Is it still worth doing if you know you will fail?
Options
Replies
-
Decide not to fail!
Easier said than done, I know, but if you start deciding you've already failed you're not giving yourself a chance.
This time is different - don't fail!
What do you want more - to have to keep saying "I tried but I failed" or to eventually say "I kept trying until I succeeded"?
You CAN do it, just decide to, honestly
0 -
Good for you for deciding to log. I'd recommend looking at Dr. Yoni Freedhoff's recent book The Diet Fix: Why Diets Fail and How to Make Yours Work. He emphasizes that if you don't enjoy your lifestyle, you'll give it up, so the challenge in weight loss is how to eat as few calories as you need to enjoy life. The book is a little gimmicky (it starts with a 10-day reset) but generally it's quite sound.
By the way, the question you asked at the beginning makes me think of another one: is life worth living if you know you will die? I certainly think so!0 -
I had posted something a little similar when I started. I was just starting out AGAIN, and had a track record of doing well for a few days and then blowing it. It was depressing. So was the weight. I didn't know what to do.
It's been 63 days now, and I can tell my entire mindset has changed. Do you want to know what I did?
First, I made a goal to not look at the big picture but to the present day. It can be very overwhelming when you look at it as a week, a month, a year. Yuck...that makes me cringe even right now! TODAY! What will you do today? Try to eat at your calorie goal. Maybe take a walk. That's it. Then tomorrow, do that same thing. Soon enough, it'll have been a whole month.
Come here daily, and read the threads. Talk to people. Even if it's for 10 minutes. Everytime I do, it inspires me to want to do good today. Because...remember....its all about "today".
And another thing, coming here and logging your food -- no matter what -- generally helps. If anything, you probably won't GAIN more weight if you are really trying. So think of it that way. I was having a problem not getting past a certain weight until this week. It was depressing....BUT.....at least I hadn't GAINED any weight in two months.
This IS a lifestyle. You just have to eat less (and move more). No whole bags of chips. You CAN really live if you don't eat whole bags of chips! And you will feel BETTER too.0 -
SmartAlec03211988 wrote: »Well that escalated quickly.
lmao0 -
MakePeasNotWar wrote: »Are you trying to fix everything all in one go and feeling deprived? That would make me eat a bag of cheetos, too. What if you just picked one or two small things to change, then once they were solid habits, take on another. Obviously you will lose more slowly, but if you can truly take your time to build up small habits, you'll be able to maintain your weight loss for life.
Maybe try just logging for a while, until it's second nature. Then look through your diary for something that seems easy to fix - the "low hanging fruit", as it were. Or in my case, the low hanging cheesecake, lol
This!
0 -
conniebug76 wrote: »MakePeasNotWar wrote: »Are you trying to fix everything all in one go and feeling deprived? That would make me eat a bag of cheetos, too. What if you just picked one or two small things to change, then once they were solid habits, take on another. Obviously you will lose more slowly, but if you can truly take your time to build up small habits, you'll be able to maintain your weight loss for life.
Maybe try just logging for a while, until it's second nature. Then look through your diary for something that seems easy to fix - the "low hanging fruit", as it were. Or in my case, the low hanging cheesecake, lol
I do go all or nothing a lot. I know all the "right" things to do, so I do them. Then I get stressed out keeping up with it all: staying in calorie budget, getting enough water, getting enough protein, getting enough veggies, exercising enough times, getting my heart rate up, stretching, strength building, meditating, etc.
I like the idea of just logging for a while. No pressure to change, yet, but it will let me have a good picture of what I'm doing "most" wrongly. Then I can change that.
Bingo! you got it!
0 -
Connie, what is the real issue? What's driving you to sabotage yourself? What are your thoughts about yourself? What's really bothering you? When we get to the bottom, the root of why we do what we do and start being kinder to ourselves, then the healing starts and the sabotaging becomes less and less until we gain control.0
-
Maybe you should do something different this time.
In the past you relied on your knowledge and planning to follow your calorie counting and exercise routines.
Have you ever followed a workout training program that was designed to move you forward instead of always doing the same thing?
Check it out. Most of us aren't knowledgeable enough when we start out to be in charge of our own program planning because we aren't sure what to do to move forward. ALl we know is eat right, exercise, rest, drink water and balance your strength vs cardio workouts.
But actually plotting those workouts for a few months, so you have to keep up with a program that carries you closer to your goals - will help with motivation, discipline and SUCCESS.0 -
Sorry, I haven't read most of the comments on here. You made it very clear what the issue is, you've already decided you're going to fail, no one can succeed at anything with that attitude. Make the decision that this time will be different, I mean are the Cheetos and other crap really worth it? Sure it's tempting, but you are in control of your own actions. If you haven't already or recently, maybe you should discuss your feelings with your doctor, it sounds like you might have some depression (or other medical issues) going on, and medication can make a world of difference for some people. Maybe don't go all out all at once, make small lifestyles changes. Trade ice cream for a yogurt, skip the creamer in your coffee, instead of Cheetos have a couple triscuits with cheese, water or tea instead of soda, park further away from the store so you have to walk. Take baby steps, change one thing at a time and be proud of yourself when you do.0
-
conniebug76 wrote: »Thanks for all the support from those that offered it. I logged all my food yesterday. I'm looking at it as the first day of my new streak!
