Grocery store nightmare
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I'm glad you can eat all these bad foods and still lose weight. I hope to be able to do that someday too.
I guess my main point was, all the advertisements and the way they position things in the store is to get you to buy the unhealthy stuff. Why don't they make it harder to find the "bad" stuff and easier to find the good stuff?
I'm very sorry if this sounds harsh, but please consider it tough love: sometimes you need a stranger to tell you the hard truth that your loved ones won't because they can't afford the confrontation with you.
You need to drop the victim mentality and take control of your own life. Pointing the finger at the grocery store, acting like they have some sort of conspiracy going on to keep you fat, or that it's their job to nanny you into fitness because you can't make good decisions on your own, is not constructive. It's not helping you. It's never going to help you.
I'm not one of those people who thinks that people are fat because they have no willpower, or self-control, or character. I used to be fat people (I've lost 160 pounds) and honestly I could become one again, because the reason people get fat is priorities. It's easy to let other things seem more important: eating too much food is pleasurable and easy. I hope my priorities don't change again, but if they do, it won't be anyone's fault but my own, even if they shift because my job becomes more demanding or unreasonable or whatever.
I laugh when people ask me what my "secret" is but hey maybe it's this: I never asked "them" to make it easy for me. It's work. It takes effort and focus. What I buy at the supermarket is /my/ responsibility, not "theirs." And "they" can't stop me.
You can't resist advertising? how do you function in the real world at all? Forget the grocery store, because you must eat fast food all the time given the ubiquity of fast food advertising, right? Do you give in to every ad and billboard telling you what shoes to buy, what car to drive, what clothes to wear, what gadgets to use? You must be perennially cash poor, since you can't resist advertising at all.
You complained that the grocery store sells unhealthy food that is "easy to cook." like that's their fault. /You/ choose foods that you think are "easy to cook" (by the way: subjective! Fresh fruit is easy. Veggies are easy. Lean meat is easy. Eggs are easy.) I don't see AT ALL how it's the grocery store's fault and not yours if you're buying calorie dense foods instead and you can't control your portion amounts.
Oh and by the way? The grocery store would love for you to buy more fruits and veggies, actually. Their margins on those foods are really high, actually, compared to stuff in boxes and cans, and they end up throwing a lot of it out because of spoilage. The issue is that the people who make stuff sold in boxes and cans are often big companies and they actually pay the grocery store for premium shelf space, promotional displays, etc. Fruits and vegetables are sold by farmers (sometimes big agribusiness farmers, but still, it's a different thing!) and those cooperatives don't have the same promotional operatives that the processed food manufacturers have, so the grocery store is "on their own" to promote that stuff, and they don't know how.
I'm tempted to correct you too on the idea that foods fall into two categories: "healthy" and "unhealthy." Foods are neither of these things. Your diet is "healthy" or "unhealthy": meaning either you're getting a calorie-appropriate amount of food that contains a good balance of nutrients, or you're eating calorie-inappropriate amount of foods and/or nutrient imbalances. Foods are a tool (they are also delicious) that contain nutrients and calories. Some foods are rich in some nutrients and poor in others. Some foods are poor in nutrients in general but delicious (helloooooo white rice!). Some foods are calorie-dense. Some foods are nutrient-dense. No single "superfood" is going to make your diet healthy if you eat too many calories or otherwise are messing up your nutrient intake. No single demon food is going to kill you if you are eating that food as a small part of a balanced, calorie-appropriate diet. I eat a lot of veggies and beans and lean meat and dairy. I also indulge in reasonable amounts of pizza and booze and nutella on a pretty regular basis: but those foods don't form the foundation of my diet. They are indulgences and I'm responsible for controlling their place in my diet.
And if I can't control their place in my diet? Blaming the grocery store that sells them to me is weak sauce, lady. Woman up. Take responsibility for your own choices. It's empowering.
Amazing post. Thank you!
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tl;dr Comment on my own post above:
Today's thought on people who say "moderation doesn't work for me": if a dog can balance a biscuit on his nose and not eat it, you can master moderation. That dog can control his urges when he makes an effort, and he is willing to eat his own poop the rest of the time. All you need to do is try.
You are my new favorite person in the forums. Seriously, your posts in this thread are spot on...
