So my dad died suddenly 3 days ago....

I'm so, so sorry. Sending a big hug xx

Thinking of you stargazegal: I lost my father last summer and a dear and close friend just three weeks ago, and the world has been very out of kilter for me. I would agree with what others have said about not feeling pressured to eat by the fact that people are giving you food. However, I would also say it IS important to eat. My mood is much darker when I am hungry, and I know I could easily drop into a cycle of depression if I do not eat sensibly. And getting out for a walk, or to the countryside, or to the sea, or wherever you find inspiring can also be a good thing to do (and it might help that cold). Grieving takes a long, long time. Do be kind to yourself!

First, I am sorry for your loss. I would not be too hard on yourself at this sad time. If possible be conscious of your portions. Now is the time for comfort. So sorry.

The lady who I knew as my Mom, my Grandmother raised me. I lost her 14 years ago. She was back then and still is to this day my strength. In all I am and all I do. Remember him with smiles. My Grandmother once said something to me & I carry that in my heart. I am sorry you are hurting. Continue to love him as you know he loves you. The sun will shine tomorrow unless you are lucky enough to have snow but you know what I mean. HUGE HUG! (I am here if you need to talk)

Liftng4Lis wrote: »

So sorry for your loss. Forget counting calories, let yourself grieve.

+1

A sudden death of a family member can be devastating, I know. My son died tragically 2 years ago and then his fiance committed suicide the next day.

My world stopped...I couldn't breathe....I felt a loss of control...I cried and I prayed and just existed in a fog of unbelief. Slowly, it became just living one day at a time. Logging on mfp helped me feel as though I was gaining some control back, that I had some semblance of real life, a hope for normalcy.

The pain lessened as the days passed. But my life, like yours will be, was forever changed. Now I REALLY live each day with all that I have, with all my passion-as though these could be my last days on this earth.

My prayers are with you for the peace of God that comforts those in sorrow and strengthens those in need.

Please feel free to message me-to reach out. Grief shared is so much more bearable.

I'm so sorry to hear that. I found my Mum dead when I went to check on her in December, so I know how hard it is. Feel free to PM me if you want to chat. I found most people don't understand what it's like to lose a parent suddenly (as opposed to when you know they are ill, can say goodbyes, etc). I ate whatever people brought me. I just needed to eat *something*. So I ate a lot of junk. It's been almost 2 months since I found her now and I'm back to the gym and back to eating healthy. Give yourself time. Don't worry about these things until you feel ready. I had so many logistics to deal with (sorting out her funeral, her house which was rented, closing all accounts, etc) that I just didn't have time to even think about food or gym for a long while. We lived off freezer junk. Just do what you need to do to get through this time.

If I could fly to where ever you are and give you a hug, I would. I sorta know how you feel, we were given 3 days to spend with my dad before he died. Those were the hardest days of my life. I agree with Sadiecara, eat when you're hungry and if you're not then just try a bite or two and keep up with the liquids. This is not the time to beat yourself up, you just lost a parent. Take time to grieve and when you're ready continue on this weight loss journey.

I'm so sorry If you're not hungry, just have a bit of the food and freeze the rest. But don't worry about it now.

stargazgal wrote: »

On Sunday, I received the shock of my life that my dad suddenly died....so now, after 21 days on track, measuring, staying within calorie range, working out..starting to get results....I'm off the rails and don't know what to do...
I'm not hungry but when ppl bring me food...I'm forced to eat and it's been high carb foods...not too healthy and I feel like I'm undoing all the past month...I haven't been to gym because on top of this grief I'm super sick with head cold , likely because I haven't stopped crying...not sleeping and not eating properly....I know I shouldn't be concerned with this right now...but... I fear I'll be back to square 1 or I won't get back on track.

I am so, so, so sorry for your loss. Your grief is raw and you should not feel guilt if soothing yourself involves high-carb goodies.

However--if you feel out of control, if people are pushing food on you, please don't feel forced to eat it. Tell the well-meaning people you've already eaten.

The good news is, exercise (when you're able to get back to it) makes you feel better emotionally. It might be a tiny dent in your grief, but it's better than nothing.

You probably won't end up back at square one--but if you do, it's not the end of the world.

Hugs to you.

I'm so sorry for your loss

Don't worry about logging if you don't feel up to it...MFP will still be here when you're ready.

As others have said, you may feel better if you do continue logging as it's something you can be on control of.

I've not lost a parent, but my mum was diagnosed with acute leukaemia in March 2012 and we weren't sure she'd make it. I wasn't using MFP then, but I was losing weight after my 2nd baby who was then 10 months old, and I continued going to the gym and counting calories as it made me feel better. She was in remission then relapsed in 2013 and went through treatment again, and I still continued logging and exercising. I've found that when I'm sad I can't eat, I totally lose my appetite. I also figured if anything did happen, I'd be sad anyway, so I may as well be thin and sad not fat and sad.

I'm so sorry for your loss.

Don't worry about weight loss right now. Just get through this time. When life starts to settle into the new normal then you can refocus on getting back on track. For now, pray, grieve and spend time with family.