I'm following some of the advice on here by starting off just by logging what I eat. I'm not changing anything or trying to stay in calorie range. I'm just making a habit of logging everything.
Thank you, again. Some of said things that really made me see things in a different way and made me believe that I really might be able to do this. So I'm giving it a go!
Her mind has shifted! Way to go MFPrs!! Good luck Conniebug76!!!
0 -
It's always worth it because one day, you might just stick to it. You might never know why, but that's kind of how I'm feeling right now.0
-
First, I apologize if I repeat stuff, as I didn't read the thread. I wanted to comment because I went through this cycle for quite a while until this year. I am by no means an expert, but I wanted you to know that you are not alone in this thinking, and you can get past it!
For me, the change stuck this time because I changed my perspective. In the past, I would focus on the "big picture" and it was so overwhelming thinking "I have to lose so much weight, and I have to get better at cardio for my heart health, and I have to figure out a regular exercise program and get my eating under control and...and...and...". It exhausted me just thinking about it all, and I got frustrated with myself that I couldn't do it all at once.
This time, I decided I'd only focus on one step at a time, and while I have long-term goals, my current goal is the only one I work towards. For me, that first goal was "Do not lie to myself". I gave myself permission to be honest, and be okay with things if they weren't perfect. This was a big deal to me, because there is a very large emotional component to my eating. Working through it requires that I be honest with myself, my weaknesses, and my strengths. Once I accepted my own permission to be honest (sounds stupid, I know), I was ready for the next step.
The next step I took was "Log every day, and log honestly". I admit, I wasn't, and still am not, perfect at logging, but logging everything for two months without worrying about the amounts, just accepting that this is what I had eaten that day, helped me to begin to identify the areas I really struggled with.
Only then, did I begin to focus on weight loss. Exercise was the last thing I added to the list, and as I see my "triggers" for emotional eating come and go, I am learning how to handle them without food. It is still very much a work in progress, but each set-back teaches me something new.
Good luck in your efforts, and feel free to friend me if you'd like support on here!0 -
LaurenCheek wrote: »I have been attempting to lose weight for about 18 years (I'm 24 and became obese in elementary school). Over the years, I have attempted SO many diets. Each one was based primarily around caloric restriction, and I would start to get hungry and binge each time. Usually around a week to three weeks into the effort.
I have struck gold with the low carb (ketogenic) diet. In the past few years (and most especially the past 6 months when I started counting calories carefully and tracking religiously, I have just melted with little effort. (Down about 40 pounds since this July, 95 pound loss total) The cravings and binges have stopped dead in their tracks. (I haven't binged over my daily allotted calories or eaten excess carbs for 12 weeks straight as of right now)
Here's the thing: I am NOT a person with intense willpower. I am actually rather weak-willed. My room is a mess and I can usually be found procrastinating tasks, but keto allows me to near-effortlessly control my calories and food cravings. (The second I eat high carb, the cravings and binges return!)
This leads me to believe that adherence to my plan is based on something that is happening hormonally inside my body in the absence of carbohydrates. (Research suggests: Insulin and ghrelin (fat storing, hunger activators) go down, leptin (satiety hormone) goes up on a diet like mine).
My point is, I had to change not only the AMOUNT of food I was eating, but also the TYPE of food. Calories absolutely count, but if you can't stick to your lower-calorie plan it could potentially be due to the effects of carbs in your diet. It certainly seems to be the case for me.
This is what worked for me, as well. It's definitely not for everyone and it's no magic solution, but it is worth I try. I didn't believe it until I actually did it seriously and it is very much worth it.0 -
conniebug76 wrote: »Thanks for all the support from those that offered it. I logged all my food yesterday. I'm looking at it as the first day of my new streak!
I'm following some of the advice on here by starting off just by logging what I eat. I'm not changing anything or trying to stay in calorie range. I'm just making a habit of logging everything.
Thank you, again. Some of said things that really made me see things in a different way and made me believe that I really might be able to do this. So I'm giving it a go!
It's very interesting that you say this. If you are so inclined, do a little research and reading by Gretchen Rubin. She writes about the four "Pillars of Habits" one of them being the "Strategy of Monitoring" and here's just a brief sampling:
" Monitoring is an observational strategy. It doesn’t require that I change what I’m doing, only that I know what I’m doing. This is crucial to habit formation, because once I recognize what I’m doing, I may choose to behave differently.
