healthier, not necessarily make him lose weight. The Army is cracking down on weight and the fitness tests. He will do better at the tests if he's eating better...idk. LOL. Sounds good anyways.

I've been on my weight loss journey for about 6 years (this includes 2 pregnancies, so I've had to start all over again twice). He gives me crap all the time about what I fix, and is always wanting to make things that are not really good for me. Of course, he's also overweight & just doesn't want to try. So we're different in that. He doesn't understand at all, and is always trying to get me to eat things that are a weakness for me. When he gives me garbage about what I fix, then I tell him that if he doesn't like it, he is more than welcome to fix something else for himself. If he insists on being that way, and actually takes you up on it. Don't let him get you down. Its hard when you don't have a supportive significant other, but you can do it!!

I have a four & a two year old, and it is tough. I don't go to a gym, but I do aerobics videos at home (30 Day Shred, Zumba, The Firm). I try to work out during their naps. I don't know if this would work for you, or not but it is an option. With my hubbies wacky work schedule, there is no way I could ever make it to a gym. If thats such a big deal to him, maybe you could try that. Just don't let him take your motivation from you! Hope this is helpful!! Don't give up!

First off, I am sorry he is acting like this towards you. He should be supportive of your choice to get healthy.

At first, it was hard for my fiance. He had to either learn to like the things I was eating or cook himself his own meal. But, after he saw how much better I valued myself and all the confidence I was gaining just by feeling healthier, he tried harder. He would try some of the foods I would eat and I gave myself a cheat day each week so we could have a good (and not so healthy) meal together.
I would say after the first couple of weeks, it got better for me. Maybe you could try sitting your husband down and telling him how his actions are making you feel (using "I feel..." statements). Maybe he honestly doesn't know he's being as bad as he is. You could also try checking into a daycare at your gym. And maybe make a meal that is more of your old norm once or twice a week and then you only eat a little with a salad on the side. Big changes take compromise from both sides, so if he is willing to make some compromises, let him know you are too.

Hi Ashley,

First of all - congratulations on starting mfp and already losing so much! (:

You mentioned that you are a stay-at-home mom. Is there any way you could work out or exercise at home while your husband is at work? I've always hated going to a gym, so I rotate a couple of Jillian Micheal's dvds (Burn Fat,,, and Trouble Spots) and I walk (briskly) around my neighborhood. Your toddler would probably love getting out while you walk!

As far as the food is concerned, try a few things at a time with your husband. Always serve him more than you serve yourself. Find ways to fix the things you like but with a healthier twist. Like whole wheat hamburger buns, brown rice, lower fat milk, less butter, etc. Stress how you want to start eating right so that you'll be healthy as you get older and point out the old people around you that have all sorts of health issues b/c they've not eaten right! (We all know some @:)

You'll need internal motivation! But for external motivation, stick with this site b/c everyone here is so encouraging and probably going through a lot of the same things! Good luck! Valerie

mien is a downer as well. we both were thinner when we first started dating. He's gained 70lbs and i put on about 50 ( due to two pregnancies and not healthy food choices!). Now that Ive finally started losing weight and getting real about this i feel like he's sabotaging me!!!!!!! I had the problem of kids and working out as well! i HAVE FOUR so i know the feeling there, but like the prior post said The YMCA has child care. I was going 5-6x a week that i ended up getting a part time job there! lol,,,,the pay sucks but its worth it since i can bring my kids with me and then be sure to get my work outs in.
As far as the foods.....this is a constant battle here since my hubby is a truck driver he is constantly eating fast foods and when he's home he wants to eat that way as well. He's not a veggie,brown rice, oatmeal, whole grain eater So i usually feed the kids their normal things and tell hubby he can eat with them, or he can eat what I'm eating.
Now typically most people would say " make two meals? that's nuts!" But hey, i cant force my kids to eat clean....it just wouldn't be fair. Of course they get veggies and fruits but i still feed them their mac & cheese and peanut butter with jelly sandwiches:)
I guess over all i can say is i relate to ya. i'll add you as a buddy

There are nights that I cook two meals...his (hubbies) and ours (mine and my son). Its what I have to do to get healthy and lose weight. And as for working out....I get up when he leaves and before our son that way, I get a few minutes of me time. May not work for everyone, but its working for me. Of course, he is actually very supportive of my choices and, even watches the son while I work out on weekends.

Gotta make time for each other, too, if you want to stay married--kids need both parents. I try to avoid becoming overly obsessed with the fitness thing to where other important parts of life suffer. I find exercise I can do at home, and the kids are supportive of that time, or they become involved in the exercise with me, and make it fun.