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Oh yeah, it's a nightmare. Our "town" has a population nearing 130k people and ONE decent grocery store so it's ALWAYS packed.
As for the selections they offer? No problems there. 0 -
I don't like grocery store fried chicken or baked goods. Never have. But I know they throw some chicken in the hot grease and bake cookies and bread in the oven at the end of the day when all of us worker bees are hitting the store on the way home. Tired and stressed out after a long day at the office, that stuff smells soooooo good. And I know they do it on purpose because even those with the best intentions of picking up stuff to make a salad are going to fall victim to this ploy. It's marketing, not evilness, but for a lot of people who are just starting out on their weight loss/fitness journey, it just makes things tougher. I would think that others who have already experienced this would be a little kinder and more understanding. The sanctimonious grandstanding in this thread is beyond the pale. Try being a little kinder and a little less determined to show everyone that you can eat cupcakes all day and lose weight.0
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tl;dr Comment on my own post above:
Today's thought on people who say "moderation doesn't work for me": if a dog can balance a biscuit on his nose and not eat it, you can master moderation. That dog can control his urges when he makes an effort, and he is willing to eat his own poop the rest of the time. All you need to do is try.
You are my new favorite person in the forums. Seriously, your posts in this thread are spot on...
This.
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The grocery store is a wonder of modern logistics and shipping prowess. I love it; I almost always enjoy going there. When I'm alone and not in a rush, I'll walk through every aisle taking it all in. What an incredible variety!
A retail store is like a museum of right now.0 -
None of us eat cupcakes all day and lose weight, because that would legit make us feel gross and hangry. I've eaten 10 brownies in 4 days (within my calories, because CICO) and although delicious my stomach has not totally approved. My tolerance has significantly decreased since I stopped binging when I introduced the concept of moderation and eliminated the concept of food demonization.Bustergirl14 wrote: »I don't like grocery store fried chicken or baked goods. Never have. But I know they throw some chicken in the hot grease and bake cookies and bread in the oven at the end of the day when all of us worker bees are hitting the store on the way home. Tired and stressed out after a long day at the office, that stuff smells soooooo good. And I know they do it on purpose because even those with the best intentions of picking up stuff to make a salad are going to fall victim to this ploy. It's marketing, not evilness, but for a lot of people who are just starting out on their weight loss/fitness journey, it just makes things tougher. I would think that others who have already experienced this would be a little kinder and more understanding. The sanctimonious grandstanding in this thread is beyond the pale. Try being a little kinder and a little less determined to show everyone that you can eat cupcakes all day and lose weight.
None of us are picking on the OP. We are pointing out to her that she is taking on a victim mentality, not placing responsibility of her actions on herself, and her view of food is really not all that healthy. These are things that she should be made aware of and should try to work on not only for successful weight loss, but for successful weight management and a happy life overall.
You know that they make these things specifically because people are coming home from work? how do you know that? Most likely they make meats throughout the day, or if htey make them closer to the evening it's because.. you know, more people will want to buy chicken at night for dinner instead of for breakfast. And who wants to buy a chicken that's been sitting out since 10am? As for baked goods, there's also a greater likelihood of them being made closer to when there will be a greater amount of traffic in the store for the same reason (freshness). But I can easily go in at lunch and see both of these things offered.
So grocers are supposed to assume that everyone is trying to lose weight and that x and y foods are "bad" for weight loss, even though no food is actually detrimental to weight loss? I've been at this for 7 months, I did this 5 years ago, and I NEVER had a blaming-mentality towards the grocery store. Even when I used to be restrictive and "ate clean," my choices and actions were all on me. As was any sadness i felt about not being able to buy the treats I would have loved eating. Now, even if I go to the store starving and buy way more than I need, I can easily walk by the candy aisle and not buy anything because I already know that I have some at home. Or conversely I will stock up on popcorn and chocolate and other delights and they will wind up being in my house for months because I moderate my intake. I still have Christmas chocolate laying around. At least half of what I received.
You, like the OP, need to stop playing the victim and blaming everyone else for the way life is. The world doesn't revolve around your decision to lose weight, nor is it sabotaging you.