Monitoring has an almost uncanny power. It doesn’t require change, but it often leads to change, because people who keep close track of just about anything tend to do a better job of managing it. Tracking boosts self-control in key categories such as eating, drinking, exercising, working, TV- and internet-use, spending—and just about anything else.
It’s a Secret of Adulthood for habits: “We manage what we monitor.”
Self-measurement brings self-awareness, and self-awareness strengthens our self-control. And on the flip side, anything that makes us lose self-awareness weakens our self-mastery. Alcohol makes it all too easy to place giant bets at a casino; a long, stressful day can lead to a night of online binge-shopping; vacationing with a group of friends can make it easy to blow through a personal budget.
Actual measurement is crucial, because when we guess what we’re doing, we’re often wildly inaccurate. Unsurprisingly, we tend to under-estimate how much we eat and over-estimate how much we exercise."
It's worth looking into, IMHO.
0 -
Its all about baby steps! You didn't gain the weight in a month and its not coming off in a month either! Every little bitty positive change adds up to a lifestyle.
Also, here is a Thomas Edison quote for you:
"I have not failed. I've just found 1000 ways that don't work"0 -
Before I read this whole thread, I'm just going to say that I've been working really hard on my head the past few years and that has been the answer for me.
My behavior isn't perfect 100% of the time by any means, but my "setbacks" are fewer and shorter than ever. You said that you "binge for days...wallow in misery for months..." That used to be me, but not any more. I might still binge now and then, but I know now what I'm doing and why (monster fight with husband last weekend -- wow!), and the binge is short...within hours I was hitting the weights and going for a run and feeling better and eating smarter.
You might want to take a look at The Beck Diet Solution -- it's not a gimmick. It's taught me how to think differently about food and my relationship to it. Also, get help. I'm a reasonably intelligent and educated person -- I used to think I didn't need help because I *knew* what to do (donut bad, broccoli good...duh). But I've worked with a therapist and a dietician and they've made all the difference.
Best of luck...stick with it!
0 -
conniebug76 wrote: ». ... it seriously never occurred to me to be proud of myself for doing the workout or eating the veggies or logging everything this day. I've always been too wrapped up in how I should have worked out longer or harder, or I should not have had cheese on that salad. I figured pride was saved for when I hit goal.
Seriously, that is really eye-opening. It's like I never really listened to what I was saying before.
So, one thing that is FREAKING AWESOME about MFP is that if you have even a handful of supportive friends on here (if you don't already, go find some now!) they will help cheer you on when you exercise or make good food choices, etc. Pretty soon that sound of cheering will get into your head and it will be that much easier to do it for yourself! I serious love my MFP friends for this. It's so easy to be critical of ourselves but when you see other people struggle with similar things, you realize it's not doing them any good to beat themselves up about it.
Best of luck to you in your journey!
0 -
I am also a "failure", but I keep at it, you want to know why? Because I think, "geez, I am still fat, even though I try to diet..". Imagine how huge I would be, if I was not even trying..so, that is my motivation to keep at it...0
-
Connie it does sound like you are making progress.
In my case I had to realize my time was running out to address my major abuse of carbs. They are like alcohol to me I guess. I either have to be a T-totaler or I abuse in my case.
For the first time in a month I ate some carb stuff for our Christmas dinner but no deserts. Now my stomach is saying, "What in the heck are you doing up there?"
Well it is a year to our next Christmas dinner and I will get over it in a couple days. No one knows what will work for another but we do learn what does and not work for us personally over time.
After a life time of yo yo weight I have finally found a solution that works for me personally. I suffer so much if l let go just a little at only one meal after learning what it was like to eat right. In my case that is a GOOD thing that I can not enjoy what is bad for my health.
Breaking my addiction to Carbs was the hardest thing I have ever done. For others it may be a different eating lifestyle that needs to be stopped.
Not being the one that prepares the food is a plus. I think those who cook for a family that demands food that the cook does not need to be around makes it very hard.
I have had three guys near me around my age die from the side effects of diabetes this fall and others had to go to nursing homes because they were too fat to manage at home. I do not want life to end on a bad note because of my diet.
Keep up your effort and tell yourself what ever you have to tell yourself to make not doing it more painful than managing a good diet for yourself. 0
Categories
- All Categories
- 1.4M Health, Wellness and Goals
- 391.4K Introduce Yourself
- 43.5K Getting Started
- 259.7K Health and Weight Loss
- 175.6K Food and Nutrition
- 47.3K Recipes
- 232.3K Fitness and Exercise
- 391 Sleep, Mindfulness and Overall Wellness
- 6.4K Goal: Maintaining Weight
- 8.5K Goal: Gaining Weight and Body Building
- 152.7K Motivation and Support
- 7.8K Challenges
- 1.3K Debate Club
- 96.3K Chit-Chat
- 2.5K Fun and Games
- 3.2K MyFitnessPal Information
- 22 News and Announcements
- 922 Feature Suggestions and Ideas
- 2.3K MyFitnessPal Tech Support Questions