quesion/debate about women weightlifting

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in the past I have been able to lose weight just doing cardio. the older I get the easier it tends to come back on. So, I am wanting to try lifting weights and improving my muscle tone. I am currently reading a book "the new rules of lifting for women" and I am wanting to try lifting weights that are more than the typical 5-8lb dumbells that I normally use. I have friends telling me that they bulked up (man style) lifting heavy weights though. I want definition, I want to see muscle but I don't want to look like a female body builder.
Also, my hubby is telling me I need to lose the weight first then start building muscle.... its all so confusing! I have 20-30lbs to lose currently.
Any experienced advice is more than welcome!!
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Replies

  • Liftng4Lis
    Liftng4Lis Posts: 15,150 Member
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    It is VERY difficult to "bulk" up. Actually, you would have to be in a surplus with a combination of a lot of work. With the exceptions of newbie gains, you won't even build much muscle in a deficit, (this train I think can last about 10 months??). You will get stronger, maintain muscle mass while losing, tone and look better. Go get it!
  • HotPotato22
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    You burn calories when you lift, same as when you do cardio. You burn more doing cardio but you aren't adding as much muscle mass back. I want long lean muscles not bulky and I do a mixture of light(ish) weights at high reps and then pretty heavy weights at lower reps. I've only lost 7 lbs but I've also lost 6 inches from my waist and hips and I have so much more muscle tone. I do a combination of cardio and weights almost daily and I look and feel much better.
  • mollyr0425
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    I just started stage 2 of New Rules of Lifting for Women yesterday. I LOVED the information in the book and am enjoying the program so far. I regret not taking some pictures before starting stage 1 to compare my progress to but I do think I got some good results, especially in my arms and back. And judging by the amount of lunges in stage 2, I expect to see some results in my lower body soon!
  • mskinner1091
    mskinner1091 Posts: 180 Member
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    I just started lifting a month ago. I lift twice a week. I LOVE IT. You can tone your muscles without 'bulking up' From what I've read, it's important to tone & strength train during your weight loss journey. I think your husband may be incorrect in suggesting you start weights after weight loss. You can do that of course, but I'm pretty certain it's better to do it as you're losing weight. Good luck!
  • Sabine_Stroehm
    Sabine_Stroehm Posts: 19,263 Member
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    I've been lifting since 1996. I'm not bulky.
  • RavenousRachel
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    I have been lifting as heavy as possible for years now and bulky muscles are nowhere in sight. Women don't and can't bulk up without tons of steroids, period. And it feels SO GOOD to leg press 400lbs! 5-8lb weights do nothing unless you're 90 years old, and there's no such thing as "toning." You're either building dense muscle mass (density means it looks smaller than the fat that's there right now) or you're not. Women's magazines have a lot to answer for in spreading those vile lies.
  • terem00
    terem00 Posts: 176 Member
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    I've been lifting consistently for 3 years....I'm also not bulky! (Actually wear a size 4 or xs)
  • ew_david
    ew_david Posts: 3,473 Member
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    Your friends and husband are spewing archaic information they heard from somewhere else.

    I have been lifting for 2 years, while eating at a deficit (most of the time), and lost 30 pounds.
  • benjaminhk
    benjaminhk Posts: 353 Member
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    It is incredibly hard for women to bulk up from weight lifting without all the testosterone. Lifting weights is a great way to burn calories and is more efficient than doing repetitive cardio exercises (angry response prevention disclaimer: not implying that all cardio is repetitive).

    In other words, you can put forth a lot more effort in a short amount of time to get an equal or greater calorie burn than if you go on the elliptical for a longer amount of time.

    Back when I had a gym membership, I tried to do a little bit of both but I found it discouraging that I could spend an hour doing ellipticals and burn like half the calories that I was burning lifting weights for a shorter time. Plus, repetitive exercises get to be really boring.
  • sardelsa
    sardelsa Posts: 9,812 Member
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    Hmm... I actually just completed a bulk and didn't get bulky at all, so not sure what your friends are talking about. Maybe they lost weight and the muscle showed more, which isn't bulky it's just more defined. Definitely start lifting now to retain your muscle, I wouldn't wait.
  • Emilia777
    Emilia777 Posts: 978 Member
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    I’ve been lifting heavy for almost two years now (though I took a pretty long break from it until recently). I use the Rippetoe program, which you can find on bodybuilding dot com.

    First of all, the whole women bulking up from heavy weights thing is a myth. You have to work very, very hard to look anywhere near a female bodybuilder. Besides, as I understand it, to gain serious muscle mass you need to bulk (eat at a calorie surplus while lifting) and then cut (eat at a deficit and do cardio to lose any fat gained together with the muscle).

    Second of all, lifting is my absolute favourite thing. It seems to work great for my body, as I find I lose a lot more weight (or at least inches, as muscle mass is heavier than fat) when doing weight training than when I only do cardio. It also helps if you have any sort of chronic pain problems - I have back issues and core strength helps a lot.

    Third, I don’t know how heavy you want to go. I don’t lift too heavy but I have progressed a bit. For instance, I squat 100 lbs (3 sets of 5 reps each), deadlift 135 lbs (1 set of 5 reps), and bench press 60 lbs (3 sets of 5 reps). As you can see, my upper body strength is rubbish, but anyway. This works great for me and I will keep upping the weights.