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HappyCampr1 wrote: »Bustergirl14 wrote: »I don't like grocery store fried chicken or baked goods. Never have. But I know they throw some chicken in the hot grease and bake cookies and bread in the oven at the end of the day when all of us worker bees are hitting the store on the way home. Tired and stressed out after a long day at the office, that stuff smells soooooo good. And I know they do it on purpose because even those with the best intentions of picking up stuff to make a salad are going to fall victim to this ploy. It's marketing, not evilness, but for a lot of people who are just starting out on their weight loss/fitness journey, it just makes things tougher. I would think that others who have already experienced this would be a little kinder and more understanding. The sanctimonious grandstanding in this thread is beyond the pale. Try being a little kinder and a little less determined to show everyone that you can eat cupcakes all day and lose weight.
the store is making fresh chicken and making more bread so they can stay in business. 5-8 PM is a huge part of our daily sales. Of course we make fresh things for the upcoming business surge. It would be stupid not to prepare for our customers. Trying to make people understand that losing weight takes a bit of personal responsibility regarding food choices, isn't sanctimonious grandstanding.
I work in retail part time. It's like how we get more stock for certain types of things based on the time of year - a bunch of lame Valentine's Day stuff for instance popped up in January. I'm single, I get sad sometimes seeing everyone else in relationships because that's something I want, but I'm not blaming other people for my lack of being in a relationship. And I'm not getting mad at my store for having a Valentine's Day section because they are marketing something to try and make as much profit as they can.
CAPITALISM, BICHES.0 -
Could you imagine
"Ma'am, where are the cakes and cookies? I just got off work and would like a sweet."
"Oh, so sorry, we have to be socially responsible and turn off our ovens because you, and the rest of our customers who come in about this time, just aren't thinking straight when you all say you want cakes and cookies. To give you what you want would be to victimize you and we're not about victimizing people. Your welcome."0 -
Lourdesong wrote: »Could you imagine
"Ma'am, where are the cakes and cookies? I just got off work and would like a sweet."
"Oh, so sorry, we have to be socially responsible and turn off our ovens because you, and the rest of our customers who come in about this time, just aren't thinking straight when you all say you want cakes and cookies. To give you what you want would be to victimize you and we're not about victimizing people. Your welcome."
"Hi, bar-keep, can I get a rum and coke?"
"Sorry sir, but because there are alcoholics in the world, we do not sell alcohol. We have to assume that you are also an alcoholic and thus constrain your choices based on a sub-section of hte population that cannot and/or does not want to drink alcohol."0 -
emily_stew wrote: »Bustergirl14 wrote: »I don't like grocery store fried chicken or baked goods. Never have. But I know they throw some chicken in the hot grease and bake cookies and bread in the oven at the end of the day when all of us worker bees are hitting the store on the way home. Tired and stressed out after a long day at the office, that stuff smells soooooo good. And I know they do it on purpose because even those with the best intentions of picking up stuff to make a salad are going to fall victim to this ploy. It's marketing, not evilness, but for a lot of people who are just starting out on their weight loss/fitness journey, it just makes things tougher. I would think that others who have already experienced this would be a little kinder and more understanding. The sanctimonious grandstanding in this thread is beyond the pale. Try being a little kinder and a little less determined to show everyone that you can eat cupcakes all day and lose weight.
I understand what you're saying, but I don't consider recommending a grown adult take personal responsibility and stop looking to place blame as "sanctimonious grandstanding." I am kind and understanding. I am also an adult who was speaking to another adult when I chipped in with my advice a few pages back.
Yes, losing weight is often tough. Yes, there are lots of temptations. And????
Edit: OMG, I didn't even notice your last sentence (bolded) on my first read through. Find another argument, I'm so bloody tired of hearing that one.
IKR? Why does EVERYONE keep falling back onto that argument!? Do people here also assume that individuals who never consciously worry about their weight just never eat this type of food or something, because to eat any type of treat means it's the entirety of your diet?0 -
Lourdesong wrote: »Could you imagine
"Ma'am, where are the cakes and cookies? I just got off work and would like a sweet."
"Oh, so sorry, we have to be socially responsible and turn off our ovens because you, and the rest of our customers who come in about this time, just aren't thinking straight when you all say you want cakes and cookies. To give you what you want would be to victimize you and we're not about victimizing people. Your welcome."
