We broke up because...
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he was never happy with how I smelled. Hurt my feelings.0
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She was way too sensitive0
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passersby could see his junk from down below when he stood there on the balcony0
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He refused to have sexy time on the balcony0
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she made me look bad by being too g-darn good lookin'.
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Her abs were better than mine
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He was always comparing our bodies, sorry but I don't need you telling me your *kitten* is better than mine!0
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Shaved me while I slept0
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left me alone in jail0
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He was a Jailbird!0
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she was too much of a rule follower0
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Never followed the rules.0
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she walked way too much
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He wanted me to carry him piggy back as I walked, even with my broken foot! Ouchie!0
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too many side guys, the competition was too exhausting0
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He told me he was into guys so I would break up with him.0
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I believed his lies when he told me I was the only one, the lipstick I found on him proved otherwise.0
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Found out she was into a lot of guys, they kept coming over all day long0
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She broke up with strozman for frivolous reasons!0
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She was dating @strozman I couldn't compete!0
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her confidence was lacking.0
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She turned our love life into a competition0
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he didn't like competition.0
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Turned out he was married!0
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I couldn't compete with the 6 women, 12 guys, and a few farm animals she had in our apartment.0
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he didn't like my animals.0
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He said my place was cluttered.0
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Found out she was married to several dudes.0
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