    Lastly, regardless of what you end up doing, I highly recommend you are very careful to maintain good lifting form. With heavy weights comes big responsibility, and form is in my opinion the single most important thing in lifting.

    I hope this is helpful and feel free to ask anything!
  • Of_Monsters_and_Meat
    Of_Monsters_and_Meat Posts: 1,022 Member
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    As a man, I feel well versed in woman biology.

    Here is what I recommend to get in shape but not bulky.
    1 stop listening to people telling you not to lift
    2 keep with a progressive lifting program
    3 Throw out your scale and buy a tape measure
    4 don't take steroids/testosterone
  • lynndot1
    lynndot1 Posts: 114 Member
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    Unless you're eating a lot (A LOT) you won't put on "too much" muscle. It's not like a few cheat meals will do it either, bulking is a very conscious effort for both men and women, especially women. I lift 3-4 times a week going as heavy as I can go and I'm a size 2-4 in most things...nothing bulky here to speak of, hah.

    Since you still have ~30 pounds to go you can keep eating at your deficit and add weights in just fine. As you get closer to your goal weight you might notice a stall at the gym in which case you'll probably ease up on your deficit, but for now, meh. Go ham.
  • SR_86
    SR_86 Posts: 58 Member
    edited February 2015
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    Liftng4Lis wrote: »
    It is VERY difficult to "bulk" up. Actually, you would have to be in a surplus with a combination of a lot of work. With the exceptions of newbie gains, you won't even build much muscle in a deficit, (this train I think can last about 10 months??). You will get stronger, maintain muscle mass while losing, tone and look better. Go get it!

    I was wondering how long the newbie gains 'train' lasted! I've been lifting for 5 weeks and wondered if it was anytime soon, I didn't realise it would be months that's good news :)
  • ILiftHeavyAcrylics
    ILiftHeavyAcrylics Posts: 27,732 Member
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    Bulking is mostly about food. If you're eating a deficit you won't build significant mass (a few ounces of newbie gains maybe).

    When you lose weight you lose a combination of water, fat, and muscle. Lifting weights and eating adequate protein will help you make sure you lose mostly fat and keep most of your muscle.
  • mollyr0425
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    I think it's pretty much agreed on now by most people who know what they're talking about that MOST women just don't have enough testosterone in their bodies to get "bulky" regardless of how heavy they lift
  • erickirb
    erickirb Posts: 12,293 Member
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    mollyr0425 wrote: »
    I think it's pretty much agreed on now by most people who know what they're talking about that MOST women just don't have enough testosterone in their bodies to get "bulky" regardless of how heavy they lift

    not to mention if you are in a deficit to lose weight you will not add muscle anyway.
  • natebollinger
    natebollinger Posts: 24 Member
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    Bottom line, even if you are a guy, you don't "accidentally" get ripped. It's VERY hard work to put on mass and bulk up, especially if you are a woman. Lifting weights will be a great compliment to your cardio. Attack from all angles; strength (lifting), endurance (cardio), and speed (sprints). You will see great results and great caloric burn just sitting on your @$$ after working out by raising your metabolism.
  • _lyndseybrooke_
    _lyndseybrooke_ Posts: 2,561 Member
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    HUGE Misconceptions about Women Lifting Heavy (for you) Weights
    • It will make you bulky. Simply put, this is a load of crap. You can automatically assume that anyone telling you this has no clue what they're talking about. More about that later.
    • You should only start lifting weights after losing all or most of the body fat you plan to lose. Wrong again. During weight loss, you're going to lose both fat and muscle. Lifting while losing weight helps minimize muscle loss. The best time to start lifting is immediately.
    • Lifting weights tones your muscles. Muscles do not "tone." This "toned" look that many women want is simply the result of low body fat. Muscles get bigger, stay the same size, or get smaller. They do not "tone." The word is completely useless.

    What makes muscles grow from weightlifting is a calorie surplus. Your muscles need calories to grow. As I said, lifting while losing weight isn't about muscle gain, and any muscle mass gained while eating at a deficit will be very small and probably unnoticeable; it's about muscle retention. You can certainly gain strength while eating at a deficit, but gaining muscle takes a lot of work, and eating more calories than your body is burning is how most of us accomplish that.

    Regardless, women do not bulk up like men. We simply don't have the body chemistry for it. And if we are able to do it, it takes A LOT of work. Believe me, you aren't going to get muscular on accident. It takes a lot of work and dedication (and calories) to accomplish such a feat.

    In short, it's safe to assume most people outside of MFP don't know much about weightlifting for women, so take all advice you get from these people with a grain of salt. Actually, just ignore it completely. Read your book, lift some heavy stuff, and get stronger, healthier,and hotter so you can go back and show the naysayers how wrong they really are.
  • evileen99
    evileen99 Posts: 1,564 Member
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    Here's the picture I post all the time:

    On the left, woman at her goal weight. On the right, 15 pounds heavier after a heavy lifting program. Who looks bigger?

    bodycomp_zps680e3d53.jpg