Oh my gosh, there would be consequences. The aisles would run red with blood.0 -
emily_stew wrote: »emily_stew wrote: »Bustergirl14 wrote: »I don't like grocery store fried chicken or baked goods. Never have. But I know they throw some chicken in the hot grease and bake cookies and bread in the oven at the end of the day when all of us worker bees are hitting the store on the way home. Tired and stressed out after a long day at the office, that stuff smells soooooo good. And I know they do it on purpose because even those with the best intentions of picking up stuff to make a salad are going to fall victim to this ploy. It's marketing, not evilness, but for a lot of people who are just starting out on their weight loss/fitness journey, it just makes things tougher. I would think that others who have already experienced this would be a little kinder and more understanding. The sanctimonious grandstanding in this thread is beyond the pale. Try being a little kinder and a little less determined to show everyone that you can eat cupcakes all day and lose weight.
I understand what you're saying, but I don't consider recommending a grown adult take personal responsibility and stop looking to place blame as "sanctimonious grandstanding." I am kind and understanding. I am also an adult who was speaking to another adult when I chipped in with my advice a few pages back.
Yes, losing weight is often tough. Yes, there are lots of temptations. And????
Edit: OMG, I didn't even notice your last sentence (bolded) on my first read through. Find another argument, I'm so bloody tired of hearing that one.
IKR? Why does EVERYONE keep falling back onto that argument!? Do people here also assume that individuals who never consciously worry about their weight just never eat this type of food or something, because to eat any type of treat means it's the entirety of your diet?
I don't know, it's either that or the "Twinkie vs. Broccoli" dichotomy.
People just be weird.
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Grocery stores are filled with other people, flourescent lights, unpleasant sounds and smells (usually from people), lines, wonky carts, etc. If I didn't have to eat and stuff I'd never go to one.
I carefully write a menu for the week and then a grocery list in the exact order of the store to minimize the time and money I spend there. If I forget something I live without it for a week. No way is an unplanned cupcake or chips going to derail my shopping.
You just need to hate everything about being at the store a little more... Er, I mean develop willpower. Willpower and planning all the way!0 -
I work in retail part time. It's like how we get more stock for certain types of things based on the time of year - a bunch of lame Valentine's Day stuff for instance popped up in January. I'm single, I get sad sometimes seeing everyone else in relationships because that's something I want, but I'm not blaming other people for my lack of being in a relationship. And I'm not getting mad at my store for having a Valentine's Day section because they are marketing something to try and make as much profit as they can.
This is a really good analogy.0 -
I got two packs of Oreos tonight...
I ate four before dinner.
I'm going to go eat more after my kids are in bed.
Yeah so the last two days have not been exactly stellar for me, but it's not the end of the world. I'll figure out and log my meals for tomorrow while soaking up milk with my Oreos.
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Because idiocy and undereducation is rampant.emily_stew wrote: »Bustergirl14 wrote: »I don't like grocery store fried chicken or baked goods. Never have. But I know they throw some chicken in the hot grease and bake cookies and bread in the oven at the end of the day when all of us worker bees are hitting the store on the way home. Tired and stressed out after a long day at the office, that stuff smells soooooo good. And I know they do it on purpose because even those with the best intentions of picking up stuff to make a salad are going to fall victim to this ploy. It's marketing, not evilness, but for a lot of people who are just starting out on their weight loss/fitness journey, it just makes things tougher. I would think that others who have already experienced this would be a little kinder and more understanding. The sanctimonious grandstanding in this thread is beyond the pale. Try being a little kinder and a little less determined to show everyone that you can eat cupcakes all day and lose weight.
I understand what you're saying, but I don't consider recommending a grown adult take personal responsibility and stop looking to place blame as "sanctimonious grandstanding." I am kind and understanding. I am also an adult who was speaking to another adult when I chipped in with my advice a few pages back.
Yes, losing weight is often tough. Yes, there are lots of temptations. And????
Edit: OMG, I didn't even notice your last sentence (bolded) on my first read through. Find another argument, I'm so bloody tired of hearing that one.
IKR? Why does EVERYONE keep falling back onto that argument!? Do people here also assume that individuals who never consciously worry about their weight just never eat this type of food or something, because to eat any type of treat means it's the entirety of your diet?
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